When Love Hurts and Ghosts Linger (11 page)

The front door barged open and two neighbours came running in as this monster disappeared. They found me in the corner of the room on the floor holding on to Jack tightly and breathing heavy. The window was smashed and the curtains were blowing everywhere from the wind.

“Robyn are you ok” the neighbours voice concerned.

I slowed my breathing and looked at them; fear filled my eyes “Ye-Yeah I’m fine just something broke my window that’s all.”

“I could hear your screams, sounded like someone was attacking you.”

“N-No, I’m ok really” I lied.

They helped me to my feet, helped me tidy up the mess and the glass and boarded the window for me. 

Now this fucker was coming for me in my own flat? I didn’t know what to do, I mean, at that point I was thinking 
‘how will I stop him’
but I hadn’t figured that out yet.

Friday had arrived and I had tried to put all of that behind me ready for a nice weekend with Levi. When Pete arrived to collect Jack I was scared and I didn’t want to let him out of my sight, but I promised Pete could see him and even though he was a dick I wasn’t a heartless bitch.

“Is he ready to go?” Pete asked all cool and calm.

“Yes, all his stuff is in the bag, be careful, watch him and do not let him out of your sight” I tried to contain my panic and fear.

“Of course I will he is my son too you know”

“I know that I’m just saying”

“I will look after him” he smiled at me and stroked my cheek “I wish you could see how much I miss you”

I pulled away “I don’t miss you, you’re here for Jack and that’s it, not to try and spin me a web thank you”

He looked shocked and hurt “I love you Robyn, I want our family”

Doubt was all over my face “You should’ve thought about that before you went dicking around.”

I gave him Jack’s things and sent them on their way. I couldn’t believe he had tried coming onto me, claiming he loved me and all that crap, I was stupid once, I wasn’t going to be stupid again. 

It was around seven in the evening when Levi finally arrived, butterflies were swirling round in my stomach, this beautiful man was coming over to my flat to spend the evening with me and I was nervous and excited all at the same time.

He looked amazing, light blue jeans and a tight t-shirt with some funky logo on the front complimenting his slim and slender body, hair brushed back showing the shaved sides, arms out with all his tattoos, could this guy be any sexier?

We sat and had a chat for a while, laughing and joking, it was nice, I felt so relaxed, at ease, no ghosts around. It was as if all that went away, I felt so at home with Levi, I didn’t understand why when I hadn’t known him for long at that point but I guess they say, when you know, you know, and I knew I never ever wanted this man to leave my life.

“You look really pretty” he was smiling softly at me.

I blushed “thank you”

He leant forward and kissed me. His kiss was soft and sweet yet so powerful I went weak at the knees. I let him take me right there on the sofa, I couldn’t deny him; I didn’t want to, it felt too good.

I remember I awoke the next day with him beside me, cuddled up behind me; arm around me all snuggled in. I felt like I was in heaven, which was nice until Jay appeared. I jumped back and screamed as his ghostly head appeared right next to my bed.

Levi woke suddenly “what, what you ok?” he held me close.

Trying to not look at Jay’s ghost hovering next to the bed I turned to Levi and kissed him.

“Yes I’m ok, just a scary dream, I’m just going to go to the bathroom.”

I shut the bathroom door, my voice low almost a whisper “What the hell are you doing?”

“Coming to see you, you seem nice and cosy”

“I should have known you were here, its bloody freezing Jay….” I wrapped my dressing gown around me in a huff.

“Who’s that” his head pushed through the door.

“He’s with me obviously” I spoke quietly so he wouldn’t hear me talking to myself.

“Wait, isn’t that that guy from the library?” Jay looked at me cocking his eyebrow.

“Yeah….so….what’s your point?” 

“For fucks sake Robyn you barely know the guy” 

“So what? It’s none of your business Jay now will you leave please I don’t want to stand here arguing in the bloody bathroom” I groaned in frustration.

“Robyn I’m just trying to look out for you” even his ghostly face looked concerned.

I sighed at him “I know you are but honestly I’m ok, please Jay, you look terrible, he's going to think I'm weird standing here whispering to myself if hears me, you know, you really need to try and move on.”

“Move on from you?” he looked puzzled.

“No you muppet, like on, on you know?” I rolled my eyes at him.

“I wish I could but I can’t, as long as that thing has a piece of me I’m stuck here, well there.”

SHIT! I totally forgot about that, Jay’s floating there in his ghostly appearance that seems to be rotting away with an arm missing because that monster had it.

“Jay I….” 

I was interrupted by a knock on the door.

“Robyn you ok in there?” I see his shadow against the glass pane.

“Uhh, ye-yeah I’m ok coming out now”

I looked at Jay who just gave me the 
‘I’m always here for you’
 look and a soft smile before he disappeared.

I opened the bathroom door, there Levi was stood with just his boxers on and they sat nicely on his hips. His body was toned nicely, he had messy bed hair and he still looked sexy. He pulled me towards him and wrapped his arms around my waist. I swear he could feel my heartbeat beating against his chest. 

“You ok?” he asked me softly.

“Yes, I’m ok now…..”

He kissed my lips softly and he took my breath away. He lifted me up so my legs were around his waist and he carried me back to the bed. I looked into his eyes with a cheeky smile on my face as if to say
‘you have me now what do you plan to do with me.'

He pushed his body against me and I felt his hard erection digging into me. I pushed my hips up so he could feel that I wanted him to. This sexual connection between us at that point was something I had never ever felt before, not with anyone.

He kissed down my face and onto my neck which made me gasp slightly, my back arched upwards and I grabbed his hair. He slid off my pyjamas and with my feet I pushed his boxers down and off, I remember lying there underneath him feeling rather impressed with myself that I could do that. He rubbed his stiff erection over the entrance to my vagina, he wasn’t entering me, he was teasing me, I cried out with pleasure, I wanted him so bad, my vagina was throbbing, I needed him inside me.

“What do you want baby” he whispered seductively.

“I want you” I whispered back looking into his eyes.

He slid inside me slowly, filling me; desire was running through my body. He eased in and out of slowly, it felt so good, I moaned loudly to which he kissed me, I could feel the vibrations of his moans on my lips and it sent shockwaves of pleasure through my body. It was intense; I felt something in this man I had never felt before. He pushed in and out of me slowly and I remember never wanting this feeling to stop.

“Faster Levi, I need you”

Then oh my fucking god did he really move, I felt him so deep inside me I swear my body began trembling with pure pleasure.

“Robyn I need you”

And with that I climaxed all over him wrapping my legs around him as he then followed suit. The sex was amazing with Levi, I felt connected to him and yes I know it was only a short space of time but I don’t know how to explain it now and I couldn’t explain it then either, this man was mine and mine forever.

He lied on top of me afterwards panting trying to control his breathing, he buried his head in my neck and I could feel the warmth of his breathing against my skin. I didn’t move from under him, I let him lie there on top of me as I played with his hair. This felt like heaven, I wasn’t in love with him at that point but I certainly felt complete drawn to him, devoted you would say.

When the weekend was over it was Sunday evening, I didn’t want him to leave but he had a job and his own flat and I had a job and also Jack was due back that evening. I had been so relaxed all weekend I hadn’t worried about anything which made a change and apart from Jay I didn’t see any ghosts, it could have been that I was caught up in my own little world but hey, I had the best weekend ever. 

As Levi and I were cuddled up watching a bit of TV before he left my phone beeped.

*Hey I’m on my way back now*

It was from Pete, which was fine, I couldn’t wait to see Jack, it was the first time he had spent a weekend away from me, I read the message though and sighed like I was annoyed which Levi picked up on.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, the ex is on his way back with Jack” 

“What, you don’t want to see your son?” His eyes glazed down at me.

I looked up at him “What no of course I do it’s the ex I don’t want to see.”

Levi offered to stay with me until Pete had dropped Levi off which I was grateful for, I didn’t want to be alone with Pete so he could try and worm his way back into my life. Shortly afterwards the buzzer went and I went over to let them in. Jack came running up the stairs towards me.

“Mummy!” he was so excited to see me.

There behind him followed Pete.

“I really enjoyed this weekend, I want to have him every weekend if that’s ok, you through the week me on the weekend” he seemed genuine.

“Uhhh yeah well, I’m ok with that but if I want him home then he will stay but we’ll play it by ear”

He leaned in my door to touch me but I pulled back, Levi was in my kitchen right next to me, out of Pete’s sight but he was clearly in mine.

“Robyn I wish that you knew….”

He stopped suddenly when he saw Levi appear behind me.

“Levi this is Pete, Pete…..Levi” I introduced them.

I saw the look of horror on Pete’s face as he realised I had a new boyfriend, deep down I did feel a sense of pleasure knowing that right at that moment I was hurting that man by being with someone else.

I didn’t care though, I didn’t want to be with Pete and being the child that he was he told me he would see Jack the following Friday and he stormed off, what did he expect me to do then? Jump into his arms and be like 
‘oh I love you lets be together forever’ 
fucking like hell was that ever going to happen.

So Levi and I had made it to one year together and he we were, happy. Because he wasn’t living with me he didn’t see all the weirdness I would get up to, like talking to ghosts or being thrown around the room every now and then and disappearing to go help them.

My job as a carer had stepped up and I was now in the office running the care home rather than being the nurse, it was nice and it reduced my hours meaning more Jack and Levi time. Pete was being his usual dickish self telling me that Levi was just a 
‘faze’ 
I was going through and that I was really too stubborn to see that I wanted him.

Seriously this guy was so full of shit it surprised me how much crap could actually come out of his mouth. I woke up on a cold fresh morning, I had to go to work and Jack had to go to school, rushing around as I normally was trying to get us both ready a cold breeze filled the air.

“What you doing?”

I jump out of my skin “For fucks sake Jay I wished you wouldn’t creep up on me like that”

Jay looked different now, his ghostly appearance was becoming thinner, like he was disappearing, he looked like he had almost completely decomposed and yet he soldiered on constantly popping up in my life.

“Jay I don’t have time right now I have to get to work” I am faffing around trying to organise myself.

“Hello Uncle Jay” Jack spoke smiling at him.

“Hello little feller….”

“Jay stop it, you’ll frighten him, you look like shit”

I am now running late and so is Jack and them two are sat having a nice chat which was annoying me. The room temperature fell colder.

“Jay please go its frigging freezing in here” I snap.

He looks confused, even for a ghost he seemed to not know what it was, he turns to me “That isn’t me”

I quickly grab Jack’s hand and pull him towards me. I can hear breathing, fierce breathing like someone was angry.

“THERE YOU ARE” it shouts.

I feel as if the ground is shaking before me, but it isn't, the shaking is me, a mixture of feeling cold and scared.

“Mummy!” Jack whimpers behind me.

“It’s ok baby mummy got you” I have him behind me protecting him.

Jay is hovering in front of me, even he looks scared, but before he or I can say anything to each-other those evil eyes appear.

“You’re coming with me” that thing is talking to Jay.

I get in-front of him “NO! Leave him alone, he is already in enough pain can’t you see that you don’t need him go away….”

What I don't know is outside my door Levi is listening as he is coming to get me and surprise me and take me to work, obviously he can't hear Jay or this thing shouting he can only hear me screaming, so he starts banging on the door, which I don't hear.

“GET OUT OF MY WAY, I TOLD YOU THEY ARE MINE, HE WILL NEVER ESCAPE ME AGAIN”

“NO!” I scream back defying it.

“Robyn, if he doesn’t take me he will go for Jack” his ghostly eyes gaze into mine with such care.

“Jay please fight him, please” my eyes begin to fill up.

He smiled at me softly “I won’t let him hurt you I….”

Before he could finish that thing swept him away and Jay was gone and this thing was screaming in my face so forcefully it was as if I had wind blowing through the flat.