How to Defeat Harmful Habits (Counseling Through the Bible Series) (55 page)
(J
AMES
5:12).
•
Don’t
shield your loved one from facing the consequences of addiction.
Instead, maintain your integrity.
– “I will not lie to your boss again.”
“A man reaps what he sows”
(G
ALATIANS
6:7).
•
Don’t
accept promises with no commitment
for immediate action. Instead, realize that words without actions are worthless.
– If the response is, “I can’t go now, but I promise to go next month,” your role as the boundary setter is to convey the repercussions for delay.
“A simple man believes anything, but a prudent man gives thought to his steps”
(P
ROVERBS
14:15).
To some, the idea of participating in a crisis intervention could seem like a conspiracy against the struggler. And other would-be participants could fear that they will offend or jeopardize the relationship with the struggler. Rather than viewing intervention as a conspiracy, however, think of it as a collaboration—a caring group of loving, committed supporters willing to temporarily forego the understanding and approval of a struggler in exchange for the possibility of a greater long-term good. Take heart in knowing that one day your struggler will most likely see your role of courageous compassion through God’s eyes, and thank you, realizing that “wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.”
4
A Few Words from Frank
As a recovery pastor, I’ve participated in many crisis interventions. One of the most memorable confrontations was conducted by the family of a very close friend.
“Steve” had become so consumed by his addiction that he no longer viewed his actions as right or wrong. He was able to rationalize and excuse almost any wrong behavior so long as it helped him meet his “needs.” And his greatest need was the next high.
As Steve’s heroin addiction mushroomed, so did his need to find ways to finance it. For years prior to the intervention, he had borrowed money, stolen possessions, cheated, and lied to virtually every family member, friend, and acquaintance he had. He told me later his motivation wasn’t as much about seeking pleasure as it was about numbing the pain. Yet the consequences of his actions were catastrophic.
At the despairing depth of his addiction, being sober was synonymous with experiencing extreme pain—the pain of withdrawal, failed relationships, financial crises, and hopelessness. Steve’s drug of choice had long since stopped providing any pleasure. Instead, it had become his only means of escaping his tortured existence.
Steve’s family conducted the intervention beautifully, with each participant compassionately pouring out love, concern, and a desire to be there for him throughout his recovery—should he choose that path. At first, Steve steadfastly resisted their strong show of support. He was desperately afraid of facing a sober life. His poor choices had created such a mountain of consequences that he had lost all hope for change. (It’s hard to communicate the confusing chasm we face at the end of our addiction. We cannot stand the thought of living one more day under its influence, but we are even more fearful of being deprived of its effect.)
Eventually Steve found the courage and motivation to enter rehab. Though he’s had a couple of slips along the way—quite common for those attempting to break free from addiction—he now has logged over a year of sobriety. I believe—as does Steve—that if it were not for the remarkable support of his loving family and their willingness to intervene on his behalf, Steve would not be alive today.
THE HEALING = WORLD OF REHAB
:
M
y friend Frank admitted that he couldn’t have conquered his decades of addiction had it not been for rehab. In a forthright manner, he reflected on the role of rehab in his recovery.
As someone who’s gone through rehab, I found that a residential setting away from my own home provided the
enforced break
from my addiction that I so desperately needed. The rehab experience gave me time to “come to my senses.”
Residential rehab may not be possible in every situation due to budget or unchangeable responsibilities, but for a long-term user like me, it was invaluable. I needed this type of structured program because on my own, I had tried—and failed—so many times. I just couldn’t muster the willpower to try again. I needed professional help—and a lot of it.
For me, a male-only program was important. Coed centers can have additional distractions that detract from one’s progress during treatment.
At the rehab center, I was offered the option of either a traditional track (a secular 12-step program) or a Christian track (which ties the 12 steps to Christian principles). Both options can be very effective depending on the individual. No matter the approach, I needed a fresh lens through which to view my problem.
After participating in a monthlong residential program, I moved to a transitional living environment known as a “sober living house.” This arrangement provided increased freedom while maintaining a high level of supervision and support. Most rehab centers offer this transitional option to patients because it helps you learn to live without being dependent.
As an alcoholic, I relied on chemicals for so long I had very little ability to cope with the daily stresses and strains that are a normal part of life. My chronic abuse, as a coping tool, short-circuited my emotional development. As a result, I needed as much time as possible to develop and recalibrate my emotional responses.
A residential rehab isn’t the only effective treatment method. A day care rehab program or intensive outpatient program (IOP) is another strong solution. These programs offer the same basic content as a residential treatment facility, but allow strugglers to maintain their jobs and return home at night. While it takes longer to receive the same amount of counseling, the end result is the same. Professional input is needed to help you decide whether this option is a good one for you.
Realize that a lack of knowledge or willpower rarely keeps a person from sobriety. Rather, it’s their unresolved issues (fear, resentment, guilt) that typically perpetuate the addiction. For this reason, if the day treatment option is chosen, it’s essential for strugglers to return each evening to a loving, supportive home environment.
I thank God for beginning my healing at rehab and I cannot overstate its importance in my life. For me, it proved to be pivotal in my recovery.
Addiction
, by definition, is chronic. Addicted strugglers cannot “just say no,” end their addiction, and be cured. Though God can—and sometimes does—miraculously intervene by delivering a person “overnight,” the vast majority of sufferers require long-term help or repeated periods of care to recover.
Chronic addiction
damages every aspect of a person’s being: physical, psychological, social, and spiritual. As a result, treatment is not simple.
For strugglers like Frank who cannot stop on their own, a treatment program can help manage the withdrawals and teach valuable skills for sober living. Such programs, commonly called “rehabs,” are geared toward helping…
• Stop addiction
• Maintain a healthy and addiction-free lifestyle
• Function productively within a family, at work, and in society
1
Ask these questions:
1. Does the program accept health insurance? If not, will they work with the struggler and family to create an affordable payment plan?
2. Is the program run by trained professionals who are state-accredited/licensed?
3. Is the facility clean, organized, and well-run?
4. Does the program offer treatment for a full range of needs?
5. Does it address disabilities and provide age, gender, and culturally appropriate treatment services?
6. Is the struggler’s treatment plan continuously assessed to ensure it meets changing needs?
7. Is medication, if appropriate, part of the treatment?
8. Is long-term aftercare encouraged or provided?
9. Are strategies in place to engage and keep the struggler in longer-term treatment so as to have a greater opportunity for success?
10. Is there ongoing monitoring after the struggler is released to help prevent a relapse?
11. Are there services or referrals offered to family members to ensure they understand the process and support the struggler in the course of recovery?
12. Are counseling and other behavioral therapies provided to help the struggler function within the family and community?
2
Certain key elements are common to nearly all effective rehabilitation programs. These include:
•
Initial assessment.
If the assessment reveals that urgent medical attention is needed, the struggler will be referred to a health care provider to oversee this process. (See “Detoxification” below.)
•
Plan development.
A counselor or case manager will be assigned to create a detailed treatment plan to be executed by a team of trained individuals. And just as the struggler needs support, education, and counseling, so does the family. That’s because an addiction negatively impacts how the family functions. Program providers should engage the family in treatment as early as possible.
•
Therapy.
Rehabilitation typically involves individual and group counseling. In addition, comprehensive programs will include individual-growth assignments, addiction education, life-skills training, relapse-prevention training, spiritual care, nutrition, participation in physical activities, and pain management, if necessary.
•
Discharge and aftercare.
Upon discharge, strugglers receive an aftercare plan that should be followed carefully. Aftercare is designed to provide coping skills for everyday living and be a safeguard against relapses. Aftercare plans often include a recommendation to attend some type of group counseling, such as a 12-step program (see pages 377-85), and regular meetings with a therapist. Christian programs stress the importance of active church involvement.
In cases involving physical addiction, many substance abusers will need to go through detoxification (often referred to as
detox
) before starting treatment.
•
Detoxification
refers to the clearing of toxins from the system of an alcohol-or drug-dependent person. It is part of a medically managed process designed to alleviate the short-term symptoms of withdrawal from alcohol and drug dependence.
3
•
Detoxification
is the process of weaning the body from chemical dependence. It is arduous at best, and should be undertaken with a doctor’s supervision. The risk for the most serious withdrawal symptoms (such as seizure, heart failure, and hallucination) is generally confined to a three-week period, but other signs of withdrawal (like anxiety or difficulty in sleeping) could remain for an entire year of sobriety. A doctor will often prescribe medications to lessen the most severe withdrawal symptoms and to help remove the struggler’s dependence on drugs or alcohol.
Anyone who is chemically dependent should consult their doctor for help with withdrawal and recovery. Physical, emotional, and spiritual care is needed to break the chains of addiction. For many, this will mean entering a clinic or rehabilitation facility, but others may be able to visit doctors, counselors, and therapists while recovering at home.
Rehabilitation may take place in a variety of settings. Most programs offer similar therapies, but the duration and the level of medical care may vary. The most common types of rehabilitation programs are:
•
Hospital-or medical clinic-based.
Inpatient stays in specialized rehab units are less common than they used to be, primarily because of changes in insurance coverage.
•
Residential treatment facilities.
Living in a residential facility while recovering from addiction can be especially helpful to strugglers who have little social support or who need isolation from destructive influences.
•
Partial hospitalization (day treatment).
These strugglers live at home while taking part in day treatment. This treatment works best for strugglers with supportive families and stable home environments.
•
Outpatient programs.
These types of programs are offered at hospitals, health and mental health clinics, counseling offices, and residential facilities with outpatient clinics. Many operate in the evenings and on weekends, allowing participants to continue working as they seek treatment.
•
Intensive outpatient programs.
These are more effective for people who are motivated to participate and who have supportive families and friends.
The selection of a rehabilitation program depends on the struggler’s individual circumstances. A doctor can also help determine which type of program is best.
Information on various option plans is easily obtainable; therefore, careful research will help ensure an apples-to-apples comparison. Discuss expectations, program features, costs, insurance details, and related questions with program staff.
No treatment program can categorically guarantee that a struggler will not relapse. Rehab “success” rates are notoriously difficult to quantify.
It is not uncommon for strugglers to relapse. Most studies indicate that between 50 to 90 percent of those who recover from addiction revert back following their initial recovery.
4
Key factors that contribute to relapsing back into addictive behavior include external pressures, emotional distress, mental illness, or an arrogant attitude. Similarly, major factors that reduce the risk of relapse are abstaining from the addiction, being treated by a medical professional, and becoming part of a 12-step program like Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Gamblers Anonymous, or Overeaters Anonymous.
5
Addictions have the power to control the lives of so many strugglers. But that power is nothing compared with the power of Christ to free strugglers from their strongholds. The Bible says, “The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds” (2 Corinthians 10:4).