Vicious Is The Name That They Gave Me: A Philly Story (16 page)

              I studied Chanelle’s approach coming outside towards me. Chanelle is a beautiful woman I can admit, but her character is dreadful. Her manners are atrocious. I do not know where she inherited that lifestyle. She lies way too much. She sleeps around way too much. She turned these girls into whores. And she is taking people lives as if hers cannot be taken as well.

“Hey,” She greeted me hug from the side of me. I accepted it.
Well I made it seem like I did.

“How is everything?” I asked her. I always wanted honesty from Chanelle and in some way she always would disappoint me.
Is she going to give me honesty tonight? Or is she going to lie? Let’s see.

“Good, good. Look at you, you look nice. What are you doing here?” She asked. I can tell something was not right. I can tell she was not being real with me.

“Excuse me? So I can’t be here? What do you mean what am I doing here? Is there somewhere else I should be?” I asked her. I can’t believe Chanelle. She has gotten so greedy with the money she let get stolen.
My money at that. Of course she is going to play everything cool. I wonder if she is going to tell me that the money has been stolen. Let’s see.

“I didn’t mean it like that. I mean usually you are out of town, especially around this time,” She explained.

“Rephrase what you just said,” I told her. I had to remind her that I am not one of her little street friends. She needs to talk with respect and some common sense.
Which I’ve seen she is lacking.
She needs to drop the ratchetness.

“Rephrase what I just said? What?” she was starting to get rude.

“Don’t talk to me with that ghetto shit,” I told her.
She looked at me as if I said something I should not have.

“And if I do?” Not only has she gotten greedy but she had gotten rude as well.
This girl has lost her everlasting mind.
No one is obligated to kiss her ass. She intimidates the girls in the squad and in the streets, but not me.
I’m about to bring this bitch back to reality.

“Listen, just because I made you head not the leader of my squad, it’s not yours. Please don’t ever forget that. You still show me respect. I am still your mother,” I reminded. She didn’t respond but she wanted to. And I was patiently waiting for her to.
Chanelle I am the one bitch that will step to you. I am your mother. You came out of my wound. I decided if you were going live or have an abortion. I see she has forgotten all of that.
“What happened to the safe?” I asked her. I can tell by her face expression she wanted to know how I found out.

“How did you find out?” she asked.

“Does it matter?” I responded ignorantly.

“Somebody broke into it,” she said shrugging her shoulders.
She obviously does not care about anyone but her.

“How did you let that happen, Chanelle? I trusted you,” I told her.

“I don’t know. They came through the window,” She answered.

“Auntie Sasha,” I heard my niece Tori yelled. She ran towards me with her arms open.
How is it that my own daughter does not greet me gracefully but my niece does? I should have made Tori head of the squad.

“Hey girl, how are you?” I asked her while accepting her hug.

“I’m fine. I haven’t seen you in a while. Still looking good like always,” She complemented my aging beauty. I don’t blame her, I do look good to be a forty something years of age and have a body of a twenty something year old.
I look fabulous.
Honey brown skin with brown eyes, thirty-two D cup breast size, a slim built stomach due to my a few times out of a week fitness commitment, and long multi-color natural hair.

“I think we need to have a meeting,” Chanelle suggested.

“Okay,” Tori agreed.

“When?” I asked Chanelle.

“Like in the next hour,” Chanelle responded.

“Alright, where?” I asked.

“In the chambers,” she answered. She continued to keep it short with me.
No problem. Her title is about to come to an end. The meeting will be the first place to make it known.

“I’ll meet you there. I have a business matter to attend to first,” I explained.

“Auntie, what do you have to attend to?” Tori asked jokingly.

“Grown folks’ business child,” I teased while laughing.

“Oh okay, go handle your grown folk’s business then,” Tori joked. I laughed.

“Alright Chanelle, I’ll see you in a little while,” I told her. I gave Tori a hug.

“Uh huh,” Chanelle responded. I could tell she did not care for my attendance. I began to walk towards my car.

              After leaving Chanelle and Tori, I made a quick stop.
See, what is kept in the dark will eventually come out to the light.
The girls, and especially Chanelle do not know they are involved in a family matter. None of them know that Chanelle, Tori, Kassidy, Vicious, and I are related.
Hell they don’t even know Dollah and I use to be married but that was more so for business purposes.
I had everything under my control.
Hell I allowed the dysfunction to continue for so long. I allowed them to make an income, shit I am the orchestrator of all the jobs they went out to.
But Chanelle has gotten carried away. Murdering Dollah was so brutal. We had a very close business relationship. And to add more salt, she slept with Kassidy’s boyfriend and made Vicious fuck him.
What is wrong with this girl? No worries, everything is about to come to light. Wait until this meeting.
I pulled out my phone to call my sister.

“Hello,” She answered.

“I’m outside,” I told her.

“Alright, here I come now,” I watched my sister come out of the house and get in the car.
Tonight is going to be a night to remember.

“Everything is set?” she asked.

“Yup,” I answered. I drove to the chambers.
I had a surprise for them.

Chapter 24

Vicious

              Riding in the car with Simya on our way to the chambers to have our meeting with Chanelle, I thought about everything that has transpired. I never thought at fifteen my life would be this way. I didn’t have the privilege that most teenagers around my age have. I didn’t have a mother and father figure in my life. I didn’t have a mother who was employed by a legit job where the state takes taxes out, her social security comes out, and has a 401K. I didn’t have my father around, but I believe not every teenager does. I didn’t have that typical single parent livelihood. I didn’t have the privilege to stay in school and build friendships, join an extra circular activity such as cheerleading or softball. I didn’t have the privilege to stay in school and go to the boys’ basketball and football games. I didn’t have the privilege of a typical teenager’s life story but then again what is a typical teenager life story? A mother who is a chronic drug addict? A mother that is addicted to drugs she will do anything to purchase her next hit, including giving me away?
Her own daughter, do I not matter? Does she not care about me? How could she, but she never asked how I felt about anything. She couldn’t go get a regular job somewhere and buy normal stuff such as milk, cereal, rice, chicken and instead it was needles, heroine, coke, and liquor.
Somebody tell me what a typical teenager life story is.

              Too many random thoughts came through my mind. I thought about how I do not want my life to be this way. I do not want to live doing this shit for the rest of my life. I do not want to die in these streets. I want to continue my education. I actually have someone in my life that is willing to take their time and get to know me.
I don’t want this street life. I want to get out. I don’t know how but I will. Is God going to give me a way out? I don’t know.

“Why are you so quiet?” Simya asked. I came back to reality.

“I’m just thinking,” I answered softly.

“About what?” I can tell she was concerned with whatever I had on my mind.

“How I want to change my life around,” I told her. I turn towards her. “You don’t want to change your life around?” I asked her. She sat there quietly for a few minutes.

“I thought about it,” she said.

“And?” I wanted to know what she wanted in her life.

“I mean I thought about getting out of the streets and having a regular life,” She paused. Her eyes began to get watery. “I’m so deep in I wouldn’t know where to begin. Chanelle and Dollah took me in. It’s like I feel as though I owe them because if it wasn’t for them I probably would be dead,” Simya paused again. She did not let her tears flow. “I know this shit isn’t the way to live because your life is not guaranteed, your life is at risk. I know all that shit, but I don’t know how I would be able to get out. My family doesn’t give a fuck about me. My own mother doesn’t even care about me,” she confessed her feelings.

“I care about you,” I told her. Since I have been around Simya I felt as if we grew a sisterhood bond.

“Same here,” She said.

“If an opportunity presents itself for you to get out, would you take it?” I asked her.

“I don’t know,” She answered.
How could she not know?

“You don’t owe anyone your life,” I told her. Instead of responding she gave a smirk.

“Enough of this shit, I don’t want to talk about this anymore. So how are things with you and Taye?” she asked.
Uhh, he’s the love of my life.
“He texted me good morning and told me to have a good day. Simya, he is so perfect,” I said smiling.

“Pause. No niggah is perfect,” She corrected.

“He isn’t a niggah. He’s a gentleman,” I laughed. She laughed as well.

“Uh huh, he gave you that good,” Simya joked.

“It isn’t even about that though. We don’t talk about that all the time. We talk about life, goals, what we want,” I explained.

“Oh, okay, well I’m happy for you. Just know to tread carefully,” She warned. I understood why she would warn me but she didn’t need to. These other guys do not compare to what he is. The guys my mother has dealt with do not compare to him.

“I got you,” We continued to talk more on our way to the meeting.

Chapter 25

Retta

              Planning the squad’s party was the best thing that has happened this week and everything else,
fuck it.
I don’t care anymore. Most of these bitches did it to themselves. These
Bitches are weak these days, like that doesn’t have anything to do with me.
They attracted drama to each other. And then this is what irks the shit out of me, when things hit the fan they want to blame it on everybody else. I literally sat back to watch how these dumb ass girls get caught up in unnecessary bullshit on their own, willingly. In a heartbeat, they turn around and say it’s because of someone else.
Come on, own up to your shit. I want one of these bitches to blame me for something. I dare them to.
You see, my name hasn’t come up in anything. You don’t hear people blaming shit on me and I am not blaming shit on people. I am always low-key. Yes, we are in a squad and you know, we do our thing, but they let it get to their head. They don’t know how to keep their mouths closed. It’s not a deep-hearted bond we have.
It’s about the money in my eyes. I don’t really fuck with them for real, for real. I mean I may portray that affect, but it’s just business. And I portray that affect very well.
Don’t get me wrong, when shit gets rowdy and I do ride.
We’re ridahs.

             
Chanelle had called an immediate meeting. While I am making my way to the chambers, I thought about how someone stole the money. Luckily, I did not put all of my money in there. I bet some of the girls did. With all the madness going on somebody is going to die again. A squad should not operate like that.
No type of organization or communication.
I needed to work on an exit strategy. It’s time for me to do my own thing now. Chanelle and I may seem close and all, but trust me there is nothing close about us except money. Working with Chanelle is like working with a devil. You
always have to be a bitch, it always has to be her way or get the fuck out of her way it always has to be this and that. Shut the fuck up, how about that way?
I was doing my part as a ridah. I was a faithful ridah. No matter what, even if I don’t like you and you’re a part of the squad I’m going to ride for you. I have a true squad spirit.
True squad spirit? I just made that shit up. What the hell is a true squad spirit?
I laughed to myself.

              I know I talk about these girls as if they are not anything. I might say a couple of negative comments that are not needed to be said but I still ride regardless. While I don’t like Chanelle’s trifling, gold digging, smutty ass, I still ride.
I’m a true ridah.
Some of the girls are not true ridahs, pulling schemes on each other and being disloyal. Some of them work with our enemies.
Bitch, you are disloyal. So fuck it, I’m going to do the same shit.
You want to jeopardize our lives when you want to work with outsiders, well I’m going to do the same thing. I truly believe an outsider broke into the safe.
One of these dumb ass girls told whoever where the safe was. That was not an all of a sudden robbery.
Let me find out who was part of it, it’s going to be over.

              I have to admit before working with Chanelle, I was working with Tonya.
Yeah, the same ugly bitch who has a problem with Chanelle.
Tonya is more of an associate. We are mutual. I stopped working with Tonya because some of the things she was getting involved with, I just was not going to do. Despite how ugly she is; she still gets money.
I can’t even hate.
We blow every now and then. I decided to call and see what was up with her.

“Hello,” She answered the phone in an exhausted tone.

“Hey bitch, what’s up? Are you asleep?” I asked her.
It was like three in the morning.

“Yeah, what’s good with you?” she asked.

“I’m on my way to the chambers, we got a little meeting,” I told her. Our association to each other will always remain irrelevant to the squad. While we still keep in contact with each other from time to time, we do not discuss what is going on within our squad. I don’t ask her anything and she doesn’t ask me anything. We just talk about other shit and smoke.
She has like the best weed in the city. Tonya is well connected. The bitch is ugly as shit, though.

“Oh yeah, so how did that party go. I was trying go up there but I got held back with shit,” She told me.

“Shit was popping until Chanelle came downstairs and ruined it,” I told her.

“For real?” She started laughing. “What did she do?” Tonya asked. I’m not obligated to tell Tonya about the money being stolen out of the safe. It’s one of our rules. We don’t discuss what happens within our squad.

“She kicked everybody out,” I snapped.

“Damn, she drawling. Why did she do that?” she asked. She wanted details. I told her what I wanted her to know.

“It’s because she wanted to be a bitch, you know how she gets,” I lied.

“Yeah, it’s like her,” she agreed.

“Yeah,” I said. I never quite thought about if shit were to go down between Chanelle and Tonya.
Whose side would I take? I would take Chanelle’s.
Like I said, we just blow and buss it up. There is no bond.

“How long is your meeting?” she asked.

“I don’t even know how long this bullshit is going to be. I’m going to hit you up when it’s over,” I told her. I could tell she wanted to get off the phone. People start asking questions like, “When are you going to be finished? How long are you going to be? You know, shit you don’t know until you get there. I didn’t hold a grudge. I’m going to let Tonya go about her business. I might have interrupted her.

“Alright girl, I’m going to let you go,” I told her.

Alright, I’m going to finish what I was doing before you called,” she stated.

“Bitch, I thought you were sleeping?” I asked jokingly. She laughed and I heard noises in the background.

“I was,” She laughed.

“Uh, huh, fucking hoe,” I teased.

“So what,” She knew I was playing with her.

“Alright,” We hung up. I was around the corner from the chambers.
This is bullshit now I have to listen to.
I needed a sip of vodka before going in here. At the stop light, I reached to the back seat and pulled out a bottle. I took two shots and continued to drive.