Out of the Blue (21 page)

Luke Aaron Carlisle.

It didn’t look a thing like the high school boyfriend I remembered. The Luke I had known had honey-blond hair and clear light blue eyes; he had looked like the typical American boy next door. The Luke in front of me now didn’t look even remotely the same. There were no features that I could point to and say, “Yes, that’s Luke.” I was looking at a completely different person.

Tears forming, my vision blurred, but I couldn’t look away from Luke’s picture. My throat closed, and when it was clear I wasn’t going to say anything, Cam told me Luke’s story.

“Luke didn’t end up going to college like he planned. Not long after high school, he fell in with the wrong crowd and started doing harder drugs, not just the weed but the heavy kind. Over the years, his parents sent him to rehab a couple of times, but it didn’t work.” Cam’s voice grew softer the longer he spoke. “Luke ended up turning tricks on the street for drug money… He died from a meth overdose two years ago… His body wasn’t found until a week later… in an abandoned warehouse known to house addicts.” Cam’s voice was quiet as he told me how he found the information. After a few phone calls pretending to be someone from my senior class, he found out about Luke’s shady history. Cam knew a cop who owed him a favor, who had a friend who worked law enforcement in Illinois.

Despite my tears that fell onto Luke’s mugshot, I was numb. The lump remained in my throat, and I couldn’t drag my eyes from Luke’s, although I didn’t think it was him I was crying for.

“I’m sorry, babe. I didn’t want to drag up old memories, but I wanted to show you that… that I’m not Luke.” Cam’s voice cracked, and I tore my eyes away from the mugshot. Looking at my boyfriend of ten years, I saw matching tears running down his cheeks.

I missed Cam.

I loved Cam.

And no, he wasn’t Luke.

He never had been.

My attention was diverted by my phone vibrating in my pocket. Pulling it out, I considered not answering, but Brenda never called me, she always let Aunt Cece do it, and my heart hammered for an entirely different reason.

I thumbed the phone. “Brenda, this isn’t really a good time—”

She cut me off, and shocked, I sought Cam’s eyes. I grabbed his hand to ground me as Brenda continued quickly, then hung up before I could say anything else.

Tears flowing, I dropped the phone into my lap.

“Babe?”

“It’s Aunt Cece… she’s had a heart attack.” The words I needed wouldn’t come.
I need to get to St. Joseph’s. I need to see her and tell her I love her one last time. I need to be there for Brenda.

I need you.

Cameron

The drive to St. Joseph’s Hospital took far too long and Jake mumbled to himself the entire time. I don’t think he knew he was talking, but I got the information I needed anyway.

Aunt Cece. Heart attack. St. Joseph’s
.

Need you.

I held on tightly to Jake’s hand the entire trip, only letting go when I needed it to drive. We arrived at the hospital, and I did all the talking. I asked for Cecilia Morris and explained who we were, because I didn’t think Jake was capable of talking. His eyes were glassy with unshed tears, and he had that faraway look. His grip on my hand was tight but he wasn’t with me, and I could only imagine what he was thinking about. Probably his parents.

The nurse behind the desk informed us that Cece was in the cardiac ward and we should head to the waiting room on the third floor.

Brenda jumped out of her seat when we arrived and threw her arms around Jake’s neck, sobbing into his chest. I moved to let them have their moment, but Jake wouldn’t release my hand as he hugged her with one arm.

No sooner had Brenda released Jake than she was in my arms hugging me just as tightly. I hugged her with one arm since Jake still wouldn’t release my hand. Brenda cried into my chest. “We’ve missed you,” she whispered.

Ah shit
. I had missed her too.

We sat in the generic plastic chairs that seem to furnish every hospital while Brenda told us what had happened. When Brenda had recognized the symptoms, she’d called for an ambulance while Cece brushed her off and told her not to be such a fuss-pot.

Jake never released my hand and he didn’t speak, never said a word, and I could only imagine what thoughts were running through his head. His unshed tears didn’t fall, but they never left his eyes.

After what seemed like an eternity, a short, stocky gray-haired man came through the swinging doors.

“Mrs. Morris?”

Jake and Brenda stiffened in unison, and we all stood, awaiting the news.

“I’m Mrs. Morris,” Brenda said in a quiet voice I didn’t think she had.

“I’m Dr. Bradshaw. I’ve been monitoring Cecelia’s condition since she arrived. She had a mild cardiac event due to a small clot in one of her arteries. She has undergone thrombolysis, a procedure which injects a clot-dissolving agent to restore adequate blood flow. She was very lucky you called 911 when you did. It could’ve been a lot worse. We ran some tests, including an EKG, and we have her attached to a heart monitor. She’s stable at the moment and asking for you if you’d like to see her.” Dr. Bradshaw turned to us, and Brenda almost collapsed with relief. “One visitor at a time, if you don’t mind. Even though she’s feisty, her body has gone through quite an ordeal, and it will take some time to recover.” Although Dr. Bradshaw was blunt and to the point, his eyes were kind when he smiled.

“What’s the prognosis?” I asked since it seemed that neither Jake nor Brenda could speak yet.

“Cecelia is in good health for her age, and with a few dietary changes and some medication to keep her blood pressure down, I don’t see why she couldn’t make a full recovery. However, this was a warning sign that should not be ignored,” he finished sternly.

“Thank you so much, Doctor.”

“Mrs. Morris, if you’d like to come with me, I’ll show you to your wife. She’s quite the firecracker, isn’t she?” This seemed to bring Brenda out of her funk, and she followed the doctor through the doors with a small smile. Able to breathe easier, I led Jake back to the plastic seats in silence.

Sitting down, Jake loosened his grip on my hand and climbed into my lap, wrapping his arms around my neck as he buried his face in my shoulder and cried. They were tears of relief. Aunt Cece would recover. I hugged his smaller frame, whispering promises in his ear that everything was going to be okay.

Jake’s crying calmed and after a while his breathing became even. I rubbed soothing circles on his back, and soon he was asleep in my arms. He must’ve been emotionally drained, not only from Cece’s heart attack but from my ill-timed information dump about Luke, and it had all caught up to him.

It had been so long since I’d held him and I couldn’t help but feel selfish. If Cece hadn’t had a heart attack and Jake hadn’t gotten that phone call when he did, would I be holding him now? Or would I be trying to hold myself together? I treasured the feel of him so close to me and committed it to memory, since I might never have this opportunity again.

I had rotten timing when it came to showing Jake the picture of his high school boyfriend, and I had no clue how he felt about it. Was that what he needed to realize that I wasn’t Luke? Or did it bring up such horrible memories he wouldn’t be able to separate the two of us? I didn’t know. All I knew was at that moment, the love of my life was asleep in my arms. I hugged him tighter and breathed in his familiar scent.

“I love you,” Jake whispered against my neck. I tilted my head to look at him, but he was still asleep. Was he saying that to me? Or someone in his dreams. Aunt Cece maybe?

“I love you too, babe,” I answered, regardless of whom he was talking to.

Jake remained asleep in my arms when Brenda came out about an hour later shaking her head, a small smile on her face.

“She’s giving the nurses hell, isn’t she?” I whispered, careful not to wake Jake.

“She sure is. Honestly, if I hadn’t seen it myself, I would say there’s nothing wrong with her. Cece’s pale and she looks like she’s been put through the wringer, but her attitude more than makes up for it. Jake asleep?”

“Yeah, once you left, he broke down and cried himself to sleep. He hasn’t moved since.”

“Poor love. I know how much they both mean to each other; Jake must’ve felt like he was about to lose another parent. Cece was asking for him, for both of you. Wake him up so he can go see her. I’m sure once they’ve seen each other, they’ll both be better off.”

“Good idea,” I agreed. “Jake, baby?” I said quietly as I ran my fingers through his hair. “C’mon, babe, Aunt Cece’s asking for you.”

Jake was a little stiff when he got up, not surprising with the position he was in, and it took him a minute to realize where he was. But when his eyes met mine, he smiled, the kind of smile that lit up his features. Cupping my face, he brought his lips to mine, kissing me completely. To say I was stunned would be an understatement.

I shook my head to clear it as I watched as Jake walked through the doors to visit with his aunt.

Jake spent about half an hour with Cece before coming back out. He was brighter, the gleam in his eyes was back, and a small smile played on his lips. He grinned widely at Brenda, then threw himself into my arms and hugged me till I couldn’t breathe.

“Take me home,” Jake sighed into my neck.

Pushing him back gently, I held him at arm’s length as I searched his eyes for his meaning. Love and warmth stared back at me.

Jake nodded once.

“Take me home.”

Jake

Cam drove home from the hospital that night, but not before he stopped in to see Aunt Cece. The doctor was right, she looked like hell, but she was spirited, even in her weakened state, and she complained loudly about not being allowed to drink alcohol. A tough call for someone who owned a winery. Dr. Bradshaw assured us that there was no reason why she couldn’t make a full recovery, she would be fine overnight, and we could visit her tomorrow. Brenda would stay with her, and after saying our goodbyes and with a promise to come in the morning, we headed home.

It was late in the evening when we arrived at our apartment, and Cam was nervously licking his upper lip. He was obviously unsure about us and how to proceed, since up to that point we hadn’t shared more than a brief kiss in months. It was time to alleviate my Romeo’s fears.

I needed him. More than ever.

After closing the front door behind us, I grabbed his upper arms and turned him to me. Cradling his face in my hands, I looked into his warm amber eyes and saw all the love and affection that was always there, only magnified.

Bringing our lips together, I kissed him deeply. And it was
everything
. Every tangled emotion from the past six months, the anger, the hurt, the sense of betrayal, the overwhelming sadness, I poured all of it into that kiss, letting it go. But there was also a deep sense of adoration, happiness and a sense of completion that was just as present.

It was absolute. It was
us.

We broke apart reluctantly when the need for air became too great, and I pulled back to see my tears reflected on Cam’s cheeks. Cam threw his arms around me and buried his face in my shoulder. He sobbed in silence.

I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and hugged him. “Take me to bed, Romeo.”

Cam lifted his head and looked at me, his glassy eyes full of questions.

“Take me to bed,” I stated again.

Cam took my hand and led me to our bedroom. He licked his lip as we stood next to the bed, feeling like teenagers about to embark on their first sexual experience. I grinned.

Cam cradled my cheek with one hand, rubbing his thumb over my stubble. I turned my face and I kissed his palm. “Are you sure?” he asked, his eyes searching mine.

“Never more sure.”

I brought our lips together and kissed him hard. I needed this. I needed
him
.

We tangled ourselves together on the bed, pushing our clothes off with a desperate need to get to each other’s skin.

“Oh god, I’ve missed you,” Cam breathed. He was busy at my throat, sucking, biting, and licking, and I could feel his eagerness. It had been a long time since we’d touched each other, but I could also feel his need to savor, worship, and take it slow.

With Cam on top of me making a meal out of my neck, I spread my legs so he could fit more easily. I bucked my hips, grinding our erections together. Our heated skin slid easily with our combined sweat and precome, and that coupled with the fact that neither of us had had sex for ages, I was ready to blow from just a little frottage.

But I needed more than that. The need to have him inside me again was shattering.

“God, Romeo, fuck me already.”

“You sure?” Cam stopped attacking my throat and leaned up on his elbows, doubt filling his eyes.

I don’t know how, but I managed to still our movements. Cam was still unsure about my intentions, so I needed to make them clear. Reaching up, I cupped his face gently, brushing my lips over his.

“Yes, I’m sure. I’m home. The only time I’m going back to Caroline’s is to pack my stuff to bring it back here, where it belongs. Where
I
belong.

“I love you,” I continued. “I never stopped loving you or needing you. And right now I need you like never before. I need to feel you inside me. Please.”

Cam’s eyes filled at my words and spilled over with his tears, and his lips came back down to mine. The kiss was gentle yet forceful, but soon became demanding and hot as hell, and Cam rutted his hips against mine yet again.

“God, Cam, get inside me before I explode.”

Cam reached over to the nightstand, and as he pulled out the lube, he froze.

“I don’t have any condoms,” he whispered. He dipped his head and wouldn’t meet my gaze.

My heart thumped once, twice. “Do we need them?”

Cam’s breath hitched. “No,
no
, babe. I promise I haven’t been with anyone else. Please believe me.”

I grinned wickedly at him, trying to ease his fears once more. “Then we don’t need them. Come here.” I pulled him down on top of me again. “Make love to me, Romeo.”