The Throwaway Year (17 page)

She agreed to allow him to drive and as soon as they were in the car Brian leaned over and kissed her lips gently.

“I’ve been thinking about that for days.”

She touched his face.
“Me too.” This time, she kissed him, but only briefly and then she pulled back. He started the car seemingly very content.

Hayden was happy that Brian had offered to drive because he lived in a portion of Villa Hills
, Kentucky that she wasn’t familiar with and though it only took 15 minutes, they drove through several winding streets.

“I can’t wait to see how you make something like cab
bage even remotely desirable,” he said.

“Honey, if you fry anything with bacon and onions
, it’s a given that it will be good.”

“Hmmm.”
He pulled up to a duplex that overlooked the hills leading to the Ohio River.

“This is pretty,” she said as he opened the car door for her.

“It’s a great place to watch the fireworks.”

He took her hand and led her to his apartment.
It was an open concept room with a staircase leading up to the second level. It was minimally decorated with black leather furniture and chrome finishes, a sharp contrast to the white carpeting and white walls. Normally she wouldn’t have liked it, but the splashes of deep red and neon blue gave the room life.

She turned and smiled at him.
“I love your place.” He had been staring at her and he quickly blushed.

“I’ll take you on a tour after we get dinner started.”
He still held her hand and led her to the kitchen.

“This is…
wow
!”

He had all stainless steel appliances, an island
, and the dark cabinetry looked great with sea green mosaic tile.

“I don’t use it much, well other than the microwave.”
He grabbed two bottles of Moscato but different brands. “Which one?” She pointed to the Barefoot Bubbly and then he poured them two wine glasses full.

She closed her eyes in pleasure as the cold fluid hit her liquor-deprived senses.

“This is so good.” She felt him close and when she opened her eyes Brian’s lips were inches from hers. Instead of kissing her like she expected, he took the glass from her and placed it on the bar and then he nipped her lips lightly.

His hands captured her waist and
he pulled her close to him. “Hayden…”

Her arms wrapped themselves around his neck and she allowed her body to mold against his.
Before she knew it, they were kissing wildly and her leg had moved to wrap around his waist.

He clutched her thigh, allowing his hand to glide upward where he
grabbed her ass. She felt him inhale a shaky breath before his hands began gripping and kneading her flesh. She felt him growing hard against her pelvis and with her dress hiked up and her leg around him his grinding hips pushed against places that even she hadn’t touched in ages.

Electrical shocks traveled up her body and her eyes began to blink at the rapid onslaught of pleasure.
Brian groaned and turned her slightly so that her back was against the cabinet. His hips began to thrust against her rapidly and Hayden’s fist buried into the length of hair at the back of his neck.

He swiftly lifted her and she wrapped both
her legs around him. Brian pulled back slightly, never breaking the connection between their rapidly pumping and rolling hips. He sat her rump on the cabinet and then clutched her breast. He sought her nipple through the material of her bra and pinched and rubbed it until he caused it to thicken and poke against the material.

She cried out in pleasure
, feeling the juices slipping from her opening and wanted more than anything to rip off her damp panties and to feel him against her, skin-to-skin.

“Please Brian!” s
he whimpered her need.

“
God
, Hayden!” Then he reached between them and released himself from his pants. She didn’t bother to look; she wantonly spread her legs as she sought his lips and tongue. A moment later, his fingers had pulled aside the damp crotch of her panties, and then she felt something big and slick separating her swollen flesh just before it pushed into her.

Her breath died in her chest for one tortuous moment and when it returned
, she wailed and thrust frantically against him, feeling the stretch that was just this side of pain and much more that side of amazing. She could not think, or attempt to control her movements and sounds. All she knew was that the pistoning of Brian’s hips could not end—not until…

“
Brian
!” she screamed as her body trembled uncontrollably until there were mini quakes overtaking her.

At the sound of her climax
, Brian pulled the fabric at the top of her dress downward, along with her strapless bra, until her left breast tumbled free. His mouth immediately clamped onto her swollen nipple and he sucked and worked it as he rapidly thrust in and out of her tight opening.  Hayden’s hands became claws as she gripped and held onto him, while her orgasm slashed through her violently.

Her uncontrolled spasms gripped and milked him until his control was shattered and with a guttural groan he fired shots of his semen repeatedly into
her depths. Hayden was unsure how long that had all lasted, it could have been seconds, it could have been an hour, but what she did know was that she had never experienced anything like it. She had no idea that she could experience such a level of pleasure. MyKell hadn’t been her only lover, there had been a few others before him, but nothing had come close to the place that Brian had just taken her.

Brian pulled out of her and then leaned his forehead against her chest while he caught his breath.
She stroked his hair thinking that this was the most perfect moment. People always said to find her perfect place, and she knew that this moment in time would be hers.

Brian raised his head; his eyes were worried when they met hers.
“Hayden…” He still hadn’t fully caught his breath, but the expression on his face was nowhere near as happy as hers.

“We should not have done that,” he said softly.

Her eyes widened in surprise. He shook his head and quickly kissed her lightly on the lips. “No, not that!
That
was beautiful honey. But we didn’t use protection-”

She placed her palms gently on his cheeks.
“It’s okay. I’ve been on the pill since I was a teenager. It helps to keep my cycle regular.”

He didn’t seem relieved by that explanation.
After inhaling deeply, he stared into her eyes. “Honey… I don’t have unprotected sex. Not ever. This is the first time that I’ve ever done that.”

“Ever?”

“Ever.” He frowned and lightly gnawed his lip. “It was… amazing.” He quickly kissed her and then stared into her eyes again as if something worried him.

She waited, confused a
bout his mix signals.

“
You know that I’ve used heroin-”

Her back suddenly stiffened and she looked like she was about to hyperventilate.
He clutched her arms firmly then, but not painfully.

“No!
I’m not HIV positive and I don’t have any STDs. I get tested twice a year.”

“You’ve shared needles?” s
he asked in a weak voice. What was wrong with her? Why hadn’t she realized this? All she’d considered was her inability to get pregnant, but she had never even bothered to ask about his health before taking this step.

“Hayden, l
isten to me. I’m clean. I don’t have anything. But you and I have to be careful. I want to be inside of you as often as possible; but not without protection. Not until I’m satisfied that there is not going to be anything… to worry about.”

He stared at her, searching her face for her acceptance or rejection.

After a moment her racing heartbeat slowed. “Brian, I understand. You’re clean. You don’t have anything… but you could have.”

He nodded
, seeming relieved that she understood what bothered him.

“I wouldn’t put some random woman at risk
, so I sure as hell won’t put you at risk. And as much as saying this makes me want to choke, if you do… make love with someone other than me, then I don’t want you to put yourself at risk with them, either.”

She nodded in understanding and then placed her arms around his neck and
then they touched foreheads.

“Hayden?”

“Hmmm?”

“We have to cook on this counter so…
maybe you should get down.”

She made
a face and punched him lightly on the arm.

He laughed and picked her up
before he set her lightly on her feet, but not before thoroughly exploring her mouth with his again.

Dinner was exquisite, even though it was just chicken wings from a carryout pizza place. Neither of them had felt in the mood to prepare and wait for meatloaf and cabbage. Besides, there really wasn’t much time since they moved to the bedroom and spent several hours there making love instead.

~***~

Hayden was nuzzled against Brian’s chest. He stroked the fine hairs along her temple and she relaxed even more.
She didn’t feel self-conscious being naked in front of him. He was turned on by her and that turned her on. Besides, she was content to watch him equally as naked.

“Brian?”

“Hmm?”

“Why did you stare at me that first day?
When I first showed up at the office?”

His hand paused and she looked up at him and waited.

“Oh…” He smiled without saying more and she propped herself up on her arm, looking at him and continuing to wait patiently.

He sighed.
“That wasn’t the first time I’d seen you,” he finally confessed.

She frowned.
“You’d seen me before? When?”

He looked down and gave her a wry smile.
“I’m not a stalker, okay? But it might sound like I am.”

“Gotcha,” she waited now very curious.

“This last time that I returned to the office, my dad and I had an agreement that I wouldn’t leave the building during work hours. So smoking and eating and anything else had to be done within an eight point five hour time period and within the office only. I’m not… complaining.

“
I had messed up pretty badly the last time I was there. I had gotten out of rehab and went right back on heroin. I would leave the office, meet my dealer and do basically what Marcus used to do; get high in the parking lot or restroom.” His playful look disappeared as he watched her seriously.  “We haven’t talked about this part of my life, but when I came back this last time, it was after going cold turkey off heroin.”

“Jesus Brian…
isn’t that dangerous?”

“Well
, I’d just been through rehab, so my body had already gone through a break from the drug. But yes, it was dangerous, and I sure didn’t feel as if I’d survive it. Anyway Hayden, that part is a horrible story and I’ll tell you about it some other time, but not right now. So when I returned to work, it was about a month after I’d quit and I was still pretty sick.”

Hayden recalled how skinny and pale he was back then.
Heroin withdrawal… damn, it made her feel sad for him. She glanced down at his forearm where the flesh was mottled and scarred from repeated needle injections. Hayden moved back into his arms and he cuddled her while continuing his story.

“In the beginning
, I really needed to smoke; the nicotine just helped. But thinking about that canteen was bad. My system was already screwy and my stomach couldn’t take the smell of Abdullah’s food or the sight of everything else going on in there.”

Hayden huffed her agreement.

“I wasn’t used to it, the way the rest of them were, because when I worked in Lexington, my employees didn’t live like that. But that first day when I went in for a smoke, I saw that the canteen was clean. I mean, I could smell the disinfectant and just the smell of something clean helped to keep me from being nauseous.  I’m sorry to say that I didn’t really think too much more about it. But then one day when I was leaving, I noticed a woman sitting in her car, looking annoyed.”

Hayden lifted her brow at him.

“I figured this woman was waiting to give one of the other employees a ride home, but to my surprise, she went into the office once everyone was gone and being curious, I waited for her to leave to see if she would come out carrying some computers or something.”

Hayden made a face at him and he gave her a wry grin.

“Well, she wasn’t carrying anything and I went home no longer curious.”

“You thought I was a burglar with my own key?”

“I thought you were a very well-dressed cleaning lady.” He leaned over and kissed her. “A very sexy, well-dressed cleaning lady.”