An Officer but No Gentleman (28 page)

“Where were you when I was ten?” She force a small laugh, wondering if the men would have saved her if she fell in. She doubted it. It was why she struggled so hard to hold on. They would have been glad to see her gone.

She took a sip and continued the story while he took a seat in the ladder back chair behind her desk.

“I got so many ‘good jobs’ and ‘atta boys’ that I started volunteering for everything.  Soon I was up there reefing the sails with the rest of them.  I may not have been much help pulling in the anchor, but most of the time I held my own.  Unfortunately, I was still a boy among men and I didn’t fit in.”

“You were a girl among men,” Jaxon corrected.

Charlie shrugged, dismissing his correction out of hand. “When I was thirteen, I took my test to be an able seaman. Shortly after that was when Morty joined the crew.  He was seventeen, fresh from the farm and didn’t even know a sheepshank from a belaying pin.  I remembered what it was like to be the one polishing the brass, feeding the animals and cleaning their cages to be kept out of the way, so I took pity on him and taught him everything he needed to know. Morty doesn’t pick up new things easily, but with patience he can learn just about anything.  A few months later, when we got to port, he wanted me to go to shore with him and every time after that. And for the first time in my life, I had a friend.”  Charlie’s voice cracked and Jaxon saw her eyes were awash with tears.

“Oh, Charlie,” he said coming around to where she stood and gathered her up in his arms and held her.

“He wanted me to go to shore with him because he liked me, not because my father gave him money to keep me out of his way for the evening. And when Michel Dupre joined the crew and wanted to go to shore with Morty without me, Morty told Michel, he could come with us or he could go by himself.”

She looked into Jaxon’s eyes. “Morty didn’t let Michel come between our friendship.  But I let you.  And I don’t know how to make that up to him.  I love you so much
, but I love him too and I know I have to give up that friendship. After I became second mate, my father wouldn’t let us fraternize anymore so the night of our engagement party was the first time in three years we really got to go on the town together.”

Jaxon kissed the top of her head.  She loved Morty because he befriended her as a lonely child and was loyal to her.  Again she made him realize how much he took his childhood for granted.  He’d always had friends and siblings.  He couldn’t imagine never having a friend until his teenage years.  How lonely she must have felt to never have someone
, but her father to talk to.  And he got the distinct impression she couldn’t really talk to him either.  Until he was keelhauled, he didn’t have a sense of what loyalty was.  Or loneliness for that matter.  But even then, Jaxon had always had his family.

“There will be times when both ships with be home at the same time, Charlie. We’ll figure out a way for you to spend time with him.”

Charlie analyzed Jaxon’s face and when she knew he meant it, fat tears fell over her lashes.  “I know how hard that is for you, Jaxon.  Thank you.”

He kissed her forehead and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear.  “What time do you want me to come for you to walk you home?”

“I’m going to stay aboard until I can find a captain.  I’m the only officer.”

Jaxon frowned, the scar on his cheek turned white as the skin pulled downward. “I have extras,” he reminded her.

How could she tell him despite agreeing to marry him, the fact that he didn’t love her still cut her to the bone? “It’s my last days to spend on my ship and with my men,” she said.  She held up her father’s ring of keys.  “I’ll be able to lock the door tonight.  I’ll be safe.”

Jaxon was disappointed
, but he didn’t complain.  “Look what the bookseller delivered.”  It was the book about flowers he had ordered for her. As she opened it and reverently began thumbing through the pages, Jaxon looked around her cabin.  He was surprised at how sparse it was.  He would have thought anyone who had been around the world as many times as Charlie would have filled the room up with trinkets from her travels.

The books on her shelves were mostly old school books and a handful of novels.  Nothing he would expect a woman to read.  A large conch was the only thing remotely decorative.  Jaxon began opening the doors and drawers of the built-ins.   He found bed linens and towels, unmentionables, socks, a shaving kit, box of cigars, an open case of brandy.

“What are you looking for?”

“You,” he answered.  “I’m looking for you somewhere in this room.”

She understood what he meant.  She pulled the dressing robe with the silk lapels and sash out of the locker and put it on her desk, then she set a leaded glass decanter of brandy next to it.  Charlie opened a desk drawer and under the ledger was a long slender pouch.  She handed it to him.

Jaxon pulled at the draw string opening until it was opened enough for him to pull the contents out.  Inside was an intricately carved ivory fan.

“Yori gave it to me just before my father put him ashore.  I think he knew.”

He could understand the case of brandy.  If this was his life, he would need it
, too.  No wonder silk stockings made her cry.

Jaxon put the fan back into the pouch then gave her a kiss.  “I’ll meet you on deck,” he said.  He handed her the fan and left.

He was angry.  How could her father control her life like that?  Force her to live the lie? Even in the privacy of her own cabin, she was not allowed to be herself.

Jaxon’s mood showed on his face.  He found himself pacing the quarterdeck since it was the only place on deck where the men weren’t working.

Every member of the crew saw Jaxon and Charlie go below together and everyone saw him come back alone wearing a scowl fierce enough to scare grown men.  When Charlie returned topside, few missed she looked upset.  She spotted Jaxon on the quarterdeck, but waited to join him until she had supervised her men’s progress and gave them further instructions.  He stood at the railing looking aft when she approached.

Jaxon put his arm around her
, but didn’t say anything.

“Are you mad?  If it’s about the brandy….”

“It’s not about the brandy.”

“I’m not a drunk.”

“Damn it, Charlie!” Jaxon raised his voice then lowered it.  “It’s not about the damn brandy.”

Charlie pulled away from him.  “So this is about the fact that I didn’t have a childhood like yours.  Well, who care?  Stop feeling sorry for me.  I’ve been to places where people are so poor their children starve to death, places where blind children beg on the streets and people walk by them without even noticing them.  I’ve seen a slave boy whose back was scarred from whipping.  I’ve passed by brothels were
young girls worked as whores.

“I have never gone to bed hungry
,” she continued, “and I can count the times my father took a belt to me on one hand.  He dressed me like this to protect me not to punish me.  So what if I never had a doll or learned the things girls know?”

“Did you ever have any toys, Charlie?  A top, a wooden sword or a toy boat?  Anything?”

“I had a real sword and a real boat.  I didn’t have time for toys.”  Charlie turned on her heel.  “I’m going to check the repairs.  If you’ll excuse me.”

“Charlie.” He put his hand on her arm.

“Jax, this is one of those times you just need to let me go.  As a matter of fact, why don’t you go home?”

32

Daniel folded his arms across his chest.  Jaxon was snapping at everyone again today.  Three days had gone by and neither Jaxon nor Charlie seemed to be willing to traverse to short distance between their ships to be with each other.  Daniel was thankful that Jaxon was at least spending his nights at home.

“Charlie hasn’t come home yet?” Daniel asked knowing the answer.

“She says she’s staying on the ship until she hires a new captain.”  Jaxon could see her as she sat on the edge of the quarterdeck talking to Morty.  Once they had gotten the
Arcadia
back in order, he thought she would at least come home overnight, but she had not left the ship in days and he could see from the deck of
The Dragon’s Lair
that during the day, she rarely went below even when there was barely enough work for the skeleton crew to keep busy.  The rest of the time, she spent sitting on the edge of the quarterdeck talking to Morty who usually sat a couple of feet away.

He had seen her go below deck with a couple of captain applicants
, but she was always frowning when they came back up.

“Daniel, find Romy and Levi and bring them to my quarters.”

“You want us to kidnap her?”

Jaxon was incredulous.  “Of course not.”

“Beat up Morty?”

“Just do what you’re told.”

“Aye-aye, skipper,” he said impertinently.

Jaxon sat at his desk and had just finished counting out three separate piles of money when Daniel knocked and stuck his head in.

“Come in.”

Daniel and Romy took their places across the desk from Jaxon and Levi plopped down on his bunk.

Jaxon scowled at him.  “Get off my bunk and go stand next to Daniel and Romy.”  Jaxon picked up two stacks of coins and came around the desk.  He handed the largest sum to Daniel and the other to Romy.  Then he turned and picked up the small stack of coins and handed it to Levi.  He addressed Levi first.

“Mother is really shaken by what happened to Jimmy.  I think she would be much happier with you off my ship.  If you’re sure you want to pursue this line of work, I believe the
Arcadia
has openings.”

“The
Arcadia
?  It’s a merchant ship.” Levi protested.

“Exactly.”

“It only has one cannon, Jax.  We would be nearly defenseless.”

“Charlie intends to send her to Asia.  But if you are under attack, aim for the waterline.  Sink the bastards.”

Jaxon turned to Daniel next.  “I’m sure you won’t have far to go to find employment.  Think of this as an opportunity to better yourself.”

Daniel narrowed his eyes at Jaxon.  “You want me to apply for her captain’s job?”

“Aye.”  Jaxon smiled.  His brother wasn’t slow.

“What about our shares from the corsair and the others?”

“When I get it, so will you.”

“I can’t believe you’re firing us.  This is because of what happened with Charlie.”

“Aye, I don’t deny it.”

Daniel shook his head, a wry smile on his lips and dimples on his cheeks.  “Fired for following your orders.”

“Romy, I’m sorry.  I could tell the other day how uncomfortable Charlie was around you, but I’m guessing if she hires Daniel, he’ll hire you.”

“And what if she doesn’t hire me?” Daniel asked.

“I guess you should have been nicer to her.  However, I know her fiancé, maybe he can put in a good word with her.”

Jaxon’s mood was lifting.  He felt content for the first time in days.  “I feel like lunch at the hotel today.  Anyone want to join me?  I’m paying.”

Charlie saw Jax approached the ship and her heart began a rapid tattoo in her chest. She was hurt that not once in the last three days had he so much as waved at her from his own ship. He made no secret of the fact he would visually seek her out, but not once did he acknowledge her.

“Charlie!” Jaxon shouted from the pier. “Hungry?”

Charlie was not accustomed to eating a midday meal. “I just ate breakfast four hours ago.”

“We’re going to have lunch at the hotel. Would you like to join us?”

“No, thanks.”

“What about you, Morty. Are you hungry?”

“I could eat,” he said sliding his rump off the quarterdeck.

“Come on, Charlie. Just come with us. You don’t have to eat.”

“Traitor,” she said quietly to Morty.

“Morty, talk her into it.”

“When she was a kid, I used to throw Charlie over my shoulder when he was being stubborn.”

Charlie squinted at Morty.  “Don’t even think about it.”

“No, she a grown woman,” Jaxon reminded him.

Jaxon began moving up the gangplank.  “I have something important to talk to you about.  Permission to come aboard?”

“Unless you have a captain for me to hire in your pocket….”

Jaxon smiled at her.  “He won’t quite fit in my pocket.”

“Truly?  You know someone?”  Charlie felt her mood soar at the sight of Jaxon.  Languid warmth grew inside her making it impossible to sit
still.  How was it possible just gazing upon him still made her knees weak?

“Come to lunch.”

A moment later, Charlie was on her feet and the three of them were walking down the pier towards their dining companions.  Jaxon had taken her hand and knew the moment she realized who they were dining with.

“Come on, baby.  I’m trying to make this b
etter,” he said quietly to her. “Trust me.”

She glanced at him as if he were mad.  How could having lunch with the three men who had stripped her possibly make anything better?  It was bad enough she wouldn’t be able to avoid them altogether once she was back on
The Dragon’s Lair,
but to be forced to eat at a table with all three of them was going to be humiliating.

She pulled her hand free of his and folded her arms across her chest.

“Lead the way,” he said to Daniel.

As they walked, Jaxon leaned towards Charlie.  “I’ve missed you,” he said quietly into her ear.

“You knew where I was,” she said peevishly. “All you had to do was come to the ship.”

“You were pretty mad at me.”

“It doesn’t take three days for me to calm down,” she said coolly.

“Really?  Because it seems to me you’re still mad.”

“I’m mad because you came to your ship every day, and you couldn’t walk a few more feet to mine to say hello.  And when you finally do, you ask me to go eat...”  She dropped her voice to a whisper.  “…with them.”

They walked another block before Jaxon tried to talk to her again.

“Not having any luck in your search for a captain?”

“I’ve interviewed three men.  As soon as I corrected them that I’m
Miss
Sinclair not Mister they change completely.  One, the only one who deserves any respect, told me outright that he wouldn’t work for a woman.  The next one treated me like I was an imbecile or a child and started explaining the shipping business to me.  The third tried to swindle me.  According to him, the owner’s percentage is only twenty percent. I’m supposed to let him use my ship, front the money for the cargo, pay him a wage and a percentage and Dr. Kirk and I are going to split twenty percent.  Can you imagine?”

“Well, the man I have in mind already knows you’re a member of the fairer sex.  He’s an honest and moral man.”

“Does he have references?”

“I’ll vouch for him.”

“Experience?”

“Like you, he has family ties to the shipping industry.  He spent his summers as a child on his grandfather’s ship and went to sea after completing school.  The only drawback is this will be his first captaincy.”

He saw Charlie’s shoulders drop in disappointment.  “I was really hoping for someone with experience.”

“He’s ready.”

“This is a big decision, Jax.  Would you trust this man with your ship?”

“He just spent the last two weeks in charge of my ship and he’s been in charge of our captured vessels before as well.”

“Daniel?  You’re talking about Daniel?”

The man in question turned and flashed his dimples at her.  “I really need this job.  I just got fired.”

Charlie looked at Jaxon in astonishment.  “You fired your own brother?”

“
Both
his brothers,” Levi interrupted.

“And me,” Romy said.

Charlie looked at Jaxon wide-eyed.  She mouthed the words ‘thank you’ to him, unfolded her arms and slipped her hand into his.  He gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

“Daniel?  Hmm.  Well, at least I would know my ship will always come back here.”

“Aye.”

As they arrived at the hotel
, the men stopped at the slate menu board just outside the entrance.  Written in chalk was the day’s fare.

“I can’t decide between the steak and the chicken,” Daniel said.

“I was thinking the flounder or the sea bass sound good,” Levi said.

“Well, I had the pot roast a couple of days ago so I don’t want that.  I’m leaning toward either the sausages or the meat pie.”

It wasn’t until the three brothers all ordered different things, she realized that they were trying to be subtle about what was on the board so that Romy would not be embarrassed over the fact that he could not read the board himself. 

They had barely been seated when a familiar female voice called out to Captain Bloodworthy.  Jaxon immediately turned to find the dressmaker’s assistant, Mabel, approaching the table.
              “I’m sorry to interrupt.  I saw you come in from down the street,” Mabel said quietly.  “It’s just that Miss Sinclair missed her fitting and I’m not going to be able to get the wedding dress finished in time if I can’t get back to work on it.”

Charlie realized Mabel had not recognized her sitting next to Jaxon dressed in her uniform.

“I’m here, Mabel.”

“Oh my.  I-I didn’t see you.”

Charlie knew Mabel had never seen her dressed in breeches before and was rather rattled by it.

“I’m sorry.  I’ve been so busy with my ship, I completely forgot.”

“She’ll be there after lunch,” Jaxon promised.  “Would you care to join us?”

“Oh
, no, sir.  I just saw you come in.”

“Yes, Mabel, please stay.  I never get to talk to women,” Charlie said hoping she could avoid talking to any of the men from Jaxon’s ship. 

“Levi, slide down so Miss Mabel can sit across from Charlie.”

Romy got up and grabbed an empty chair from another table and set it at the end of the table to make room.  The three brothers stood up in unison and Levi held his former chair for her as she took her seat between Levi and Daniel.

“Have you met my brothers, Miss Mabel, Daniel and Levi?  The man on the end is Romy.”

She greeted each man as they were introduced.

“And the gentleman sitting next to Charlie is Morty.”

“Yes, I saw you at the party the other night
, but you didn’t stay long enough for us to meet,” Mabel said smiling at Morty.

Morty didn’t know what to say.  It had been years since he needed to make conversation with a nice girl
and a beautiful fire-headed maiden at that. “Aye, I didn’t stay long.”

“It’s a shame
you could not have stayed longer.  There weren’t enough men to dance with.  I had my hopes up when I saw the pair of you walk in.”

“It’s probably just as well.  I probably would have stomped on your feet and you’d be cursin’ my very existence today.”

Mabel covered her mouth as she laughed aloud.

“Morty!” Charlie chided.  “Miss Mabel is not the sort of lady who curses.”

“She would be after dancing with me.”

Everyone laughed including Jaxon.  Charlie elbowed Jaxon softly and gave him a knowing look.

“Oh, I just remembered,” Jax said suddenly.  “I have important business to attend to this afternoon.  Morty can you escort Charlie to her fitting.”

“Me?”

“Aye.  Just walk her there and walk her home afterwards.  There a chair in the shop where you can sit while you wait.  You are coming home now that we found you a captain, aren’t you?”

“She hasn’t hired me yet, Jax.”

Jax and Daniel looked expectantly at Charlie.

“Aye, you’re hired,
Captain
Bloodworthy.”

“Oh my,” Mabel said.
“Two Captain Bloodworthys.  Congratulation Captain.”

Daniel flashed his dimples.
“It sounds so much better connected to my name, wouldn’t you say?”

Jaxon just shook his head.