The Stranger Inside (27 page)

In fact, he didn’t even talk to me now. Just left a note with the cell phone.

Wiping away a tear, I punched the doctor’s number into the auto-dial. I knew the number by heart.

Now I just needed to wait for the shadows.

***

Two days later, I was waiting for Sawyer at his locker, my eyes darting here and there. Still no shadows. Not that I was
hoping
for them. But I was hoping Dr. Burk was for real. That he could help me. So I could get on with my life, shadow-free. And then, hopefully from there, Kenzie-free. The problem was, first I had to see the shadows.

“I have to stay for a make-up test,” Sawyer told me when he got to his locker.

“Oh.” I stared at him, bewildered because it was weird he didn’t tell me earlier, weird he had me meet him here instead of giving me a head’s up so I could catch a ride home with Micah.

But then I got it.

 ‘Cause he said, “Jeremy’s going to give you a ride.”

And then, there was Jeremy, right behind me. He gave me a wan smile, like
Sorry for the lame trick
. And it was a lame trick.
Sawyer’s
lame trick. His trick to make me talk with Jeremy, since I’d been avoiding him all week. But I couldn’t face him, couldn’t talk to him. Not just because of my resolve to stay away from him. It was more than that. I couldn’t stand knowing he felt stuck with me.

My heart was so not prepared for a conversation about that.

I glared at Sawyer, but he gave me a light kiss on the mouth, ignoring my anger. “Just talk,” he said.

Out in Jeremy’s car, I fidgeted near the passenger door, practically hugging it.

“I get it, Jodi,” Jeremy said. “You don’t want to talk to me. You don’t need to jump out of my car.”

I bit my lip, not saying anything. ‘Cause, yeah, I was acting dumb.

We rode all the way to my house in silence. But when we got there, I had an idea. It had been nagging at me for days, but now I had to do it, while Sawyer wasn’t around. Because, just like the Dr. Burk thing, he wouldn’t approve.

My palms were sweating, thinking about asking—especially because this was Jeremy. Jeremy. The guy who I’d resolved to avoid as much as possible.
This isn’t to stay close to him
, I promised myself.
It’s only because he has a car
.

Finally I asked, fidgeting with my rubber bands. “You know how the other day you asked if I wanted to go somewhere—that day after school?”

Jeremy tilted his head, searching my eyes. He nodded. “Yeah. I remember.”

 “Well, I do, today—want to go somewhere.”

Jeremy blinked. Then, without a question, he put his car in reverse and started to back out of the driveway.

“No, wait!” I said with a nervous laugh. “I need to get something first.”

I ran into the house and scrounged up every cent I could find—every cent. Luckily, I’d just cashed my paycheck. Too bad it was only thirty bucks.

“Where to?” Jeremy asked when I returned to his car, sweaty and out of breath.

“It’s over an hour away,” I said. “Is that okay?”

Jeremy backed out of my driveway.

***

When we got to the Psychic Center I was nervous. Jeremy took my sweaty palm in his warm hand and linked his fingers through mine, instantly calming me, though I was sure he only did it to stop me from messing with my rubber bands. He told the lady at the front desk I wanted to see a psychic.

“Do you have an appointment?” she said.

This place was so different than the Read Palm. It was in a big, fancy office building with a waiting room and couches and magazines. Like a huge multi-partnered-doctor’s office.

“No.”

She made a tsk sound, then leafed through her appointment book. “Hmmm. How about a week from Friday?”

My heart sank.

“No,” Jeremy said. “We need it today.”

She shook her head. “I’m sorry, I can’t. The week from Friday was me doing you a favor—cutting into people’s lunches. We’re booked solid for the month.”

Jeremy bit his lip. “We drove over an hour to get here.” He looked into her eyes. “We really need help.”

No one can resist Jeremy’s pleading eyes. Not even little old ladies.

She leaned in close. “Rita Franks is off this week—she just broke her ankle and can’t make it to work. She’s home.” The lady moved in even closer, talking confidential-like. “I’ll call her and tell her you’re coming.”

***

Rita Franks hobbled around her apartment, smiling and acting glad for company. She had Jeremy and me sit on her flowery couch and offered us tea. We both declined, not really tea drinkers.

She laughed at that and gestured toward her tiny kitchen, telling us she had thought about making a batch of cookies this morning, but then thought that was silly, she certainly didn’t need sweets sitting around while she couldn’t exercise. “Now I wish I had made them.” She winked. “Should have listened to that voice.”

 Finally she smiled. “Well, I guess you didn’t come all this way to hear an old lady prattle.”

She took dad’s ring, holding it tight. She’d been all sparkly and warm a moment ago. But now—whoa—she suddenly turned ashen. It made all the hairs on my arm stand on end.

Rita gasped in horror, throwing dad’s ring toward the door.

“Get out!” she screamed. “Get out
now
. Don’t come back. Don’t ever come back.”

My heart hammered against my chest, my throat constricting. What happened? What did she see?

Whatever it was, it was horrible. It had her terrified, just like The Read Palm lady.

Rita hobbled wildly to her bedroom, slamming the door.

“Get! Out!”

Jeremy looked at me, his eyes full of concern. “Jodi, what’s going on?”

I swallowed, shaking uncontrollably.

I had no idea.

CHAPTER 26

Ever since Trista left, we all paid extra attention to Micah, trying to keep him occupied, his mind off his lost love. This morning as Sawyer and I climbed the bleachers, we heard Jeremy offering to set Micah up with one of his girlfriend-wannabees. Jeremy didn’t even look at me as I sat down. It pricked my heart, though it was stupid to feel that way. So dumb! I’d been avoiding him again since the day the psychic freaked out. Not avoiding him like before. We weren’t in a fight. I didn’t make Sawyer hole up in a classroom anymore, away from his friends at lunch. Nothing like that. But Jeremy and I didn’t talk, and I avoided his eyes. Although every time I caught them, they seemed to be on me, full of concern.

That hurt though. Not as bad as if they were full of indifference or annoyance, but—they used to be full of love. Only … okay, sometimes they still seemed to be. Sometimes. Seemed to be. They seemed to be saying, “I love you, Jodi. Love you with all my heart.” Only, I knew that was just wishful thinking on my part. Me, holding on to a convoluted fantasy, still unable to let go of the past.

I didn’t want Jeremy to have to tell me again—or prove it again, like that Christmas—he’s over me. Intellectually, I got it. I did. So whenever I caught Jeremy’s eyes on me, I clung to Sawyer. Anything else would be emotional suicide. Besides, I always tried reminding myself I had Sawyer now—I should be over Jeremy.

“Trista and I are still together,” Micah explained, for the hundredth time. “We didn’t break up.”

“Yeah, but man, when are you ever going to see her again?” Zack asked. “It’s not like she moved across town—she’s across the continent. New York is about as far as you can get from here without leaving the country.”

Micah shrugged. “I don’t want to date anyone else. Not right now.”

I gave his arm a squeeze. “You still have us, Micah. We love you.”

“Yeah, I know.” He put his hand on mine. “Thanks.”

“My mom’s making a big Thanksgiving dinner,” I said. “Do you want to come?”

“Nah, my parents make a big deal about us spending the holidays together—you know, a family thing. But thanks.”

 I nodded. “Sure.”

I pretty much already knew before I invited him that he wouldn’t come, but I thought I’d give it a try, anyway. ‘Cause you never know. I glanced over at Zack. “How about you Zack? Jeremy and Sawyer will be there—do you want to come?”

“Oh.” Zack seemed surprised by the offer. “I can’t. Eve’s having me come to her house.” He gave me an odd look. “Thanks though.”

I’d thought maybe he would come. It didn’t seem like he had much of a home life. He never mentioned his parents—ever. Ever, ever, ever. And I hadn’t thought about him spending Thanksgiving with Eve. I had no idea she was still in his life at all, not after the big scratch thing.

When the bell rang, I saw Hanna in the halls. We almost collided. “Sorry Kenzie,” she murmured, pulling past me.

My heart stopped. I clutched her arm reflexively, my eyes bugging out of my head. “K-Kenzie?”

She turned white as a sheet and started backing away, just as she always did when she saw me. “I mean Jodi.”

Then she took off, running into the mob of students, literally ran to get away from me.

My heart pounded as I watched her go.

Sawyer took my hand, trying to calm me down. He smoothed back my hair. “I never told her anything. She doesn’t know.”

“But did you ever tell her my name was Kenzie?—like, back before, when you talked about me with the band?”

Sawyer tilted his head, thinking. Then shook it slowly. “I don’t think so. Because I wanted her to get you the job at Looks. She had to know your real name.”

I swallowed. The thing was, Hanna wasn’t the only person that got that scared look in their eyes when they saw me coming. I’d seen it in other people’s eyes now too. Like, the lady at The Read Palm. Now whenever I tried to go see her, she would get that exact same scared look—like I was the devil come to eat her children. And she wouldn’t let me in her building. She would beg me to go away. The same with the lady at the other psychic place, the one I went to after the Psychic Center. The lady there threw me out too, said she couldn’t let my “spirit in.”

All the psychic people were afraid of me.

A chill ran down my spine. “Hanna’s for real,” I whispered. “She’s psychic.”

Sawyer grinned, not believing in that stuff, not at all. He played with my hair again, winding a strand around his finger. “I love Hanna, I do. But she can’t read the future. Jodi, she lives in a shack. If she had ‘special powers,’ wouldn’t she get the lottery numbers right? Make herself rich?”

I didn’t know about any of that. Or care. All I knew was—I was scary. And crazy. And Dad, he was crazy too. Apparently, it was a genetic thing. We had some weird alternate “identities” inside us. Evil identities. And the psychics, they could tell. They knew to run.

Maybe everyone should do that—just run from me. How long did I have left? How long before I grabbed an axe?

***

The one person who definitely wasn’t afraid of me was Zack. I wasn’t sure what his deal was, but at lunch, I looked up to find him watching me. He kept doing it, even after I caught him. Then he started talking with Micah, but his eyes stayed on me. Sometimes I got the feeling he had a crush on me, but I wasn’t Zack’s type. He liked loud, pushy girls—like Eve. Maybe I just looked good to him, and his interest was nothing.

That’s what I usually told myself. But not today. Today, everything seemed sinister. ‘Cause, you know, I had a scary, evil identity inside me.

“You okay?” Sawyer ran his hand down my goose-fleshed arm. “You’re shaking.”

That made Zack furrow his brow and glance away, like he knew he was what caused my shivering.

“I’m just cold,” I murmured.

But everyone knew I was lying.

***

After lunch, I had to take a make-up quiz in Mr. Daniels’s class. I was tempted to just blow it off. Quizzes weren’t worth that much, and Mr. Daniels gave me the heebie-jeebies. I didn’t like to be alone with the guy. Not that he ever came on to me, but Trista once said he sort of “accidentally” rubbed up against her when they were alone. And I did see him kind of leer at girls sometimes. Not that the girls didn’t kind of flirt with him first. They did. For a teacher, he was kind of handsome, sort of, in an old-guy way. Still, yuck.

But I hated being in his classroom, too. There was something spooky about his class. Something shadowy-like. Only like I said, everything spooked me out these days. So, I couldn’t blow off things because I thought I saw shadows—or I’d blow off
everything
and curl up in a ball.

Turned out, I went ahead and took the quiz ‘cause Micah came with me as he needed to take it too. The semester was almost over. We needed every point we could get.

When we were finished, Sawyer was waiting for us outside the door. Lindsey (skank) was hanging on him, flirting with him like crazy, not even being semi-subtle about it. She left as soon as I came out, sneering at me—when Sawyer wasn’t paying attention. At least I knew her dirty looks weren’t about my “evil identity.” She wanted my boyfriend. She made that pretty clear.

I gritted my teeth. “So, did you ever find out what her ‘information’ was about?” I leaned against the lockers behind me. “Did you ‘get it out of her?’”

Sawyer grinned. “I like you jealous,” he said, taking my hand, kissing it. “But no. No information. She just dangles that around. I think she just wants attention.”

Duh.

At home, an email from Grey forced out all thoughts about Lindsey’s scheming, or Zack’s staring, or anything else that had happened. My palms started sweating before I finally found the nerve to click on the message. Then my heart sank as I read the email:

No, your dad didn’t have a patient named Kiki Jones—or anyone with the last name Jones. But I’ll keep looking into it. How are you doing? Is everything alright?

I couldn’t answer. Because what could I say? I could lie, I guess. But that was all I could do. Because everything wasn’t alright. Not even close. I had an evil identity lurking inside me. And I was scary.