See You at the Show (46 page)

It had been a blip, totally out-of-character for a man like Daniel, but they were getting back on track now.
 
She could feel it.
 
Everything was going according to plan.
 
Except the fact that Daniel found it hard to even look at her at the moment.
 
Conversation’s were strained and in reality they hadn’t even spent that much time together since her return but it would all fall into place.
 
Eventually.
 
That perfect happy ending would happen.
 
Daniel would soon get back to normal and stop pining over someone that he just couldn’t have, because Samantha wasn’t stupid.
 
She knew what was going on in his head, she could see it in his eyes but that would pass.
 
She just needed to give him a little more time then he’d soon start to realise that Stevie never had been right for him, that she could never have replaced what he had with her and when that time came he’d ask her to marry him again, she knew he would.
 
They’d have the ceremony at her parents’ home and it would be a magnificent affair, something that would show everyone they were back together and more solid than ever.
 
Then she could finally start to be the best Prime Minister’s wife
Downing Street
had ever seen.
 

Yes, it would all happen and it would all be perfect, the way their life had used to be.
 
The way it would be again.
 
Of that Samantha Madison had no doubt.

***

 
Stevie loved
Los Angeles
.
 
She’d spent a lot of time there over the years with the band and being back here now, back where she belonged in a world that accepted her without any conditions, it felt good.
 
She felt free again.
 
She could be herself, and she’d needed that.
 
To be able to handle everything that had happened she’d had to be herself.

They had one night left here in L.A., the final gig of the whole tour, then she and Mark were going to spend some time together in the U.S., as a couple, because that’s what they were now.
 
A couple.
 
For the first time in years, after all that time of pretending it was something neither of them wanted when it was quite evident it was what they’d both wanted more than anything, they’d just been too stubborn to admit it, they were finally together, properly together.
 
Boyfriend and girlfriend.
 
Mark Cassidy and Stevie Stone.
 
Rocks coolest couple.

As Connor had predicted, the media storm had taken a while to run it’s course, and Stevie hadn’t helped with the attempted overdose, but with a lot of help and with people to guide her, she’d got through it all.
 
Eventually.
 
Rather than hiding away she’d taken the advice to speak out and give people what they wanted – her side of things – and it had been almost cathartic to get everything out in the open.
 
It had been like the most public counselling session you could ever have had but it had helped more than she’d ever thought possible.
 

She’d given exclusives to one newspaper and one TV show but after that she’d been in so much demand it was ridiculous.
 
Everyone wanted a piece of her and she’d found herself having modelling contracts, record deals and TV work thrown at her from every direction.
 
Within a fortnight she had an agent who was handling everything for her, helping her decide just what to do next, but she wanted to do the tour with the band before she decided anything about her future.
 
She wanted a bit of time with Mark, time to get her head straight.
 
Time to meet her son before any new crazy rollercoaster ride began because there was still so much to get her head around.
 
Including the change in Mark – the man she’d once accused of running away from things – because he had been amazing throughout it all.
 

He was a totally different Mark Cassidy to the one she’d known before.
 
It was as if he’d suddenly grown up and realised that it wasn’t a weakness to show emotion or commitment.
 
He loved her, and she’d finally let herself love him back.
 
Oh, he was still very much the rock star out there on stage, still the man most girls would kill to get near, he hadn’t changed
that
much.
 
But he’d changed enough to show Stevie that he could be there for her when she needed him.
 
And she’d changed enough to let him.

So she’d gone back to what she knew best, roadie-ing for the band on the American leg of their tour, and she’d loved every second of being back out on the road.
 
It wasn’t exactly the same of course, how could it be with everything that had happened?
 
She had a son out there - a son she was going to meet very soon; she was practically a celebrity herself – albeit a slightly reluctant one at the minute - thanks to recent events, with a whole new chapter in her life about to begin.
 
But being on the road with a rock band was still where her heart lay.
 
Tour buses, concert venues, different hotel rooms - it was home.
 
It was the way she liked things.
 
That uncertain predictability.

“Jesus, Jack, what have you been smoking?” Stevie asked, as Jack Warner sauntered onto the stage for the sound check, chewing gum and oozing rock star swagger with his dirty blonde hair and torn jeans.

“Are you telling me the gum isn’t masking it then?”

“Not much, no.”

He shrugged, picking up his guitar and slinging it over his shoulder as he walked over to her, slipping his arm round her waist and kissing her quickly on the cheek.
 
      

She looked at him.
 
“What was that for?”

“It’s good to have you back, that’s all.”

She couldn’t help smiling.
 
“Missed me have you?”

“Yeah,” he smiled back.
 
“I’ve had no-one to fight with.”

She felt her stomach do a little flip.
 
She really was home and it was the best feeling.
 

“Is he bothering you?” Mark smiled, walking onto the stage, hands dug deep in his pockets and Stevie felt her stomach flip over again – for a whole different reason.
 
Why had she never realised before just what this man meant to her instead of fighting it every step of the way?

“No, funnily enough he isn’t.
 
Not at the minute, anyway.”

Jack stuck his tongue out at her and she returned the gesture before slipping her arms round Mark’s waist.

“How you feeling?” he asked, pulling her closer.

She rested her forehead against his, gently stroking the back of his neck.
 
“I’m ok.
 
A little nervous maybe, but I’m sure he’s feeling exactly the same.”

Connor had flown over to
L.A.
from the
U.K.
with Luke a couple of days ago, and now she was just minutes away from meeting her son for the first time in fifteen years.
 
The last time she’d seen him he’d been a beautiful two year old toddler and now he was almost eighteen years old.
 
So much time had passed and she’d lost so many precious years and it was all her fault, but she just hoped that he would understand why she’d done what she’d felt she’d had to do and let her start to rebuild that lost relationship between them.
 
It had become very important to her, to make this work.
 
She wanted to make it up to him.
 
She wanted to love her son.

She knew he was a fan of the band, Connor had told her as much, and when he’d told her that Luke hadn’t managed to get tickets for their
U.K.
dates she’d suggested he bring him over to
L.A.
for the last gig of the tour.
 
Make it something special.
 
And if she was honest with herself she felt much safer and more confident about coming face-to-face with her son again in surroundings she felt comfortable in.
 

According to Connor, Luke had gone wild at the chance to fly to
Los Angeles
, a place he’d always wanted to visit, and he was even more excited about meeting the band.
 
How he felt about meeting her she still didn’t know but she’d find out soon enough because they were on their way to the venue, and this was finally it.
 
She was going to meet the son she’d abandoned – because there was no other word for it – all those years ago.
 

“He’s gonna love you,” Mark smiled, kissing the tip of her nose, and she smiled back.
 

“Well, maybe not straightaway.
 
He’s had a lot to deal with and me just gate-crashing his life like this, it can’t be easy.”
 
She looked up into Mark’s deep brown eyes.
 
Eyes she could get lost in and she would, later.
 
“But, I’d like to think that we can get to know each other, at his own pace.
 
I don’t want to rush him into anything; I don’t want to do that.
 
But I really hope he’s up for that, Mark.
 
I just want him to know that I’m sorry.
 
And I want
you
to know that I’m sorry too, for keeping this from you.
 
More than anyone I should have told
you
.”

“Hey, come on.”
 
He gently stroked her fringe from her eyes, taking her hand in his and squeezing it tight.
 
“We’ve been over all of this a hundred times.
 
It’s ok, you know it is.
 
I just want you to be happy – I want
us
to be happy, and all of this, everything that’s happened…it’s made quite a few of us put a lot of things into perspective.
 
So no more apologies, ok?
 
Let’s move forward and get this future of ours started because we’re gonna have a great life, baby.
 
I promise you that.”

She smiled, kissing him gently, burying her fingers in the hair at the back of his neck as the kiss got harder, his hand sliding further up her t-shirt.
 
They had a future, Stevie Stone and Mark Cassidy, and that thought alone made everything else that much easier to deal with.

***

Luke was beside himself with a mixture of excitement at meeting one of the most famous bands on the rock scene, and stomach-churning nerves at the thought of seeing his mum after all these years.
 
His head was a bit all over place because she was one of the coolest, most beautiful women out there and the fact she was his mum was so great, but then, when he thought about all the years he’d been without her, how she’d been able to walk away with not one word to either him or his dad, well, that confused him.
 
He wanted it to be ok, he really did.
 
He just wasn’t sure what he should really be feeling.
 
He’d had three months to get used to the idea but he still didn’t know what should be going on in his head.

“You ok?” Connor asked, sitting down on the edge of the bed in his son’s hotel room, watching as he rubbed wax into his hands and pushed them through his dark hair, spiking it up.

Luke nodded, picking up his cuff watch from the table and fastening it onto his left wrist.
 
The same wrist Stevie wore hers on, Connor noticed.

“You sure?” Connor went on.

Luke turned around and shoved his hands in his pockets, leaning back against the table beside him.

“It’s ok to still be confused, Luke.
 
Really, it is.
 
You’ve had a lot to take in, so many things going on, and nobody expects you to get used to all of this overnight.
 
So if you’re still unsure about meeting Stevie…”

“No.
 
I want to meet her, dad.
 
I want to get to know her.”
 
He looked at his dad, his blue eyes so like his mum’s as he looked straight at Connor.
 
“I should hate her really, shouldn’t I?
 
For what she’s done.
 
For not being there for me when I was growing up, but I don’t.
 
I don’t hate her.
 
Is that wrong?”

Connor shook his head.
 
Luke had handled this far better than he’d ever expected, and he’d had some shit thrown at him over the past few months.
 
Hearing his mum was back in his life then knowing she’d tried to take an overdose, that would surely be enough for any teenager to cope with.
 
But Luke had also had to contend with reporters and photographers following him to and from college, hanging around outside their home – even Connor’s journalism connections hadn’t helped stop all that from happening, if anything they’d made things slightly worse.
 
But Luke had handled everything with the sense and intelligence of someone far older than his seventeen years and Connor couldn’t be more proud of him.