My Only - Alex & Jamie (9 page)

What in the world had come over her?! She was not some sex-crazed hoochie. But around Alex it was like her brain thought she was living in a porno.

“So, how long have you been in town?” He casually asked.

“A couple of weeks,” she answered and turned her head to look out the window, thinking maybe she could stop her X-rated imagination if she just wasn’t looking directly at him.

“Do you like it so far?”

“I do.” She nodded, still gazing out the window.

“Something interesting out there that I can’t see?” he asked, his voice sounding slightly amused.

Busted!

Jamie turned back to him, “Oh, no nothing. Sorry I was just…I…was…”

“It’s okay if I’m boring you, you can just say so,” he said with a gleam in his eye.

She took a deep breath, trying to steady her nerves, and felt her mouth turn up in a grin. “You’re not boring.”

He winked at her. “Just too ugly to look at.”

“Yep, pretty much.” She nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, I get that all the time.” He shrugged as he finished his roll of bread.

She laughed, “I bet you do.”

Great, this was just great! He was funny, a firefighter, an ex-Navy SEAL, and he looked…how he looked. God, she was in so much trouble.

“So you’re a nurse and you also work over at The Grill,” he said.

He waited, just staring at her. She felt his gaze all the way down to her toes. The intensity of it was palpable.

“Was that a statement or a question?” she asked, trying to distract herself from the arousal his stare was causing to swirl inside of her.

“That was a statement. My question is, why?”

“Why what?” She really needed to figure out how to follow along in the conversation and look into his tropical green eyes at the same time. It kind of felt like patting your head and rubbing your belly. It was so much easier to do one without simultaneously doing the other.

“Why two jobs?”

Just focus on the questions, she told herself.

“Student loans.”

“Do you like nursing?” he asked as he picked at his dinner.

“I do, I love it,” she answered honestly.

“Do you like waitressing?”

“I like the money-to-time ratio; it’s a good paying part-time job when you count tips.” She normally didn’t like answering questions about herself. She had always been a private person. She kept waiting for that protective instinct she had always had to kick in, telling her not to trust him, to keep him at arm's-length. But it wasn’t. With Alex, she felt…safe.

“Where are you from?” he continued.

“Chicago.”

“Do you still have family there?”

“No.” She saw by the look in his eye that he thought she was intentionally trying to be coy by not elaborating on her short, to-the-point answers. But that honestly wasn’t the case. Even if she wanted to open up to him – which oddly enough, she did – she would have no clue where to even start.

“Are you single?” His crystal-clear emerald green eyes locked on hers.

She felt a tingle of excitement in her belly. She wished that she could act on it. But since she couldn’t, it was probably best to re-direct the conversation.

“Yes. Now can I ask you something?”

“Anything,” he answered.

“Why aren’t you taking the Morphine?” She knew the amount of pain he must be in and how much more comfortable he would be if he would just take the medication.

“I don’t like how it makes me feel.”

“Which is how? In less pain?” she asked, not really understanding his reasoning.

“No, like I’m in a fog.”

“Oh.” She understood that, but still it seemed like a small price to pay to get some relief from the extreme discomfort his injuries must be causing him.

“I need to be in control,” he continued, a new huskiness to his tone.

The words he spoke caused a delicious shiver to shoot down her spine. She felt the hairs at the nape of her neck stand up. Her breathing grew shallow. She nervously pulled her bottom lip between her teeth.

Alex’s eyes flooded with a predatory lust as he quietly growled, “Jamie.”

She felt a heavy vibration in her hip. At first she thought it was just one more physical reaction to this heated exchange. But after a couple of seconds she realized it was her phone vibrating.

Pulling it from her pocket she apologized, “Sorry, I need to check this.”

Normally, she turned her phone off when she was at work, but Joey hadn’t been feeling well this morning so she decided to keep it on vibrate. When she read the text, relief flooded her, as well as a small amount of embarrassment. She quickly cleared the screen and put it back in her pocket.

“Everything okay?” He asked.

“Yep.” She nodded.

Her phone buzzed a second time. She ignored it.

“Do you need to check that?”

“Nope.” She shook her head.

It vibrated again. She sighed.

He stared silently, lifting one eyebrow.

“It’s my aunt,” she explained, rolling her eyes.

“Does she need something?”

“No,” Jamie quickly answered. She felt her cheeks flush and she hoped he had not noticed her reaction.

A small smile played at his lips.

A buzz sounded indicating she had received yet another text. Oh, Jiminy Cricket! She needed to nip this in the bud, pronto.

“Sorry,” she mumbled as she retrieved her phone and began typing. Before she had even had a chance to press send on her response she was alerted that one more text had come through.

“Are you sure she doesn’t need something?”

“Yes. I love my Aunt Hazel, but she drives me crazy sometimes.” Jamie tried to temper her frustration.

“Hazel from Gerard’s Diner?” he asked.

“Yep,” she confirmed.

He chuckled, “Now you have to tell me what she said.”

“You don’t want to know, I promise.” Jamie continued looking down as she tried to complete her text letting Hazel know that since she was at work to please only contact her if it was an emergency.

“Oh come on, I know it’s got to be good. Pretty please,” Alex jokingly pleaded.

She looked up and saw his head tilted in a charmingly disarming way.

“Oh, fine,” she sighed in resignation. She shook her head, not really believing she was about to tell him what her aunt had requested, “She wants a ‘hiney’ shot.”

His eyes widened, “A what?”

“She said, and I quote, 'When he heads to the bathroom, get a hiney shot.' End quote.” She had to laugh a little as she heard the words out loud.

“Why, does she think I’m going commando under here?”

“Oh, I don’t…think…I don’t think…” Her heart rate sped up as she tried to answer him.

He laughed, seemingly enjoying her stuttering response.

“I’m so glad I can entertain you.” She grinned as she placed her phone back in her pocket.

“You have no idea how much you do.” His tone grew serious. “Let me take you out to dinner, when I get out of here, to return the favor.”

The door opened and Dr. Corbin came in. Jamie practically jumped out of her seat. The white-haired, bespectacled, physician was the Chief of Staff, and had worked at the hospital since the mid-sixties. Gah! If there was anyone on staff she didn't want to look unprofessional in front of it was Dr. Corbin.

She stepped to the side of the room while he examined Alex. After the doctor was finished, they chatted for a few minutes, mostly about baseball. Dr. Corbin was apparently a Cubs fan and Alex was a White Sox fan.

Oookaaay...so now she knew that, not only was Alex funny, a firefighter, an ex-Navy
SEAL, and he looked…well, how he looked...he was also a Sox fan! She was seriously beginning to think that he was, in fact, the perfect man.

Luckily, she knew two things to be absolutely true. One, the ‘perfect man’ did not exist. She was sure if he did her mom would have found him. If it was a numbers game, she would have had to. And two, if something seemed ‘too good to be true’ it was generally because it was.

Logically, she knew that. Her mind was crystal-clear on both of those points. It was her heart and hormones that seemed to have their own take on things. Oh, well, since her body and emotions did not seem to be on board, she decided that she would just ignore them. If she wasn’t on speaking terms with them, then they didn’t get to have a say in her actions. Right?

--- ~ ---

“So how does next Friday sound?” Alex asked as soon as Dr. Corbin left the room.

“Excuse me?” Jamie asked, still standing against the wall she had scurried over to as soon as the doctor had come in.

“Our date. How about next Friday?”

“I can’t,” she quickly stated, her voice now briskly business-like.

“Okay, Saturday then,” he countered.

“No, it’s not the day. It’s just...I can’t. I mean...I don’t date,” she said by way of explanation.

“You don’t date?” Alex asked, not having any idea how to process that information.

“I don’t date,” Jamie confirmed. Her body language was tense, her tone formal.

Alex realized then that, in the few minutes that they had been interrupted by Dr. Corbin, Jamie’s entire demeanor had changed. It was as if she had put a very high, very secure wall up with a large ‘Do Not Enter’ sign hanging from it. She looked serious and a little sad.

He needed to lighten the mood.

“No dates, huh? Not even with your fiancé?”

He saw her lips twitch as if she was fighting with a smile that was threatening to appear on her gorgeous face. Her watch beeped and she stepped away from the wall she had been holding up.

“I need to change your bandages.” She walked to the far side of the room and opened several drawers, collecting everything she would need to change his dressing.

She stepped close to the left side of his bed, releasing the side rail. She paused and looked down at him, probably waiting for him to lean forward.

“Hi,” Alex said, taking a moment to appreciate her beauty. Because, God, she was so beautiful.

“Hi,” she said, in a near-whisper.

He watched as her chest rose and fell. Her eyes dilated slightly and her lips parted just the tiniest little alluring bit.

Obviously her non-dating status didn’t have anything to do with whether or not she was attracted to him. She was displaying physical evidence that she was. And even though he had only spent probably an hour with her total (that he remembered) he didn’t get the feeling that she was particularly damaged emotionally. He just didn’t get it.

Jamie seemed bright, funny, caring, and she was interested in him. Even if she didn’t want to admit it, he knew she was.

“I need you to lean forward,” she said, her voice sounding a little shaky.

He did as she asked, and as she was working, he closed his eyes so that he could simply focus on the sounds of her breathing, her touch on his back, the tickle of her soft hair as it fell against his shoulder.

He took in a deep breath and she smelled so good that he moaned.

She immediately stopped what she was doing, “Did I hurt you?”

“No you didn’t.” He wanted to tell her why he had involuntarily made that sound. She just smelled so damn good that his body had automatically responded. But he didn’t want to scare her off, so he remained silent.

“
OKAY, well, tell me if I do.” She didn’t sound convinced that she hadn’t caused him pain. He could feel the hesitation in her touch as she continued.

Jamie’s fingers grazed his neck as she tied up his gown.

“All done.” She moved away as she disposed of the old dressing.

“Jamie?” He hadn’t meant for her name to come out as a question, but he knew why it had.

Even though he knew it to be true he wanted to know for sure, to hear her say, that she felt what was happening between them too.

“What?” She turned around, and he saw it then in her golden brown eyes. The vulnerability, the confusion, the uncertainty.

He knew that, for whatever reason, she wasn’t ready to face this. Whatever this was. He didn’t want to pressure her or push her out of her comfort zone. He had never been a particularly patient man. In the past, when he had wanted something, he didn’t stop until he got it.

But Jamie was different. He wanted to know her, and he wanted to do it on her terms.

So instead of asking her what he really wanted to, he simply asked, “Do you know how to play poker?”

She exhaled as her shoulders relaxed and a genuine, happy smile crossed her face. She nodded her head as she crossed the room, “There’s a deck of cards at the nurse's station. I’ll go grab them.”

As she reached the door to go and retrieve the cards she turned and glanced back over her shoulder. Her eyes were filled with emotion.

“Thank you,” she said softly before quickly exiting the room.