One Foot in the Grave: An Almost Zombie Tale (26 page)

Andrew takes a deep breath. “It’s not my fault. There’s no reason on earth why you should murder me. I’m not hurting anyone.”

Mikeal nods. “That is true. But the bounty has always existed. Again, I ask you. What makes you so special?”

“Not a darn thing,” Andrew says. “But doing something just because it’s always been done isn’t the right decision. Take slavery, for example.”

“I owned slaves,” Mikeal states. “I did set them free when I could, though.”

“Because you knew it was wrong.” Andrew sounds confident.

“Because my wife demanded it,” Mikeal corrects. “But she is not speaking on your behalf tonight.”

“I will owe you a favor,” Nacelles says. “You know my power and know my favors don’t come cheap.”

The older vampire leans back in his chair and steeples his fingers together.

Kalliope walks around the table to where I’m sitting and takes the seat next to me. Great; I’ll likely be reciting poetry in my head all night.

“You are an interesting creature,” she says.

I laugh, because I’m kind of thinking the same thing about her. I want to ask her where she’s from, but can’t figure out how to without sounding rude. Or reciting a string of poetry a mile long. Either way, I think I’ve had enough of “foot –in-mouth” disease for tonight. My stomach growls and I close my eyes for an instant and breathe deep. It smells good.

“We do not stand on formality here,” the siren says. She pours a dab of A1 onto her plate, next to two pork chops.

Huh. “I would’ve thought you’d eat fish.”

“I am not a mermaid,” Kalliope states. “I do not consume fish.”

I glance over at her son, who has a sushi roll in each hand. “But your son does…”

She nods. “Yes. Stephen loves fish.” Her cute little nose wrinkles and the scales on her face sparkle like champagne bubbles in a tall glass. Kalliope looks at my plate. “Do you eat what your parents do?”

Now that’s just not a fair question. “I did…before Andrew turned me.”

Mikeal’s head swivels in our direction. “
Andrew
turned you?” He’s shocked. “Nacelles, that changes everything.”

“Does that mean you’re unwilling to remove the bounty?” The lich asks.

The vampire takes a sip from his goblet. “I will lift his bounty immediately.” He points at me. “But only if you agree to come back.”

“What? Why do I need to come back?” I ask.

“You intrigue me,” Mikeal says. “Do you have any idea how long it has been since someone fascinated me?”

I’m not sure whether I like that or not. It feels like I’m a small penguin staring down the gullet of a large polar bear. “So if I say ‘no’, then Andrew will die?”

He nods.

“Well, that’s not fair,” I blurt out.

The vampire that’s not Andrew laughs. “You are quite young. Even you must learn that life is not fair.”

“Please, Isis,” Andrew pleads. “Just say yes.”

I bite my lip, weighing my newly admitted feelings for my ex to the idea of being at the Master Vampire’s beck and call. “I’ll do it.”

Andrew smiles. “Thanks, Isis. It’s not that I’m not grateful for the reprieve, but why are you willing to remove the bounty at all?”

“You are the zombie’s father,” Mikeal says.

I drop my spoon and brains spatter across the floor. “What?”

Andrew waggles his eyebrows at me. “Isis, I am your father…”

Considering I’m seriously debating the possibilities of dating Andrew again, I’m supremely unamused. “What the…heck…are you talking about? How can Andrew be my father?”

“He created you,” Kalliope says, her voice low velvet.

“And it’s not cool to kill parents,” Mikeal’s kid chimes in, around a mouthful of sushi.

This conversation is so weird I feel like I should’ve taken a swig of NyQuil before I came, just so I could understand it. “So does that mean Andrew’s—father,” I stumble over the word, “is still alive? I mean, undead? Errr…a vampire?”

“He was laid to rest for his transgressions.” The Master Vampire’s tone doesn’t invite further questions.

I bite my lip. Yikes. I guess this whole ‘turned by accident’ thing is pretty serious.

Kalliope lays a hand over my spoonless one. “Do not concern yourself,” she says. “It is a rare thing Andrew has done in turning you into what you are. My husband will ensure his safety.”

The rest of dinner is uneventful. Kalliope fills it with small talk, which keeps everyone enthralled and me reciting silent poetry. Finally, Nacelles pushes away from the table. “It’s almost daylight, Andrew. If we leave now, we’ll have just enough time to make it back to the cemetery.”

“You live in a cemetery?” Mikeal asks. “Please tell me you do not sleep in a coffin. Stereotypes are so overdone.”

I laugh.

“He’s staying at Father Moss’ sanctuary,” Nacelles says. “Until other quarters become available, of course.”

“Of course,” Mikeal agrees. “He will have to assimilate.”

That sounds super Borg-ish. “Is resistance futile?” Sometimes I can’t help myself.

Both vampires tilt their heads to one side, thinking. Well...I guess neither of them are Star Trek fans.

The lich stifles a smile. I guess he is.

“Thanks for the brains,” I say. “I mean, they were good.”

Kalliope stops me as I’m getting up. “Isis, if you ever want to talk, you can call me.” She smiles. “I know what it is like to navigate a world that is no longer yours.”

“Thanks.” I don’t know what else to say so I just stand by my chair and shift my feet.

Andrew takes another gulp from his goblet before getting to his feet. I’m relieved to notice that his color is looking better and his hair is back to its lustrous self.

“I’m not sure what to say,” he starts, but Mikeal stops him with one raised hand.

“Ink will help you adjust to your circumstances. Do not turn anyone. Am I clear?”

Andrew swallows. “I wouldn’t dream of it. Sir.”

“You will,” the Master Vampire corrects. “We all do. Just do not do it, or you will be laid to rest beside your father.”

And that pretty much takes care of everything. We say our goodbyes and pile back into Nacelles’ hearse. Traffic is almost non-existent. I close my eyes and cat-nap for the entire ride back to Marietta. I don’t even realize where I am until the lich shakes my shoulder to wake me up.

“Isis, we’re here. Wake up.”

“Here where?” I mumble.

“We’re at your apartment building. Go inside, Isis. Get sleep.” His voice is gentle and about lulls me back into dreamland.

A light mist begins to coat my skin. My eyes snap open. It’s raining. Inside the hearse. Wow. That’s just not right. Now I’m awake.

“Alright, fine, I’m up. Stop the rain already.”

“It’s mist,” the lich corrects, but the dew eases up.

“Where’s Andrew?” I rub my eyes.

“At the church, where I left him. You slept through it.”

I clamber out of the back seat and lean back through the open window. “Thanks for the ride, Nacelles.”

“You’re welcome, Isis. Goodnight.”

‘Night’ seems kind of a misnomer considering streaks of light are beginning to coat the sky, but okay. “G’night.”

I watch the hearse pull away from the curb, then walk inside the building. Bed’s never sounded so good. I hope my mom’s asleep. I really don’t want to have another conversation. Not until I talk to Andrew about some stuff.

Forty-Four:

A Life by Any Other Name...

I’m so tired I feel like I can sleep for days. And I pretty much do. I crawl into bed and leave it long enough to eat, then crawl right back in again. My mom’s come in a couple of times to check on me, but other than that, she’s pretty much left me alone. For which I’m intensely grateful.

The phone rings. I answer it. “Wha?”

“It’s Friday, Isis.” It’s Father Moss on the phone. I wonder how he can hold the receiver.

“Ummm…Okay.” Maybe my brain is misfiring due to fatigue, but I have no idea what’s so special about Fridays, other than being the start of the weekend.

“It’s movie night,” the gargoyle elaborates. “You
are
planning on coming, aren’t you?”

“Sure, all right,” I mumble, only half paying attention. I drop the phone back onto its receiver and close my eyes again.

This time it’s the persistent knocking at my apartment door that does the trick and forces me out of bed. I glance at the window on my way to the door. It’s dark. Crap, I slept the entire day away.

I peer through the spyhole in the door and my breath catches. It’s Andrew. What’s he doing here?

He knocks again. “Come on, Isis, open up. I know you’re there.”

This is not who I want to be dealing with dressed in pajamas. “I—uhhh-I can’t open the door, Andrew. What’re you doing here?”

“Father Moss sent us,” my erstwhile boyfriend says.

I crack the door open. “Who is ‘us’?”

“Him and I,” Ink flows out of the darkness of the hallway.

I smile. I like the vampire…and if she’s there, I can focus on her and not on my feelings for Andrew. I can deal with that. “Okay, come in and give me a few. I’ve got to get dressed.” One of these days, I’ll ask Ink if the whole thing about vampires having to be invited in is real or not. But not tonight. I leave them in the living room and shut the bedroom door behind me. It doesn’t take long to get dressed and rejoin them.

“So what’s the movie?” I shut the apartment door behind me and lock it.

“Newbie’s choice,” Ink replies.

“Have you been to one of these things before?” We follow Andrew to the elevator and it opens immediately.

“Yes, even though I’m not one of you, Father Moss allows it.” She smiles at me, her fangs long and sharp.

I nod and even manage to conjure up a smile when Andrew glances my way. He looks phenomenal. Eating regularly definitely agrees with him.

The cab waiting for us is, of course, an Angel cab. What a shocker. We all slide into the backseat, Ink sitting in the middle to keep Andrew and I separated.

“I’m Ezriel,” the cabbie says. “Sit back, relax and enjoy the ride. It shouldn’t take me long to get you to the church. Traffic’s usually pretty light at this time of night.”

I take him at his word. I’m still bone tired, and don’t have a clue why. Maybe it’s just the exhaustion of dealing with everything. After all, since Andrew turned me I haven’t had much of a chance to just be. I let out a breath, close my eyes, and feel my shoulders relax.

The taxi slows and I open my eyes. Wow. That was fast. Maybe the cab has some angel power or something I don’t know about. It’s not likely, but I giggle at the thought and Ezriel glances at me in the rearview mirror. He winks. “We’re here. Enjoy!”

We pile out of the taxi and file into the church. Everyone’s crammed into the sanctuary. Even Maxx, who’s taken up a semi-permanent housing in one of the cemetery’s tombs, is there. I try not to think about it. I still want him to live with me, but I get why he opted for the church instead. There’s no way I could keep him a secret from the apartment manager. Honestly, I spend so much time here, I still see him a lot.

Someone’s lowered a huge white screen where the altar would be at a normal church, and there’s an array of DVDs spread out across the steps. Ink nudges me forward. “Go, choose.”

I smile. There’s only one movie I’m interested in…I just hope it’s one of the options in front of me.

Noelle grins at me when I hand her the DVD. “I knew there was a reason I kind of liked you.” She puts it in the player and pushes ‘play’. The opening scene is innocuous; a car driving up a dirt road, with a farmhouse in the background, all in black and white. Then the name of the movie appears and groans erupt from the pews.

“
That’s
the movie you pick?”

Popcorn flies over my head. I laugh. Someone needs more practice throwing stuff.

“Really?”

“George Romero! That’s an awesome choice, Isis!” Much to my amazement, that last comment comes from Andrew, of all people. I smile and take a seat close to him. I’m not sure how he’ll take it, but it’s time to say something. I nudge him gently in the ribcage. He turns to face me.

“I miss you,” I murmur, knowing full well there are at least a handful of people who’ll be able to hear me over the opening credits.

His gorgeous blue eyes widen. “You do? I mean…you don’t hate me?”

I shake my head, finally realizing it’s completely true. I don’t hate him. Far from it, in fact.

He takes my hand in his and something finally ‘clicks’. Everything’s starting to make sense. I look around. I’ve got a bunch of supernatural half-breeds as friends. I’ve also got a lot on my plate; Ra’kul, visiting the Master Vampire so my not so ex-boyfriend doesn’t die, keeping the peace with Noelle, and everything else. But I’ve also got a mom who accepts me unconditionally and ‘Night of the Living Dead’ playing on a big screen in a church sanctuary. It’s not anything close to normal, but that’s okay. If there’s one thing I’m learning to accept, it’s that my undead life may be super weird and kind of quirky, but it’s a lot more interesting than the life I had when I was completely human. I’m not seeing a problem with that.

***

About the Author:

Shanti Krishnamurty lives in Atlanta, Georgia with her husband, two sons and dogs of the gigantic variety.

When she’s not busy playing MMORPGs, she attends college online; home educates her children and writes constantly.

She is normally found online via Facebook

www.facebook.com/shanti.krishnamurty
,

posting about writing or life in general.

She can also be emailed at

[email protected]