The Perfect Emotion (24 page)

I rake my hands up the sides of her narrow hips up to her slender shoulders and run my knuckles across her cheeks wiping the moisture from her tears.  Kissing her isn’t an option right now and I think that it was maybe his plan when he sucker punched me. 

“Please don’t cry, beautiful.” Seeing her tears because of me hurts. At the same time it reminds me that she feels something for me and that she is mine. She pulls away and I step off the stool to follow her afraid she’s turning away from me. She stops at the end of the counter and pulls out a first aid kit. She blots some rubbing alcohol onto a clean white washcloth.

“This is going to sting,” she says and then bites at the bottom corner of her lip. It’s wrong, but it turns me on. “Sit back down and let me clean you up. You may need stitches,” she says, in the sweetest softest voice.

“Okay, but I’m not getting stitches.  I’ve had worse and it will heal.”  She raises an eyebrow at me and I know I’ll have to explain my past to her later.  “I’m just pissed I can’t kiss these lips,” I say, as I run my thumb across her lips and pull her bottom lip loose of her bite.

“Me too,” she whispers, and then the cloth hits my lip and the alcohol seeps right into the open cut.

“SHIT,” I yell out.  That stings horribly and I can feel tears prick my eyes.  I squeeze them tightly and pull back from her. 

“You could probably use a stitch or two, but I could make butterfly stitches if you want.  I’m sorry I know that stings, but it’s the best way to clean it up.”  I stand firm on not getting any stitches and let her finish up with butterfly stitches.  It’s almost damn near impossible to have her this close to my face and not kiss her.  I try to keep still while she works on my lip.  Her face is serious and intense as she tries to be as gentle as possible. 

Thinking about the look on my fathers face when he sees this almost makes me smile.  Part of me loves to give him a reason to push me away even more.  I walk a fine line with him, I always have, well since I was eleven.  He ensured that in our relationship.  Yet, I know how much appearances mean to him, his firm and all his political connections.  He already knows about Kate because Larkin told him, just like I thought he would. 

“Grant,
you need to forget about her.  She’s
obviously no good
and is causing more trouble than you need. 
Got it.”
  His stance stayed domineering and powerful like it always had when he talked to me.  Except it doesn’t work on me like it used to.  Now I’m taller than him and stronger.  He’s never hit me, but I think he still likes to put that fear in me.  The control he is used to enforcing on me never lightened up as I got older and more responsible.  Even as I
strayed
away from my fighting stage he never let up on me.  Things just became more strained and difficult in a different way. 

Larkin had told him everything about what happened with Kyle.  Of course, he told him about Kate and that I appeared to be in a relationship with her and defended her.  Dad wouldn’t hear any of that though.  Now
it’s
spring break and I caught him looking through my phone.  He could see the texts with Kate.  As pissed, as I was that he was going through my phone I was glad he knew that I was with Kate. 

“This is not up for debate, dad,” I said calmly, but didn’t waver. I didn’t let him see my nerves, not about Kate especially.

“Grant, don’t make me remind you.”  Oh yeah, here we go again… “You have a place in this firm, but you know your expectations,” he paused before he continued with the stipulations for my life to continue in his world.  “And as for your trust
fund don’t
think I can’t change that.”  It was always the same things.  I knew where things stood with him.  It made him feel he had a better handle on me and kept me in his control.  The thing is, as I got older I cared less and less about these things. 

“No need to remind me.  I know where I stand, but it doesn’t change the fact that I am with Kate.”  His face had started to get red and the lines multiplied on his forehead.  He rarely ever got like this with my half-sisters, but they never pushed back with him like I did … and still do.  And now they were on their own and married.  They had their own families.  Even still he tries to control them in different ways.   

“I’m not going to let you throw your life away over some middle-class girl who has gotten you in trouble with the law.  I can tell you right now she is not worth it.”  My anger began to get the best of me, but I knew I needed to ignore him.  This is what he wanted. 

“I’m this close to walking out of here. She’s worth it, trust me. Don’t make me pick between you two. You’ll lose.” I could see the shock hit him and instead of waiting for the backlash I turned to walk away, but just like always he had to get the last word in.

“Well, don’t forget Grant, this week will be very busy and you’ll be spending lots of time with Jessica. I’m sure she can remind you of your place.”

After Kate finishes up with my lip she gets me an ice pack for the bump above my eye.  Then she tells me to take off my dress shirt.  I eye her suspiciously, but she takes it and heads into the laundry room.  I follow behind her and tell her not to bother as she reaches for the stain stick in hopes of getting the blood off.  While she is busy with that I run out to my car to grab my gym bag to get a change of clothes. 

When I come back in I head straight into the bathroom to change.  Nothing is awkward between us, but we need to talk.  I know she has questions.  I want her to ask them though because I know how hard it is for her to face things.  I don’t want to force her to deal with any of this.  Rounding the corner back to the kitchen and family room area I stop in my tracks when I see her walking towards me.  She’s beautiful and I have to catch my breath.  It instantly reminds me that I really messed this up for tonight. 

“You still look beautiful. I’m not exactly date material looking like this now though. I’m sorry, I had a really nice night planned, but it’s going to have to wait. How mad are you?” She stops in front of me placing her hands on my cheeks and pulls me down closer to her so that she can examine my lip again. Placing a kiss to the side of my cut on my lip I lean in and loathe the punch that got in preventing me from kissing my girl.

“I’m not mad, but I don’t know what happened yet.  We need to talk about what happened.”  I can tell she’s scared to hear what I’ll have to say, but I’m proud of her for addressing it.  I know this isn’t going to be easy for her. 

“I was just waiting for you to ask … I knew you weren’t ready right away.” I break the distance between us and pull her into my chest. Running my hands up and down her back I restrain myself from pulling her dress up and wrapping her legs around me

“Can you drive?” She asks.

“Yes, why?”

“Come on, I have an idea for a different date tonight. My parents will be back soon anyway.” Her hands run down over the lower part of my back and settle on my ass. She gives me a squeeze and giggles while pulling away moving us towards the door. I wink and give her my best smile considering the state of my lip.

Pulling up to a small parking lot along the lake I shift into gear and pull into a spot facing the lake.  The moon is almost full and it reflects off the waves of the lake creating a long bright light.  The nearby tree branches rustle with the light breeze blowing.  Now that I’m in park my hands can find Katherine again.  Before I can reach over to hold her hand she beats me to it.  I love how her hand fits into mine and that when I rub her pinky I can visually see a spike in her breathing.  It’s in these little moments that I know I affect her like she does me.

When I turn to face her my eyes hit hers and I wish more than anything I could press my lips against hers. She smiles at me and then she bites that bottom corner of her lip. “This is where I come to run. I love to be along the lake… it’s where I get most of my thinking done. I thought since we couldn’t do the date you had planned I’d show you this place because it’s a big part of me,” she pauses and runs her finger over my bump above my eyebrow. “I thought we could talk and you could tell me what happened.”

“Okay,” I give her a second before I roll into it.  “I called Kyle and asked him to meet me today,” I say bluntly and straightforward.  She doesn’t cringe or flinch and her hand remains in mine, but her eyes are pressed closed tightly.  When she opens them she keeps them down. 
Shit
.  I brace myself for her reaction and do the only thing I can think of that might remind her that she is mine… I latch onto her pinky. Her breathing hitches for a split second before she talks.

“You shouldn’t have done that.  I don’t want you starting fights because of me.  It wasn’t your place, Reed.”  Damn it.  “I don’t want you getting hurt because of me.”  Even though we are as close as we can get in my small car it’s not enough.  I get up and out of my car.  When I get to her side I open her door and practically lift her up out of the car.  I take her to the front of the car and place her on the hood.  My dad would have a heart attack if he saw this, but I honestly don’t give a fuck.  Luckily, she has her wool coat on and it’s not too cold out.  Her dress hikes up exposing more of her thighs.  I grab onto the bottom of her knees forcing her legs to spread open.  She gasps and when I pull her closer to me wrapping her thighs around my hips.  I boldly run my hands under her dress over her now goose bumped thighs and graze my fingers along the fringe of her panties. 

“Reed,” she whispers into my neck.

“Katherine.” I hold onto her firmly, not wanting to separate from her. “I needed to be closer to you. That’s all I ever want. God, it is killing me that I can’t kiss you. I’m sure that’s exactly what Kyle wanted when he sucker punched me.”

“Tell me the rest.”

“Just don’t pull away from me, Katherine.”  I know my tone is even and confident, but I’m anything but that on the inside.  She doesn’t realize the affect she has on me.  The thought of her pushing me away again has me gripping her hips harder than I intend to.  She let’s out a little moan and presses herself into me more.  Damn, she turns me on so easily, but I shift myself because I need her to hear everything.

“I called Kyle and asked him to meet me to talk.  He agreed.  We met at a bowling ally parking lot near your house.  I really only had intentions of talking to him.  Asking him man to man to back off.  I told him that I was pressing you to file a restraining order and that must have set him off.  The next thing I knew he punched me in the mouth and then cocked back again right away and got me above the eye.”  Before I can finish she moves her hands under my coat and shirt into the top of my jeans.  Her fingers are cold, but I love that she is touching my bare skin.  This holding out thing is harder than I thought it would be.  I still want to make sure though that the next time we sleep together there is no possibility of her running from me.  I don’t think I could survive it again.

Her breathing has accelerated and I already know that I’ll spare her all the details.  She doesn’t need to know the shit he spat off. 

“Fuck off. I’m not backing off. She’s mine… I’ve had her since she was fifteen wrapped around my finger. I’m her first. You think you can come in and tell her what to do. I always get her.” I kept my distance from him knowing I couldn’t trust myself to not deck him on the spot.
  I didn’t like having to choose my next words carefully.  The thought of my fist slamming into his jaw provided minimal balance… I didn’t want to think about it, I wanted to take action.  Shifting my feet in the gravel lot my
fathers
voice broke through the red I was beginning to see.  Appearances, trust funds, my future career, cutting me off… all rattled in my head.  Then Kyle continued, “Don’t forget I know exactly what Kate feels like.  I know every curve of her body.  I’ve memorized it and know its perfection.”  I grit my teeth, clenched my fists and cussed under my breath. 
Mother fucker.
  I had to pace my breathing because I knew he was trying to rile me up.

“Listen Kyle, you need to man up.  She’s moved on.  You stalking and cornering her is not working in your
favor
.”  Kyle’s face had begun to turn beat red as he cracked his knuckles along the back of his neck.  “Let’s be clear on something though, you may have been her first, but I’ll be her last.  While you may think she is yours you are sadly mistaken.  I don’t tell Kate what to do, but one thing I have been pressing her to do is file a God damn restraining order against you.” 

My words sat in the air for no longer than a split second before Kyle came charging at me.  For some reason he caught me off guard and he grabbed at my shirt cocking back his other arm.  Before the blow came to my mouth and I knew I had to scratch plan A and go straight to plan B.   Most guys will act like taking a punch to the face doesn’t really hurt, that’s bullshit.  It burns, stings and hurts, but for me it’s an adrenaline rush.  The rush flooded me just like it always did in my adolescent years.  This fit perfectly with plan B.  Plan A was always to try to talk sense into him even though just the thought of him had always made me want to beat him to a bloody pulp.  I thought rationalization would hit him, but as soon as I saw his crazy eyes I knew it was a slim chance.  Plan B was to beat the shit out of him and get him to come after me going forward and in turn back off of Kate.  This wouldn’t end well for me in the sense that my father would probably take some of the drastic measures he always threatened.  I was distracted for a moment in my adrenaline high when he got in another blow to my upper eye.