Unthinkable (Berger Series) (8 page)

Evan looked back to the low fire visible through the trees.  This whole situation was crazy. He put his hand on his head and felt bump. The memory of violence echoed in his head. Damien was right; he was still alive. Whether he had any more right to be than anyone else was a different matter. Evan sank down and watched as the water gently moved in the moonlight. Beautiful things. There were still beautiful things in the world. Nature. Friendship. Duty, honor and loyalty weren’t dead, at least if he didn’t let them. Just because people walked in hate didn’t mean he had to join them.

Would Yoshi give in to hate? Maybe, Evan admitted. But then, wasn’t that part of being human? Either of them
were just as likely to fall into it. Evan slowly shook his head and lay back, looking up at the stars.

Evan woke up a few minutes later. More dreams filled with blood and pain. He walked back to the fire, shaking slightly. Damien silently handed him the flask. Evan took it, drinking slowly. A warm numb sensation spread through him. Damien nodded and took it back. Evan lay down again and slipped into uneasy dreams.

The next day passed slowly. Damien and Evan didn’t talk as they walked. The heat was endless and muggy. Time itself seemed to melt and stretch out as they took one step after another.  Evan stayed awake this time when they halted for the hot part of the day. Damien pulled out a book and read. Then it was back on their feet to continue the march well into the evening. Damien was quiet as they ate another late dinner. Evan reached over, took a swig of the flask and went to sleep.

“I am not going to go into another town,” Evan said around noon the next day as they saw a town on the next hill.

“I can’t say I blame you,” said Damien, looking at it. There were trees here on either side of the road leading in. “Tell you what, you wait in these trees. I need to see about supplies and stuff. If I’m not back by dark go on without me.” He started leading Evan into the trees.

“Are you crazy?” asked Evan. “How do I know you’re not just going to lead a mob out here to kick my ass?”

Damien sighed and looked at Evan. “I’ll leave half my food and water with you.”

“How about your pistol?”

Damien met Evan’s eyes. He silently pulled the pistol out of his waistband and handed it over. They walked into the trees. Damien turned away and pulled open his pack. He took out a few cans of food and a bottle of water and
set them on the ground. Looking at Evan again he also pulled out the book he’d been reading and set that on top. “If I’m not back by dark, leave without me.”

Evan nodded and watched as Damien walked back to the road and then turned for the town. He looked down at the pistol in his hands. It was a revolver like the last one he’d held. He popped it open and saw it was fully loaded.  Evan closed it again and looked toward the road. He sat down against a tree and faced the road. He was pretty sure he couldn’t be seen from where he was sitting. Evan set the gun down between his feet and looked over at the pile of supplies. He reached over and grabbed the book from on top. He opened the well-worn paperback and started reading. Science fiction wasn’t his usual thing, but it was interesting, at least.

The sun made its way across the sky. Evan got lost in the story and didn’t look up until he heard the sound of hooves striking pavement. He lowered the book and watched a horse drawing an empty wagon toward the town. Evan shook his head in amazement. It was surreal, he thought, in only a few weeks they had gone back a hundred years. After the wagon passed he tossed the book onto the pile, stood and stretched.

Evan reached down and put the gun in his waistband. He picked up the water and took a swig. No sign of Damien yet. He looked up at the sky and wondered how long until darkness.  He could leave now, he realized. Nothing was preventing him from taking the supplies and the gun and just going. But, that wouldn’t be fair to Damien. Evan leaned against the tree and his mind wandered back to Yoshi again. The dream had been one shot to the head. Would Yoshi let anyone get close enough to do that? Travis had backhanded Yoshi to the ground without Yoshi even protesting. Did he even know who Yoshi was anymore? Evan shook his head and wished Damien had left more to drink besides water.

Footsteps on the road made Evan pull the gun and duck behind the tree. “It’s me,” called Damien. He walked into Evan’s line of sight, hands open in front of him. Evan stepped from behind the tree, pistol pointed at the ground at Damien’s feet. “Yer getting better,” observed Damien.

Evan shrugged, turned the gun around and handed it back to Damien.

“I think Yoshi was here,” said Damien as he took it and put it back in his waistband.

“What?” Evan stared. “That’s not funny…”

“I wouldn’t joke about that,” said Damien. “Fella I talked to said that a limping Asian guy came through town a day or so ago. Didn’t stop, just walked straight through town.”

“That sounds like Yoshi,” admitted Evan. Maybe the dream was just a dream after all. He smiled as he felt hope for the first time in days.

“I told you Yoshi’s a tough hombre,” said Damien as he shoved supplies back into his pack. “So he’s alive. We’re not too far from Kansas City, maybe we can catch up to him there. We should really try and circle ‘round the city though. The supplies I got should get us well into Kansas.”

“Shouldn’t we head through Nebraska?” Evan tried to remember geography.

“We will, but we need to go through part of Kansas first.” Damien shouldered the pack again and they set off through the trees, skirting the town.

Evan watched Damien as they walked. He wondered again why Damien was helping him. But, Damien had handed over the pistol when he could have left Evan defenseless. He could be lying about Yoshi’s appearance, but then what would he have to gain?

They slipped past the town before settling down to sleep. Evan stared up at the night sky and thought about the world. He would never have questioned why someone helped another one in the world before. People helped one another because that’s what they were supposed to do. The thought occurred to him that he was glad that his parents died when they did.  Sure they’d had a head-on with a semi, but the doctors had assured him that they’d died almost instantly. That had to be better than starving or watching your whole world fade away. He examined the thought and realized he felt no guilt for it. This was life now. If there really was a heaven his parents were there. Above him the cold stars twinkled in the same way they had for eons and would continue to do so until the earth itself melted away.

Chapter 7

Evan startled awake from another nightmare. In his dream the world was ending. He felt an explosion rather than saw or heard it.
Screams. Shelly. Then the old man Yoshi had killed. Evan shook his head to clear it. Damien was sprawled next to the fire. Evan stood up and walked to the road and back, trying to clear his head. It was almost dawn. Damien mumbled something and stirred. Evan turned and watched him, wondering what kind of life Damien had led that brought him to this place.

Damien sat up and stretched. He saw Evan already awake and nodded at him. Damien rummaged in his pack and produced instant coffee. Evan banked the fire like Damien had shown him and soon they had hot coffee. Evan reveled in it. It was bitter, but he realized just how much he’d missed caffeine.

“Special treat,” said Damien. “Yoshi’s alive and we’ll probably hit the edge of Kansas City today. I don’t know what we’ll find but we’d best be prepared for the worst.” Evan sipped and wondered what the worst would look like. He tried to picture a city in rubble, but could only remember 9/11. How many more had died this time?

After breakfast they walked side by side up the road. For most of the morning it was the same old fields and trees. Buildings started cropping up, one or two before a space, but gradually closer together. Retail shops for the most part, all of them abandoned. There were more side streets too, and on one corner the burned remains of a gas
station. There were cars, mostly pulled onto the shoulder, but some in ditches and some left in the lane. All abandoned as if every occupant had suddenly decided to take a walk. Perhaps that’s exactly what had happened. Evan thought of his dream and wondered what exactly had happened here and in St. Louis.

The retail stores continued until they were definitely in the suburbs. Damien looked around with frustration. “We need to head more north. I don’t
wanna get anywhere near the city.”

Evan nodded in agreement and wondered just how big the
bombs were that had demolished this and so many other cities. Big enough for fallout for miles? Or just big enough to wreak havoc and bring down the infrastructure? Was it only the big cities or the outlying areas as well? There wasn’t any jumping online or turning the TV on for news anymore. As he thought about news traveling only by word of mouth he was reminded of the game of telephone. How accurate would any information be that was just passed from person to person? Damien turned up a side street and Evan hurried to catch up.

Damien led them on for nearly another hour. Evan could see he was growing more frustrated as they seemed to only get deeper into the suburbs. He looked over at Evan. “I’m sorry
man, I don’t usually come to a big city like this. I’m a little…lost.”

Evan stopped and looked at Damien. He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could say anything a military Humvee came around the corner. Evan stared at it as Damien grabbed his arm and started pulling him toward an alley. The gunner on the Humvee pointed his weapon at them.
“Freeze!” He shouted. Evan shook himself free of Damien’s grip and waited. Damien stood next to him with a sigh. These were soldiers, thought Evan, so, nothing to fear, right? Evan remembered the cop, but pushed that thought away.

A soldier jumped out of the Humvee, holding tight to
his M-16. His started to lower it as he saw Evan. Evan raised his arms in a gesture of surrender. Damien cursed and put his arms up too. “Kneel and put your hands on your head!” the soldier shouted. Evan and Damien did as they were told.

“All residents were ordered to report to camp Zed,” growled the soldier as he walked toward them. “There is martial law. No one allowed on the streets.” He stopped in front of Evan and glared down at him. “What are you doing here?”

“We’ve been walking for days.” Evan looked at the soldier’s knees and thought. “I have family in Wyoming we’re trying to get to.” Well, it was only half a lie.

“Well you aren’t going anywhere but processing.” The soldier turned and barked something at the soldiers in the Humvee. Evan felt the hard pavement below his knees. Damien was tense next to him. Whatever was going to happen, Evan knew that he’d have to be very careful. He mentally cursed his birth parents and then immediately took it back. Whoever they were
, they had given him up to give him a chance and couldn’t just blame them for his looks being a problem right now. Another soldier walked up and yanked the pistol from Damien’s waistband. Then he patted them down for any other weapons.

Evan’s arms quickly grew tired, but he didn’t dare move. He was all too aware of the soldiers around him with their rifles. A few minutes later a large truck drove up. A woman climbed out of the passenger seat and strode over to the lead soldier. She had a pistol on her side.

“What’s going on here Sergeant?” The woman asked, looking down at Evan and Damien. “Looters are to be shot on sight.”

A chill ran down Evan’s spine. “I thought you might want to talk to them, ma’am.” Sergeant reached over and pulled the hat off of Evan’s head.

“I see,” she said. “Were they armed?”

“This one was,” he pointed at Damien.

“ID?”

“I didn’t ask.” Sergeant nervously adjusted his rifle.

“Do you have ID?” The woman asked.

“Mine was stolen,” Evan kept his eyes forward.

“Mine’s in my right back pocket,” Damien looked up at her.

Another soldier stepped behind Damien, reached in his back pocket and pulled it out.

“Yours was stolen.” she repeated back to Evan.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“I see.” She took Damien’s ID and looked at it. “This is expired,” she said to him.

“I ain’t been back there in a long time.”

The woman stepped back and studied the pair. “We’ll take ‘
em in.”

Two soldiers stepped behind them and zip tied their wrists behind their backs. Evan fought back panic as they pulled him to his feet. This wouldn’t end with another beating, he had to believe that. They loaded them into the back of the woman’s truck with a soldier to guard. Damien stared at the guard until the guard raised his gun
, then Damien smiled and looked away. Evan looked out the back as they sped down the road. The truck seemed to continue driving deep into the suburbs. They took a turn and sped past houses. There was nobody on the streets, as if everyone had vanished. After a while they squealed to a stop. Evan could hear voices outside, then the truck moved forward again slowly.

Evan stared as he realized they had gone through some sort of military checkpoint. Wire stretched from the edges of the checkpoint to out of range of his sight. A terrible smell assaulted his senses.
Hundreds, if not thousands, of people milled about as they passed rows of tents. More than a few looked at the truck as it passed. There was a murmur of humanity that could be heard over the roar of the truck. It seemed they went on for at least a couple of miles.

The truck stopped again, briefly,
then rolled forward just a short ways before stopping for the final time. Their guard stood up and Evan and Damien were taken off the truck. A few more soldiers stood around waiting. Past them Evan saw more wire and then the camp. Evan was pulled one way and Damien the other. Evan looked back and saw Damien looking at him. He felt a sense of strange calm as they headed for a low brick building. Whatever was going to happen would happen. Evan could feel stares on him, so he kept his eyes straight ahead. They entered the building and went down a long corridor, then down a flight of stairs, then down one more corridor.  The guard pushed him into a room. It was empty except for a wooden chair in the middle. The guard set Evan down in the chair and left. Evan heard the door close firmly. He adjusted still tied arms and stared at the empty wall. So, were they going to interrogate him now? He sighed and waited, surprised at how calm he was feeling.

It wasn’t long before the door opened and the woman from before
came in. Evan was startled by how beautiful she was, even in fatigues. She was tall with short brown hair and deep brown eyes that looked at him warily, but not with hate or fear. Evan realized he was staring at her when she gave him a half-smile before stepping behind him. She asked for his name, social and place of birth. When Evan told her he was born in Minneapolis, she walked back into his line of sight and gave him a look that told him she didn’t believe him.

“What, there aren’t immigrants in Minneapolis?” Evan asked her.

“I’m sure you’ll understand my suspicions of anyone Middle-Eastern,” she said, leaning closer.

Evan was fully aware of how close she was standing. “I…I was adopted at birth. My parents were a couple of schoolteachers in Minneapolis.”

She straightened and took a few steps away before turning back to face him. “Where do you live now?”

“I don’t think it’s there anymore,” Evan shook his head. “St. Louis.”

“So how did you end up here?” She bit her lip as she asked.

“Not much to tell. My friend and I left St. Louis the day of the attack, before it happened. Yoshi, my friend wanted to take a drive. We got jumped later that same day and lost our car. We started walking and met Damien, the guy you picked me up with. Then we got jumped again and Yoshi got separated from us.”

She leaned against the wall and studied him for a long moment before again walking up and leaning in close. Evan caught his breath as she looked down at him. This was crazy. This was…she brushed the hair out of his eyes. “What…?” he started to ask.

She leaned down and kissed him, eyes closed. Evan watched her in surprise, not returning the kiss. She broke off and stepped back.

“Why are you doing this?” asked Evan.

“If I cut your hands loose, what would you do?” She asked.

Evan stared silently at her, torn.

She looked into his eyes. “You remind me of someone,” she smiled sadly.

Evan shook his head. “Whoever I remind you of, I’m not them.”

She turned away. Evan watched as her shoulders started to shake. He wanted to comfort her, but stayed rooted to the chair. She put a hand on the wall and turned around, wiping her eyes. “Where…where were you trying to go?”

“Wyoming. My friend has family there.”

“You can’t leave here,” she looked away again. “All surviving citizens are to be held in these camps,” her voice grew in strength. “All I can do is turn you loose into the general population.”

“Whatever you need to do,” said Evan. “I’m…sorry.”

She smiled sadly again, walked up to him and gave him a kiss on the forehead. “You’re sweet. You do remind me of him. Someone else will escort you out.” She looked back at him one more time as her hand rested on the handle. “Good luck.” Then she was gone.

Evan stared after her, thinking and wondering. The door opened again and a gruff looking male soldier walked in. He strode over and yanked Evan to his feet. “I don’t know why they’re just letting you go,” he growled.

The soldier propelled Evan back down the corridors he’d come down. Outside again he was marched toward the gate. The guard pulled out a knife, but held it to his back instead of cutting the ties. “Try something,” whispered the guard. Evan held himself very still. “Pussy,” muttered the guard as he cut him loose.

“Walk through the gate,” ordered another soldier as Evan’s hands fell by his side.

Evan did as he was told, walking carefully and slowly toward the soldiers standing by with their guns at the ready. He could feel the fear rising in him, but he pushed it away and kept his eyes straight and level. He was even with the guards. Then he was past the wire and into the camp. A panorama of sorry looking people in front of him, all of them lost in their own business. Tents stretched off as far as he could see. Evan looked around him, feeling lost.

“Evan!” Damien called him, appearing out of the crowd. Damien smiled broadly, looking relieved. “I’m glad they let you go, I was starting to get worried.”

Evan looked at Damien. “I, uh, guess it took longer for me to explain than you.” He tried to get her sad eyes out of his head.

Damien noticed the passing shadow. “You okay, man? They do anything to you?”

“No, no, I’m fine,” Evan shook his head and gave Damien a smile.

“Okay.” Damien started to reach in his pocket.  He looked at Evan ruefully. “This is why you don’t smoke. Took that along with the rest of my stuff. There’s a chow tent over here.”

Evan followed Damien through the crowd. The air was thick with the smell of a thousand hot, dirty people. Up ahead was a large tent with people waiting in line. Evan and Damien joined the queue. Damien shifted from one foot to the other, clearly ill at ease in the crowd. Evan felt oppressed by the crowd too, after the long quiet of the country. Between the noise and the smell it was nearly overwhelming. The line shuffled forward. Someone coughed.

The crowd drew away from the cougher in a single movement of fear. The small blond woman looked like a frightened dear as the crowd around her pulled away. Fear rustled through the crowd as a pair of soldiers pushed their way through. They took the woman by the arms and quickly hustled her away.

“What’s going on?” asked Evan.

“Someone might be sick. Can’t take the chance,” said the person in front of them.