Jaded (The Butterfly Memoirs) (32 page)

“What’s his name?”

“Zachariah Givens, but he also goes by Zack…oh God, is he okay? Where is he?” I started to get up again, but the officer encouraged me to stay put.

“Let me see what I can find out.” He stepped away and faced the direction of the accident scene.

I could hear him talking over the radio and the response from the officers closest to the scene.

This could not be happening. That was Zack’s car. I knew it without a doubt. The more I studied it, the more the little details were clear as day. There were the remnants of the words ‘Happy Honeymoon’ still in the rear window. We had a hard time getting the marker used by Nick to wash off once we returned home.

Why was this happening? Why did it seem like every time happiness came into my life it ended in some form of disaster?

We were meant to be together; we complimented each other. Maybe that was the problem; things were too good between us. It seemed as if the moment we acknowledged our feelings, the universe cursed us. His mother revealed she was dying; I screwed things up by keeping it from him, filed for divorce, and now this.

Zack could be alive or dead.

I dropped my head to my chest and cried. I couldn’t live without him, even if we were divorced. Knowing he no longer walked this earth would kill me.

“Please let him be okay, please let him be okay…,” I prayed.

“Mrs. Givens, it seems the paramedics have taken your husband to the hospital.”

“Oh God, is he alive?”

“I’m sorry, ma’am, that information wasn’t relayed to me.”

I climbed behind my wheel and the officer shut the door.

“If you hold on a minute, I’ll clear traffic and escort you there.”

I nodded my thanks and gripped the wheel.

***

Ten minutes later, I parked, jumped out of my car, and ran into the emergency room. I ignored the sign instructing patients to take a number and ran straight for the desk.

“My name is Yasmine Givens. My husband, Zachariah Givens, was brought here in an ambulance. He was in an accident. I need to see him.”

The ER nurse scrutinized me, irritation etched in her face. “Miss, I need you to take a number and be seated.”

“Excuse me?” I snapped. “I’m not here to be seen, I’m looking for my husband.”

She sighed and tapped keys. “What was his name?”

Was? That was a phrase I didn’t want to hear. “His name is Zachariah Givens.”

After what felt like forever, she replied. “He’s holding in the ER.”

“He’s alive?”

She shrugged.

“I need to see him.”

“You’ll have to take a seat while I notify the doctor you’re here. Someone will come for you in a few minutes.”

She dismissed me and punched numbers in the phone. I stepped out of the way of the people in line and stood near the locked door leading into the ER rooms. Ten minutes passed and no one came to meet me. The moment the door opened for a nurse to call a patient, I slipped past her and proceeded toward the patient rooms.

“Zack! Baby, it’s me! Where are you?”

I went room to room, searching, and did not see him anywhere. I was beyond my amount of control. I wouldn’t be calm again until I saw Zack lying in a hospital bed breathing on his own. Only then would I be calm.

It didn’t take long for the nurse to catch up with me.

“Miss, I need you to stop what you’re doing and come with me. You’re disrupting the patients.”

I didn’t care. I brushed her hand off and continued to call for my husband.

“Zack!”

“Ma’am, I need you to come with me.”

I peered over my shoulder and saw a security guard. It was time to speed up my search.

I ran.

Chapter 43

The pain medication the doctor gave me hadn’t kicked in. My head ached, so did every other part of my body. My broken foot was beyond painful.

I groaned, not from the pain, but because of what happened.

I didn’t give a damn about my car or anything in it. I was pissed because I didn’t make it to see Yasmine. Too much time had passed since the last time we spoke for me to take too long to respond to the divorce papers. Not contacting her immediately decreased my chances of making up with her.

Why didn’t I call from work? We could have scheduled a time to meet or talked on the phone.

Instead, I was in the hospital, banged up and bloody, with no one to miss me.

When the police asked for next of kin information, the only name I could list was Nick. I wanted to give Yasmine’s name, but after two months since we last spoke, it was possible she wouldn’t care.

That hurt more than my broken ankle.

For the fifth time in my life, I wished I had a time machine. If I could choose one point in time to return and change the outcome of my decisions, it would be the day I walked out on my marriage. Losing my mother and father were due to circumstances beyond my control. Leaving her was on me.

If I had taken a moment to listen to what she had to say, whether I liked it or not, we could have worked it out. In the large scheme of things keeping that information to herself was not the end of the world. Her only fault was the fact she loved me enough to try and protect me.

And in the end, I still pushed her away.

I sighed. How long had I been here? I had lost consciousness several times from the pain alone. I was in too much pain to lift my head to see if a clock was in the room, and my watch was no longer on my wrist. My cell phone was gone, probably broken. I had no doubt it was past five o’clock. Yasmine would be off of work by now.

I had her number memorized. I could use the hospital phone and call her, but then I’d have to tell her what happened and where I was. She’d probably come and sit with me, but it would, more than likely, be out of pity instead of love. I didn’t want that. I wanted to face my wife as the man she married, the one she needed me to be.

It would be the only way to get her back.

I forced my hurt arm over to my hip to reach into my pants pocket.

I was no longer wearing pants. Her wedding ring was in my pocket.

“Nurse!” I forced my aching arm over to the buzzer on the side of the bed and held the button down.

I was so out of it when the paramedics freed me from the car I didn’t think about anything except the fact I was alive. Then the pain hit and I blacked out.

It was standard protocol for paramedics and hospital staff to cut free clothing in order to get to your body. Someone was supposed to remove valuables like your ID and money and store it until you were admitted to, or released from the hospital.

Sometimes things got lost.

I didn’t give a damn about credit cards, money, or my ID. All of those things were replaceable. But not my mother’s ring. It was the connection to my mother. It was the key to saving my marriage.

“Nurse! Anybody!” I hit the call button again.

“Can I help you?” A tiny voice came through the speaker attached to my bed.

Finally, a response. “Yes, I need to see a nurse.”

“Is this an emergency?”

I gritted my teeth in aggravation. “No.”

“Sir, we have a situation to get under control before I can send someone to assist you.”

A situation? I strained to hear what was going on. Some woman was yelling. What she said was hard to understand, probably because of all the medication I was on had kicked in. But it was definitely a woman’s voice followed by the yells of several men.

Impatient, I hit the call button again. This time there was no answer. Someone needed to restrain the crazy woman and give her some medication so the nurses could return to doing their job.

“Zack! It’s me, where are you?”

I froze. Maybe I was starting to hallucinate…

Was that…Yasmine?

I pushed up as far as I could in the bed and ignored the pain. Then I heard it again, sweet and angelic…

“Zachariah Givens!”

“Miss, do not go in there!”

“Zack! Where are… Get your hands off of me! I need to find my husband!”

And extremely pissed.

“Yasmine! I’m here!” My throat dry, I coughed. “Yasmine!”

“Zack, oh baby, I’m here!” Seconds later the love of my life pushed her way past the curtain closing my bed off from the hallway. Tears streamed down her cheeks. She never looked more beautiful.

“Yasmine, how did you find me?” I reached for her with the one arm that wasn’t immobilized by IV’s.

“Oh, baby, are you okay?” Her voice shook as she ran her hands over my body.

“Ow,” I groaned when she reached my rib cage. “I’m okay; I’m okay, just a broken foot. Yasmine, baby, look at me.”

She stopped fussing over me as I grasped her hands in mine. Her eyes were red. My heart ached. How many times had I made her cry? I couldn’t keep doing this to her. Not now, not ever again.

“Miss, you need to come with us.” A security guard stepped around the curtain, one hand on his gun.

“No, officer, please, this is my wife. I’m sorry, let her stay.”

The officer realized she’d calmed, though he did not appear pleased for having to chase her. “Keep her here. If she comes out yelling again she will be escorted out of the hospital.”

I nodded and waited for him to leave. My attention focused on my wife and the worry that was apparent on her face. Even now she was as beautiful as I could remember. How did I let myself walk away from her?

“Yasmine, how did you find me?”

“I saw the accident and recognized your car. I made the police tell me where you were.”

“Wait a minute, you saw my car?”

She sniffed. “I was on my way home from work and got stuck in traffic. I saw your laptop bag on the ground when I got close to the accident and recognized your car. Thank God you’re alive!” She slipped free of my hands and leaned in to wrap her arms around me. It was impossible to do since I lay in a hospital bed, but she made it work.

I sighed when my nose reached the crease of her neck. Her scent flooded me and brought instant peace. It was hard to hold her with both arms, but man, did I hold her tight.

“I was on my way to see you,” I murmured in her hair.

Yasmine wiped her tears. “You were coming to see me?”

I slid a finger along her jaw and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. “Yes. I got the divorce papers today        and —”

Fresh tears fell as her head dropped.

“Don’t cry, baby, it’s not your fault, it’s mine. I shouldn’t have let things get to the point you felt I didn’t want you. I want you, Yasmine. I’ve always wanted you. I was angry, but I need you. Both of you were right about that. I’m lost without you.”

She ran a hand over watering eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I wanted to the day you came to see me, but before I could, you gave back the ring. Next thing I know you were talking divorce and…I didn’t know what to say. I figured if you wanted this to end, there was nothing I could say or do to make you stay. But the truth is you need me as much as I need you.” My gaze left hers and settled on her stomach. I forced the hand being pumped full of pain meds over to touch her stomach. “I don’t want our child to be raised in a split-parent home. I want to be there for both of you.”

Her lips found mine in a kiss that felt as good as the first time.

“I love you, Yasmine. Never forget that. I will always love you.”

“I never stopped loving you.”

“Damn,” I ground out, letting my head drop back against the bed.

“What’s wrong? Are you okay? Do you need more medicine?” She resumed checking me for damage.

“No, it’s not that.” I reached for the call button. A nurse answered automatically.

In seconds she appeared by my bed. “Yes, sir. What can I do for you?”

“My pants, I need to get my pants. I had something very valuable in my pocket.”

Her eyes shifted between Yasmine and me as she smiled. “Sure, Mr. Givens, give me a moment.” She disappeared and when she returned, she handed me a white bag with the hospital name printed on the side. “Here are your personal effects found on you by the paramedics. Sorry about the clothes, but they had to be trashed.”

“Thanks,” I muttered, digging around in the bag. The minute my fingers hit the ring box, I grinned. Pain shot through my lip; I forgot that it had been cut. Kissing Yasmine had taken away the pain.

Yasmine gasped when she saw the velvet red box.

I reached for her hand. When she laid it in mine, I noticed a discoloration on her finger and studied it. “You got a tattoo on your ring finger?”

A small smile appeared on her lips. “I did it the day I gave you the ring. It’s like a tattooed wedding band. I had no plans to marry anyone else. In my heart I would always be married to you.”

Her revelation humbled me. I lifted her hand to my mouth and kissed the jade butterfly. “Will you do me the honor of being my wife again?” I tugged the ring out of the box. “It still belongs to you, just like my heart.”

“I will never take it off again.”

I slipped the ring on her finger and stared at it. It had found its home again.

“Where is your ring?” she asked.

“What?” For the first time I realized it was missing. “I never took it off.” Panic shot through me as I dug around the bag again and found it in a smaller plastic bag. Blood was on the band.

Yasmine reached for it and walked over to the small sink in the room. Water ran as she worked to clean it off. Satisfied, she returned and slid it to its resting place.

“I will always love and cherish you, Yasmine Givens.”

“Until death tears us apart,” she added. Then we kissed.

I no longer felt as if I were drowning. My love, my wife, had found its way home.

Epilogue

Two and half months later…

The day was long and tiring, but I had never been happier.

Dreams
was a huge success at all of the
Phillips’ Family Inns
and I was in the process of hiring help. Kaitlyn assisted when she could, but since she was due to give birth soon, she needed to spend as much time off of her feet as possible.

Not to mention she had plenty of other things going on in her life right now.