Resolution (Saviour) (43 page)

I start to cry again as I think about how terrified I felt, that was the moment I realised how massively I had fucked up and all I could think about was keeping my babies safe
. “I fought him. Stopped him from dragging me back in the house. He was manic and I knew I had to stay calm. He wanted to burn the car and as he walked towards it, I locked myself in here and called the police and then you called and then he smashed the doors down and then I tried to run up.” I can’t get my breath as I speak through my sobs. Jo put’s her arm around me. “I tried to run up the stairs but he grabbed my hair and he swung me around and hit me. Then he hit me again and tried. I tried to stay on my feet but I started falling, then the police were here and then you were here. I’m sorry, I’m truly sorry, I thought it would be safe. I would never put the babies in danger, never, I just thought it would be okay, he seemed so normal Thursday.”

Jo is sobbing next to me, Jake has his hands on his hips and is just staring at Jo and Gabe is looking at me, with a look of I don’t know what in his eyes
. He rakes his hand through his hair and closes his eyes. “I told you Lauren. I forbade you, just the other day, before I left, I told you not to come here. Just once. Just for once in your fucking life could you not have done as you were told?”

I shake my head and mo
uth that I’m sorry over and over again, burying my head in my heads. “For fucks sake Gabe. The girl couldn’t be sorrier, give her a cuddle and let’s get her out of here.” Jake states.

We lock up the house and Jo puts me in the front of my car, she drives me back to Gabe’s, while the boys bring the other two cars. As soon as we are home Jo takes me to the ensuit
e and runs me a bath, I have no problem stripping off in front of her. She’s seen me naked on more than one occasion. She smiles at me and puts her hand on my naked belly. “You have a little miracle happening already. Amazing to think what’s happening in there. All sorts of magic.” I put my hand over hers; it’s so unlike Jo to show her sensitive side.

“
I really fucked up today, I could have lost it all, Gabe would never forgive me if anything had happened to these.”

“
Well it didn’t. It’s not like he’s never fucked up and he seems to forget. He didn’t exactly behave like father of the year whilst Nina was pregnant. Get in, mind it’s not too hot, you shouldn’t have hot baths when you’re pregnant.” I feel my shoulders stiffen at her words.

“
I know, I have been pregnant twice before.”

“
Sit down and shut up.” That’s the end of sensitive Jo then! Gabe walks in with a shot glass and looks at me with concern. The coldness has left his eyes, now he just looks worried.

“
Drink this. Do you need some ice for that lip or your cheek?”

I run my tongue over the split on the left side of my bottom lip and shake my head
. I sniff what’s in the shot glass. “Its brandy, it will help relax you a little bit.”

“
It’s alcohol. No, I don’t want it.” Jo gets up and leaves, sensing there’s likely to be another argument. Gabe lets out a long sigh. “Just drink the fucking drink Lauren. For fucks sake.” I knock it back. “Thank you; wasn’t hard was it?”

I look up at him from the bath, he has his grey suit trousers on, his white shirt now has the sleeves rolled up to the elbows and is completely untucked, is hair is a dirty blonde mess and he has stubble on his jaw
. He looks so handsome and I hate that he is so angry with me. “Can I get you anything else?”

“
Can you wash my back?”

The look in his eye changes in an instant and I see that spark
. I shift slightly in the water and my nipples peak out through the bubbles, he sits down on the edge of the bath and leans across to my left nipple and squeezes it between his finger and thumb. “I’ve missed you.” He whispers. I shake my head. “Not as much as I’ve missed you.” He runs his middle three fingers down my chest, through my cleavage, down to my belly button, he stops and opens his big palm wide over my lower belly and looks into my eyes. “You are in so much trouble Lauren. Perhaps I should try and fuck some sense into ya?”

“
Promises, promises” I whisper.

He shakes his head at me, his eyes bright and alive now, looking right into mine
. “You scared the fuck out of me. Don’t ever, go behind my back or defy me like that again, are we clear?” I nod. “Are we clear Lauren, I want to hear you say it.” I want to say ‘fuck off’, ‘don’t tell me what to do’, but I know I have fucked up majorly today and what I did was stupid, putting not only myself but my unborn children in danger. What was I thinking? Jason’s a junkie; I still can’t get my head around it.

“
We’re clear Gabe, very clear. I will never put myself or the babies in danger like that again. I really am sorry.” A lone tear travels down my cheek and he wipes it off with his thumb and sucks it into his mouth. I laugh through my sob. “You look so fucking hot when you do that. You did that the night we met.”

“
I know, and I will never forget the look on your face when I did; my cock was so hard for you I thought I was going to bust the zip in those stupid skinny chino things Ava made me buy.”

It’s the first time he’s ever told me this and my belly squirms
. “You got a hard on for me? That first night?”

“
Lauren. Baby, I have been hard for you since the moment I set eyes on you. I have never been affected by a woman like I am you, it’s embarrassing, I had more control when I was thirteen and hormonal than I do now. We sat in a meeting with all the big wigs from the South Australian Health Department, and their finance and legal teams yesterday, and all I could think about was when you dressed up as my naughty secretary and I fucked you over my desk. I missed half of what was being said, Coop kicked me more than once and the woman taking notes looked at me like I was mad when I called her Ms Day. After she had just told me her name was Michelle.”

We smile at each other for a long moment
. “Get in, come and wash my back.”

“
I would rather wash your front.”

“
Well come and wash my front then. Or just come, as long as it’s with me, inside me, I don’t mind.” He laughs, a little giggle, that’s so unlike him. “You. Lauren, have a dirty, dirty mind.”

“
You love my dirty mind.”

“
Fucking oath I do.”

He strips out of his clothes and slides in behinds me
, pulling my back into his chest, he crosses his arms over my chest and cups each of my boobs, brushing his thumbs over my nipples. I shiver. “You cold baby? Turn the hot water back on.”

“
I’m not cold, I’m horny.”

Jo walks through the door at that moment
. “Oooookaaaaay. I can see we are all good here, we shall let ourselves out, give us a shout if you need anything, love yas lots”

“
Like Jelly Tots.” We both call out.

We soak in the bath for a long while, we seem to have some of our best conversations here, we discuss what happened today and the fact that I need to speak to both of the boys, Gabe has already rung the police but they are not sure what they are going to charge Jason with yet, I’m not so much worried about charges this time, I just want him to get the help he so obviously needs. When Gabe decides that the babies have been in the water too long, I am ordered out, he wraps me in a towel, then takes me to our bed and worships every inch of me
; one hour and two orgasms later, I am dressed in a hoodie and yoga pants, sitting on a stool at the bench top giving my account of what happened this morning to two police officers; Jay has been sectioned and admitted to a psychiatric unit at The Alfred, he will be assessed there before any charges will be laid but there is no chance of him getting out; I spoke to Ryder earlier and he is on his way over, for some reason, Gabe has called Cooper and Zac to come over too, although I’m not exactly sure why.

The police leave as Ryder arrives… He looks at me and simply asks
“Dad?” I nod, I can already feel my bottom lip wobble; Gabe leans against the bench top, his hand at his jaw as he looks between me and Ryder

“
You wanna beer mate?”

Ryder looks at my split lip
. “I reckon I’m gonna need one mate. Cheers.”

Gabe takes two beers from the fridge and pops the caps, he passes one to Ryder who takes a deep swig, then comes and sits next to me on the sofa and takes hold of my hand
.

“
Did Dad do this?” I nod and proceed to tell him all that happened this morning and all that we have found out, I cry as I tell Ryder, I feel like such a failure, I should have known, I should have realised. How many times were my children in danger whilst in his care? Gabe comes and sits the other side of me, his arm around my shoulder; Ryder has silently shed tears as I have talked and my heart is breaking for him. He idolises his Dad, he’s always been much more of a Daddy’s boy than a Mummy’s and I cannot begin to imagine how hard all of this is to hear. He drains his bottle and puts the empty down on the floor, then takes my hand in both of his.

“
You are and always have been a great Mum. Don’t ever think otherwise, what he did, what he’s done to you, to us, it’s not your fault. He’s a grown man Mum; he’s responsible and accountable for his own actions. He’s lied to all of us. To you especially, all these years, he’s lived a lie, that’s not your fault Mum, it’s really not. I’m fucking ashamed of him, he’s a dirty scumbag junkie. I’m done with him. If he ever comes near you again, I will fucking kill him, I swear to God.”

“
Don’t say that Ryde, he’s sick, he needs help.”

“
Then why didn’t he ask for it? All this time I’ve been trying to keep the business afloat, robbing Peter to pay Paul, working my arse off for next to nothing and the money’s just been going up his nose.”

“
What do you mean? Is the business doing badly then? Why has nobody told me? What about the units? The rent money from them, where’s that been going?”

Mine and Jason’s finances are pretty complicated
. On paper he owns the family home, I own four units that we developed and rent out. One of them to Ryder, who lives there rent free as part of his wage package, the business is owned by the three of us, myself Jason and Ryder, we bought Sonny out when he wanted the money to buy a property in the UK, but as far as the solicitors are concerned, any proceeds from property sales are to be split equally between the four of us. I have no idea, it’s the way the accountants and lawyers advised us to set things up so I just signed on the dotted line and went with it.

“
The business is just scraping by Mum; the rent money is what has been keeping us going, only because I pay the blokes out of it before Dad gets to touch it. The last year or so, he’s just been drawing larger and larger amounts out of the business. Would seem now, we know why.”

The gates to the drive slide open and Gabe stands up
. “That’ll be Zac and Coop, I’ll just let them in.” I watch him go down the stairs, he’s wearing trackies and a hoodie and his feet are bare. God, I love his bare feet!

There are kisses, cuddles and handshakes all round from the boys
and then the beers are passed around. Basically what follows over the next hour or so is a discussion on all things construction. The boys, it turns out have won the contract to build the new hospital in South Australia, it’s a massive job, bigger than anything else they have taken on and is worth millions. What they are proposing is to buy Jason’s business out, take on all of his staff and contracts and offer Ryder a job as part of the team managing the soon to be set up South Australia arm of the business. All of the Wilde boys have families and are settled in Victoria, but for a young and single Ryder, it could be a great opportunity, SA isn’t the most exciting of places granted but they are offering a great package and the chance to work on some of their other projects around Melbourne, once SA is set up.

I head into the kitchen and make myself a cup of tea and zone out after a while;
it’s more information than I can take for one day so I take my tea to the bedroom and read a book on my kindle as I drink it. I must fall asleep at some stage as when I wake later, I am cocooned by the throw from the end of the bed and it’s dark outside, I slide my leg out and feel for Gabe but his side of the bed is empty, I turn onto my back and think about today’s events, going over and over them in my head, no matter how many times I replay my life, I just cannot believe that I have spent most it with a man that was coked out of his head or more recently high on meth. I sit up and the room spins, my lip is still sore but all things considered, physically, I’m okay. Mentally, I have no idea where I’m at and now I have to ring Sonny and let him know.

I get up and wander out to the family room; I stand and lean against the wall as I look at the site that is Gabe lying on the sofa
. His long frame covers one whole end, he’s lying on his back, one arm bent and tucked under the back of his head, his other arm out straight, holding the remote as he points it at the telly and flicks through the channels, I get this tingling in my belly as I watch him, it’s like a mild electrical current or how it must feel to be a piece of metal when there is a magnet around. That’s how it feels, like little fingers of sensation, reaching out for him, he’s the magnet and I’m as useless as a paper clip at trying to resist his pull I watch as he smiles that sexy arsed lazy smile of his as he says. “See something ya like?”