The Best of Everything (22 page)

“Daddy, how in the world are you going to sit there criticizing me when you’ve done ten times worse, pretty much your entire adult life? How can you say anything to me at all when I learned everything I know from you? I mean, you did it all. You slept around with I don’t know how many women in the church, you lusted over money, and you stepped on whomever you had to in order to get whatever it was you wanted. And you did this all the way up until maybe two years ago when you finally started reaping so many consequences for all the horrible sins you’d committed that you didn’t have a choice but to change.
Which is fine but it doesn’t erase the very bad example you’ve always set for me since I was in kindergarten.”

When Alicia saw tears forming in his eyes, she regretted how harshly she’d just spoken to him.

“Baby girl, you’re right. You’re right about everything you just said, so, Phillip, I guess you can blame me for a lot of this as well.”

“Maybe. But, Curtis, Alicia is a grown woman and she knows right from wrong.”

“But still, just the same, I’m truly sorry. Baby girl, I’m sorry that I wasn’t a better father to you for so many years, and, Phillip, I’m sorry that you’re also now feeling the backlash of my terrible transgressions.”

“Well, it’s not like any of this matters, one way or the other, because I’m through.”

“Phillip, baby, you don’t mean that,” Alicia said.

“Alicia, I’ve tried to love you in every possible way I could, but it was never enough. I was never a good enough man, I could never provide for you the way you wanted me to…and I give up. I’m hurt, I’m tired, and I just don’t have the energy to go on with you.”

Alicia left her seat, walked around the island, and locked hands with her husband. “Baby, I know this is a difficult time, but I do love you. More than anything. And I still want to spend the rest of my life with you. So please don’t walk out on me. Please don’t throw away our marriage.”

Phillip gazed into her eyes, and a lone tear fell down his cheek. “You know what the saddest part about all of this is? I love you, too. And I have a feeling that I always will. But that’s also the reason I can’t do this anymore. You’ve betrayed me in so many different ways that I’ll never be able to trust you again, and I can’t live like that.”

“But what about our vows? What about for better or worse? What about what God wants? What about forgiveness?”

“Oh, I will eventually forgive you, but that’s where it ends. And then as far as the vows we took, I know divorce is not what God wants, but, Alicia, we haven’t even been married one full year, yet you’ve already slept with another man. And I’m sad to say, I just can’t accept that.”

“But, baby, you know we’ve been having a really rough time, and while I know this doesn’t justify my actions, I felt so unwanted and so confused.”

“Alicia, I felt the same way, but I still knew it was wrong to go out and sleep with someone else. And don’t think I didn’t have the opportunity because I did. I even went as far as having phone conversations with my ex from high school, but when I realized how important my marriage to you was, I ended them.”

“And, baby, our marriage is still important. Even more so now, so let’s just do whatever we have to so we can fix this.”

Phillip eased his hands away from hers. “I’m sorry, but my mind is made up. And Curtis, I wanted to let you know that I’ll be turning in my resignation first thing on Monday.”

“I really wish you wouldn’t.”

“Actually, I doubted that you’d want me to stay on, once Alicia and I are divorced.”

“That’s not true. You’re a wonderful minister and a wonderful man, and my plans for you at the church haven’t changed.”

“I really appreciate that. It means a lot, but I’ve decided that in order for me to move on with my life, it’s best that I move back to the Chicago area and closer to my mother.”

“Maybe you should take a little more time to think about this?”

“No, I really think that leaving is the right thing for me to
do, and I just want to thank you for all the opportunities you’ve given me and for being the best father-in-law.”

“You’re quite welcome.”

Alicia watched Phillip walk out of the kitchen and then cried a new river of tears. Her father tried consoling her, but there was nothing he could say to make her feel better. There was nothing he could do to save her marriage—nothing, because she’d already said and done more than enough and would regret all of it for the rest of her life.

Six Months Later

E
ven after Phillip had told her on the night of her arrest that their marriage was over, Alicia still hadn’t fully believed him. She’d heard him say it with very strong conviction but still, she’d been sure he’d think long and hard about the love they had for each other and would eventually change his mind. But he hadn’t. What he’d done was give his two weeks’ notice just as he’d said he would, and once that period of time had passed, he’d said his good-byes to everyone at the church, told her again how much he loved her, and moved to Chicago. Alicia had wondered which pieces of furniture he might want and had even suggested he take whatever he needed, but he’d told her that all he was going to leave with was his clothing. He’d said that he wanted to start fresh in Chicago and hadn’t wanted to take anything that would remind him of his life in Mitchell because it was much too painful. Alicia had listened to him but then had fallen to her knees, begging him not to leave her. She’d begged him to give her just one more chance, but he’d told her he couldn’t. He’d told her that their marriage had meant every
thing to him, that he’d cherished what he’d considered to be a very sacred bond, but in the end, he’d finally realized that in some cases, love just wasn’t enough. Alicia had then called her mother-in-law, trying to get her to talk to Phillip, too, but she’d told Alicia that although she loved her, she was very disappointed in her and that she wasn’t going to interfere with whatever decision Phillip had decided to make.

So, now, six months later, her divorce from Phillip was already final and she’d never felt more alone in her life. She’d moved in with her father, Charlotte, and Matthew, but on most days, all she did was write. It was amazing how Phillip’s leaving her had been the one thing that had ultimately inspired her to sit at her computer every single day. Her writing had even proved to be therapeutic, and this was probably the reason she was now composing a story that was loosely based on her marriage.

Of course, her father was thrilled that she was working so diligently on her manuscript and so were her mother and Charlotte, and they all believed she was definitely going to be published. She knew there were no guarantees that she would be, but like them, she did hope and believe that it would eventually happen.

Not to mention, she needed to start earning a living. She’d thought about going back to the church, that is, if they would have her, but strangely enough, her father had told her that if she took her writing seriously, he would give her a thousand-dollar monthly allowance for one full year but after that, she’d be on her own as far as money was concerned and that she would have to find employment. Alicia had known that his offer was more than fair, and she wasn’t planning to let him down. She also couldn’t thank her father enough for paying off the twenty thousand dollars she’d accumulated in Phillip’s name because it wasn’t like any of that had been his responsibility. But he’d done
it because he truly loved and respected Phillip and he hadn’t thought Phillip should have to pay for something he hadn’t even known about. However, when it came to her balances with Neiman’s, Saks, Macy’s, and each of her other accounts, he’d caught them up to date but had made it clear that
she
was going to make the monthly payments from the money he was giving her every month.

Alicia hadn’t liked this part of the deal at all because this had meant she wouldn’t have much money left to shop with, but it wasn’t as if she’d been in any position to debate with her father about anything. Actually, she had tried arguing her case, but for the first time in her life, he’d told her to take it or leave it. He’d told her that it was either his way or no way at all and that he would be fine with whatever option she went with. Needless to say, Alicia had relented and had agreed to do what she was told.

Thankfully, though, Charlotte did take her shopping every now and then, so she was glad about that. It wasn’t the same as if she had her own income and could buy whatever she wanted when she wanted, but it was definitely better than nothing. Alicia knew everyone thought she had a problem—but she didn’t—and was sure that once she got back on her feet, was earning a very good salary, and was living on her own again, she’d be fine. She’d pay her bills on time, add a little money to a savings account, and shop a lot more sensibly. She couldn’t say that she would no longer buy the top brands of clothing and shoes she’d always purchased in the past, because if she did she’d be lying, but she would certainly spend her money in a much more controlled manner.

Alicia rolled the mouse across the rubber pad and signed on to AOL, but then she thought about Levi. At her attorney’s suggestion, she hadn’t had any contact with him since the day the
two of them had been arrested, but she knew he was still downtown awaiting his trial and that it was taking place three months from now. She still couldn’t believe she’d gotten involved with someone like him, but she would never forget how caring he’d been toward her. Of course, none of his compassionate ways were going to make a bit of difference once he was inside the courtroom, but she still thought about the good way he had always treated her.

Sadly, though, just like her father had thought, the local media had covered the story, and it hadn’t been long before the national media had publicized it as well. It had seemed that none of them could wait to spread breaking news about the daughter of the world-renowned Reverend Curtis Black and how she’d gotten caught having an affair with a “drug kingpin,” as some had called Levi. They’d talked about her being arrested and most importantly, how this was yet another scandalous saga for the “good reverend” and his family. The one consolation, however, was that they hadn’t covered it for more than a couple of days, and now it was basically never mentioned at all, not even at church. There had been a few heads turning and a number of people whispering whenever Alicia had entered the sanctuary for service, but even that had died down after the first month or so.

Still, she knew that once the trial began, the media would start scrambling in a frenzy all over again because the evidence that the prosecution would be presenting would prove, without a doubt, that Levi was the head of a huge drug empire. Alicia had always wondered how he’d gotten busted and how much money he’d actually made over the years but now she knew, thanks to Brad and the information one of his sources had given him. Brad still wasn’t speaking to Alicia, but he’d told a lot to Melanie and Melanie had relayed all that she’d learned. Mela
nie had told her that she could never mention any of what she was telling her, not to another living soul, but that she thought Alicia should know as much as possible before she took the witness stand.

Alicia still wasn’t looking forward to giving open testimony and had no idea what she could possibly contribute, now that they had everything they needed to send Levi away for a very long time. Because as it had turned out, one of the narcotics officers whom Levi had been paying off for a number of years had been found out by some of his peers, and they’d told him that his only chance at any leniency was if he named names from the top down. Which he had. He’d named four other detectives in the division, the higher-up dealers who sold directly to hundreds of other dealers at all levels throughout the entire states of Illinois, Indiana, and Ohio, and most of all, he’d given up the manufacturing and processing location, which was in a farm community outside of Indiana. On top of that, the prosecuting attorney had offered a deal to Levi’s attorney—the one Levi had told her he trusted completely—and he’d given up the locations and documentation for each of Levi’s local accounts, none of which were in Levi’s name, as well as the accounts his attorney had set up offshore—accounts that totaled more than ten million dollars.

So, without question, Levi was finished, and Alicia was glad she hadn’t gotten more involved with him than she had because the outcome for her could have been a lot different. Right now, she could be sitting in jail, awaiting trial and eventually preparing to serve a prison sentence. But through God’s favor, she was okay. She was actually a lot better than okay, because even though she had disgraced herself and her family and lost the love of her life, she was safe. God had protected her, even though she’d made a mountain of foolish mistakes, and He had allowed
her the chance at turning her life around and doing the right thing. He’d stood by her and loved her unconditionally and remained true to His Word, the same as her father had always preached about in his sermons, and Alicia couldn’t be more grateful.

She’d learned some very valuable lessons, and unlike her father, she wouldn’t sin, ask for forgiveness over and over, and then go back to committing the same sins again. She wouldn’t live her life that way and then, like her father, end up sorry for it. No, what Alicia would do is walk the straight and narrow and choose a much wealthier husband this next time around. She would marry extremely well and would finally be able to do what she’d originally set out to do with Phillip—live happily ever after with the man of her dreams.

She’d finally be happy, and she couldn’t wait to meet him.

To God—for everything.

To my loving husband, the rest of my wonderful family members, my devoted friends, my amazing assistant, my incredible agent, my fabulous readers, and everyone at HarperCollins/William Morrow/Avon (my remarkable publisher) for all your love and support. I would never have been able to accomplish any of this without you, and I am forever grateful.

Much love and God bless you always,

Kimberla Lawson Roby