Anubis Speaks!: A Guide to the Afterlife by the Egyptian God of the Dead (25 page)

You may want to hold your nose because it reeks of rot in here and it’s only going to get worse. Isis, Serket, and Set leap off the boat—shining knives held aloft—and start slashing at Apophis. The goddesses of magic and scorpions, and the god of chaos are too much for the monster. With savage yells, they carve him into huge chunks of quivering reptile flesh. (A word of advice: Never—and I mean
never
—make our goddesses angry. I tell you this for your own good because they
will
cut you. And I mean that literally.) But even as Isis, Serket, and Set continue

chopping Apophis into sushi, there is more danger.

All of Egypt’s enemies—those who would try to hurt, invade, or conquer us—spring up out of the ground.

You might want to turn your head because we gods are about to decapitate them. We don’t play. We get the job done.

Okay, you can look now. The bouncing heads are a sight to see. Did you know that after decapitation the brain still works for about fifteen seconds? If the person was talking, their mouth will continue moving.

They may even continue blinking. Yeah, pleasant dreams, tonight.

Uh, oh. Apophis is beginning to regenerate!

Thankfully, a giant cat goddess enters the fray and helps Isis cut him into even smaller pieces with a super-sharp knife. This might be the only time I’m genuinely happy to see a cat.

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You may want to hold your nose because it reeks of rot in here and it’s only going to get worse. Isis, Serket, and Set leap off the boat—shining knives held aloft—and start slashing at Apophis. The goddesses of magic and scorpions and the god of chaos are too much for the monster. With savage yells, they carve him into huge chunks of quivering reptile flesh. (A word of advice: Never—and I mean
never
—make our goddesses angry. I tell you this for your own good because they
will
cut you. And I mean that literally.) But even as Isis, Serket, and Set continue

chopping Apophis into sushi, there is more danger.

All of Egypt’s enemies—those who would try to hurt, invade, or conquer us—spring up out of the ground.

You might want to turn your head because we gods are about to decapitate them. We don’t play. We get the job done.

Okay, you can look now. The bouncing heads are a sight to see. Did you know that after decapitation the brain still works for about fifteen seconds? If the person was talking, his mouth will continue moving.

He may even continue blinking. Yeah, pleasant dreams tonight.

Uh, oh. Apophis is beginning to regenerate!

Thankfully, a giant cat goddess enters the fray and helps Isis cut him into even smaller pieces with a super-sharp knife. This might be the only time I’m genuinely happy to see a cat.

71