The Click Trilogy (70 page)
Authors: Lisa Becker
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:00 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
Believe me, it's "lays" ahead as in "he's getting laid."
From: Renee Greene – March 24, 2014 – 2:03 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Call me!
Well done, my friend. But what did you need to talk with me about? Certainly it was not the fact that you and your husband are going to consummate your marriage. That's a given.
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:05 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
The marriage has already been consummated. We took care of that in the bathroom at the restaurant.
From: Renee Greene – March 24, 2014 – 2:06 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Call me!
Really?!? You don't think that's TMI?
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:09 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
Just because I'm married doesn't mean I've changed. But, like you most of the time, I digress. You will NOT believe who I bumped into at the airport.
From: Renee Greene – March 24, 2014 – 2:15 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Call me!
Hmmm. Let's see. You are flying from Las Vegas to Italy. Andrea Bocelli?
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:17 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
That is actually an outstanding guess. Wrong. But well thought out and perfectly plausible. No, I bumped into Jason Kite.
From: Renee Greene – March 24, 2014 – 2:18 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Call me!
What? How? Where? Huh?
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:19 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
Oh, how I wish I could see your face right now.
From: Renee Greene – March 24, 2014 – 2:20 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Call me!
Don't keep me in suspense. Details, please.
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:24 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
Nick and I were hanging out in the first class lounge because, well, that's how we roll. Jason was there waiting on a flight to London. He recognized me, walked over and said hello. Given his penchant for gushing over celebrities, Nick was quite impressed that I was friends with a famous rock star. He asked how you were doing.
From: Renee Greene – March 24, 2014 – 2:31 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Call me!
Of course he recognized you after the major display that you and his drummer put on a while back. And with touring rock stars, and the groupies that must follow them, that's saying a lot! So, Jason asked about me? What did he say? What did you say?
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:35 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
Of course he asked about you. He wanted to know how you were doing, if you were seeing anyone, etc.
From: Renee Greene – March 24, 2014 – 2:37 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Call me!
He asked if I was seeing someone? What did you say?
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:41 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
I told him you were engaged to Ethan, the man you were dating when he tried to woo you back. And that you were getting married in a few months.
From: Renee Greene – March 24, 2014 – 2:42 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Call me!
What did he say?
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:42 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
He said he was happy for you and wished you well.
From: Renee Greene – March 24, 2014 – 2:43 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Call me!
Whoa! How is he doing? Is he seeing anyone?
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:44 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
I didn't ask. Didn't seem to be my place.
From: Renee Greene – March 24, 2014 – 2:45 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Call me!
Since when has that ever stopped you?
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:46 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
True. Maybe being an old married lady is mellowing me out.
From: Renee Greene – March 24, 2014 – 2:47 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Call me!
Don't let that ever change you!
From: Shelley Manning – March 24, 2014 – 2:51 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Call me!
You're right. The restroom is free. Let me see if Nick wants to consummate our marriage again…at 30,000 feet. I'll call you when I'm back from our trip. Mwah! Mwah!
From: Mark Finlay – March 27, 2014 – 10:53 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Shelley Withdrawals?
Hey, there. I know Shelley is on her honeymoon right now and you are probably going through withdrawals.
So I thought I would offer up my services. I'm happy to make inappropriate comments, mock people, come up with silly nicknames and eat cupcakes. I draw the line at a pedicure, but considering she lives in Seattle now, I'm not sure you two do that anyway.
From: Renee Greene – March 27, 2014 – 11:15 AM
To: Mark Finlay
Subject: Re: Shelley Withdrawals?
Well, aren't you just the best girlfriend a gal could have? Tee hee! Seriously, you are so sweet. It has been hard not to have her around. Plus I'm insanely jealous that she's in Italy right now. Sounds fab!
But honestly, ever since she moved to Seattle, I'm learning to handle more on my own. I'm not always successful at it, evidenced by some recent spats, bouts of friendship paranoia and excessive chocolate eating. But I'm working on it. A girl has to grow up sometime, right? But I so appreciate you checking in on me.
From: Mark Finlay – March 27, 2014 – 11:22 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Shelley Withdrawals?
That is indeed what friends are for. You've been so wonderful in my time of need that I just wanted to return the favor. Let me know if you need anything and let's make some plans soon.
From: Renee Greene – March 27, 2014 – 11:26 AM
To: Mark Finlay
Subject: Re: Shelley Withdrawals?
Sounds great. I'll give you a call next week and we'll set something up. Thanks again!
From: Renee Greene – April 1, 2014 – 9:41 AM
To: Ashley Gordon
Subject: Catholic Question
This is no April Fool's joke! I was trying on some wedding dresses with my mom yesterday. The saleswoman brought in this very puffy dress which looked terrible on me. Through the curtain I told her that maybe it was because I had a cupcake earlier that day. All of a sudden I felt like I was in a confessional! Is that what it's like?
From: Ashley Gordon – April 1, 2014 – 10:02 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Catholic Question
That's pretty funny. Yes, that is indeed what it's like. You say your sins aloud and then face the judgment. Don't mean to sound harsh, but why are you eating cupcakes months before your wedding?
From: Renee Greene – April 1, 2014 – 10:04 AM
To: Ashley Gordon
Subject: Re: Catholic Question
Stress eating for sure. There's another sin I can confess too. ;)
From: Renee Greene – April 6, 2014 – 9:00 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Benvenuti a casa!
(That's welcome home in Italian.) Hope you and Nick had the most incredible time in Italy on your (agh!) honeymoon. Can't wait to hear all about your adventures. Strike that! Can't wait to hear all about your G-rated, travel adventures. The X-rated, honeymoon adventures you can keep to yourself.
From: Shelley Manning – April 6, 2014 – 10:02 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Benvenuti a casa!
Really? You're not the least bit curious about my honeymoon escapades? The more I think about it, I don't think you could handle it.
From: Renee Greene – April 6, 2014 – 10:06 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Benvenuti a casa!
Really? What if I pulled a Tom Cruise "I want the truth" (a la A Few Good Men) on you. Would you scream out, "You can't handle the truth"?
From: Shelley Manning – April 6, 2014 – 10:08 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Benvenuti a casa!
I would indeed! I could totally pull off that monologue.
From: Renee Greene – April 6, 2014 – 10:12 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Benvenuti a casa!
I have no doubt you could pull it off. You're married. Married! I still can't believe you are married. And you planned it all within a month. Being in the midst of my own wedding planning (hurrah!), it's hard to believe you did it all so quickly. Shouldn't surprise me, though. You truly are amazing.
From: Shelley Manning – April 6, 2014 – 10:16 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Benvenuti a casa!
Why do in a year what I can just cram into a month, Sweetie? I'm just being efficient with my time.
From: Renee Greene – April 6, 2014 – 10:19 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Benvenuti a casa!
I just feel badly that I wasn't able to throw you a shower or a bachelorette party. I always said I would do those things for you.
From: Shelley Manning – April 6, 2014 – 10:21 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Benvenuti a casa!
Bullshit! You never thought I would get married.
From: Renee Greene – April 6, 2014 – 10:23 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Benvenuti a casa!
How dare you! ;) With comments like that, you're on thin ice.
From: Shelley Manning – April 6, 2014 – 10:27 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Benvenuti a casa!
Then let's skate! I am excited to share all of the trip details with you. But I've got to work before I can fly down for dress shopping next weekend. We'll have the day to catch up. Gotta run. Mwah! Mwah!
From: Renee Greene – April 9, 2014 – 1:13 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: This is the (work) life!
I'm listening to indie bands from LA right now for work. Can you believe it? I'm getting paid to listen to music. I'm heading out to a club this weekend to listen to one perform live…and I can bill my time for it. This is the (work) life, indeed! Counting down the days until you get here.
From: Shelley Manning – April 9, 2014 – 1:42 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: This is the (work) life!
What client is this for? And how can I get in on this action?
From: Renee Greene – April 9, 2014 – 1:50 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: This is the (work) life!
It's a new hotel that will be opening in the hip Los Feliz/Silverlake district. They had hired an agency a year ago but are disappointed with what they are doing so they put out a new bid for the project. I beat out my old agency and a few others (insert pat on the back here) to conduct their grand opening in a few months and they want a cool indie band to headline the event.
It's right before the wedding but hard to turn down the work and opportunity to establish myself as an agency. And since I'm the agency, I need to be involved in selecting the band.
From: Shelley Manning – April 9, 2014 – 1:56 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: This is the (work) life!
That's awesome. Hope those fuckers at the Carr Agency learned not to mess with you. Who are you considering?
From: Renee Greene – April 9, 2014 – 2:01 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: This is the (work) life!
We've narrowed it down to three: Luke's Crossing, The Velvet Biscuits and Blue Cloud Pie. I'm setting up a meeting between the client and each band for a few weeks from now. This is a dream assignment for me. I'm giddy. Giddy!
From: Shelley Manning – April 9, 2014 – 2:03 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: This is the (work) life!
Float me some MP3’s, will ya? I want to take a listen on my flight down.
From: Renee Greene – April 9, 2014 – 2:05 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: This is the (work) life!
Will do. Can't wait to see you and honeymoon photos on Saturday. Please leave the X-rated shots at home.
From: Shelley Manning – April 9, 2014 – 2:08 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: This is the (work) life!
That will severely limit the number of photos you'll have access to. But you'll get the idea from what you see almost as well as from what you don't see. Mwah! Mwah!
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 7:52 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Dress for success
Great fun hanging out with you today to look for bridesmaid dresses and have lunch with Ethan. Sorry I was only able to fly in for the afternoon, but that's the breaks when you take 2 weeks off to traipse across Italy. At least I have the flight to email you and continue gossiping. Speaking of gossip, so that was Billy the Kid, legendary jailbird? Seems harmless. Can't believe he's worth millions.
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:09 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Rethinking Nick?
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:11 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Hardly. It takes a lot more than some cash to impress me.
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:13 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Well, he was quite taken with you during your encounter, albeit brief.
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:14 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Of course he was. Aren't they all?
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:15 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
I'm being serious.
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:15 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
So am I!
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:18 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Stop it. I'm not joking. Ethan said he hasn't stopped talking about you all day. He wanted to know how serious you were with Nick.
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:23 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Nick and I are only married, so yeah, he's got a shot. HA! Well, of course he can't stop thinking about me. Was it my dazzling smile? Humor and wit? Rock hard ass? Do tell!
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:26 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
I didn't get that level of detail but he's been texting Ethan all day and I'm confident it is about you. Should I peek at his phone? He's in the shower right now.
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:27 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Don't look at his phone. Nothing good can come from reading someone else's texts.
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:27 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
But I'm so curious. Aren't you?
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:28 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Renee…
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:28 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
I'm just going to take a harmless little peek...
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:28 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Renee! Do not do this!
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:30 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Well...
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:30 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
You were right. I shouldn't have looked.
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:31 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Okay, now you have to tell me.
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:31 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
I'm so angry right now I can barely type.
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:32 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Take a deep cleansing breath!
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:32 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Did you learn that from yoga?
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:33 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
I did. Nice isn't it?
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:34 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
It is. Thank you. Okay, BTK started off by objectifying you.
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:36 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
I'm used to that. And honestly don't really mind. That can't be what's got you all riled up.
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:39 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Ethan replied, "Yeah she's pretty hot" to which BTK responded, "Pretty hot? You could never get a piece of ass like that!" Granted my ass is a bit bigger and flabbier than yours, but it's not like I'm an ogre or something.
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:42 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
I can see where that would make you very upset. But Sweetie, I don't think BTK is making any kind of comment about your looks. Rather I think he's making a comment about Ethan's.
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:46 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Oh, that's not what's making my blood boil. Ethan wrote back, "I tapped that, dude." I TAPPED THAT, DUDE? I TAPPED THAT DUDE! Now Ethan just walked in with a towel around his waist and gave me a Joey-from-Friends "How you doin?” look. Are you f'ing kidding me?!?
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 8:53 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
I hate to be one of those "I told you so" people - you know, like Ethan, but I told you so. Tsk! Tsk! Nothing good comes from reading other people's messages. In his defense, BTK is an immature womanizer who is clearly compensating for a brain that is bigger than his balls. He doesn't know any better.
Ethan does know better, but he's a guy and guys are competitive. When they get backed into a wall like that, they come out swinging. He's just trying to exert his manhood. If you really want my advice, tell him you are "doin' fine" and let him exert his manhood all over you right now.
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 8:58 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
I can't even look at him right now. He just walked over and kissed my forehead. Now he's drinking a beer. I want to slug him.
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 9:00 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
I am laughing out loud so hard that people on the plane are staring at me.
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 9:01 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
This isn't funny!
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 9:04 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
It is! You have two choices: (1) confess, have a huge fight with him about his behavior, personal boundaries, privacy expectations, etc. or (2) get over it and go let him tap THAT.
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 9:06 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Choice #3 - don't say anything yet secretly seethe and let it fester until one day it comes out in a huge ball of fists and anger.
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 9:07 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
You're right. That is a third choice. My suggestion though is #2.
From: Renee Greene – April 12, 2014 – 9:08 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Argh! You're probably right.
From: Shelley Manning – April 12, 2014 – 9:10 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Dress for success
Go! Go have angry sex. You'll love it. I'll call you in a day or two and we'll figure out next steps with dresses. Mwah! Mwah!