The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) (570 page)

didn't throw me overboard to find my mother!

Bawd

Why lament you, pretty one?

Why are you so sad, pretty one?

MARINA

That I am pretty.

Because I am pretty.

Bawd

Come, the gods have done their part in you.

Come now, the gods have favoured you.

MARINA

I accuse them not.

I don't blame them.

Bawd

You are light into my hands, where you are like to live.

You have fallen into my hands, which is where you are going to live.

MARINA

The more my fault

To scape his hands where I was like to die.

The worse luck for  me

that I escaped the hands whereby I was going to die.

Bawd

Ay, and you shall live in pleasure.

Yes, and you will have a life of pleasure.

MARINA

No.

No.

Bawd

Yes, indeed shall you, and taste gentlemen of all

fashions: you shall fare well; you shall have the

difference of all complexions. What! do you stop your ears?

Yes, you certainly will, and sample gentlemen of all

types: you will do well; you'll have men of

every race. What's this! Are you blocking your ears?

MARINA

Are you a woman?

Are you a woman?

Bawd

What would you have me be, an I be not a woman?

What do you think I am, if I'm not a woman?

MARINA

An honest woman, or not a woman.

If you're not honest, you're not a woman.

Bawd

Marry, whip thee, gosling: I think I shall have

something to do with you. Come, you're a young

foolish sapling, and must be bowed as I would have

you.

Why, be damned to you, greenhorn: I can see

I'll have trouble with you. Come on, you're a young

foolish sapling, and I shall have to bend you

to the shape I desire.

MARINA

The gods defend me!

May the gods defend me!

Bawd

If it please the gods to defend you by men, then men

must comfort you, men must feed you, men must stir

you up. Boult's returned.

Re-enter BOULT

Now, sir, hast thou cried her through the market?

If the gods decide to defend you through men, then men

must comfort you, men must feed you, men must

get you going.  Boult's back.

Now, sir, have you advertised her in the market?

BOULT

I have cried her almost to the number of her hairs;

I have drawn her picture with my voice.

I have described her as minutely as you could wish;

I have painted a picture of her with my voice.

Bawd

And I prithee tell me, how dost thou find the

inclination of the people, especially of the younger sort?

So please, tell me, what sort of interest did you get

from the people, particularly the younger ones?

BOULT

'Faith, they listened to me as they would have

hearkened to their father's testament. There was a

Spaniard's mouth so watered, that he went to bed to

her very description.

By God, they listened to me as closely as they would have

listened to their father's will. There was a

Spaniard who was so hungry for her, he was almost

sleeping with her description.

Bawd

We shall have him here to-morrow with his best ruff on.

He'll be here tomorrow in his best outfit.

BOULT

To-night, to-night. But, mistress, do you know the

French knight that cowers i' the hams?

Tonight, tonight. But, mistress, you know the

French  knight, the diseased one?

Bawd

Who, Monsieur Veroles?

Who, Monsieur Veroles?

BOULT

Ay, he: he offered to cut a caper at the

proclamation; but he made a groan at it, and swore

he would see her to-morrow.

Yes, him: he danced with excitement at the

announcement; then he gave a groan, and swore

he would see her tomorrow.

Bawd

Well, well; as for him, he brought his disease

hither: here he does but repair it. I know he will

come in our shadow, to scatter his crowns in the

sun.

Good, good; as for him, he brought his disease

with him: he just tops it up here. I know he will

come into our house, and chuck his money around.

BOULT

Well, if we had of every nation a traveller, we

should lodge them with this sign.

Well, if we had a traveller from every nation on earth,

they would all want to have a go at her.

Bawd

[To MARINA] Pray you, come hither awhile. You

have fortunes coming upon you. Mark me: you must

seem to do that fearfully which you commit

willingly, despise profit where you have most gain.

To weep that you live as ye do makes pity in your

lovers: seldom but that pity begets you a good

opinion, and that opinion a mere profit.

Now you, come here for a moment. You

have a fortune coming to you. Mark my words: you must

pretend that you are reluctant to do what you do

willingly, and to hate the profits even as you make them.

You must weep about your life, which will create pity

in your lovers: it's not often that pity gets you

goodwill, and that goodwill will be sheer profit.

MARINA

I understand you not.

I don't understand you.

BOULT

O, take her home, mistress, take her home: these

blushes of hers must be quenched with some present practise.

Oh, take her home, mistress take her home: this

shyness must be knocked out of her with practice.

Bawd

Thou sayest true, i' faith, so they must; for your

bride goes to that with shame which is her way to go

with warrant.

By God you're telling the truth, it must; the

bride goes with shame to the thing that it is

lawful for her to do.

BOULT

'Faith, some do, and some do not. But, mistress, if

I have bargained for the joint,--

Well, some do and some do not. But, mistress, as

I have prepared the joint–

Bawd

Thou mayst cut a morsel off the spit.

Yes, you can have a slice.

BOULT

I may so.

I will do so.

Bawd

Who should deny it? Come, young one, I like the

manner of your garments well.

Who would refuse it you? Come on, young one, I like

the cut of your clothes.

BOULT

Ay, by my faith, they shall not be changed yet.

Yes, by God, they shall not be changed yet.

Bawd

Boult, spend thou that in the town: report what a

sojourner we have; you'll lose nothing by custom.

When nature framed this piece, she meant thee a good

turn; therefore say what a paragon she is, and thou

hast the harvest out of thine own report.

Boult, tell it all round the town: report who

we have staying here; you'll get a profit from the customers.

When nature made this girl, she did you a good

turn; so tell everyone how wonderful she is, and you

will get a reward from your reports.

BOULT

I warrant you, mistress, thunder shall not so awake

the beds of eels as my giving out her beauty stir up

the lewdly-inclined. I'll bring home some to-night.

I guarantee you, mistress, the dirty minded

will be more excited by my reports of her beauty

than a bed of eels stirred up by a storm. I'll bring some home tonight.

Bawd

Come your ways; follow me.

Come along; follow me.

MARINA

If fires be hot, knives sharp, or waters deep,

Untied I still my virgin knot will keep.

Diana, aid my purpose!

If I can find a hot fire, a sharp knife, or deep water,

I shall preserve my virginity.

Diana, help me!

Bawd

What have we to do with Diana? Pray you, will you go with us?

Exeunt

What's Diana got to do with us? You just come along with me.

Enter CLEON and DIONYZA

DIONYZA

Why are you foolish? Can it be undone?

Why are you being so stupid? Can it be changed?

CLEON

O Dionyza, such a piece of slaughter

The sun and moon ne'er look'd upon!

Oh Dionyza, there was never such a murder

in the history of the world!

DIONYZA

I think

You'll turn a child again.

 I think

you're becoming like a child again.

CLEON

Were I chief lord of all this spacious world,

I'ld give it to undo the deed. O lady,

Much less in blood than virtue, yet a princess

To equal any single crown o' the earth

I' the justice of compare! O villain Leonine!

Whom thou hast poison'd too:

If thou hadst drunk to him, 't had been a kindness

Becoming well thy fact: what canst thou say

When noble Pericles shall demand his child?

If I ruled the whole wide world,