Smashed (10 page)

I rounded a bend and felt her like a punch in the gut. The wild essence of wolf paired with the sensual core of vampire to make a potent force that was all Alexa. Nobody else walking this earth felt like that; I was sure of it.

I moved faster, knowing she would feel me too, hoping it wouldn’t drive her away. When I stepped through a small thatch of trees and saw her there, I stopped dead in my tracks.

We stared at one another, me in wonder and her in shock. The first thing I noticed was her brown eyes. Relief swept me at the familiar sight. Those deep, all encompassing orbs flashed with emotion.

“Arys.” My name was a whisper on her lips. The smooth alabaster of her skin made her eyes appear that much darker. I almost came undone at the sight of the vampire fangs poking out from beneath her top lip.

She threw herself into my arms, and I clutched her tight. Power sparked and zapped around us. I buried my face in her soft hair and tried not to weep my relief.

Jez walked away, joining Sinclair where he hovered several yards away. She tugged on his hand until he followed her, allowing us to be alone.

“You make me fucking crazy, you know that?” I said, kissing her like it had been years rather than days.

Her lips were soft, but her kiss was commanding. Her feelings were on overdrive due to her recent transition, and it showed. The heat of anger mingled with the depths of sorrow and the fires of passion to make her kiss violent with emotion.

In a move that came as no great surprise, she broke off the kiss and slapped me across the face. It snapped my head to the side. I was impressed with both her new, undead strength and the force driving it.

“That’s for killing me,” she said, following up with another. “And that’s for enjoying it so damn much.”

I was afraid to blink, afraid even to move. I didn’t want to give her a chance to bolt, not until she’d heard me out.

“I suppose that’s fair. But you know I had to do it. Hell, you demanded it.” I wasn’t protesting her wrath; I certainly deserved far worse than a few slaps.

“I know that,” she snapped. Then her face fell, and her lip trembled. “But did you have to enjoy it so fucking much? I felt the way you loved it. You got off on it.”

There was no sense denying allegations that were true. I reached for her, and she let me pull her back into my embrace. With her head on my chest, I stroked a hand through her hair. “I’ve been worried sick about you, Alexa. Being apart is hurting you more than it’s helping.”

“Is that why you came? To stop me from acting like a vampire? That’s a bit hypocritical coming from you, Arys.” Despite her accusatory words, her tone held a note of sadness.

The way she felt in my arms was so right. I couldn’t bear the thought of letting go. Not now, after all this. “No, of course not. I came to stop you from doing things now that you will regret for several lifetimes over.”

She peered up at me with blood tears brimming in her eyes. “It’s too late for that.”

I couldn’t help the dark glare that twisted my expression into something ugly. I stared in the direction Jez had pulled Sinclair and vibrated with the exertion it took not to go after him.

“No,” Alexa said, her voice hard and brittle. “None of this is his fault. He kept it from being worse than it was those first few nights.”

I took her face in my hands and searched her for the flicker of myself that so often lurked behind her eyes. “You don’t belong with him, my love. And as much as you think you need him, you know it’s true.”

She pulled my hand from her cheek and pressed her lips against my fingertips. “I don’t know who I am anymore, Arys. You are so entangled in every part of me. It’s like there is no distinction between us anymore. I do belong with you. I know it. But I need to still be me. I’m trying to do that.”

“And that’s why you’re losing your mind, my beautiful wolf.” She thought I didn’t understand, but she still didn’t realize that where she was now, I had already been. “I know what you’re going through. And I know that if we’re not careful, we’re going to end up like Lilah and Salem and who knows how many others.”

“I know. You’re right.” She nodded vigorously, drawing me to twist a lock of blonde hair around my finger. “I just need some time.”

“You don’t have a lot of time to find yourself right now. The FPA is all over you. They’re launching a hunt for you. Tonight.” From her hair to the curve of her waist and then the elegant expanse of her slender neck, I couldn’t stop touching her. “Briggs is issuing a capture order. There will be agents scouring the city for you, Alexa.”

This didn’t appear to be news to her. She nodded, as if it had been expected. “Because of Sylvia. Figures. That bitch had it coming.”

“I don’t care about that. All I want is for you to get some control over yourself and to stay out of the FPA lockup. Briggs is up to something. Something bad. You don’t want to go inside that building as a vampire. Trust me.”

She nodded, and I could almost hear her thinking that it was just like me to always be right about shit like this. There was a strong, ethereal quality to her energy, as if she now hummed at a much higher frequency. It still felt like Alexa but more vast and complex.

I was still just as drawn to her as I’d ever been, quite possibly more so. She had feared that would change. Though she hadn’t said so, I knew. I felt it. I also knew that I would always want her.

“I’ll handle the FPA,” she said. “I always do.”

“No, you always did. But now you’re public enemy number one. Briggs isn’t going to take it easy on you this time.” I pulled her close for a kiss, tender this time. Soft and delicate. “Please, come home with me.”

She pulled away, a hand going to her face to swipe away a few stray tears. “I can’t. Not yet.”

“Alexa, please. The longer you drag this out, the worse it gets for both of us. You know that.”

“Yes, I do know that!” Her sudden shout echoed around us. “But forcing me to do something before I’m ready isn’t going to help.”

Alexa’s outburst brought Kale back with an angry outburst of his own. He jerked away from Jez who sought to hold onto his arm and came at me.

Sinclair shoved me away from her, backing me up against the closest headstone. Venom dripped from every word he snarled into my face. “Back the fuck off, Arys. Nobody is forcing Alexa to do anything against her will.”

“Oh, is that so?” A vicious, grim smile crossed my face. “Try telling that to the FPA. Remember your time in lockup well, my friend? Because that’s what Briggs has planned for Alexa. He’s coming for her. Think you’ve got what it takes to keep her safe?”

“I don’t need anyone to keep me safe, you damn Neanderthals,” Alexa interjected. She buzzed with a frustration I could feel both inside and out. “I’m not afraid of Briggs.”

“Briggs isn’t what I’m worried about,” I snapped, shoving Sinclair out of my face. “It’s what’s going to happen to you when that place gets inside your head. You can’t even keep your shit together now.” To Kale, I added, “No thanks to you.”

Sinclair was seething. Alexa tried to pull him away from me, but he shook her off. “You have no fucking idea what it’s been like. Keep your accusations to yourself. I’m the one cleaning up your mess.”

“Is that how you see her?” I challenged, finding his aggressiveness very enticing. “As my mess? Well, I’m not the one teaching her how to be a cold-blooded killer, am I?”

“No, you just made her one.”

“Guys, come on. You’re acting like jackasses.” This from Jez who watched us all as if she couldn’t decide which vampire was most volatile.

Ignoring her, I held up both hands to show Kale I didn’t want any trouble. I knew that if I put my hands on him, I wouldn’t stop until he was dust.

“When you take her to bed, it’s me that she thinks of,” I said, low and deadly. “But you already know that, don’t you?”

Alexa gasped my name. Jez muttered an obscenity.

Kale glared with the sheer hatred of one who knew the truth. Rubbing it in his face had been low but ultimately necessary.

“I am always there because I am part of her,” I continued. “You will never change that. Maybe it’s time for you to move on, Sinclair. This city has run its course for you, don’t you think?”

“Is that a threat?”

It wasn’t. Not really. “More like a suggestion.”

Sinclair backed off a few paces, but he was still fuming. I didn’t blame him. I would hate me too if I were in his place. Falling in love with Alexa was easy. She had a strong side that I admired, a soft side that I adored, and a personality that would give even the most patient man a challenge. She was an enigma, fascinating in every way. Loving Alexa was easy. Losing her would be devastating.

“Well, I didn’t ask for your opinion,” he said, doing a good job of keeping his emotions off his face.

We stood there staring at one another. The atmosphere grew thick with the violent intentions we both harbored. Alexa looked back and forth between us and broke down. With a frustrated cry, she fled, leaving us looking after her.

“The FPA is hunting her,” I said, calm despite the roiling mass of animosity overflowing inside of me. “If you really love her as much as you claim to, do what’s best for her. Walk away. There’s an open invitation for you at The Wicked Kiss Las Vegas. You wanted to escape her anyway, didn’t you? All you have to do is be the one to make the break.”

“It doesn’t fucking work that way, and you know it.” Sinclair cast a helpless glance at Jez whose expression revealed nothing of her thoughts or opinions.

“Perhaps some time apart would give you a new perspective on things. Las Vegas is the perfect city for a guy like you. It’s high strung, restless, and a little mad. I think you’d enjoy it.” Winning the poker game against Jenner had been a small victory. However, if I could convince Sinclair to actually go, it would be huge.

Sinclair was no idiot, which was one thing I respected about him. His jaw dropped, and he eyed me in disgust. “You must be really proud of yourself for concocting such a scheme. She’s going to hate you for this.”

“Only if you leave. And that, I can handle.” I crossed my arms and shrugged. “Besides, it only makes sense that Alexa’s second should join my second in my city. Jenner could use the backup, and you could use the escape. Don’t tell me it doesn’t appeal to you just a little.”

His gaze dropped to the ground, and he stared in silence for a moment before saying, “Let me guess. You’ve already discussed this with Jenner.” When I didn’t deny it, he continued. “I knew you were a selfish prick, but I didn’t know you were such a low life piece of shit.”

That one took some restraint. There was only so much crap I could take from him before I snapped. Knowing that’s what he wanted, I somehow resisted. “If you want to protect her from the things that will only feed her darkness, then consider that the best way to do that is to start with you.” Rage called forth the power. The effort it took to hold it back burned like the sting of a poisonous beast intent on escape.

Before Kale could respond or react, Jez stepped between us. “I think this little meeting is over.” With a hand on his arm, she gave him a solemn look. “Kale, go now, please. Find Alexa before the FPA does.” To me she said with a glower, “Move it. Now. Unless you want to walk back to your car.”

Stiff and silent, Kale exuded a menacing calm. I thought for certain he was going to lose it and take a swing at me. Instead, he gave Jez’s ponytail a friendly tug and turned to go.

When I didn’t budge from where I stood, Jez gave me a shove. Fearless and furious, she herded me back the way we’d come.

“That was really low,” she said when we’d almost reached her Jeep. “I get why you did it. I see the logic there, but that was a shitty way to deal with things.”

“I know.” I nodded, entirely in agreement with her. “What choice did I have though? If you were in my position, what would you do?”

She glanced back into the quiet cemetery. “I don’t know. But that kind of controlling behavior is what drove Lilah and Salem to where they are now. Is that what you want to happen with you and Alexa?”

“Of course not. Don’t you think this is all making me crazy too?” I was already plagued with guilt, an emotion I did not deal with well. “I made him an offer, a suggestion really. That’s all. It’s all on him now.”

Once inside the darkened confines of the Jeep, Jez turned to me with a strange, sad look on her heart-shaped face. “You’d better be careful, Arys. Or you’re going to lose her.”

Less than an hour later, I was back at The Spirit Room parking lot, awaiting the arrival of Shaz and Jenner. My gaze flicked over Jez who stood chain smoking beside me, leaning against the Jeep.

“Are you sure you want to be part of this?” I asked.

“Fucking right,” she quipped. “No damn humans are going to hunt my best friend and get away with it.”

On a whim, I’d decided that if Agent Briggs wanted a vampire hunt, I would give him one. Including Jenner just went without saying. I’d considered leaving Shaz out of it but knew him well enough to know that I’d never hear the end of it if I did.

My plan wasn’t entirely thought out just yet. I was playing it by ear for the most part. I figured a nice distraction would be enough to pull Briggs off Alexa’s trail. If he thought he’d seen a public display of vampire killing, well, he hadn’t seen jack shit yet.

“Good,” I said, frowning as she reached for another cigarette. “Shifter or not, those things can’t be safe.”

“Spare me the warning, Dr. Oz. Unless you’re my mother, I don’t want to hear it. Actually, scratch that. I don’t want to hear it from her either.” Jez fired up another smoke, taking a long, slow drag. “I’m going to quit. Again. I just need something to help get me through this slump.”

She was certainly stronger than I was. The things I did for a rush had gone much deeper than a mere addiction. There wasn’t a damn thing that would make me give them up.

The black Jaguar that Alexa had inherited pulled into the parking lot with much more aggression than required. If Alexa knew I’d taken it, she’d probably kick my ass to the moon. It was all she had left of the man who had turned her, a piece of crap of a wolf who had seduced her in her teens. Killing him had always been on my agenda. Waiting until she and I had established our twin flame bond had robbed me of the chance. Oh well, he was dead now, and if there were any justice in this world, he was burning in hell.