Unthinkable (Berger Series) (13 page)

Evan walked away from the gun and sat down. He stared at Yoshi and tried to remember college and when they’d first met. Back before there was ever any inkling that they’d be struggling to survive the end of the world. It was their second year of college. Evan was friendly, if a bit shy. But it was Yoshi that broke the ice; all the military moves had taught him how to do that. They’d become fast friends, the worldly Yoshi leading the way. That was almost six years ago. And now here they were, in some barn, maybe in Kansas, surviving together.

Evan shook his head. Yoshi was the strong one here. He was the one who always knew what he was doing. Evan remembered a St. Patrick’s Day, maybe sophomore year. It was late in the evening and everybody was pretty drunk. A couple of jerks walked over and started razing Yoshi about being Asian. Yoshi pointed out his father was Irish, so he was probably more Irish then they were. It had almost come to blows, but Evan remembered stepping in, offering them a drink and somehow everything came out okay. So maybe he could handle things when he had to. It was up to him anyway, at least for now. Yoshi thrashed and cursed in his sleep. Evan wanted to bury his face in his hands. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.

Instead, Evan walked back over to the gun, picked it up, and sat down near Yoshi. He strained to hear any sounds in the darkness. The cows mooed and moved around and the wind chime faintly tinkled. There was no sound of traffic, no TV set, no electric hum. The world had discarded the noises of modern life. Yoshi settled back down into quieter dreams again. Evan lay back on the hard wooden floor and fell asleep with the gun near at hand.

Evan woke with a start. A song he couldn’t quite remember played in the back of his mind, gone as soon his eyes opened. He was surprised he’d slept so well, but chalked it up to exhaustion. Early morning light leaked into the barn. Evan
stood up stiffly and stretched, noticing Yoshi was tangled in the covers again. He put the gun in his waistband, picked up the pot and went down the ladder. He dumped the leftovers outside the barn and left the pot by the pump.

Taking a deep breath he climbed back into the house. Evan went through the kitchen, opening every
cabinet and drawer. There wasn’t much food, but there was an oatmeal canister and three-fourths of a bottle of liquor. In a drawer were matches and a flashlight. The stove was electric, so Evan climbed back outside.

There was some wood near the back door. Evan made a small fire and cooked some oatmeal. He put the alcohol in his pocket. When it was done he carried the pot back up to the loft. Yoshi was awake and waiting for him. “How are you feeling?” asked Evan.

“Better, I think,” said Yoshi. “Let’s see if this stays put better than dinner.”

They ate in silence. Evan was glad for the thick meal. He was still a little hungry when they finished. Then again, he doubted he’d ever be full again.

“Did you go in the house?” asked Yoshi.

“Yeah,” Evan looked away.
“Nothing in there, really.”

“
You sure?”

Evan sighed and looked at Yoshi. “I got what there was
for food.” He pulled the alcohol out of his pocket and twisted the lid off. “And there was this.”

“Hey!” Yoshi grab
bed it from him. “What the hell? Give that to me. What’s the matter with you?”

Evan shrugged and tossed him the lid. “
There’s a couple dead bodies in the house too.”

“Maybe we should move on then,” said Yoshi, twisting the lid back on firmly and giving Evan a look.

“Not yet,” said Evan. “You’re not 100-percent better. ‘Sides it’ll do your ankle good to rest it one more day.”

“We need to get to Wyoming,”
grumbled Yoshi, “it’s probably September already.”

“One more day.
If you’re better tomorrow we’ll go. Why don’t you go back to sleep?”

Yoshi glared at him, but took the bottle and laid down a few feet away. Evan picked up the bowls and took them to the pump to clean them out. He looked at the house, wondering why they had chosen to make that place their tomb. It was still warm, but the soul-stifling heat and humidity seemed to have let off for the time being. Evan shook his head sadly and stuck his hand in his pocket. He pulled out Damien’s ID and the note. Evan stared at the ID, wondering at the picture of a scowling young man. He put that back in his pocket and read the note. Yoshi hadn’t failed him. If anything he’d failed Yoshi.
And Damien.  Evan shoved the note back in his pocket. Yoshi needed him now. He would take care of Yoshi whether he liked it or not. Picking up the pot, he headed back into the barn.

As Evan came back up the ladder, he saw
Yoshi was reading the book in one hand and with the other he was playing with the dog tag, flipping it over and over again. Evan felt a wave of exhaustion crash over himself. Wordlessly he walked toward the back of the loft and curled up for a nap.

Chapter 11

It seemed to Evan that he’d just closed his eyes when Yoshi was shaking him awake. Evan sat bolt upright, reaching for the gun. Yoshi shook his head. “Everything’s okay. I just made lunch.” Evan nodded, shaking inside at his reaction. It was almost as if every time he woke up, something else bad happened.

It was soup again for lunch, but at least Yoshi had gotten it warm. He’d cleaned up a bit at the pump and looked better. Still, there seemed to be a shadow lingering over him and he was pale. He caught Evan staring at him.

“I think I’m doing better,” he said with bravado. “Hopefully we can leave in the morning.”

“That would be good,” said Evan, “We’re way too close to the city here. How’s the book?”

“Really good, actually.
You should read it.”

“Maybe later,” said Evan. “
Lemme go get lunch cleaned up.” Yoshi started to stand, “No, you stay here and rest.” Yoshi started to protest, but shook his head and pulled out the book again.

Evan climbed down the ladder
again and went to the pump. The sky was turning grey again; probably rain later. He wondered what time it was. He worked the pump and rinsed out the pot. Oatmeal for dinner, he decided. Oatmeal and soup. Not exactly a balanced diet. He walked back to barn and climbed into the loft. Yoshi had wrapped the blanket around himself and was still reading. Concerned, Evan walked over and felt his forehead. Yoshi watched him. He felt warm again.

“W
hy don’t you put that down and sleep again for a while?” suggested Evan.

“
Gonna finish this chapter,” answered Yoshi.

“Yoshi…”

“What, are you my mother?” snapped Yoshi.

“Are you
mine? Where’d you hide the bottle?” asked Evan.

“You don’t need to drink, Evan,” Yoshi looked concerned

“Well you do need to sleep,” Evan glared at him.

Yoshi looked steadily at Evan and jerked his thumb at the hay stack in the corner. Then he went back to reading. Evan walked over and found the bottle stuck between two bales. He pulled it out. Defiantly he twisted off the lid, took a small swig and put the cap back on. He looked back at Yoshi again. He was doubled over, whimpering quietly. Evan made it to his side in three steps.

“Yosh?” Evan tried to keep the fear out of his voice.

Yoshi kept his eyes closed and slowly shook his head. His temperature seemed to have exploded as Evan touched him.
He tried to lurch to his feet, but Evan caught his arm and helped him to a far corner of the loft before he lost his lunch. He helped Yoshi back to where he’d been laying. Yoshi mumbled as he curled up again shivering beneath the blanket.

Evan squatted next to Yoshi and watched him. He mumbled for a while before getting quiet. “I’m not cut out for this,” he muttered.
He sat on the floor and watched Yoshi sleep. Slowly, in the heat of the afternoon his eyes closed and he drifted off.

Evan saw his Mom and Dad standing in the kitchen in the old house on Maple Street, arguing. He stood in the living room, unseen, watching and waiting. He could see the angry expressions, but couldn’t hear the words. Suddenly Dad snatched the keys from the counter and left the house. The door slammed silently. Mom turned, saw
Evan, and with tears running down her face she quietly retreated up the stairs.

The dream/memory shifted. Now Evan stood numb before two fresh graves. The day was too sunny and bright. Funerals should be conducted in the rain, he thought. Yoshi stood behind him, silent and strong. Evan wiped away tears. Maybe funerals came with rain after all.

Another shift. Evan stared down at a blood soaked street and two corpses. As he looked at Damien’s unseeing eyes, Damien sat up and pointed an accusing finger. “You killed me!”

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean…” Evan tried to speak.

“You killed me!” repeated Damien. “Who else will you let die?” Damien looked over at the other corpse

Evan followed his gaze. The second corpse was Yoshi. “No!” He stumbled back as the corpses climbed to their feet. Evan turned to run but couldn’t move. Dead hands grabbed at his heels…

“Ahh!” Evan’s eyes flew open. He looked over and saw Yoshi. His heart skipped until Yoshi moaned and rolled over. Shaking and sweating Evan climbed to his feet. He stumbled to where he’d left the bottle and took a slow swig. The nightmare slowly retreated. Yoshi tossed and turned in his sleep. Evan put the bottle down and unsteadily went to Yoshi’s side. He put his hand on Yoshi’s forehead. Yoshi twisted away and curled into a whimpering ball.

Evan sighed and went to make dinner. By the time he’d returned Yoshi had thrown the covers off again and was mumbling in his sleep. Evan tried shaking him, but he shook his head and pulled away. “Come on
Yosh, you need to eat,” he said, pulling Yoshi into a half-sitting position leaning against him. Yoshi half opened his eyes, limp and hot. Evan spooned oatmeal into his friend’s mouth. Yoshi accepted it, staring off into space, mind somewhere far removed.

Evan fed Yoshi half the oatmeal before carefully laying
him down on his side in case he got sick again. Evan took the rest of the oatmeal and sat down a few feet away to eat it. Soon Yoshi was thrashing again.

“Leave me alone, Pat, dad wants me to finish this,” Yoshi muttered in his sleep.

Evan watched him, fascinated. Must be talking about his oldest brother, he thought.

“Dad, I’m sorry, Pat was…
ow! Daddy, I’m not lying! Daddy!” Yoshi dissolved into sobs in his fevered sleep. Evan stared, heart racing. What was Yoshi dreaming about? Yoshi had never talked about any of this. Evan waited for more, but Yoshi quietly slipped into other dreams.

Evan stared at Yoshi, slowly realizing that maybe he didn’t know his friend that well after all. Yoshi never had talked much about his family, aside from the bas
ics. Two older brothers. Ryan, five years older and Pat, ten years older. Yoshi and Ryan were somewhat close, but he didn’t get along well with Pat. Pat had died when Yoshi was fourteen, killed in combat overseas. Less than a year later Yoshi’s father had died. And all of that after his parents divorced when he was thirteen. Then his mom died when he was in college. No wonder Yoshi was so strong; he’d had to be. But really, that was all he knew about Yoshi, just those cold facts. Evan wondered what else he didn’t know about Yoshi, and remembered his behavior since the first town. What had happened?

Evan shook himself from his
memories and went back out to wash the pot. Too much change in too short of a time. I mean really, did he even know who
he
was anymore? He washed his hands at the pump, making sure this time to stop when the water did. Then he put water in the pot to bring it back up to Yoshi.

Evan climbed back up to the loft. Yoshi was whimpering quietly. Evan left the water near him and went over to where he’d gotten sick earlier. He kicked more straw on the mess, and then tried to slide it off the edge of
the loft with his shoe. Ew.

Evan sat next to Yoshi. He scooped out a cup of water and tilted Yoshi’s head to give him a drink. Yoshi accepted it without opening his eyes. Evan sat next to him to watch for the night.

Evan dozed fitfully, waking whenever Yoshi got loud. First he cried for his Mommy. Evan shivered and crawled to his side. He soaked the towel and put it across his forehead. Still burning hot to the touch. Evan wondered for the first time what he would do if Yoshi died from this. He quickly shoved that thought away. Yoshi would pull through. He’d have to pull through. Evan sat back to try and doze again.

The second time Evan woke up Yoshi was apologizing, but he couldn’t tell to who or why. Evan crawled over and wrung the towel out. This was getting ridiculous. He grabbed the flashlight and gritted his teeth. There had to be some fever reducer in the house somewhere. He climbed down the ladder and headed for the dark tomb. The night was black and the threat of rain hung close by. As he again climbed through the window the air was still and fetid. Evan could hear every single heart beat as he creaked through the house. With the flashlight he quickly found the downstairs bathroom. He pulled open the medicine cabinet and found what he was looking for. Evan considered looking for another bathroom and cold medicine, but decided against it. Not upstairs, and especially not in the dark.

Evan made his way back up to the loft. He carefully lifted Yoshi’s head. “You need to swallow this,” Evan whispered in his ear as he shook out a couple of pills and shoved them into his mouth, followed quickly by the water.

Yoshi sputtered, but swallowed. He thrashed “Please, just stop!” he cried and fought against Evan.  “Don’t do this…” Yoshi whimpered. With shaking hands Evan laid Yoshi back down and pulled the blanket over him. Yoshi
whimpered and curled up again.

Evan reached over, grabbed the bottle and took a swig. He resisted the urge to just start chugging. Yoshi still needed him, and that meant sober. He remembered college days and parties with way too much to drink. But they’d always walked or had a driver. Evan had never really been in fear of Yoshi’s life before. Or at least, not like this. He’d certainly thought he might have been dead after that one town. But that was different, that would have been Yoshi going down fighting. Yoshi didn’t deserve to die whimpering from a fever. Evan shook his head. Yoshi was not going to die here.

Yoshi yelped in pain in his sleep. Evan bit his lip and forced himself not to cry. Instead he took another drink from the bottle. Yoshi would be okay. He’d have to be okay. Evan leaned back to try and sleep some more. The rain finally started falling on the roof.  He was scared, he admitted to himself as he closed his eyes. That was okay, that was normal. Evan tried to believe that.
Well it is normal
, he argued with himself. It wasn’t fear, it was what you did with it. He closed his eyes and dozed off again.

Yoshi woke Evan once more in the night, mumbling in Japanese. He was still warm, but seemed to be a little bit better. Evan tucked the blanket around him before dozing off again.

It was nearly dawn when a strange sound woke Evan up. It took a bleary moment before he realized it was the sound of vehicles. Without thinking Evan rushed down the ladder and peered out the door. Two military vehicles were on the road, headed their way. Evan stared for a moment before turning and scrambling back into the loft. No more hesitation. He looked around the loft and rushed over the stack of hay bales. He pulled one down, and then set another next to it, forming a barricade in front of the rear wall. He grabbed the bag and the pot and threw them in the corner behind the bales. He picked up the bottle and
shoved it in his pocket.

Evan could hear the squeal of brakes over Yoshi’s unconscious muttering. “Come on Yoshi,” he whispered harshly, shaking him. Yoshi rolled over and tried to shake him off. A door slammed shut. Desperate, Evan picked up Yoshi with the blanket and carried him behind the bales. He sat and held Yoshi in his lap as he listened to nearby voices. He eased the gun out of his waistband as he double checked to make sure no part of Yoshi was sticking out from behind the
bales.

The voices outside were male and tense. Evan cocked the pistol and looked down at Yoshi. He was still warm. The voices moved and Evan imagined them heading for the house. They’d find the broken window, no doubt, and the remains of the fire...Evan felt fear spike down his spine. Who would they think killed the people? He swallowed hard and prayed. Maybe God would be listening today.

There was a bang that made Evan jump as the barn door slammed the rest of the way open. Yoshi startled and started mumbling loudly. Evan clamped his free hand over his mouth. Yoshi grabbed at his wrist, eyes flying open in unseeing panic. “Just shut up and stop fighting,” hissed Evan. Yoshi started kicking. Evan smacked him on the temple with the butt of the pistol and he went limp. Evan bit his lip and listened as footsteps entered the barn.

“Someone’s been here, that’s for sure,” said a deep voice.

“They’re probably long gone,” said a second voice.

“Did you see the
busted window? We still have to check it out. Go climb that ladder,” said Deep Voice. “Be careful.”

Evan slumped down as low as possible behind the bale, head near Yoshi’s. He was relieved to hear Yoshi breathing quietly. There were footsteps on the ladder, and then moving through the hay. Evan held his breath as the steps stopped. There was a clang below and Deep Voice cursed.
The footsteps came closer. Evan adjusted his grip on the pistol, but now his other hand was holding Yoshi up. Then a soldier was there, looking down at them. Evan stared up at him. Their eyes met. The soldier silently set the book down and turned away. Evan hadn’t realized he’d forgotten it in his hurry. “Nothing up here,” he called.

“Good,” grunted Deep Voice. “Let’s get back to town so they can ship the people up here. Couple dead folk in the house we’ll have to remove. I don’t want to stick around here any longer then I have to.”

Evan let out his breath as the soldier climbed back down the ladder. What the hell was that? The footsteps left the barn. He let Yoshi sag to the floor and stood up. The battered, blood stained book sat on top of the hay bale. Evan scrambled to the edge of the loft. The barn door stood wide open now and morning light spilled onto the equipment. Through the opening Evan could see a pair of vehicles and a group of soldiers climbing back into the vehicles.