31 Days of Winter (38 page)

‘That rules out dialysis as well then. Has he got
kids? Maybe he only gets to see them for a couple of hours each afternoon.’

‘You know I don’t think I’ve asked. I asked if he
wanted a family and he said no, but I didn’t ask if he already had one.’

‘Shit. He doesn’t want kids?’

‘No, why?’

‘Ermmm, hello! The man you’re in love with doesn’t
want kids and you want them desperately, that’s not a good sign.’

‘Trust me, there are plenty of other “not good”
signs Brooke, without adding kids to the mix. Why can’t I switch off how I
feel? He can be such an arse sometimes, but other times I just fall for him so
hard,’ I groaned as I covered my eyes.

‘O, I wish you were here so I could cuddle you and
we could get pissed.’

‘Me too,’ I nodded. ‘Shit, he’s coming back so
please
be on your best behaviour.’

‘I’m insulted at the insinuation that I’m anything
less than well behaved and discreet,’ she gasped. I rolled my eyes again and
looked up as Dan walked through the door with a small wrapped gift in his hand.

‘Sorry, am I interrupting?’ he frowned.

‘It’s just my best friend Brooke,’ I smiled.

‘Oi!’ she yelled. ‘What do you mean “just” my best
friend?’

‘Sorry, Brooke. Dan, it’s my amazing best friend
Brooke. Would you like to say hello?’

‘Hello, Brooke,’ he called as he strode over and
lowered his large frame down onto the sofa next to me.

‘Hello mysterious, Dan. Am I allowed to see you?
After all, I’ve heard so much about you.’

‘Really?’ he smirked at the same time as I snapped
‘Brooke!’ in protest.

‘Well, I have!’ she objected pulling her tongue
out at me. ‘Do you work for MI5?’

‘No,’ he laughed. ‘Why would you have thought
that?’

‘You’re so mysterious, we’ve been running through
lists of where you go every day.’

‘Brooke,’ I sighed, putting a hand over my
embarrassed face. I heard a noise and looked up to see Dan disappearing into
the cloakroom. ‘Great, now you’ve made him retreat by pushing.’

‘I wasn’t pushing!’ she pouted.

‘For you maybe not, for him you’re pushy. You push
it, just like Salt-n-Pepa. Ah push it, P.Push it real good,’ I sang with the
dance moves making her laugh.

‘Where’s he retreated?’ she asked, and I giggled
as I saw her craning her neck as if it would give her a better view.

‘The utility room. I told you he doesn’t like
personal questions, let alone from someone whose face he hasn’t even seen.’

‘You sure pick them, Ellie.’’

‘I sure do. I’d better go, I have a turkey to
baste and a complex Dan to chill out again. Can’t wait to see you, and did I
tell you that I’ve asked the agents if you can have the key on the Saturday
morning? Anyway, I’m still waiting for them to come back to me.’

‘Well I’ve pencilled the weekend out, I can’t wait
to see you either.’

‘You never said how it went with the whole Steve
and Molly situation.’

‘Shit,’ she exclaimed as she looked behind her. ‘Mum’s
calling me, it’s stuffing time.’

‘What?’ I laughed.

‘She needs to put a beaten egg in the stuffing and
with her phobia of cardboard egg boxes she can’t get one out, Brooke to the
rescue.’

‘You really should be given a cape for such heavy
responsibility,’ I teased.

‘Shit, she’s yelling again. Got to go, babe. I’ll send
you an email to sort a catch up tomorrow or the day after ok? Just go and fuck
him already, you look stressed.’

‘Bye, Brooke,’ I laughed. ‘Love you.’

‘You too, babe.’ She blew me a kiss and signed
off, leaving me feeling even more homesick. I went to check the turkey, given
the amount Dan ate, I’d purchased a huge one which needed plenty of time on
low.

‘Fuck.’

‘What’s wrong?’ I exclaimed as I shut the oven
door, straightened up and looked around at him.

‘Don’t bend over like that in front of me in a
tiny dress. You look seriously hot.’

‘Thanks,’ I blushed. ‘You ok? Sorry about Brooke,
she doesn’t apply filters when she talks.’

‘I’m a private person Ellie, I don’t want every
Tom, Dick, and Harry knowing my business.’

‘She’s my best friend, and it’s not like I could
tell her your “business” as I don’t exactly know a lot about you, do I?’ I
poured myself another glass of Champagne.

‘Can I have some too?’

‘Sorry, I thought with you driving in a while you
wouldn’t want any more, you’re quite controlled with your drinking.’

‘I won’t be going out, it’s starting to thaw and I
don’t want to risk walking across the ice.’

‘I’m sorry you’re going to miss your … thing, but
I won’t complain that I get to have some company for the rest of the
afternoon.’ I poured him a glass and pushed it across the island.
Why
wouldn’t he just tell me what it was he was missing?
He looked really
troubled about it.

‘Thanks.’ He shot me a quick smile and headed back
to the lounge.

‘Do you want to talk about it?’ I asked hesitantly
as I headed over.

‘About what?’

‘Why you look so down.’

‘Not really. Sorry, I don’t want to ruin your
day.’

‘You’d only ruin my day if you left me alone for
all of it,’ I instinctively reached down and ran my hand through his hair, just
like I used to with Zac when he was feeling low. Dan tensed up immediately and
I snatched my hand back. ‘Would you like your present?’

‘I have a present? When have you had time to do
any shopping?’

‘The day you took me into the town for my tests.
They’re only stupid things as you’re not exactly forthcoming about what you do
or what you like, and I only just met you.’ This time he looked up and smiled.
I headed to the tree and pulled his small packages out and sat next to him and
passed them over.

‘I can’t believe you got me something. I mean …
I’m just the help and you’re cooking for me, being nice to me when sometimes
I’m an arsehole like your ex and …’ he broke off and looked at me with a pained
expression.

‘You’re not just the help, you’re my friend. A
pain in the arse? Well yes, you are one a considerable amount of the time, but
sometimes you can be so sweet.’ I patted his knee and he grabbed my hand and
squeezed it. I felt my entire body tremble, my physical reaction to him was
unprecedented.

‘Are you cold? You’re shaking.’

‘I’m fine,’ I smiled and pulled my hand back. ‘So,
are you going to open it or not?’

‘Ladies first.’ He passed me the gift that looked
like it had been professionally wrapped and I mentally kicked myself for being
happy that he’d written the tag “Ellie, Happy Christmas, Love Dan x”.
How
sad was I, being happy over the word “love” and a kiss on a tag?
Like a
damn teenager with a crush. I looked at him surprised to see a Pandora box and
carefully opened it, to find a silver essence bangle, complete with charms
spelling out my name, and a
bear?
‘Dan, I don’t know what to say. This
is …’

‘You don’t like it. I’m a bit out of touch with
buying gifts.’

‘No, I love it,’ I nodded. ‘Why the polar bear
though?’

‘I couldn’t find a grizzly bear which I thought
would remind you of your stay here, and I figured I can be like a bear with a
sore head,’ he shrugged. I laughed and slipped it over my hand. I loved it, but
it wasn’t like I’d ever forget my time up here with my mercurial, half
Brazilian, incredible sexy super model.

‘It’s really beautiful and thoughtful, Dan. This
must have cost you a lot of money, you didn’t need to go to all this trouble.’

‘It’s the least I can do after you’ve cooked for
me, played nurse and put up with me. Especially with me not being open with you,
and it’s not like I’m a big spender living out here, is it?’

‘I guess not, but I really appreciate the gesture,’
I smiled. I leaned in and kissed his cheek again and heard him take a deep
calming breath. ‘I feel kind of cheap now with your gifts. I didn’t really know
anything about you when I got them, actually I still don’t know that much about
you.’

‘You know me better than most people do, Ellie
Baxter,’ he advised as he opened his parcel. He laughed as he found the Werther’s
Originals boiled sweets. ‘See, I can count the number of people who know my
favourite sweet on one hand.’

‘Well if you’re so happy with those, I’ll take the
rest of the presents back,’ I teased.

‘No,’ he laughed as he unwrapped his hat, scarf
and gloves. ‘These are really nice, thank you.’

‘You hate them.’

‘No, they’re great. You may not have noticed but
it can get kind of cold up here in winter. I’m really touched, they’re really
thoughtful too. Thank you.’ He reached up and held my cheek as his thumb swept
over my lower lip and my breathing hitched. His pupils had dilated and his
breathing was faster. He was going to kiss me, I could sense it, I wanted it so
badly … but I couldn’t let him cross the line again, we’d both end up feeling
worse after. I stood up quickly and strode over to the kitchen, marvelling at
my self-control given all I wanted to do was throw myself at him and force him
to fuck me. ‘Can I do anything to help?’ he called.

‘No you’re fine, I’ll just put the vegetables in
to roast. Why don’t you set up that Backgammon set again. I promised to whoop
your arse.’

We played again for a few hours, me sulking that
he was beating me overall. I was just removing the turkey and getting ready to
carve when I jumped, startled at an almighty racket above me, then a crashing
noise as piles of snow cascaded off the roof in an avalanche and all the lights
went out.

‘Shit,’ exclaimed Dan. ‘I hope it’s just a tripped
fuse or that snow has just taken out the electricity cable.’

‘No, seriously?’

‘Stay there, I’ll check the fuse box.’

‘With what? Do you have any candles?’ I asked, it
was already turning dark.

‘I have a small torch on my key ring,’ he advised
as he turned it on and disappeared into the utility room. I heard him swear
before he reappeared. ‘Sorry, either our cable is down or it’s one on the
shore. I doubt anyone will come out on Christmas Day to fix it.’

‘That’s ok, thank God dinner was already cooked.
If you have some candles we can eat now anyway.’

‘No candles, sorry.’

‘Actually, we do have some. I got some Yankee
Candle ones that I forgot about from the Christmas shop. They’re on the
mantelpiece. If you can light them and bring them here I can serve up.’ Great,
this was all I needed. Now we were going to have a romantic cosy candlelit Christmas
dinner? I took over the carving, as he was making a complete mess of it, which
made me laugh and him sulk. I tried to focus on my food, but all I wanted to
taste was Dan. This was getting unbearable. I wondered about faking a migraine
to get out of spending the rest of the evening with him, but that would be unfair
on him. I really believed it was doing him good to have company. I wondered how
often he had friends over, if he even had any other than the owner.

‘That was amazing Ellie, you’re such a talented
cook.’

‘Well, anything would be better than you eating Pot
Noodle or a sandwich for Christmas.’

‘I’d have splashed out and microwaved a couple of
ready meals. Seriously, I don’t think even my mum cooks that well.’

‘Well, unbelievably with your appetite, there’s
still leftovers that I can plate up for you for tomorrow. We have nibbles for
later if you’re hungry.’

‘We need to think about moving.’

‘What?’

‘You can’t stay here, with the electricity out
there’s no central heating and the house is too big to keep warm from the two
fires. I left the boathouse wood burner going, so it will be warm down there.
Pack up what you think we need food wise and an overnight kit and I’ll take
them down in a few trips.’

‘You expect me to stay there overnight?’ I gasped,
looking at his dimly lit face with horror.

‘What’s the problem?’

‘You only have one bed.’

‘And? We shared a bed last night,’ he reminded me.

‘I know, but …’ I gulped. Could this day get any more
difficult? I always felt emotional and vulnerable at Christmas without my
parents, I was missing Brooke and I was seriously horny after my period,
without the temptation of now sharing a small confined space and a bed with
Hercules.

‘No arguing. You’ll freeze up here,’ he stated in
a firm tone.

‘All part of the service?’

‘It certainly is. If it makes you feel better I’ll
take the sofa.’

‘Don’t be ridiculous, you’re … seven foot
something and the sofa’s about three foot.’

‘Six foot five,’ he chuckled.

‘Still more than half the length of the sofa. I’ll
take it.’

‘You’re nearly six foot yourself.’

‘Five eleven, like your mum,’ I reminded him.

‘Close enough. Why don’t we argue about it later?
Start packing up,’ he ordered.

After about four trips with food and a bag of my
overnight kit, he piggy backed me down to the boathouse. I breathed him in as I
clung to him, he smelled deliciously masculine. I was so tempted to kiss his
neck.

‘Are you sniffing me, Miss Baxter?’

‘No,’ I mumbled, enjoying the feel of his firm
chest under my arms, my legs wrapped around his slim waist. I was having
visuals of facing him like this as he thrust into me against the tiled shower
wall, and let out a happy sigh as I closed my eyes and rested my cheek on his
shoulder. How had he gotten to me so badly? Three weeks ago I didn’t even know
he existed, yet now he was all that I could think about. I heard him chuckle
again at my pitiful attempt to make out that I wasn’t affected by him, as I
listened to the crunching sound of the frosty snow under his feet. I smiled as
I heard my new bracelet jangling, I loved it and it would be nice to have a
concrete reminder of my time here with him.