Riptide Love ( (4 page)

She’d made so many mistakes in her life trying to escape the madness of her parents’ web. Nate was a good boy. And she’d never allow anyone to tell him differently just because of the circumstances of his birth.

“No worries, luv. I know you and Nate will be welcome at my mum’s.”

“And Miller?”

“Miller…” He shook his head. “Might wind up in a bunk house.” For the first time, he didn’t meet her gaze. “Or he can always crash at Co’s or at Ace’s.”

“Ace, your cousin?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

So, she was going to run the only man who’d been nice to her out of his own home. Her hand went to her stomach at the sudden churning.

God, if I’d only had the courage to talk to him…

Stop this. You cannot change the past. Only make up for what you can. This is a start.

“Mummy?” Nate stood at the archway to the living room.

“SpongeBob over?” A smile spread across her lips.

“Can I watch it again?” He nodded, causing his hair to fall forward over his brow. “I like SpongeBob.”

“I know you do.” She laughed. “Sure. Ethan likes SpongeBob too.”

“I didn’t
exactly
say that…”

She lifted a shoulder in shrug. “Think you can start the show over for him?”

“You bet, luv.” He made his way over to her son.
Their son.
She had to get used to this. This sharing business. But was there a need? Was she just opening up her baby for heartache?

The uncertainty of the future would drive her to distraction.

Denae barely got her bedroom door closed before tears overflowed her lowered eyelids. Tonight, she’d talk to her baby about daddies and she’d tell him that Ethan was his.

Ethan sat in the beach chair and watched De play with Nate in the surf.

The boy wanted to go in deeper, but De wouldn’t let him in past his knees. Ethan kept a keen eye on the water. For the second time in his life, he was uncertain.

It didn’t matter that they were on a beach with life-savers, or clearly within the safety flags. Even at the beach’s edge, Nate was small compared to the crashing waves. He knew how dangerous that water could be.

Christ, he doubted the boy was able to swim yet.

Hand in hand, the pair splashed in the shallows.

He eyeballed De’s arse again. Lust stirred, thickening his prick. Enjoying the feeling of arousal as much as he did the view, he studied her figure.

De wore a two-piece. Only it wasn’t like the two-piece he recalled from their past. Back then, she’d worn the tiniest string bikini ever. One he’d used his teeth to untie.

He shifted as his semi-erection went wood stiff.

The old flame he’d had for her hadn’t gone out. Hadn’t extinguished. He was in bloody trouble. She’d visited him quite regularly in his dreams. He’d assumed the fantasies had been born out of the guilt he’d felt about his treatment of her. But not so. Much more was going on.

His gaze lingered over her curves hidden beneath the material. The two-piece she wore now covered a great deal more skin. Though how the top separated from the waistband of the shorts caused him to salivate. He wanted to explore the exposed inch or two of skin.

The way she’d pull it back down into place made him even hotter.

“I see someone is getting himself an eyeful.”

Ethan glanced up to see Paige standing at his side.

“Found us, huh?” When De had mentioned her cousin planned to join them later, he’d wished for more alone time instead.

“I just looked for the biggest flea on the beach.” The woman smirked.

Ethan ground his teeth together. He wouldn’t get into an insult match with a woman. Though he’d enjoyed many in the past with his brothers and cousins.

Abruptly, Nate broke away from De to race up to Paige. He threw his little arms around her legs. “Paige.”

“G’day to you too, Nate.” She rubbed the boy’s head. “Did you save me some lunch? You know I’m eating for two.”

Nate laughed. “Mummy made us wait.”

“Hey, I brought a small cooler and radio.” Paige waved in the direction of the parking lot.

She eased out of Nate’s embrace. “Maybe you can show the buffoon here to my car? We can’t sit here without music.”

Tight-lipped, he purposely allowed his gaze to bore into Paige’s.

“Paige, not in front of Nate.” De shook her head.

Amazingly, he kept his mouth shut. Though he understood somewhat why the woman disliked him so much. But he wouldn’t be able to put up with too many insults in front of Nate.

“What’d I do?” Paige’s smirk was back in place.

“What’s buffoon?” Nate looked questioningly from De to Paige.

De opened her mouth, but Paige beat her to it. “It’s a big monkey.”

At the insult, he brought his hands up to rest on his hips. Christ, the sheila was pushing it…

Nate made a face. “Ethan’s not a monkey.”

“
Paige…
” De spread out a beach blanket. “Nate, think you can show Ethan to Paige’s car?”

“Yes, Mummy.” The boy nodded excitedly.

“Keep hold of his hand, all right?”

Ethan swallowed before reaching out for the boy’s small hand. Christ it was small. And soft. He clasped it gently with his fingers as they walked along.

Along the edge of the pavement, he urged the boy to a stop. Over his shoulder, he saw De help Paige down. Within seconds, the two women were engaged in conversation.

He gazed down at Nate. “So, what kind of car are we looking for?”

“A red car.”

Glancing around, he counted eight vehicles in different shades of red. That was helpful. “Anything else?”

“Uh-huh, it’s Paige’s car.”

Ethan smiled. “Okay, then.” Now, he knew why he had Nate with him. The women would have plenty of time to talk. He ran his free hand through his hair. He wasn’t sure if leaving the two alone was a good idea. Would De smooth things over with Paige? “Is it a truck?”

“It’s a red car.” Nate shuffled a rock under his toe.

They were now down to six choices. Why he hadn’t asked after the car’s make and model before he’d left the beach, he’d never know. He smiled at his own idiocy. Dealing with an ankle biter was real work. And the women had known what he was in for.

“Is the car big or small?”

Nate appeared puzzled. “All cars are big.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Of course to a three-year-old they were all big.

“So which one do you think is Paige’s?” He wasn’t going back to ask. He’d find it if he had to try them all.

“The red broken one.”

“Broken one?”

“Uh-huh, the broken one.”

“She had an accident?”

“No.” Nate shook his head.

A frown creased his brow. He didn’t see De until she was at their side.

An engaging smile lit her face up. “I’ll collect Paige’s things.”

He grunted.

She still smiled.

Damn if he didn’t want to kiss her. He could still recall the first time she’d smiled at him. Lust flickered to life. The look had made him feel about sixteen again. So captivated in the expression that night he had kissed her full on her pouty lips. He took a half step forward. Right now, the urge to claim her was just as strong.

“Nate, Paige has you a plate.”

The boy took off at a run toward their spot on the beach.

“I was set up.” He tried for a glare but knew he wasn’t pulling it off.

De shrugged a shoulder. “Maybe. Help yourself. I made cheese and peanut butter sandwiches.”

“Thanks a heap, I will.”

She was first to turn away. Her strides were long as she headed toward a red car.

His prick twitched as he looked on. A craving beat in his blood. He wanted De. Could no longer deny the need. One question burned in his brain. Would she be as responsive as he remembered? Would her pussy be as hot? Her legs and arms as clingy? Or her mouth as sweet?

He forced himself to turn away when she moved off the sidewalk. A swim. A swim would ease some of the tension and hopefully some of the arousal De had stirred up in him.

By the time he joined them again, Paige sat in his chair, so he sat on the blanket.

“I hope you don’t mind. Paige’s not feeling well today.” De wrapped her arms around her knees and watched Nate play in the sand.

“Not at all.” He dried his hair some with a towel before wiping his face, neck and chest off.

“You hungry?” De pushed to her feet and moved to a cooler.

“Yeah, thanks.”

“Cheese or peanut butter? We have chips. Sliced fruit. Water…”

“I can’t believe you’re waiting on him.” Nearby, Paige wiggled her feet.

Ethan stared. The woman’s toes resembled fat sausages.

“Paige…” De straightened. “You promised.”

“What?” Paige’s mouth twisted.

His spine stiffened at the look. Now what was the sheila doing?

De waved her to silence, not that it worked.

“I can’t believe you’re going with the man into the never-never either.”

“Listen here, Paige.” Ethan regarded first one woman, then the next. “What De and I decide is none of your business.”

Paige snorted, ignoring him—she had eyes only for De. “It’s the truth. At least leave Nate with me.”

“Paige, I explained everything…”

He didn’t care for the anxiety he heard in De’s voice. It knotted in his guts.

“Did you explain it to
him
?” Paige turned stormy eyes his way. “Did you?”

What the hell? What was he missing?

“Ethan. His name is Ethan.” De shook her head. “Will you please stop…for now.”

“Explain what?” By Christ, if there was something else he should know and she kept it from him…

“I don’t think she should go anywhere near those fanatic religious freaks she calls parents.”

“OhmyGod, Paige!” De’s hands went around her middle protectively. “That’s enough.”

“Mummy?” With big blue eyes, Nate looked up from where he sat a short distance away.

Fanatic religious freaks?

Ethan stood and released a breath.

Fanatic religious freaks?

Just what kind of religious zealots were her parents? She hadn’t mentioned a word about her parents before… As if sucker punched, he closed his eyes. Oh, Christ. Had Miller known what her parents were like? Had Big M tried to protect her somehow?

“De?” He thumbed to the water. “I want to talk to you a minute.”

“I thought you were hungry.”

“It can wait.”

“Oh.” Clear panic showed in her green orbs. “Oh, okay.”

Paige wiggled her toes. “Natey, come bury my toes. The cool sand will feel heavenly on them.”

Nate laughed, snatching up his bucket and shovel.

De fell into step with him.

“Luv, I can’t tell you how many mistakes I made with you in the past.” His right hand came up to rest along the small of her back where skin peeked out. Fingers trembling, he caressed her silken skin. Desire for more intimacy brought him closer to the warmth of her body. “But I want to start over, and I want to know about the real you…all of it. Let’s try being friends, all right?”

“Friends will be fine.” She stopped, turned to face him head on. His hand fell away. “But friends don’t have to know
everything
about one another.”

Ethan folded his arms so as not to touch her again.
Bugger me
. He wanted to know all there was to De. “All right, I’ll give you that. But about what Paige said…”

“I don’t want to talk about my past. I’ll never expose Nate to their beliefs…” She released a breath. “I’ve moved on.”

“De, luv, from what I’ve seen you’ve done great for you and Nate, but I want to know.” Muscles in his back bunched in growing strain. He didn’t want to push her but he had to ask. “I need to know one thing.” He understood her inability to speak to him about intimate things. He’d done her wrong. Maybe in time they’d find a way to talk. “Just answer one question about your past, for me?”

“One question.” The tiniest hint of a quiver made her mouth tremor before she compressed her lips.

“Did my brother know what your parents were like?”

She nodded. That was it. After the nod, she walked away.

Oh, fuck.

This development should give him some type of relief. But it didn’t. It made things worse. Now he suspected Miller hadn’t loved or been in love with De. Big M was the only person he knew who’d play knight for anyone. Miller had spent his childhood doing so for their mum and C…and him.

A shuttering breath shook his frame.

Bugger me.

Miller could be so bloody tight-lipped about everything. Ethan could’ve made everything right if he’d only talked to M in the beginning. As much as he cared for his brother, he’d never tried to get past the walls he’d erected. M was comparable to a bloody mountain because all anyone saw was exposed surface. He never let anyone close. Maybe if he'd tried harder. Maybe if he'd pried into his brother's business.

Chapter Four

Denae turned an eye on the clock and sighed. Ethan was over an hour late. Nearly two hours late. Maybe he wasn’t coming? Maybe he’d changed his mind about Nate…about everything.

Or… Oh God, what if he had a family?

The possibility was a real one. A wife. Children… Or at least a girlfriend. What if he hadn’t been able to get away from them? Though if he was in a committed relationship that’d be the least of her worries.

Why didn’t you ask about his private life when you had the chance?

Because right now, she didn’t want to pry. No, she hadn’t wanted him to pry into her life, into her past. The only thing that mattered was making sure things were settled between Ethan and Nate. If Ethan had a family or girlfriend waiting at home for him…they were his business. Not hers.

Though it seemed like he’d have mentioned them.

She shook her head and the momentary worry away. Besides, in her heart she doubted he’d settled down. The night she’d met him, she hadn’t been the only woman he’d flirted with. Danced with. No. There’d been several. She still didn’t know why he’d singled her out. But she could still clearly recall how thrilled she’d been at his attention.

Sweet sensations fluttered low in her stomach. When he’d kissed her she’d nearly melted on the dance floor.

God, what he must have thought that night as he made rounds in that club. Ethan Thorn was a player out for tally marks on his scorecard.

“Mummy, play with me.” Nate wrecked the little car he held in his fingers with a noise.

“It’s bedtime, tiger.” She bumped the car against a spare truck sitting nearby. “We need to pick the toys up.”

“I don’t like going to bed.” He picked up a second car to zip around on the floor. “I don’t like picking up.”

“I know.” She kept the grin back. “I’m Mummy, I know everything about you.”

He gave her a cheeky grin, ignoring her request to pick the cars up. So she crossed her legs and set about doing most of the chore herself with a little assistance from him. She made it a game where whoever got the most cars in their hands at one time won.

Nate claimed a few of his favorites before she dumped a few others into the bucket where they kept his cars stored.

“We had a fun day today, didn’t we, tiger?”

“Uh-huh, Mummy.” He didn’t look up from where he smashed cars into one another “I like the beach.” Smiling, he met her gaze. “I like Ethan.”

“He is nice.” Ethan promised Nate he’d teach him to swim. She’d given it a go herself, but Nate was so young. She didn’t have the skills to teach him properly. “I’m glad you like Ethan.”

Nate concentrated on his toys.

Denae monitored the seconds going by on the wall clock. Her shoulders slumped in both disappointment and relief. The man wasn’t coming by. She snatched up three more cars and put them away. No way was she going to discuss Ethan further with Nate since the man wasn’t even here.

Nate was too young to understand most of the gist of the talk anyway. Besides, what if Ethan changed his mind altogether?

“Okay, tiger, playtime’s up.” She picked up another handful of cars, leaving him with only the ones he held.

“Mummy.” A high quality entered his voice as he shook his head. “I don’t like bed.”

“I know, Nate.” Thankful she still had the power to manage him, she stood and scooped him up.

“Mummy…” His arms wrapped around her neck.

As she turned toward the hallway, the doorbell rang.

Nate straightened in her arms.

Placing him on her hip, she made her way to the door for a look-see. Outside, Ethan stood in his work clothes.

Her heart set to beating a rapid dance. He had come after all. Jitters hit her hard. Half nervous, half happy she let him in. Seeing him standing there, heat rushed through her breasts. Yes, despite her misgivings, she was happy to see him.

“De, I’m sorry…”

She waved him deeper into the apartment so she could close the door. Even though he’d interrupted Nate’s bedtime, she let it slide. “That’s all right. Nate’s glad you made it.” More than likely he didn’t know children. They’d talk about boundaries soon enough.

“That so, mate?”

“Uh-huh.” Nate ran a car up her arm. “I don’t like bedtime.”

Ethan’s smile was quick to show. “Christ, I could use a good night’s sleep.”

Yes, boundaries needed to be discussed. He’d need to watch his language. “Oh, hey.” She took a good look at Ethan in the fresh light of the entryway. Tiredness etched across his face in fine lines. “We can talk another time. You’re tired. Tomorrow’s fine.”

“Nope, I’ve got time now. I expected to be here sooner. I got called out for a late retrieval.” He shrugged a shoulder. “And then had paperwork to get done.”

Nate wiggled to get down so she set him on his feet. He was quick to move away. Within seconds, she heard cars being dumped out.

Denae sighed. “I’m sorry about…” God, she hadn’t considered all the aspects of his career. Although she’d spent many hours worrying about him, retrievals and paperwork hadn’t crossed her mind. She waved her hand. “Work.”

“Listen, De, I’ll try not to be late in the future.”

Her fingers itched to rub the tired lines away from his face. To scrub at the light scruff that now covered his cheeks and chin. On an urge to touch him she moved closer. “I don’t think that’s something you can promise in your career.” His career was time-consuming and very dangerous. She shivered. On the job she’d want him to be completely focused. Not worrying about the time.

Thick lashes lowered to half mast. “I guess not.”

“Besides, this is for Nate.” She smiled in an attempt to make this easier for him. “And he can’t tell time yet.”

Ethan treated her to a smile.

She inhaled sharply before side-saddling past him. Her nipples hardened at the light brush of their bodies. The shockwave of their connection nestled between her thighs. His smile was something she’d love to get used to seeing. It was as sexy as it was boyish. “Are you hungry? I made extra for dinner.” On the way to the kitchen, she stepped into Nate’s view. “Tiger, Ethan’s going to visit for a little while, so you got lucky.” She blew him a kiss. “Bedtime in a half hour. And no whining about it.”

“Yay!” Nate’s grin spread from ear to ear.

She grinned back.

In the kitchen, she whipped up a salad while Ethan sat.

“Here’s a start.” Quietly, she placed the bowl and two types of dressings in front of him. Guessing moo juice, she asked anyway, “Water or milk?”

“Milk.” He shifted to sit up straighter. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” At the microwave, she took her time heating a chicken breast and a baggie of vegetables. Heat stained her neck and face while she performed the domestic chore of making him a meal. She eyed the counter. Once upon a time what wicked things he’d done to her in the kitchen. God, what the man had done with ice…

Wild sensations burst in liquid fire. Her clit tingled.

Scrunching her thighs together she attempted to hang onto the flicking desire.

“I told my team about Nate.” He cleared his throat. “About being a father.”

She gasped. “Oh.” Tension knotted her abdomen. Focus woman. There’d be no more ice play in her future. Or peanut-butter body painting either. Or Ethan Thorn for that matter. “How…” She swallowed. “How’d that go?”

“They were as surprised as I was… But I got a few slaps on the back. I also took two weeks off. I had the time coming, so it’s no problem.”

“Oh.” A trembling took hold in her fingertips. Two weeks was a long time. “I don’t think I can take two weeks. I mean, I know I can’t.” She had to save her time off, any vacation time, for the days Nate got sick, to care for him. He was her responsibility.

That was just how life went for a working mother.

“Ethan, I wanted to talk to you about Nate.”

“You bet. What do you want to talk about?”

“Would you mind if we gave him a few days to get to know you before we tell him you’re his father?” She took a breath and rushed on. “I know you wanted to tell him right away…”

“Listen, I’m here. We can take our time telling him if you think it’s best. I understand he’s just an ankle biter.”

Relief shuddered through her. “Thank you.”

“I’m not going to wait to tell my family though. How much time can you take off, luv?”

“Six days including the weekend.” That was stretching things for her. Time off was so valuable.

“That’ll work. I can spend the rest of my break with Nate here.”

“Oh, okay.” Alone? Ethan planned to spend time alone with her baby. Briefly, she closed her eyes. Their baby. She had to remember that.

“Luv, you’re willing to travel home with me?”

“For Nate, yes.” She arranged his meal on a clean plate and took it over to him.

“Thanks.” He turned the plate around so the chicken was closer to him. “Is Wednesday enough time to make arrangements?”

“Yeah. Nate will be thrilled.”

“Other than explaining things about Nate, I’m already looking forward to the trip.”

Her heart went out to him. Of course telling his brothers, especially Miller, and his mum about Nate would be difficult. “Well, that’s good.” It was nice at least one of them was looking forward to the trip. She sure wasn’t. But she’d do her best to make the most of the trip. “I’m going to check on him.”

“Tiger, Ethan wants to help tuck you in tonight. That okay?”

Nate didn’t move from where he lay on the corner of the couch. The boy looked sleepy.

“How does that sound, mate?” He scratched at his chest feeling his pounding heart. Who’d ever thought putting an ankle biter to bed would make him nervous? He couldn’t deny it. This bedtime routine was a memory in the making.

“I don’t like bed.”

“This is where I just pick him up and carry him to bed.” De bent over to collect the last of the scattered toys.

Ethan took advantage of the opportunity to admire her arse. Lust rushed his blood full throttle. His prick filled out, thickening. As his mouth watered with desire to tuck De into bed.

Eh, he’d like to put De to bed. And stay there for an hour or two. No other activity would put a bloke to sleep for a good night’s rest like fucking.

But first things first. Nate’s comfort needed to be seen to.

“I’m not sleepy.” Nate’s eyes were nearly slits.

“I am.” Or he was until he’d gotten a delectable eyeful of De. “Come on, mate.” He scooped the boy up and placed him over his shoulder, earning laughter.

De straightened. “You don’t want to get him started now…”

A frown tightened his forehead. All he’d done was pick Nate up.

She sighed and led their way down the hallway. In their son’s room, she pulled the covers back and took Nate from him. “Ethan’s going to put you to bed like Paige and Jack have done from time to time but I need my goodnight kiss.”

With a huge, sleepy grin, he kissed her. He didn’t struggle when she put him in the bed.

Ethan gave silent thanks.

“I sit on the beanbag here beside the bed for a few minutes. I sometimes read to him. Or talk to him. It soothes him.” She leaned down and kissed Nate again.

If only she’d give him a goodnight kiss, he’d go to bed a dozen times a day.

“Well.” She stood straight. “I’m going to take a quick bath. I’ll be in the living room by the time you’re done here.”

“Thanks a heap, De.” He meant it. De was being accommodating, which he appreciated.

She offered him the smallest of smiles, before facing Nate one last time. “Night, baby. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Night, Mummy.”

Under Nate’s watchful gaze, he eased onto the chair. Amazingly, it didn’t pop under his weight.

“I’m not tired.” A yawn belied that statement.

“Your peepers say differently.” His chest tightened as he observed his sleepy son. De had done great with the boy. She’d done the boy proud.

“What’s peepers?”

“Eyes. Your eyelids are drooping like an old hound dog,”

“I’m not a dog.” Nate rolled onto his belly, his face toward him. “I like dogs.”

“Like dogs, huh?” He stretched out and put his head against the wall. “We’ve got a dozen dogs on the station. Would you like to see them? One day?”

“I like dogs.” Nate lifted his head to brace his chin in a hand. “You got puppies?”

“Probably. A bitch is always having a litter.”

The boy snickered and ducked his head back down. “Jack says that word.”

“Oh, eh.” Dammit. Not much got by the boy.

“Mummy don’t like bad words.”

“Sorry about that, mate.” He’d have to watch his tongue. Hell, Nate was about to get an earful on the station. He supposed since he worked with the public, he’d learned to curb his language. His brothers and cousins tended to curse with every breath. To them cursing was a normal part of language.

“Jack likes bad words.”

He bit back a grin. Apparently cussing was everyday speech for Jack too. “You want to go see our dogs?”

“Is Mummy going with us?”

“She is.” The boy was worried about being away from his mother. He’d noticed throughout the day, the two were close. He liked that a lot. A whole lot. Knowing firsthand De had taken such good care of Nate pleased him. As well as eased his mind.

“I like dogs.”

“Well, mate, why don’t you go to sleep and dream about puppies?”

Nate grew quiet, but every once in a while he opened his eyes, peeking. A few minutes later, De surprised them both by joining them.

With her sexy legs bare, she stepped over his outstretched legs and climbed into the small bed with Nate. The boy rolled over to press his face into De’s body.

They made a nice picture.

It was a few minutes before De lifted up partway. “He’s asleep.” She eased over her son to stretch a foot to the floor. When her second foot touched down, he caught her hand in his. Though he acted to help her over him, he wanted to drag her down to the floor with him.

A thrill rolled though his bloodstream as the touch lingered. His prick hardened. Pressed against the confines of his pants.

“Oh.” She let out a gasp alerting him to the fact she felt the heat between them.

He had trouble catching his own breath. It’d been like this for them before… Instant combustion.