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I watched as Heather walked up to the guy she
had been dancing with for the last thirty minutes. She reached out
her hand, and then they both started to walk toward the dance
floor. She led him right next to Josh and Lynda.

Britney Spear’s “Womanizer” started to play,
and I knew that this wasn’t going to end well. I looked at Ellie,
who was just staring at Heather with her mouth hanging open. I
glanced back out to the dance floor to see Heather and this guy all
over each other. I was about to tell Ellie to go get Heather.

Then, she said, “Oh, holy fuck.”

I looked back and Heather and the guy were
kissing, and his hands were all over her. Then, he moved his hands
her shirt. I looked over at Josh and saw the look in his eyes. I
jumped up and started to walk out toward them when Ellie grabbed my
arm.

“Gunner, wait. Stop. Don’t get involved,
please.”

Just then, I saw Josh
grabbed this guy from behind and spun him around.
Motherfucker.
He’s going
to punch him.

Sure enough, Josh swung and knocked the shit
out of the guy. I pushed Ellie’s hand off of my arm and ran over to
Josh. I grabbed him before he went after the guy again.

“What the fuck is your problem, you asshole?”
The guy shouted at Josh.

“That’s my girl you’re kissing, you
motherfucker.”

Heather had her hand over her mouth in shock.
Josh was trying to get out of my grip, but he was so drunk he could
hardly stand up. When Josh yelled out that she was his girl,
Heather started to laugh.

She walked up to Josh, and he instantly
stopped struggling against me.

“My girl?
Are you kidding me? You practically fuck
her
on the dance floor
all night long, and then you have the nerve to hit a guy for
kissing me! You really are a jerk, do you know that?” Heather said
as she poked her finger over and over again in Josh’s
chest.

“He had his hand up your shirt, Heather.
You’re not that kind of girl,” Josh said as he tried to pull out of
my grip.

“Josh, if I let you go, will you settle
down?” I let up some on my hold.

“Fine, Gunner, just let my ass go. If this is
what she wants, then so be it.” Josh started to walk away.

“Fuck you, Josh!” Heather shouted.

He slowly turned around and smiled at
her.

“You already had your chance. It’s someone
else’s turn now.”

Ah shit.
Ellie walked between Josh and Heather just as
Heather was about to go after Josh.

“Heather, stop this right now and let’s just
go. Lynda, are you riding with Gunner or me?”

“She’s going with Gunner. I’m sure her and
Josh haven’t finished what they started.”

Heather pushed past Ellie and Lynda and then
followed Josh out of the bar.

Jesus, what a crazy-ass group of friends I
have.

I took Ellie by the arm and led her out of
the bar. When we got to the side of the building, I pushed her up
against the wall and kissed her. Her hands immediately went up to
my head, as she pulled at my hair. She let out a moan that traveled
throughout my whole body.

I pulled slightly away from her and
smiled.

“Wow. What the heck was that for?” Ellie
asked, pushing her body into me.

My dick instantly got hard, and I wanted
nothing more than to get her home.

“For marrying me and loving me,” I said,
pushing a piece of hair behind her ear.

She smiled up at me. Leaning in, she was
about to kiss me when we heard Josh and Heather going at it
again.

“Holy shit, it’s like Ari and Jeff all over
again!” I said.

I took Ellie’s hand and led her to the
parking lot as she let out a laughed.

CHAPTER
THIRTY-SIX

JEFF

Ari had finally cried herself to sleep thirty
minutes ago. I just sat there and watched her sleep as I thought
about how I’d walked away from her earlier.

Fuck. If only she had just told me once she’d
found out about the baby, I would have handled things so
differently.

I put my head down in my hands and felt the
tears coming again. This was entirely my fault. Just like Ellie had
said, I’d left them both to run to some nutcase whose only goal was
to tear me away from the only person I’d ever love.

Our baby is gone.
I never even got to place my hand on her stomach
to talk to the baby. I never had one second to just enjoy the idea
of being a parent with Ari.

God, I can’t imagine how
scared she must have been this last week.
I
knew something was different about her. I haven’t even gotten a
chance to just hold her. I just wanted to comfort her.

I stood up and pulled out my cell phone. It
was about to die, there was no way I was going to my truck to get
the charger. With my luck, Ari would wake up and find me gone.

The nurse had come in earlier and said that
Ari would be able to leave tomorrow morning. I walked over to the
side of her bed. She’d managed to roll over on her side even though
I knew she was in pain from her ribs. I had to smile when she kept
cussing out the doctor, insisting her ribs had to be broken because
she was in so much pain.

I love this girl so damn much.

I needed to hold her. I crawled onto the bed
and tried to very gently lie down next to her. I didn’t want to
touch her for fear of waking her up or, worse yet, hurting her.

“It’s about fucking time you got in bed with
me.”

I smiled and then let out a
laugh.
There’s my girl.

“I want to hold you, Ari, but I’m afraid I’ll
hurt you, baby.”

“Please, Jeff. Please just hold me. I need to
feel you.”

That was all I needed. Moving closer to her,
I gently put my arm around her. I felt her relax instantly.

I was just about to fall asleep when she
started to talk to me.

“I’m so scared, Jeff.”

“Why are you scared, baby?”

“What if I can’t have kids?”

“What? Ari, why would you even think that?
Women have miscarriages and then have other kids all the time.”

“Do you think I’ll be a good mother? I mean,
like my mom? If we do have a child with Fragile X, can I.”

I leaned over and kissed the back of her
head. I wanted nothing more than to just take her away from all of
this. If only I could turn the hands of the clock back to this
morning, I would have never walked away from her.

“Ari, I have no doubt in my mind, baby, that
you’re going to be a wonderful mother. I see you with Matt. I see
the love and patience you have with him. I’m in awe when I watch
you. I love you, Ari, and I’m so sorry I did this to you.”

She didn’t say anything for a few minutes,
and I could tell she was crying.

Then, for the hundredth time tonight, the
guilt hit me like a brick wall. All I wanted to do was call Rebecca
and tell her how much I hated her. What good would that do
though?

“Jeff?”

I cleared my throat and attempted to
talk.

“Yeah, baby?”

“I really started to love the idea of having
our baby. I feel like I took that away from you. Just because we
lost her doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t have been able to feel the
same joy I felt. But now…now, I just feel like a huge part of me is
missing, like I just lost the most precious gift ever, and I never
even gave you the chance to feel it also. What type of person does
that make me?”

My heart was hurting so bad in my chest that
I couldn’t breathe. I had to get up. I started to sit up carefully,
so I didn’t move the bed too much. I didn’t want to hurt Ari.

Ari slowly turned, trying to sit herself
up.

I felt like I was going to be sick. I knew
there was something wrong the moment I had Rebecca’s baby in my
arms. Instead of being happy, I’d felt sad, like I had just lost
something. I knew in that moment, the baby wasn’t mine, but what I
didn’t know was that I was truly losing my own child.

“Ari, what time did you fall off of the
horse?”

“What difference does it make?”

“I just want to know.”

“I don’t know. It was probably an hour, maybe
an hour and a half after you left. Why?”

I leaned over and started taking deep
breaths. This was my fault. If I hadn’t left her, she would have
never gone riding. She would’ve told me about the baby, and we
would be home right now, making love...celebrating...and hoping
Garrett didn’t walk in on us.

I had taken that gift from
her. I tried with all my might not to do, it but I started to cry.
I fell to my knees and just lost it.
I
took our child away from her.

The next thing I knew, Ari was on the floor
next to me, holding me while I just cried.

“I’m so sorry, Ari. I’m so very sorry I left
y’all. Oh god…please forgive me.”

“It wasn’t your fault, Jeff. I’m to blame,
and so is Rebecca. If she’d never tried to deceive you or if I had
just told you the moment I found out about the baby...none of this
would’ve happened. Please don’t blame yourself. Please, baby,
don’t. We’re going to get through this…you and me together. Just
promise me one thing.”

“God, I would promise you the world,
Ari.”

“Please don’t ever let me feel like I felt
when you left me today. I never want to feel like that again.”

I gently moved her onto my lap and kissed
her. The kiss soon turned passionate, and Ari let a soft moan
escape her mouth. I just wanted to lose myself in her.

“Make love to me, Jeff.”

I had to start laughing. “Um, did you forget
where we were, baby?”

Ari looked around the hospital room and made
a face.

“Fuck a duck.”

Just then the nurse walked and immediately
stopped, staring at us.

“What happened? Why are y’all on the floor?
Ms. Peterson, why are you on the floor?”

“I’m not on the floor. I’m on my fiancé’s
lap.”

“Why are you on his lap on the floor?”

“Can I go home now? Please,” Ari said as she
looked at the nurse and gave her a pouty face.

The nurse shook her head as she walked over
to us and looked down. I felt like I was in middle school, and we
just got caught making out.

“Mr.?”

“Johnson, Jeff Johnson.” I smiled up at the
nurse.

She gave me a stern look in
return. Yep, this felt just like middle school, especially knowing
I didn’t want Ari to get up just yet because of my hard-on. Ari
must have been thinking the same thing I was because she took it a
step further as she rubbed her ass on me. Turning to face me, she
gave me a Cheshire Cat grin.
Damn, could I
love her anymore?

I leaned over and kissed her. Pulling
slightly away from her lips, I smiled.

“I love you.”

Ari giggled. “I love you, too.”

“Alright, let’s go. Let me help you up, Ms.
Peterson. Now, take it nice and slow. Once we get you in bed, I
will give you your pain pill.”

After we got Ari back into bed, she slid over
and patted the bed for me to get in. I started to climb on until I
felt a hand on my shoulder pulling me back.

“I don’t think so, Jeff Johnson. If you want
your own bed to lie down in, I can probably arrange that for you
since I’m starting to lose my patience.”

“Wow, where did you go to nursing school?
School of hard knocks?”

“Do you want to stay in here or in the
waiting room?” the nurse asked with a straight face.

Jesus, this nurse was in a mood. Smiling at
her, I put my hands up in defeat as I walked over to the small-ass
sofa to sit down.

“That’s better. Now, Ms. Peterson, is there
anything else I can get you besides some pain medicine?”

Ari smiled and shook her head. The nurse gave
Ari her medicine, and she swallowed the pill. I watched the nurse
help adjust Ari, and then she glanced up at me giving me a dirty
look.

“Good night…” I looked at her name tag.
“Nurse Maggie Jones. Hey, Jay-Z has a song you might like. It’s
called “Hard Knock….”

“Jeff! Let’s allow Ms. Jones to get back to
work now. I’m sure she doesn’t care about any songs.” Ari then
turned to the nurse. “Thank you so much for your help. I promise,
cross my heart.” Ari said, her index finger crossing over her
heart, “that I will not get out of bed. She flashed that beautiful
smile of hers at Maggie.

Maggie smiled at Ari and
then turned and walked over to me.
Why
does this woman make me feel like I’m about to be sent to the
principal’s office?

“I’ve got my eye on you. She needs her rest,
and she isn’t going to get it with you making her get on the floor
and sit on your lap.”

“Wait a minute, I didn’t.”

“Shhh! I will make you sit in the waiting
room all night if you don’t allow her some rest. Do I make myself
clear, Mr. Jeff Johnson?”

I looked up at her. “Did you just shush
me?”

Ari let out a small laugh before she moaned.
Jumping up, I was at her side so fast that Maggie didn’t know what
had happened.

“Ari, are you okay?” I stroked the side of
her face as I leaned down to kiss her.

“Maggie, please, Jeff is fine. What I’d
really like is for us to be left in private, please.”

After another look that surly should have
dropped me dead on the spot, Maggie warned me that she would be
back in two hours to take Ari’s vitals and I better not be in Ari’s
bed.

After she’d left the room, I walked around
the bed and crawled in next to Ari.

***

We talked for the next hour about so many
things: our future, the horses, more kids. Ari cried a few times,
and I tried my best to hold back the tears.

Right before she drifted off into sleep, I
whispered in her ear, “I love you, Ari, so much.”