The Click Trilogy (65 page)
Authors: Lisa Becker
Subject: Re: THANK YOU!
Oh c'mon Shelley. I know you think Finlay is "not so bad." And Mark, that's beautiful. I will be stealing, uh, er, I mean borrowing that expression from you (without giving you credit).
From: Shelley Manning – January 9, 2014 – 10:34 AM
To: Renee Greene, Mark Finlay, Ashley Gordon
Subject: Re: THANK YOU!
Quotation marks mean a direct quote, eh grammar queen? That means Mark didn't delete a certain email message, which means someone's gonna be sorry.
From: Renee Greene – January 9, 2014 – 10:35 AM
To: Mark Finlay, Shelley Manning, Ashley Gordon
Subject: Re: THANK YOU!
He knew I needed some cheering up.
From: Mark Finlay – January 9, 2014 – 10:39 AM
To: Renee Greene, Shelley Manning, Ashley Gordon
Subject: Re: THANK YOU!
I deleted the message as instructed. You never said anything about not sharing with anyone first.
From: Ashley Gordon – January 9, 2014 – 10:41 AM
To: Renee Greene, Mark Finlay, Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: THANK YOU!
I'm clearly not in the loop on something and that's not acceptable. Please explain.
From: Shelley Manning – January 9, 2014 – 10:43 AM
To: Renee Greene, Mark Finlay,
Subject: Fwd: Re: THANK YOU!
Don't you dare! This does not need to go any farther.
From: Renee Greene – January 9, 2014 – 10:48 AM
To: Shelley Manning, Mark Finlay, Ashley Gordon
Subject: Re: THANK YOU!
Shelley sent Mark an email and basically told him he's a good guy but asked him to delete the message after reading it. He did, but not before forwarding it to me. She's a softy!
From: Renee Greene – January 9, 2014 – 10:51 AM
To: Shelley Manning, Mark Finlay
Subject: Re: Fwd: Re: THANK YOU!
Oops. Didn't see your message in time. Oh well, it's all out in the open now and we can all move on.
From: Ashley Gordon – January 9, 2014 – 10:54 AM
To: Renee Greene, Mark Finlay, Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: THANK YOU!
I would have done the same. A compliment from Shelley is a rare and special thing. I would have probably printed it out and framed it.
From: Shelley Manning – January 9, 2014 – 10:57 AM
To: Renee Greene, Mark Finlay, Ashley Gordon
Subject: Re: THANK YOU!
Alright. Alright. Not sure how we got off on this tangent, but that's quite enough. How about them Yankees?
From: Renee Greene – January 9, 2014 – 10:59 AM
To: Shelley Manning, Mark Finlay, Ashley Gordon
Subject: Re: THANK YOU!
LOL! You guys always know how to make me smile. XOXO
From: Shelley Manning – January 10, 2014 – 8:45 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Okay?
How you doing today, Sweetie?
From: Renee Greene – January 10, 2014 – 9:33 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Okay?
I'm okay. There are bad days and worse days and today is only a bad one, so I'm thankful for that. I know it will get easier, but I'm not sure I want it to. Doesn't seem right that my pain should lessen. I don't want to stop missing him.
From: Shelley Manning – January 10, 2014 – 9:38 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Okay?
Herb would NEVER want you to forget him or stop missing him. But he would also NEVER want you to be miserable. You are truly his daughter.
From: Renee Greene – January 10, 2014 – 9:51 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Okay?
I know. I remember a few years ago, my accountant, who is also my dad's accountant and golfing buddy, wanted to get a little "aggressive" with my tax return. I told him I just wanted to do the right thing.
He said, "You are your father's daughter." I thought at the time – and I still do – what a compliment! I know he will always live on through me.
But it's just sad to think I won't be able to get his advice about work or just hang out and have a pizza with him. He won't be able to walk me down the aisle or know his grandchildren. Even worse, they won't get to know him. It's just so very...sad. There really isn't any other way to say it. It's just sad.
From: Shelley Manning – January 10, 2014 – 9:55 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Okay?
Okay. Be sad. I give you permission to be really, really sad for a while longer. But then I will be giving you a swift kick in the ass to be less sad. Your agency officially starts on February 1 and he was surely so proud of you and what you accomplished.
From: Renee Greene – January 10, 2014 – 9:56 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Okay?
Thanks, Shel.
From: Shelley Manning – January 10, 2014 – 9:57 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Okay?
Mwah! Mwah! And a big hug with it.
From: Shelley Manning – January 12, 2014 – 11:01 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Reality check
How's she doing? Really?!
From: PBCupLover – January 12, 2014 – 11:04 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Reality Check
She's hanging in there. She has good days and bad days. Scratch that. She has bad days and worse days. But she's managing.
From: Shelley Manning – January 12, 2014 – 11:06 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: Reality Check
That's exactly how she described it. Bad and worse.
From: PBCupLover – January 12, 2014 – 11:11 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Reality Check
It will get easier. But with the wedding coming up, I know it's going to take an emotional toll on her. She's very worried about who's going to walk her down the aisle.
From: Shelley Manning – January 12, 2014 – 11:12 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: Reality Check
I'll do it. I can totally rock a tux.
From: PBCupLover – January 12, 2014 – 11:14 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Reality Check
I'm sure you can. I'll make that suggestion. Certainly will bring a smile to her face.
From: Shelley Manning – January 12, 2014 – 11:16 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: Reality Check
You do that. I'm so relieved to know she has you there. You continue to take care of her or else.
From: PBCupLover – January 12, 2014 – 11:18 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Reality Check
Believe me, I will. Not only do I love her more than anything, I don't want to endure your wrath.
From: Shelley Manning – January 12, 2014 – 11:20 AM
To: PBCupLover
Subject: Re: Reality Check
Smart thinking on both counts. Let me know if you need anything. Talk with you soon.
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 9:33 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: My disgusting man
Ugh! Sorry! Skype just isn't a good idea when Ethan's around. I apologize for his unbelievably rude behavior. In his defense, he didn't know we were talking when he came in and...did that.
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 9:38 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
You mean farted, let out the anal exhale, dropped a booty bomb, broke wind, cut the cheese, exhumed the dinner corpse, gave a heinie hiccup, trouser coughed, and I've run out of ways to paraphrase.
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 9:39 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Yes...that.
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 9:42 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
It was just a fart. Couples do that stuff in front of each other all the time. It's a sign of complete comfort with each other.
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 9:43 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
I've never farted in front of him.
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 9:43 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Never?
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 9:44 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Well once on accident after a particularly cruciferous meal.
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 9:45 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Cruciferous?
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 9:48 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Yeah, you know, broccoli, cauliflower and brussel sprouts or other veggies that are a bit... gassy.
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 9:50 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Honestly, I don't know how he puts up with you.
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 9:51 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
What do you mean? I only let it slip once.
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 9:57 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Sweetie, it's not that. It's that you use words like cruciferous and expect that we all know what it means. And then you use "gassy" but make it sound as if you are whispering it through the side of your mouth out of embarrassment. I might as well be talking to Ashley! We all do it. It's just air.
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 10:00 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Well, that Ashley comment was just uncalled for. ;) You're right. It's just air…but stinky air coming from private places. You do it in front of Nick?
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 10:04 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
First of all, I don't have any private places when it comes to Nick. And second, my "air" doesn't stink. It's like roses and rainbows. Sometimes I even get a standing ovation and I don't mean that sexually.
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 10:06 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Okay. Okay. This conversation has officially gone awry. Can we please change the subject?
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 10:08 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Sure, I can talk about something I DO mean sexually if you would prefer.
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 10:10 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Argh! How about the Middle East Peace Process?
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 10:13 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
I think a big orgy would solve all of the region's troubles. Love the one you're with, right?
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 10:14 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Is there a sexual answer to all of the world's ills?
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 10:15 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
I don't know. Give me a try.
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 10:16 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
School bullying?
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 10:20 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
More sex for nerds! Kids who are getting laid regularly don't mind the occasional shove into the locker. It might actually turn them on. Next?
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 10:22 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Obesity?
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 10:24 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
More cushion for pushin'!
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 10:26 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Ew! That's gross. Okay, try this one...Proliferation of nuclear weapons?
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 10:37 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Nuclear weapons were first used to bring an end to World War II and fear of a nuclear war spread. Young Americans returned home from war and there were almost 2.3 million marriages in 1946, an increase of more than six hundred thousand over the previous year. Many of these newlyweds had children within a year: a record 3.8 million babies were born in 1947. This was the first year of the baby boom, which lasted for most of the 1950s. Between 1948 and 1953 more babies were born than had been over the previous thirty years. Nukes lead to fucks.
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 10:39 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Did you seriously just look that up? Not the last line, but the rest of it?
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 10:40 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
What makes you think that?
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 10:41 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 10:44 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Yes, I did just look that up. But you never said Wikipedia was off limits. What's your next scourge on society that I can solve for you with my special and unique brand of magic?
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 10:46 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
I was going to say homelessness, but I already know you are going to say let's open up our homes and beds to everyone.
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 10:48 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
Indeed, that would have been my response. Glad to see I'm rubbing off on you.
From: Renee Greene – January 16, 2014 – 10:49 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
You are insufferable, you know that?
From: Shelley Manning – January 16, 2014 – 10:52 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: My disgusting man
I do and that is why you love me, miss me and stalk me. Gotta run, but will talk soon. Hang in there, Sweetie. Mwah! Mwah!
From: Shelley Manning – January 22, 2014 – 8:42 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: James Lipton Questionnaire
Hi, Sweetie. You sounded downright chipper yesterday talking about your own agency. I'm so glad you have something positive to focus on aside from how lucky you are to have me as a best friend. Oh, and your wedding to Ethan.
So Nick and I have become obsessed with Inside the Actor's Studio. Even though I hate celebrities, I can't seem to tear myself away from this series. My fav part is the James Lipton questions at the end. So much so, that I've put together my responses for when being as hot and fabulous as I am merits inclusion as a guest on the show.
Want to play along?
From: Renee Greene – January 22, 2014 – 8:48 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: James Lipton Questionnaire
I'm not surprised that Nick likes the show. He's totally star struck. He is constantly asking me about any celebrities I've worked with and when we saw that actress from The Good Wife, he was giddy. The questionnaire sounds fun. Send the questions over.
From: Shelley Manning – January 22, 2014 – 8:56 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: James Lipton Questionnaire
He is pretty star struck. It's actually quite sexy. He likes to pretend that I'm a famous actress and he's a fan. But that's a story for another time. Okay, here are the James Lipton questions...
- What is your favorite word?
- What is your least favorite word?
- What turns you on?
- What turns you off?
- What sound or noise do you love?
- What sound or noise do you hate?
- What is your favorite curse word?
- What profession other than your own would like to attempt?
- What profession would you not like to do?
- If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
From: Renee Greene – January 22, 2014 – 8:59 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: James Lipton Questionnaire
OMG! I am already reeling at the thought of your X-rated answers.
From: Shelley Manning – January 22, 2014 – 9:00 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: James Lipton Questionnaire
Yeah, mine are pretty good.
From: Renee Greene – January 22, 2014 – 9:00 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: James Lipton Questionnaire
Are you going to share?
From: Shelley Manning – January 22, 2014 – 9:01 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: James Lipton Questionnaire
You first.
From: Renee Greene – January 22, 2014 – 9:19 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: James Lipton Questionnaire
Okay. Here goes…
- What is your favorite word? Thank you. Okay, it's two words but one phrase that I feel like no one says anymore. As you know, manners are very important to me.
- What is your least favorite word? It’s a tie between “moist” and “panties” with extra "fingernails-down-the-blackboard-style chills" when the two words are used together.
- What turns you on? Humor. That's probably why I'm head over heels in love with Jon Stewart...oh, and Ethan too. ;)
- What turns you off? Petty squabbles. The world has enough problems without arguing and fretting over inconsequential stuff.
- What sound or noise do you love? My sweet angel, Siobhan, in fits of giggles. And believe me, no one gets her laughing it up like Auntie Renee.
- What sound or noise do you hate? Airplanes taking off. Fatal accidents are more likely to occur during the climbing stage of flight and that sound of the engines revving up just fuh-reaks me out!
- What is your favorite curse word? Mother#@$%er! Enough said!
- What profession other than your own would like to attempt? Professional cake decorator. It looks so fun and yummy.
- What profession would you not like to do? Accountant. As you know, my checkbook rarely balances.
- If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates? I know Jews don't believe in heaven, but we're happy to have you here, the cupcakes are calorie-free and your hair looks great.