The Thief Who Stole Midnight (10 page)

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

After the initial hullabaloo, everyone settled down. Seth and Nick went off together and talked about the joys of dating cougars. Ruby cornered Maddie and was reading her cards. Meanwhile, Maddie's parents tried their best to eavesdrop, while pretending to watch TV.

Ruby put three cards on the coffee table, face down. "This is your past, present and future."

Maddie nodded.

She flipped over the first card. "Empress. That would be fertility, motherhood."

Maddie nodded again. That made sense.

Then Ruby flipped over the 2nd card. "The Moon. Secrets, lies, half-truths. Something going on behind the scenes." Ruby looked at Maddie, thoughtfully, as if she was trying to read her thoughts.

Maddie shot Mike a panicked look.

Mike walked over with the veggie platter, fake-tripped and caught himself on the table, "accidentally" spilling the cards onto the floor. "I'm so sorry, Gran. Have a carrot."

Taki shook his head. "Moon card, schmoon card. Who believes in that crap?"

Irini laughed. "A card reader told me I'd be married within the year, and then I met you. What do you call that?"

"Your fate and my luck," Taki said, smiling at her and earning himself a kiss.

Maddie looked surprised, but happy. It wasn't often that her parents were openly affectionate with each other. She bent down and helped Mike pick up the cards, making sure to shove the cards that had been laid out on the table, back into the middle of the deck. Before she could grab the last card and bury it in the deck, Ruby bent over and grabbed it.

"Well, well. Look at that. Justice." Ruby cackled.

Just then, the doorbell rang, followed by pounding on the door. Apollo started barking like crazy. This time, the baby woke up and joined him, wailing at the top of her lungs.

"Great," Maddie groaned, picking up the baby. "Now what?"

"Open up. Chicago police." A man's voice thundered through the door.

"Nobody touch that door," Mike said, as he rushed into the bedroom.

"Stupid Justice card," Maddie muttered.

Then he poked his head back out of the bedroom door. "Honey, hold Apollo. Last thing we need tonight is a twitchy cop, shooting our dog."

Maddie handed Rio the baby and a pacifier, then took hold of Apollo's collar.

"Open the door, or we'll break it down," said a bored, female voice.

"Hold on!" Maddie yelled. "We'll be right there."

 Finally, Mike came out of the bedroom and opened the front door.

A policeman and a policewoman stood there, looking irate.

"Ms. Maddie Keyes?" The policewoman asked.

Maddie handed Apollo off to Nick and joined Mike. "That's me."

"We're here about your call," the policeman said.

"What call?" Irini asked.

Maddie glanced at Mike. When up against a wall, go with plausible deniability, she thought. "I didn't place a call," Maddie said. "So, thank you for coming, but, really, we're fine."

 "So... goodbye." Mike said, trying to shut the door.

But the cop was too fast. He shoved his foot in the door, and then wedged his baton in, like a lever, so that the door just bounced open.

"Don't start with us, son. It's been a long night and I have a gun," the policewoman said.

Mike frowned and shot a look at Maddie. As if this proved his point about women and guns.

Maddie narrowed her eyes at him.

The policeman cleared his throat. "We received numerous calls from here about a burglar."

Taki jumped up from the couch. "You were robbed?! What's missing?!" he yelled.

"Nothing. Nothing's missing." Mike said. "It's a misunderstanding."

"Is that who the dead guy in the bedroom is?" Nick laughed. "Your robber?"

Rio reached over and smacked him. "Idiot," she whispered. "You don't kid about dead bodies in front of cops."

"Murder is a felony, ma'am. Even if the victim is a criminal," the policewoman said, taking out her handcuffs.

"I knew it!" Ruby crowed. "The Moon, followed by Justice. The cards are never wrong."

Irini turned on Taki, furious. "What did I tell you? This kind of thing never happens in Wilmette."

"We're not moving, Mom." Maddie said.

"We'll see about that. Taki, help me pack their suitcases. Maddie, you and Sophie are coming home with us." Irini sniffed.

"Sorry, Ma'am. This one's not going anywhere." The policewoman snapped one end of the handcuffs on Maddie's wrist.

Apollo barked again.

"Lock up that dog, sir." The policeman said to Nick. "I would rather not have to shoot him."

"Wait!" Maddie yelped. "Okay, I admit it. We have a burglar. But I swear to God, he's not dead."

"He's just sleeping. Like an oversized baby." Mike said, holding up his hand in a three-fingered sign. "Scout's honor."

Irini gasped. "On your bed?! My coat had better not be on that bed. That's... that's... unsanitary!"

"Not as much as doing it on the kitchen table," Nick muttered.

Rio smacked him again.

"Ow! Whatcha keep hittin' me for?" Nick howled.

Apollo growled at the cops.

"We're not asking again. Lock up the dog," the policewoman said, drawing her gun.

Nick quickly took Apollo to the bathroom and locked him in.

The policewoman holstered her gun.

The policeman stepped forward. "What's going on with the kitchen? You got another burglar in there?"

Irini shook her head. "We were just in the kitchen a little while ago. There's nobody in the kitchen."

Apollo must have given one of his silent but deadly farts, because the smell came under the bathroom door and wafted over the living room, squeezing the oxygen out of the room.

The policeman gasped. "Oh my God, what is that is that smell? I thought you said he wasn't dead."

The policewoman slapped the open part of the cuff on Maddie's other wrist and started reading Maddie her rights. "You have the right to remain silent..."

"Mike!" Maddie wailed. "Do something!"

Mike made a move towards Maddie and the policeman pulled his gun. "Everyone freeze. Hands where I can see them."

As Mike put his hands up, the cop shoved him into the wall, twisted Mike's arm behind his back and cuffed him.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Finally, Rio and Nick were able to convince the cops that Maddie and Mike weren't the felons in this equation and maybe they should look at the bedroom. Within minutes, everyone was crammed into the bedroom with the cops, gawking at the sleeping burglar.

It looked bad for Mike and Maddie. The guy was handcuffed to their bed and there was a pile of clothes and lingerie on him. His mouth and nose were covered in a mask that was hooked up to a machine. And there was an open, mostly-empty bottle of Nyquil next to him.

"You see?" Maddie said, still outraged. "Not. Dead."

Maddie's mom was absolutely beside herself, rattling off what sounded like a long string of Greek curses.

The policewoman looked at Maddie, exasperated. "So, let me get this straight. He robbed you and then what? Came back to take a nap?"

The policeman cleared his throat and turned to Mike. "Could you give us a list of what's missing, sir?"

Mike looked confused. "Well, nothing. I mean, he never actually left the apartment, so after we tied him up, we put it all back."

"So, you're not actually missing anything?" The policewoman said.

Maddie nodded. "That's right."

"So you weren't actually robbed?" The policeman continued.

"I guess... no. Not technically. No." Mike said.

The policewoman stared at him. "And you called us, because?"

"To invite you to our party," Maddie snapped. "Why do you think?"

"Can't you get him on breaking and entering, at least?" Mike said.

"And can you please take these handcuffs off? You can see he's alive." Maddie said.

Instead, the policeman took the mask off the burglar and prodded him awake.

The burglar opened his eyes and yelped. Then he looked around, confused. "What... This isn't my home. What am I doing here?"

"These people claim you were robbing them," The policeman said, drily.

The burglar shook his head, still sluggish from sleep. "I wouldn't do that Ossifers. Scout's honor. I would never rob anyone. I thought I was home." He tried to move his arm to make the Scout salute and the handcuff brought him up short. "Hey, what the heck? Who cuffed me?"

"Are you kidding me? You weren't robbing us? What do you call this?" Mike asked, kicking at a large, empty white sack.

"A giant laundry bag?" The burglar guessed. "I don't know dude, I've never seen it before."

"Oh, come on," Maddie snapped. "You don't remember telling us about how you can't hold a real job anymore, so you have to resort to robbing people?"

"Oh, wait. I do remember something..." He looked at Mike and Maddie and shuddered. "I remember you threatening to shoot me if I didn't stay quiet and then tying me up and forcing me to drink Nyquil. I thought it was a dream. Thank God you're here, officers. These people are crazy. Especially that one," he said, nodding at Maddie. "I want to press charges for... for kidnapping and... false imprisonment and... assault and... emotional blackmail."

"What?!" Maddie screeched.

The policewoman rolled her eyes and put her hand on Maddie's shoulder. "Let's all of us go down to the station and sort this out."

"But he's lying," Maddie said. "Tell them, Mike."

"Your word against mine, lady. Let a judge decide," the burglar said. "When he hears my story, I'll be vindicated."

"But we have proof!" Maddie said.

"No, we don't." Mike said. "Nope. No proof at all. Take us in."

"What?! Are you crazy?" Maddie shot him a look that any sane person would have thought twice about defying.

"Nope." Mike said.

Maddie looked around the bedroom for the camera, but it was nowhere to be seen.

"Come on, buddy." The policeman said, uncuffing the burglar from the bed, and then pulling the burglar's hands behind his back to re-cuff them. "You can tell us all about it and then sleep it off in the tank."

The cops walked to the door, the burglar, Mike and Maddie between them.

"You can't take those two to the station," Irini said. "You heard my daughter. That man's the criminal."

"If that's true, they'll be out in no time." The policewoman said.

"But she's a mother. She has to stay here with her daughter," Ruby chimed in.

"That's true," Rio said, holding Sophie up. "I don't know what to do with babies."

"Can't you just take my grandson instead?" Ruby said.

"Hey!" Mike protested.

"Sorry," said the policewoman. "It doesn't work that way."

"But it's almost midnight," Taki sputtered. "This is a very special year. Can't you just let them stay here to celebrate midnight?"

"Sorry, sir," the policeman said.

"Great. So, just because we took our stuff out of his loot bag, you're letting that criminal steal midnight from us." Maddie said, fuming.

"Looks that way," the policewoman said, opening the front door.

"Don't worry. I'll get bail money together and be right behind you," Rio called out as they left, the door shutting behind them.

"You gotta love this city," Nick said, shaking his head. "Where else would being the victim of a crime get you arrested?"

Rio turned to the room. "Okay, everyone pony up your wallets. How much do we have?"

She put Sophie back in her vibrating chair, and they all sat around the coffee table and threw in their cash. Between the six of them, they had about eight hundred dollars.

"I can go take care of it," Taki said, reaching for the money.

"No!" Rio said, snatching the cash and stuffing it in her pocket. If Taki and Irini went down to the jail, they'd get Mike and Maddie thrown in the slammer for sure. "It's late and it's really scummy down there. You'll get mugged. I'll go. Besides, someone needs to stay here with the baby."

"We can take the baby back to the hotel with us, if they want to go to the jail." Granny Ruby offered.

"Over my dead body," muttered Taki.

"You all can stay here with the baby. I'll go with Rio," Nick said.

Rio pulled him aside, so no one else would hear them. "No way. One of us needs to stay here and play referee. We don't want them killing each other or setting the place on fire. Or, worse, stealing the baby."

"I'd rather take my chances with the criminals," Nick muttered.

"Yeah, but I called dibs on it first," Rio said.

Apollo barked from the bathroom, and Nick let him out. He ran into the living room, looking for Mike and Maddie.

Seth called Apollo over and started petting him.

"Seth?" Rio asked. "Can you take Apollo out for his walk? I don't know how long it's going to take me to get Mike and Maddie out on bond."

"It'll be my honor," he said, seriously.

Rio had to swallow a smile, so she wouldn't hurt his feelings. He was being so serious. It was like he was being handed the crown jewels instead of a pooper-scooper and a leash.

Taki suddenly noticed the cheering on TV. "Look at that. The apple dropped. It's New Year's. Happy New Year's everybody."

"What are you talking about, happy?" Irini snapped. "Our daughter's in jail. This is a lousy New Year's."

"So's my grandson," Ruby said.

"He's a man. He should be in jail." Irini said. "It's this stupid city. I told them to move out of this city."

Apollo farted in agreement.

Rio sighed. "Don't anybody do anything drastic while I'm gone. I'll be back with Mike and Maddie as soon as I can. And please, get that dog out for his walk. There's something nasty going on in his gut."

Rio walked out of the apartment and crossed her fingers that the grandparents didn't join forces to kidnap and relocate the baby while she was bailing out Sophie's parents.

CHAPTER TWENTY