The Masquerade (17 page)

My squeals turned into fits of laughter as his arms tightened around my back securely. "Ben, put me down!" It was odd being held by someone. I didn't look at myself as heavyweight or anything, but every girl saw herself as a larger size than she actually was. I hoped my
weight wasn't difficult, but he seemed to be at ease as he held me.

"No." He gave a devious smile, knowing I wouldn't be able to scramble out of his hold.

"Yes!" I shouted, laughing and pushing against his
chest. "Put me down."

He smirked. "I'll put you down, just kiss me." My eyes trailed down and I became surprised by the distance that was separating my
feet from ground. Ben laughed. "I'm stronger than you could possibly imagine, Ella. I'll hold you all night."

"I weigh more than you think." I challenged with raised eyebrows. His face was composed, showing no sign of strain in his
expression. He held me easily and the serious glint in his eyes told me he wasn't letting me down.

"You're perfect." He said and I nearly melted in the sincerity of his voice. I wouldn't be able to refuse when he asked me
again. I liked being chased, but I enjoyed the captivity of his arms more.

He knew what I wanted from him. "Kiss me," he said darkly, waiting for me to oblige.

I wrapped my arms around his neck. I stared into his eyes,
the humor disintegrated in them when he realized I was giving in. I leaned down and placed my lips to his. He reacted immediately, his lips claiming mine hungrily while he bounced me up to adjust my weight in his arms. I gasped into
his mouth, which evoked a moan from him in response.

Our lips still bound together, I felt my body being lowered. The grip he had on my waist loosened as I felt him lay my back gently against the grass. I opened my eyes when he pulled away for a brief moment. His hands
were outside my arms, pushed against the grass for support as he hovered over me. One of his knees bent in the gap between my legs while the other rested against the ground outside my left leg.

I smiled softly. My hand on the back of his neck, I pulled his face down to mine. Our lips collided, continuing the fervent embrace we shared before. His body brushed over mine as we kissed, sending waves of heat in my body below the waist.

One his hands slid down the curve of my waist and moved underneath the hem of my shirt. I sighed against his lips, feeling his calloused fingers trace small patterns on my skin.

He muttered something like, "Soft
"
against
my cheek, his breath caressing my skin. His hands ran further up over my breasts. His touch coaxed moans from me that he claimed with his mouth as he kissed me harder. His kisses became hard as they crashed over my lips, my neck,
below my ears. Anywhere he could reach, his kisses seemed almost vital to his survival.

In Ben's presence, time ceased to exist. When he pulled away, I had no recollection of how long his lips preoccupied mine. It could
have been minutes or hours, I lay beneath him, dazed. My chest heaved as I stared up at the night sky with parted lips. My eyes wandered over each star while I allowed my breathing to even. Ben leaned back, his eyes, darkened with lust, still held mine captive. He was smiling as he watched me lay underneath
him, blanketed with warmth and clouded by bliss.

He rolled beside me so that he lay next to me, staring up at the stars, his hand grazing over mine. I listened to his steady breathing. He
was perfectly composed. He had no trouble pulling himself together after a kiss like
that.

I sat up and stared down at him incredulously. His gaze flicked to mine. He took in my expression with a smirk and an arched eyebrow.
"Lots of practice." He said, reading my mind.

My hand lightly hit his chest. He laughed, a deep and rich sound that I found to be mesmerizing. It was difficult not to be entranced by his voice. I adjusted my sitting position to face the water, noting each of the
stars slightly distorted reflection due to the ripples caused by the breeze that brushed over the water.

I felt Ben's large hand on my back, his fingers slowly traced over the fabric of my shirt. I almost jumped at the frigid touch, as
though there was nothing separating his skin from mine. He chuckled at my response, but said nothing while I relaxed into his touch. He was always cold, but his touch spread warmth underneath my skin that radiated throughout my body. It was
amazing.

It was in that moment that I knew. I didn't just have a
thing
for Ben. It was more, so much more than that. I would never be the same. I craved his touch. The feeling of his lips on my neck was imprinted in my skin.
I could still feel them running over my collarbone. I wanted him again. I would always want him. I had only known him for a short amount of time. I knew absolutely nothing about him, other than what I read on the Internet, but it
didn't matter. Together, we made sense. I couldn't see myself ever being with anyone else. It was Ben and it always would be, but I wondered if I would ever really know him.

"Ben?"

"Hmm?" He managed to say, his voice raspy. His
attention was clearly elsewhere. The dirty part of my mind kicked in and wondered where his thoughts were pulling him.

"Tell me something about you."

I caught his hesitation, even after he tried to hide it.
"Like what?"

"Like your family, where you grew up, do you have any pets?" I shrugged. "Tell me something, anything."

He was quiet for a moment. When he spoke his words weren't
open the way someone would eagerly tell their life story to a crowd of uninterested listeners feigning fascination. He stated facts, like they were rehearsed.

"I had parents, an older sister, Rebecca. I was close
to them. I fought with Rebecca a lot, but I secretly looked up to her. Above everything else, she taught me to cherish the people I loved because they wouldn't be around forever." His hand froze on my back. "They
died."

I turned to him, my eyes wide. "All of them?"

He nodded and sat up as he said, "It was a long time ago." His eyes moved to the sky, his thoughts far off. Sensing my empathy,
he turned to me, his expression softened. "And you?"

My gaze turned back to the water. The lump in my throat returned. It nearly killed me to think of my brother and I absolutely hated my father. His absence hurt too. I envied Ben's ability to shut off the pain. He
didn't seem bothered when he mentioned his family, but I saw behind the mask he so carefully devised.

"I live with my mom." I said quietly.

His arms wrapped around me. He pulled me into his lap and I
molded myself to his form. His lips touched my neck when he whispered, "You don't have to tell me."

I tilted my head up so that I could meet his gaze, "Even after I asked," he silenced me with peck on my lips that was
intended to be quick, but drawled into a slow kiss that I refused to let him pull away from.

"I wanted you to know," he whispered against my lips.

"And I want you to know about me too," I said pulling away so that I could look into his eyes. "It's just hard for me to talk about it."

He nodded. "I know. You can tell me whenever it feels
right and I'll do whatever it takes to make it painless." I smiled pulling an image of us together, in bed, tangled between sheets. I would tell him everything as he ran his fingers through my hair. The thought was more than tempting.

"Whatever it takes?" I asked lightly.

He nodded and gave me a quick kiss. "Whatever it takes."

"Clothes won't be required."

"Don't go there," he muttered darkly into my ear.
"I'll take you right here in the woods if you keep talking like that me."

I shuddered. "Why is that turning me on?"

He leaned his forehead into mine. I watched him squeeze his
eyes shut. I imagined him trying to flush whatever image he had in his head that was tempting him. My hands found their way underneath his shirt. I dragged my fingers over his chest, listening in satisfaction to his shallow groans.

"Don't," he told me sternly, but I ignored him and continued my pursuit.

When my hands neared the hem of his shirt he snatched them away, holding my wrists in his hands to restrain me. His eyes hardened as they
bore into mine. "I'm trying to be good."

I moistened my bottom lip with my tongue. "I don't want you to be good," I pouted, my voice dropping a notch. "Be bad to me."

His eyes widened for a second before he shook his head,
composing himself. "You're going to pay for that." I assumed he meant right away but he suddenly stood up and pulled me to my feet with him. He laughed at the sight of my disappointment and wrapped his arms around my waist,
pulling me against his chest.

"You've told me over and over that you know nothing about me. I tell you a little about my family and you want to get in my pants," he remarked in amusement.

I rolled my eyes. "Most guys wouldn't hesitate to my request."

"If you were just some other girl I wouldn't. But you're not and if you were, you wouldn't be here right now." His emphasis
of here was referring to more than just the sacred place he brought me to. I didn't question it. I knew I wouldn't get a satisfying answer.

I leaned my head against his chest allowing myself to lean into his embrace. There wasn't another place in the world I could have felt
more at home than in Ben's arms. Everything I knew and everything I believed was changing faster than I could comprehend. My guard was down and I didn't care.

I didn't believe in love, but now I was beginning to think I
just never wanted to believe in it. I was feeling things I never felt before. I desired him in a way that I thought was only found in movies. The contact of his skin against mine wasn't enough. I craved more to the point of starvation.
Every second that passed with him was greater than the last.

I was in love.

His arms tightened around me. "I lived in New York City for most of my life. My mother was a closet musician. She encouraged me to tap
into my music genes before I learned how to walk. When they died I had nothing left so I moved here for a while to seclude myself in my music. That's how I found this place."

I smiled and whispered softly, "Music saved you."

I felt him shake his head. "It healed me." He pressed his lips into my hair. "I don't have any pets because I'm always on tour, but there is a cat that hangs around my house in L.A. I don't like
cats but we've come to a mutual understanding."

I laughed, picturing a six-foot something rock star chasing a stubborn cat out of his house. "What's his name?"

"Punk."

I laughed and lifted my head to meet his gaze. His smile was wide and his blue eyes were open, staring down at me in the same admiration I saw a few nights before. I fell in love with that look, somehow knowing he saved it only for me.

His hands slid down my arms. One of them took mine, and our fingers instantly entwined. He took a step back and led me over the bridge and to the opening in the forest where we had come from. I didn't want to go home, but it was still a school night and I had two tests tomorrow.

"I'm all about black, but my favorite color is lime green." My eyebrows rose in surprise. He looked over his shoulder as though he expected that reaction. He laughed. "I drink more cups of coffee
than I can count. I like pizza with everything on it and wild berry pop tarts are my weakness."

I giggled. "Good to know."

"I think Kurt Cobain was a legend, but my favorite band
is Brand New." He turned to me. "I found them on your music playlist and I'd be lying if I said it didn't turn me on."

Something in my stomach flipped over. Before I could hesitate I sang my favorite lyrics from Brand New. "
Well take me, take
me back to your bed
," I sang lightly. "
I love you so much that it hurts my head. Say I don't mind you under my skin. I'll let the bad parts in, the bad parts in
."

Ben joined in with me, his raspy voice a stark contrast to
mine. "
When we were made we were set apart. Life is a test and I get bad marks. Now some saint got the job of writing down my sins.
"

"
The storm is coming
," I sang.

Ben carried the repeat, matching the lead singer's rugged scream. "
The storm is coming.
"

I didn't carry into the next final chorus. Ben tugged my hand and I was pulled against his side. In one swift motion, he tilted my chin
up with his thumb and kissed me like he had before when I was beneath him. "Your voice is mesmerizing." I heard him say against my lips before he pulled away.

My cheeks warmed and I looked away to hide my smile. Even
though I was past Ben the awkward stage of being in the presence of a rock star, it was still a huge deal receiving that sort of compliment from an amazing musician.

"Ditto," I told him, holding my smile.

We slipped into the woods, hand in hand, leaving the serenity of the night behind us. Ben moved carefully, strategically choosing paths that were easier for me to follow, avoiding the decrepit logs and tangled
vines with protruding thorns. Ben raised our entwined hands and kissed the back of my hand. I turned to him, pressing my lips together to hide the giddy smile that I felt exploding within me.

"Your turn." Ben said, his blue eyes piercing
mine.

"Okay," I faced forward again. "I'm a Parkway Drive fan and besides yours, my favorite concert was Chelsea Grin, but I also worship Lana Del Rey and Amy Lee. I actually love coffee and pizza,
specifically buffalo chicken pizza and my mom reminds constantly that I put too much sweetener in my coffee, but I tend to pour double behind her back."

Ben laughed. "You eat cotton candy ice cream for
dinner,"

"Never without sprinkles," I interrupted, secretly gloating in the fact that he remembered the ice cream I ordered that night.