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Authors: Dorian Solot,Marshall Miller

Tags: #Self-Help, #General, #Sexual Instruction

I Love Female Orgasm: An Extraordinary Orgasm Guide (27 page)

BOOK: I Love Female Orgasm: An Extraordinary Orgasm Guide
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Vibes aren’t for women only: guys play with vibrators, too, and there are vibrating toys specifically sold for men.

Vibrators have a surprisingly long history. As Rachel Mains documents in her fascinating book
The Technology of Orgasm,
from the 300s BC to the 1920s, doctors massaged women’s genitals to orgasm as an accepted medical treatment for “hysteria.” When a physician invented an electromechanical vibrator in the 1880s, the medical field was thrilled—finally, a faster, more reliable way to treat the “female troubles” that were then among the most frequently-diagnosed diseases. Vibratory “gynecological massage” allowed doctors to treat more patients per day, with less fatigue for the doctor and less skill required. (As many husbands and partners can attest, bringing a woman to orgasm using one’s hands can sometimes be a slow and challenging process.) Offering treatment with vibrators was a major medical moneymaker for docs who offered it, since, as Mains writes, “These patients neither recovered nor died of their condition but continued to require regular treatment.” You, too, might develop a case of hysteria that required the attention of a physician if the only place you could come by an orgasm were at the doctor’s office!

Vibrators were among the first few electrical appliances available to the general public, appearing soon after toasters and nearly a decade before vacuum
cleaners and electric irons. By 1900, they were marketed openly to women for home use. Newspaper advertisements and mail-order catalogs promised women the devices would offer “thrilling, refreshing vibration” and help female buyers “realize thoroughly the joy of living.”

This listing from a 1918 sears, Roebuck and Company catalog advertises vibrators right under neath the sewing machines.

By the 1920s, though, vibrators began to appear in the pornographic films of the time, sullying their previously healthy, innocent reputation. The advertisements vanished from public view until the 1960s, when they were marketed more openly as sex toys.

Today, we sometimes hear people say they don’t want to use a vibrator (or they don’t want their partners to use one) because vibrators aren’t “natural.” Indeed, air conditioning, hot showers, cell phones, and underwear don’t occur in nature, either—but they sure improve people’s lives. Also, vibrators don’t just jump up and start stimulating people by themselves—there’s always a human being behind the vibrator finding the right spot and directing each stroke. (Of course, whether or not to try a vibrator is up to each person to decide—they don’t appeal to everybody.)

getting your hands on a vibe

CURIOUS? READY TO give it a whirl—or should we say, a buzz? Thousands of “adult stores” around the country sell vibrators, though you’re particularly in luck if you live in or near a city with a woman-friendly sex toy boutique such as:

Baltimore, MD

Sugar

Berkeley, CA

Good Vibrations

Boston, MA

Good Vibrations

Chicago, IL

Early to Bed, Tulip

Denver, CO

Hysteria

Halifax, Canada

Venus Envy

Madison, WI

A Woman’s Touch

Milwaukee, WI

A Woman’s Touch, The Tool Shed

Minneapolis, MN

The Smitten Kitten

New York, NY

Eve’s Garden, Toys in Babeland

Northampton, MA

Oh My!

Ottawa, Canada

Venus Envy

Portland, ME

Nomia Boutique

Portland, OR

It’s My Pleasure

Provincetown, MA

Wild Hearts

San Francisco, CA

Good Vibrations

Seattle, WA

Toys in Babeland

Toronto, Canada

Come as You Are, Good for Her

Vancouver, Canada

Womyns’ Ware

This is the instruction sheet that comes inside the box if you purchase the Hitachi Magic Wand “massager,” one of the top-selling vibrators on the market. The folks at Hitachi helpfully suggest many body parts where buyers might want a massage. Except, it looks like they forgot one or two. . . .

This list is definitely
not
all-inclusive. New stores pop up every year, and there are now so many great ones out there that it’s hard to keep track of them all. These stores pride themselves on being welcoming to women and GLBT people (as well as to men and straight people), and on stocking high-quality merchandise. The stores listed above and others like them are typically staffed by knowledgeable women who answer questions and offer candid advice without embarrassment.

If you’re not near one of these boutiques, nearly all offer online shopping (and in some cases, mail-order catalogs, too), and send products in packages that don’t suggest what’s inside. You can also buy a vibrator at a sex toy party, or get the “back massager” kind in a drug store or department store (just don’t expect to find the word “vibrator” on the outside of the box!).

vibrators on tv: Sex
and the City
IN A NOW-CLASSIC episode of
Sex and the City,
Samantha tries to return her broken vibrator to the Sharper Image store where she bought it, but the salesman insists, “Sharper Image doesn’t sell vibrators. It’s a neck massager.” Finally accepting his name for it, Samantha says, “I’d like to return my
neck massager.” When
the salesman asks her why, she says, “It failed to get me off.”

Some factors to consider when buying a vibe:

 

Shape
Because vibrators are used primarily for clitoral stimulation, you don’t need something shaped like a penis–unless you want to use it for penetration, as well.
Power
If you don’t want to worry about having the batteries die at a crucial moment, you might want a plug-in model. Vibrators that plug into a wall outlet generally provide more intense vibration than battery-operated ones. On the other hand, battery-operated devices can be gentler and can be used anywhere. There are also vibrators that charge like a cordless phone, ones that plug into your computer’s USB port (talk about multitasking!), and even solar-powered ones.
Price
In general, battery-operated vibrators are less expensive, but they also break more easily. It’s fine to start out with a battery-operated vibe; you can invest in a fancier model once you know you like the vibrations.
Sound
If your housemate sleeps in the room next door or your dorm room has paper-thin walls, you may want to be sure your vibrator is the strong, silent type. If there’s no one to hear your vibe’s happy hum, then you have nothing to worry about!
Color and style
What looks like fun to you? A sparkling purple cylindrical smoothie? A vibrator shaped like a well-hung penis? A waterproof curved toy perfect for some rub-a-dub-dub G-spot play? Choose one that appeals. You can always diversify down the road.
I have a small vibrator with pearly beads on the side of it. It’s a pretty bubblegum pink color. My boyfriend and I refer to it as my pink boyfriend. I got it at the sex shop near campus just as a joke. It was probably the best ten bucks I ever spent.
I use a tiny black-and-pink lipstick-shaped vibrator. I wanted one because I wasn’t ready for intercourse, but I wanted to experiment to see what I would like.
Mine is blue and looks like an average-sized penis. It’s tilted a quarter of the way up to enable the G-spot to be stimulated. I bought it when I was out with some friends who already had one. I wanted to become more confident with sex. I use it before going out to prevent myself from doing something stupid. I also use it before a nap when I’m really stressed out and to get my mind off things that don’t allow me to relax and go to sleep.
I have a transparent hot pink basic vibrator. It was a gift, so I didn’t pick the color, but it amuses me to no end that it is pink. It makes me feel really girly and normally I’m not a super-girly girl. My mom gave it to me when I was home from college over Thanksgiving break my freshman year, along with a book about masturbation. She wanted to make sure that I was having a good time in college, I guess.
somebody tip off the energizer bunny
HAVING THE BATTERIES die at a pivotal moment is one of the biggest drawbacks to using a battery-operated vibrator. Perhaps women don’t need batteries that “keep going, and going, and going.” Imagine if the slogan instead marketed batteries to help us “keep coming, and coming, and coming.” We think the brand would be a smash hit.
here a vibrator, there a vibrator
AS ORGASM EDUCATORS, we never ask our audiences to turn off their cell phones. Instead, at the start of every talk, we recommend audience members set their phones to vibrate. But cell phones aren’t the only devices that vibrate. We’ve heard plenty of stories of women having orgasms—intentionally and by surprise–from:
The handle of Gillette’s Venus Vibrance battery-operated razor vibrates. Our advice: Just be careful which end you use for which activity.
• back massagers
• washing machines
BOOK: I Love Female Orgasm: An Extraordinary Orgasm Guide
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