Read The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) Online
Authors: WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
Yes, madam, I seem to be sad.
THURIO
Seem you that you are not?
Do you think you are not sad?
VALENTINE
Haply I do.
Perhaps I am.
THURIO
So do counterfeits.
So are liars.
VALENTINE
So do you.
So are you.
THURIO
What seem I that I am not?
What did I do to seem that way?
VALENTINE
Wise.
You’re wise
THURIO
What instance of the contrary?
What proof is there against that?
VALENTINE
Your folly.
Your mistakes.
THURIO
And how quote you my folly?
And what mistake did you notice?
VALENTINE
I quote it in your jerkin.
I notice it in your jacket.
THURIO
My jerkin is a doublet.
My jacket is a coat.
VALENTINE
Well, then, I'll double your folly.
Well, then, that’s twice the mistake.
THURIO
How?
How so?
SILVIA
What, angry, Sir Thurio! do you change colour?
What, are you angry, Sir Thurio! Do you change moods like that?
VALENTINE
Give him leave, madam; he is a kind of chameleon.
Let him go, madam; he changes moods like a chameleon changes color.
THURIO
That hath more mind to feed on your blood than live
You had better make sure that you take care of your body rather than live
in your air.
In your head.
VALENTINE
You have said, sir.
You speak the truth, sir.
THURIO
Ay, sir, and done too, for this time.
Yes, sir, and done with that too, for now.
VALENTINE
I know it well, sir; you always end ere you begin.
I know how you do that, sir; you always end before you begin.
SILVIA
A fine volley of words, gentlemen, and quickly shot off.
A fine combat of words, gentlemen, and quickly fired.
VALENTINE
'Tis indeed, madam; we thank the giver.
It was indeed, madam; we thank the one who gave us that battle.
SILVIA
Who is that, servant?
Who would that be, my follower?
VALENTINE
Yourself, sweet lady; for you gave the fire. Sir
You, sweet lady; for you gave us the reason to. Sir
Thurio borrows his wit from your ladyship's looks,
Thurio borrows his intelligence from your looks, my lady,
and spends what he borrows kindly in your company.
And spends his borrowed intelligence lovingly when you’re around.
THURIO
Sir, if you spend word for word with me, I shall
Sir, if you trade words with me, I will
make your wit bankrupt.
Empty out your intelligence.
VALENTINE
I know it well, sir; you have an exchequer of words,
I know that, sir; you have a bank account filled with words,
and, I think, no other treasure to give your
And, I think, no other currency to give to your
followers, for it appears by their bare liveries,
Servants, since by the look of their shabby uniforms,
that they live by your bare words.
They are paid with only your words.
SILVIA
No more, gentlemen, no more:--here comes my father.
Stop it, gentlemen, stop it—here comes my father.
Enter DUKE
DUKE
Now, daughter Silvia, you are hard beset.
Now, my daughter Silvia, you are sincerely surrounded by men.
Sir Valentine, your father's in good health:
Sir Valentine, your father is in good health:
What say you to a letter from your friends
What would you say to a letter from you friends
Of much good news?
With a lot of good news?
VALENTINE
My lord, I will be thankful.
My lord, I would be thankful
To any happy messenger from thence.
Of any messenger with good news from them.
DUKE
Know ye Don Antonio, your countryman?
Do you know, Don Antonio, a man from your same homeland?
VALENTINE
Ay, my good lord, I know the gentleman
Yes, my good lord, I know that gentlemen
To be of worth and worthy estimation
To be of wealth and high esteem
And not without desert so well reputed.
And he’s not so well respected without cause.
DUKE
Hath he not a son?
Does he have a son?
VALENTINE
Ay, my good lord; a son that well deserves
Yes, my good lord; a son that also deserves
The honour and regard of such a father.
The honor and affection of a father like Don Antonio.
DUKE
You know him well?
Do you know him well?
VALENTINE
I know him as myself; for from our infancy
I know him as well as I know myself; because since we were babies
We have conversed and spent our hours together:
We have been friends and spent our days together:
And though myself have been an idle truant,
And though I have been an lazy shirker,
Omitting the sweet benefit of time
Forgetting about the sweet benefit that time provides
To clothe mine age with angel-like perfection,
To supply my old age with angel-like perfection,
Yet hath Sir Proteus, for that's his name,
Sir Proteus, for that’s his name, has instead
Made use and fair advantage of his days;
Made improvements and good use of his time;
His years but young, but his experience old;
He is still young, but he has the experience of someone older;
His head unmellow'd, but his judgment ripe;
His head shows no grey hairs, but his judgment is mature;
And, in a word, for far behind his worth
And, in short, for his worth is far beyond
Comes all the praises that I now bestow,
All the praises I am giving him now,
He is complete in feature and in mind
He is accomplished in looks and in mind
With all good grace to grace a gentleman.
With all the good grace that a gentleman should have.
DUKE
Beshrew me, sir, but if he make this good,
Curse me, sir, but if he is this good
He is as worthy for an empress' love
He is worthy of the love of an empress
As meet to be an emperor's counsellor.
And suitable to me an emperor’s advisor.
Well, sir, this gentleman is come to me,
Well, sir, this gentleman has come to me
With commendation from great potentates;
With recommendations from very powerful rules;
And here he means to spend his time awhile:
And he means to spend some time here for a while:
I think 'tis no unwelcome news to you.
I think this is welcome news to you.
VALENTINE
Should I have wish'd a thing, it had been he.
If I had wished for such a thing, it would be for him to come.
DUKE
Welcome him then according to his worth.
Then welcome him according to his importance.
Silvia, I speak to you, and you, Sir Thurio;
Silvia, I am talking to you, and you, Sir Thurio, when I say that;
For Valentine, I need not cite him to it:
Because I don’t need to urge Valentine to do that:
I will send him hither to you presently.
I will send him to you here shortly.
Exit
VALENTINE
This is the gentleman I told your ladyship
This is the gentleman that I told your lady ship about who
Had come along with me, but that his mistress
Would have come along with me, except that his mistress
Did hold his eyes lock'd in her crystal looks.
Kept him there chained to her beauty.
SILVIA
Belike that now she hath enfranchised them
Perhaps now she has freed him
Upon some other pawn for fealty.
For some other oath of loyalty.
VALENTINE
Nay, sure, I think she holds them prisoners still.
No, I’m sure, I think she hold him prisoner still.
SILVIA
Nay, then he should be blind; and, being blind
No, then he should be blind; and, being blind,
How could he see his way to seek out you?
How could he see his way to find you?
VALENTINE
Why, lady, Love hath twenty pair of eyes.
Why, lady, Love has twenty pairs of eyes.
THURIO
They say that Love hath not an eye at all.
They say that Love is blind.
VALENTINE
To see such lovers, Thurio, as yourself:
Love is when he sees such lovers as yourself, Thurio:
Upon a homely object Love can wink.
He can close his eyes to an ugly man.
SILVIA
Have done, have done; here comes the gentleman.
Stop it, stop it; here comes the gentleman.
Exit THURIO
Enter PROTEUS
VALENTINE
Welcome, dear Proteus! Mistress, I beseech you,
Welcome, dear Proteus! Mistress, I ask you, please
Confirm his welcome with some special favour.
Back up his welcome wit some special honor.
SILVIA
His worth is warrant for his welcome hither,
His worth is permission enough for his welcome here,
If this be he you oft have wish'd to hear from.
If this the man you have often wanted to hear from.
VALENTINE
Mistress, it is: sweet lady, entertain him
Mistress, it is: sweet lady, employ him
To be my fellow-servant to your ladyship.
To be a your follower like me, your lady.
SILVIA
Too low a mistress for so high a servant.
I am to lowly a mistress for such a respected follower.
PROTEUS
Not so, sweet lady: but too mean a servant
That’s not true, sweet lady: I am too unworthy a follower
To have a look of such a worthy mistress.
To look upon such a lovely mistress.
VALENTINE
Leave off discourse of disability:
Stop talking of your inadequacies:
Sweet lady, entertain him for your servant.
Sweet lady, take him on as your follower.
PROTEUS
My duty will I boast of; nothing else.
I will brag about my duties as a follower; nothing else.
SILVIA
And duty never yet did want his meed:
And duty has never lacked a rewardL
Servant, you are welcome to a worthless mistress.