Break Your Heart (14 page)

             
“Still fond of her mother, huh?”

             
“Yep. Same shit after every visit.”

             
“What do you mean?”

             
“Every time she comes home her mom has planted another seed of destruction in her head.”

             
“Yeahh, and what was it this time?” Momma asked, slightly amused.

             
“She brought up Gina.”

             
Momma swallowed hard looking back at Grant with a cautious smile. “Seems to me Gina is on everyone’s minds these days.” She left her comment open for Grant to interpret. She nodded as if to confirm her own thoughts of Gina. “I’m not surprised Grant.”

             
“What? Momma!”

             
“It’s just that you and Gina had something special Grant. That never goes away. I always thought you’d marry her.” She smiled slowly. 

             
Grant took a deep breath. He put his elbows on the table lowering his head into his hands. “Yeahh, I did too Momma.”

             
“You can’t blame the woman for protecting her daughter,” she paused, “even if she is a bitch.” Momma began to smirk at her own joke then rolled herself into a full-blown laugh.

             
“What’s so funny?”

             
“Remember when Gina cooked us dinner?” She could barely get her words out.

             
“I couldn’t believe how good it came out.” Grant replied recalling the night. He began to laugh, more at his mother’s uncontrolled giggle than the words she spoke.
What is so funny?

             
“I’ll never forget the way the kitchen looked!”

             
“Yeahh, Dad got her good.” He started to laugh as hard as her as he recalled the food fight that his Dad started between him and Gina. “The look on her face when he told her he was very upset at how messy the kitchen was. She actually thought he was serious,” Grant laughed.

             
“I know, and then he beamed the wall with a tomato!” Mamma laughed.

             
“She got him back. That was quite a food war.”

“I remember. It took us an hour to clean up.  I still find dried tomato seeds and noodles in the most random places every time I clean the kitchen,” she laughed.

              “Dad adored her,” Grant said.

             
“Yep, we all did Grant, she was like family.” Both fell quiet as they reflected on the past.

             
“How about that time she took a shower and thought we were here alone?” He said.

             
“Yep. We really got to know Gina that weekend.  I never thought I would find her standing in my kitchen naked!”

             
“She was so embarrassed.” Grants words fell out between his quick breaths as he let himself enjoy the sheer laughter the memories were bringing him.

             
“I could tell by her naked ass running quickly through my family room and up the stairs.” Momma laughed, “I don’t think she came out of the bedroom for an hour.”

             
“We were busy,” he winked.

             
“Spare me the details Grant,” she replied.  She slowly took a sip of her coffee, still somewhat lost in her memories of Gina. “Oh, but the two of you used to bicker all the time”

             
“That’s what we did best.”

             
“No, that’s what you did best.  I hate to tell you this but Gina was usually right.”

             
“That’s not true.” He smiled large knowing the truth he was trying to defeat.

“
Yeahh, maybe not always. But most of the time.”

             
“Whatever,” he laughed.

             
She smiled back at him warmly.

             
“I miss her Momma.  Is that wrong?” 

             
She looked over to her son cautiously. “I’m not sure.” She paused, “I don’t think it’s wrong to miss someone who was in your life and that you loved.  But you have a new life you are building with Sarah now, so watch your thoughts.” She sat wordless as she let her son think about what she was trying to say.

             
“I’m exhausted. I need to get some sleep.”

             
“Then why’d you drink coffee?”

             
“Good question.”

             
“I changed the sheets in the guest house.” She said,

holding her coffee cup up towards the back door.

              “Thanks Momma.” He walked over to her chair and kissed her softly on the top of the head.”

             
“I’m glad you’re home Grant.” She said as she picked up the paper in front of her.

             
“Me too, Momma.”

Twelve

             
“Its Friday!” Cindy Sellers tossed her straight, long brown hair back behind her shoulder and smiled that annoying smile that drove Gina crazy.  To one who didn't know her, Cindy would seem sweet and innocent to match her childlike face.  She was an overachiever and in her mid-twenties, still caught up in the idea of popularity.  Although Gina normally liked everyone, it took a deep breath and a heightened level of fake to get through time with her.  Cindy and Gina had started teaching at the junior high together three Yeahrs ago, however, they had known each other for longer than Gina would have liked. She could still remember the day she met Cindy in high school on the first day of freshman Yeahr. She was obnoxious and fake even back then, but on the outskirts of the crew Gina ran with, so she always did her best to let Cindy think they were friends.

              “It has been such a long week,” Gina replied.  She got up off the couch walking her now empty yogurt over to the garbage can.  The lounge was small and stale with white walls and no windows.  An old couch and lazy boy lined the back wall with a cafeteria table and some folding chairs in the middle of the room.  The fridge door almost always clocked the edge of the table, for it was a bit too big to clear the small space.

             
“Tell me about it.” Cindy said, plopping down on the couch.  “Five more weeks till summer!”

             
“I am counting the days.” Gina replied with a smile.

             
“Any plans this weekend?” Cindy asked. Her eyes were

wide with the excited look of a teenager during the last

minutes of a school week.

             
“Nope.  Adam is going on a fishing trip.  I think I am going to spend some time finishing up the wedding plans and relaxing.  Although, I’ll probably end up grading.  My students have a test today.” Gina responded, picking up her briefcase and heading towards the door.

             
“I am having everyone over this weekend!” Cindy rattled off quickly.

             
Gina looked back at her with a blank stare. She couldn’t tell if it was an invitation or just a random piece of information. Gina smiled to her waiting for clarification of her statement. Nothing came. “Sounds fun, enjoy.” Gina replied warmly.              

             
“Do you want to come?”

             
“Thanks, but I am going to take advantage of some alone time. Have fun.” Gina said opening the door and ducking out as quickly as she could.

             
“Wish those kids luck.” Cindy shouted. “If I don’t see you, have a good weekend.”

             
“You too.” Gina replied as the door was shutting behind her.  She headed out of the lounge and down the hall towards her room. 

             
The bell rang and doors flew open flooding the halls with students. The loud mumble of chattering middle-schoolers enveloped the space. Students past by, smiling and waving, ignoring and moving around Gina on their way to their next class.

             
Gina slithered her way in and out of the mass of students, down the side of the hall and into her classroom.  She took a seat at her desk, plopped her briefcase on the surface and pulled out a stack of papers settling them neatly in the right corner. She reached back into her briefcase, grasping her planner and it flipped it to a blank paper in the back to jot down a note. 

             
As the page turned the dried ink of an all-familiar name caught her eye.
Grant 980-555-1254.
The word flew off the paper and up to her eyes. Gina looked about her empty room and scanned her doorway to be sure no one was watching her. Tightness began to take shape in the pit of her stomach as she engaged in a staring contest with the writing on the paper. She recalled the moment she jotted down his number, first on a piece she tore out because she didn't like the way it looked, then once again here.  She wondered if she would ever have the nerve to actually call him.

             
Two girls bounced into the room chatting away about the details of the conversation that was had with another girl during lunch. They rambled on with quick and loud words, smiling to Gina as they each took a seat in the empty room. 

             
Gina looked back to the duo smiling warmly and nodded hello before returning back to the staring contest she had started with her page. She watched the number as if it was going to move or disappear or worse, give her the courage she needed to call. Nothing happened. The number sat in it’s dried ink, staring back at her.

             
“Good morning,” Gina’s voice projected into the room over the students that were continuing to pour into the space. She shook away the thoughts of Grant to assess the unusually quiet group that was now before her. She could feel the tense air that had filtered through the room. “It’s just a test,” she said calmly. “Do you feel ready?” 

             
Silence and blank stares returned her question.

             
“Miss Fotelli?”  The voice of one of Gina’s favorite students came from the front row.

             
“Yes, Nicole?”

             
“Did you decide if there was going to be an essay?”

             
“Yes. The test will begin with some matching.  The bulk of it is multiple choice.  At the end there are six topics.  You can choose two and write a short essay on each.” 

             
A subtle moan came from the students. 

             
“You’ll all do fine.  We’ve been working on this stuff for three weeks now. Just relax.” She picked up the papers she had set on the corner of her desk when she arrived and distributed a stack of tests to each student sitting at the front of the row. “Good luck.” Gina flashed them a confident grin and returned to the chair behind her desk.

             
The classroom grew still as her students worked away at the questions in front of them. Her mind drifted back and forth from thoughts of nothing to her working students as she gazed off into the morning sun.  As an attempt to pull her self back into focus, Gina shuffled through the papers on her desk reading up on a continuing education class she needed to take over the summer.  Her planner sat below her stack of work, open to “F”.   She kept staring down at his name.
Grant.
The name popped off the page as real as life. 
If you call him you are going to open a door.... or is it still open? I would just be shutting it, right?
She went back to reading about the different classes she would take this summer. It was taking her minutes to get through each sentence of the literature while she allowed her mind to flip back and forth to thoughts of Grant.

             
The loud crash of a locker door being thrown shut broke her thoughts. Gina looked up at the circular clock that sat above her doorway. “Five more minutes.” She politely warned.  Her students shuffled around a bit.  One by one they trickled towards her desk, setting down their test. The look of relief fell upon most of their faces as they sat back down in their seat. A subtle buzz began to develop in the room.