WidowsWalk (5 page)

A couple of partners had almost made him rethink his selfish
ways. But in the end he realized he could not give them what they needed. The
call of saltwater was too strong. For some reason it made him think of Lindy
again. Pulling his BlackBerry from his pocket, he shook his head and laughed
before his thumbs began to move.

My Very Dear Lindy,

It was with great relish that I read your note. To know
that you are thinking of me brightens the long, lonely days at sea. I am in
Palma sitting in the afternoon sun at my favorite café. The fish is so fresh
that you can taste the desire of the ocean. You would like it here. I should
like for you to see it someday. As I sip my glass of Rioja I am remembering the
sweet taste of your kiss. (Maybe I could be a writer too?) I look forward to
our next meeting.

My Deep Desire and Affection,

Tom

Tom chuckled softly before pressing Send. For the first time
he was anxious for his return to Cornwall. He kept busy himself, occupied with
his business interests but the days seemed longer than normal and he was glad
that he would be headed back soon.

He headed over to the marina to check on the report from the
mechanics. There had been a slight hitch in the engine on the trip over and he
hoped it wouldn’t have to be replaced. It wasn’t so much the cost of a new
motor but the disruption to his schedule.

His crew engineer had both good and bad news. The problem
could be repaired but the required part had to come from the States and wouldn’t
arrive for another two weeks.
That’s the price I pay for a Caribbean bargain-buy.

The big boat had been a repossession, one of many in a glut
following the banking crash and no one had wanted to sail it across the
Atlantic. Tom was anxious to get back to see Lindy, but it was his
responsibility as ship’s captain to take care of the vessel so he would have to
wait.

After making arrangements for the small group of passengers
and his crew to fly back to the UK with a friend’s airline charter business he
gave the go-ahead for the part order and settled back into his favorite hotel
for the wait.
Always something to do in sunny Spain.

His heavy lunch and the afternoon sun were making him sleepy
and he stretched out on the antique iron bed. His body was relaxed but his
brain would not stop spinning. Somewhere between lucidity and dreams Lindy
floated into his vision.

He saw her standing on the beach, the early-morning sun
shining on her hair. The diaphanous gown clung to her breasts and thighs in the
soft breeze. He could see just a hint of her rosy nipples as they peaked
against the silky fabric. Reaching out, she beckoned him to her side.

Even in his fantasy Tom waged the war between moving closer
and holding back. On one hand he took immense pleasure in just watching her. He
wished he could somehow make her believe how beautiful she was. He knew that
somewhere inside she was aware of it but it was difficult for her to believe it
for more than a brief moment. As confident as she was, he wondered where the
insecurity came from.

Just a daydream, Tom? Go to her. Hold her hand for a
little while. Walk with her in the sunshine. What could it hurt? Maybe if you’re
lucky she pull you down into the warm sand and give you another chance to prove
you are a man.

* * * * *

Lindy’s laughter tinkled on the breeze as she read Tom’s
letter. He did seem to have a way with words. Maybe writing letters was how to
get him to express himself. She had thought about the things he had said when
they were together last and wondered what his issue really was. She knew she
was thinking about him entirely too much.

She worked on the house and the letters but it was her novel
that took most of her time. She knew her motivation lay directly in her
feelings for Tom—who wouldn’t want to write about love and romance when they
had a handsome sea captain worshipping their body? Well no sense in knocking it.
At least she was being productive.

She tried not to count the days until Tom’s return but it
was difficult—especially when darkness closed in and she lay in the big brass
bed listening to the gentle waves washing up against the shore.

Trying to fight the urge, she picked up the phone once
again. She knew he would be home soon but she had not heard a word from him in a
couple of days. Sometimes he would text and email several times in one day. Other
times there was silence for several days.

She was glad they had the connection when they did. It was
helping her to know him even though they couldn’t be together. She tried to
hold back from contacting him but it was a struggle. She had sent a brief “checking
in” message but nothing that required a response.

He was a man so she hoped for but did not expect a reply.
Maybe he had changed his mind about her already. Maybe he found a hot Spanish
woman to warm his bed and decided to stay on. Lindy often imagined him in
flagrante delicto with one beauty or another. He as much as told her it was
true, hadn’t he? And why not? He was young, single and incredibly handsome.

She could only hope she didn’t hear from him again. She was
in way over her head. She told herself she could handle it, it was just for fun
but she knew she was lying to herself.
Well I can do whatever I want if it
doesn’t matter.
She picked up her phone and began to type.

My Dearest Tom,

I read your lovely response with a smile. You do have the
soul of a poet, my darling. Palma sounds magnificent and I too should love to
visit one day. To feel the heat of the sun on my skin, taste the piquant spices
on your tongue and hold your hand in the darkness as the rhythm of the flamenco
guitars beat within my chest would fill me with such delight. I look forward to
your return so that you might fill me with tales of faraway lands. Hurry.

Lindy xxoo

Lindy reread the message trying to convince herself it was
okay to press
Send. A little thinly disguised innuendo to arouse his curiosity couldn’t hurt,
could it? What man didn’t want to think a woman wanted to have sex with him?
Pulling the quilt over her shoulders, she snuggled deeper into the bed, trying
to remember the feel of his arms around her and the taste of him on her tongue.

Morning brought a choice—wait and worry or not. Putting her
vivid imagination to work instead of letting it drive her crazy with doubt, she
made great progress on her book. Occasionally she looked up from her table on
the porch and searched the stretch of golden sand to Tom’s house, waiting for
movement that might signal his return. She thought about taking a walk by and
chancing a meeting with his sister again but thought it might make her look like
an obsessed stalker and that just wasn’t her style.

Pulling the box from under her bed, she carefully lifted a
stack of letters from the pile. If Emmaline and Benjamin could survive months
apart, then a few more days shouldn’t be too much for her to bear.

Buck up, Lindy! You have gone years without anyone in
your life and been happy. Don’t let the distance create a false sense of
paranoia. Just enjoy the build of the relationship—if there is one.

My Dearest Emmaline,

I can only apologize for the delay in my return. We have
made port in India. A storm caused damage to the ship and we needed to make
repairs before continuing on. What a strange and beautiful land this is. I know
that you too would find it fascinating. The British presence here is strong and
there are tastes of home around every corner, but the living conditions of the
native heathens are still somewhat primitive. I can see why there is great need
here for our sensible British nature. My dearest Emmaline, I ask you to
consider making our life together under the crown of our Queen in the British
Raj. I will of course bow to your wishes but I do believe you would be happy
here.

Yours Forever,

Benjamin

Well, this is interesting. I don’t recall any mention of
Emmaline going to India.

My Dearest Benjamin,

It would appear that a new mistress, India, has captured
your heart as much as the sea once did. I must wonder though if now I have
dropped to third on your list of loves in your life. I am glad you made it
safely to port and are able to enjoy the time during your delay. My darling, I
would be happy in the very depths of Hades as long as you were by my side. We
will have time when you return to discuss the details more carefully. I ask you
to be prepared to disclose your full intentions regarding our future. I look
forward to your imminent return. So many days have passed since I have felt the
warmth of your hand in mine and the softness of your sweet lips against my
cheek. I will wait for you but am no longer able to be patient. Please hurry
back to me.

Yours forever,

Em

Lindy smiled, remembering her last note to Tom asking him to
hurry. Seems she and her aunt might have had more in common than she once
thought. Carefully placing the letter back on the stack, she closed her eyes
and tried to imagine leaving her own country for the love of a man.

Her romantic nature immediately thought of course, anything
to be together—but Emmaline seemed a little more sensible, like Lindy. Now she
was beginning to wonder if she ever did go.

Anxious but dreading the answer she already knew, Lindy just
stared at the letters, willing them to magically contain different information.
Her thoughts drifted to Tom and she wondered what he was doing. Lost in her
daydream, the pixie-dust tinkle of her phone alerted her that she had a
message.

She stared at the blinking green light trying to convince
herself she wouldn’t be disappointed if it wasn’t from him—but she knew she
would be. So why wait? As she touched the small envelope icon his message
splashed into view.

My Sweet Woman,

I have played your message through my head several times,
your words enticing me with their heat and desire. Unfortunately the hurry part
is the issue. A problem with the ship’s engine requires me to stay in Palma for
at least another two weeks. You have been on my mind a great deal, Lindy. I ask
you to consider joining me here. I am free to relax and would love to show you
all the beautiful things that make this my favorite place in the world. Please
say you will? I look forward to your response.

Tom

Lindy could not believe it. Was he really inviting her to Spain?
She had never been before and to visit his favorite place with him was more
than she could have hoped for. Pacing the length of the porch, she questioned
herself relentlessly. What did she want? What did he want? Did it really mean
anything to a man like Tom?

Should I go?
Waving her hands frantically and
growling with anxious sounds of delight, she laughed out loud, thinking of the
picture she presented to anyone walking down the beach. She already knew she
would say yes so this was purely an exercise in time-wasting. She liked it
though—it was a chance to let the excitement build. Since she really had no one
to share it with and the cost of overseas calls was exorbitant, she continued
to talk to herself until she was sure what to say.

I am a writer, after all. How difficult could this be?

She picked up her cell phone, holding it firmly in her grip.
Her hand began to tremble.

Hi, Tom,

What a surprise! I would love to visit Palma with you as
my tour guide. I will look into the details and let you know my proposed
itinerary within the next couple of days.

Lindy xxoo

Lindy held her index finger over the Send button for what
seemed like an eternity. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to go. It was just that
she knew if she did, her well-ordered life might never be the same. Lindy
pressed Send, hoping her response sounded much more casual than she felt.

Tossing her phone on the pillow, she flopped facedown on the
bed.
Oh my God I can’t believe I am going to Palma to see Tom! This is
insane.

Kicking her legs and pounding her fists, she squealed with
unconfined joy. She knew it was a little crazy but she wanted to be with him,
so why not? The practical side of her nature was reminding her to think about
it carefully. She shouldn’t take off on a whim. Sure, Tom was a big boy but the
feelings of another human being were involved here.

Maybe he did this with all of them, she reasoned. All those
women…this was probably no big deal to him.

It’s just a few days and he needs something to help pass
the time. Maybe I should be offended rather than pleased. If he needs a
distraction, I am sure he can find someone there. Lindy! For crying out loud
just go and have fun. Everything does not have to be analyzed to death. Life is
a series of adventures and you are long overdue for a journey. You’re brave—or
would your grandmother say you’re being bold in the voice she reserved for “other”
girls
?

Lindy shook her head, laughing. She was a mature, independent
woman and she needed to pack. A shopping trip might be in order first, she
thought as her calm returned.
Where on earth would I find a lingerie store
in this small village?

The sound of her phone startled her. Unknown caller. She
knew it might be a wrong number but her heart skipped a beat just the same.

“Hello, “she said shakily.

“Hello, Lindy.” Tom’s voiced melted her resolve as it
trickled into her ear.

“Tom, hi—uh, how—um, are you?” Lindy stuttered through her
words, trying to get a grip.

“I am fine. Don’t be nervous, Lindy.”

“I’m not nervous—just surprised to hear your voice.”

“I thought it would be easier than texting the arrangements.”

“I have to admit I haven’t had time to check into it yet.”
Her voice shook.

“You haven’t changed your mind, have you?”

“No, it’s just—well it’s only been a few hours.”

“I know. I am teasing you, love,” he said warmly.

“Oh right, sorry.” She wondered if the “love” thing was just
a British standby or it meant something more. It had surprised her to hear
people calling each other “my lover” in the village post office.

“Listen, I know it is short notice but I have a friend who
runs a charter flight business. He has a flight into Palma on Saturday and I
have made arrangements for a seat for you.”

“Saturday! That’s the day after tomorrow. I am not sure I’ll
be ready.”

“Lindy, toss a bathing suit and toothbrush in your purse and
you’ll be ready. I want to show you all the sensual delights Palma has to
offer.”

“Oh Tom,” she practically moaned.” I don’t know that I will
ever be ready for that.”

“Well, Lindy, it is time you were. Don’t worry, I’ll go easy
on you. At first…”

Lindy could feel the moisture pooling at the opening of her
core as the pressure began to build. She held her breath, thinking if he didn’t
stop talking like that she might actually come. Just from his voice without any
details.
Good Lord, girl, you are out of control.

“Lindy, are you still there?”

“Yes of course, Tom. I was just…”

The sound of Tom’s velvety chuckle rang through the phone
and Lindy knew the shudder of her breath that followed was loud and clear on
his end.

“Breathe and relax, girl. I would like you to arrive in one
piece.”

“I will. I’ll be fine, Tom. Thank you.” She pulled her
patrician New England manner out of her ass along with her head. She wasn’t
about to give up control that easily.

“Of course, Belinda. My sister will drive you to the New Quay
airstrip. She’ll pick you up at 10:00 a.m. Saturday morning. I will be waiting
for you when you arrive—all right?”

“All right then.” Lindy giggled. “See you soon, Tom.”

“See you. Oh, and Lindy?”

“Yes, Tom?”

“Leave your inhibitions at home. You won’t need them here.”

Lindy’s sharp intake of breath was her only response before
she heard the line go dead.

Well, I never.
She was a bit agitated with his
arrogance. Maybe she “never” had—but perhaps he was right and it was time she
did. Arrogance might not always be the kindest of qualities but it made its
purpose known in the cleanest and often quickest of ways. That appealed to Lindy’s
practical nature.

* * * * *

Lindy felt a bit awkward riding to the airstrip with Sarah.
She wondered how many times his sister had managed Tom’s women. She tried to
keep the conversation light and Sarah seemed genuinely pleased that Tom had
invited Lindy on the trip. The plane was cozy but looked to be brand new, a
pretty little ten-seat, twin-engine turboprop. Lindy tried to remain calm.
Smaller
doesn’t mean less safe, right?

As the English coast disappeared Lindy stared out at the
bright sun shining on the clouds. She knew the ocean loomed deep and cold
beneath her but certainly life would not be so cruel as to take her now. She
had begun a journey that would take her places she had only imagined in her
stories—or would it?