Home at Rose Cottage (16 page)

“Forget slow,” she said in a choked voice, writhing beneath him. “Slow’s for next time or the time after that. I want you now, Mike. Please.”

A smile spread across his face. “Well, when you ask so sweetly, how can I possibly say no?”

He stripped away her panties, pushed down his own pants and entered her in one hard thrust that filled her and took the last of her breath away.

Then he began to move, teasing her, tormenting her until the sensations were too much, too raw and needy. Her body felt as if it were on fire, as if it were one exquisite nerve that was wound so tightly it was destined to snap with one more stroke, one more caress, one more flick of his tongue across her feverish skin.

In the end that was exactly what sent her flying over the edge, his tongue on her nipple sending a shock wave through her that reached her toes. She screamed, but he caught the sound by covering her mouth with his own.

And as their breath mingled and their bodies came apart in perfect harmony, Melanie was filled with a joy so pure it uncomplicated everything. There was only this man, this moment and the waves of love washing through her.

It seemed like an eternity before Mike could move again. Melanie had worn him out in the most pleasurable
way possible. He didn’t care if he never budged from his bed again.

He felt an elbow prod his ribs and moaned. “Again?”

She laughed. “No, you idiot. Even I know my limits. What I’m after is food. That chicken ought to be way past done by now.”

“It’s probably so dried out, it’s chicken jerky,” he said.

“I’m not sure I care at this point.”

He grinned at her. “You really are hungry, aren’t you?”

“Starving. Mind-boggling sex will do that.”

“Ah, flattery. You definitely know how to motivate a man,” he said, reaching for her.

“I’m not trying to motivate you to make love again,” she said impatiently, giving him a gentle shove. “I’m trying to get you out of this bed and into the kitchen.”

“Then you used the wrong tactic.”

She eyed him curiously. “What will work?”

“Mention the triple-threat chocolate cake that Pam sent over for us.”

“Oh, my God!” Melanie said, scrambling past him to grab his shirt from the floor.

Mike watched her unabashed eagerness and laughed. “Since you’re up, you can bring a tray in here.”

“Dream on. That cake is mine,” she said as she bolted from the room.

Laughing, Mike dragged on his pants and followed. By the time he reached the kitchen, she had her first forkful of cake.

“For me?” he inquired.

“I don’t think so,” she said, biting into it, then groaning with obvious ecstasy.

“Careful, or I’m going to think you like that better than sex,” he scolded.

“It’s a toss-up,” she retorted.

“You’re going to spoil dinner.”

“I don’t think so. I took a look at that chicken. It’s a goner.”

“Then I’ll nuke a frozen homemade lasagna. How does that sound?”

“Great, but I’m not waiting for it,” she said, pulling a chair out from the table and sitting down. His shirt rode so far up her thighs, Mike could hardly think straight. He simply stood and stared. She chuckled. “The lasagna?”

“What?”

“In the freezer,” she prodded.

He sighed and turned to the refrigerator. A few minutes later, the meal—one of many prepared and provided by Pam—was heating. He put the salad he’d tossed earlier on the table, then took the fork and cake away from Melanie. She didn’t protest. She just closed her eyes and sighed with pure bliss.

“I really need that recipe. I have to pass it along to Maggie, so she can use it in the magazine. She’ll be worshiped by women everywhere as a chocolate goddess.”

Mike chuckled. “Is that a goal of your sister’s?”

“Not really, but a little adoration is always good for the soul.”

“Do you want to be adored?”

“Not by hordes and hordes of people,” she said thoughtfully. “Maybe by one person.”

Mike wondered if now was the time to ask the question that had been spinning around in his head ever since he’d seen her with Jessie yesterday afternoon. It was as good a time as any, he finally concluded, searching for the right words.

“Jessie obviously adores you,” he began.

Her head shot up and her gaze met his. “She’s a great kid,” she said, an unmistakable note of caution in her voice.

Mike plunged ahead. “I’m glad you can see past the problems and recognize that. Does that mean you’d consider something a little more permanent?”

Alarm flared in her eyes. “Such as?” she asked, her tone wary.

“Don’t look so terrified. I’m not going to ask if you’d like to be her nanny,” he said. “I was thinking more along the lines of her mom. Would you consider marrying us?”

She studied him for what seemed like an eternity. “Because it’s what Jessie wants?” she asked eventually.

“No, because it’s what I want, because I think you’d be happy here. I think I could make you happy here.”

“You haven’t said anything about love.”

Mike hesitated. He knew women wanted the pretty words, but he didn’t believe in love, even now. It hadn’t done anything but cause misery in his life. His continued silence apparently spoke volumes, because Melanie shook her head and stood up.

“I need to go,” she said, looking unbearably sad.

“Now?” he asked incredulously. “You want to leave now? Why?”

“Because this is never going to work. I see that now.”

“What’s not going to work? We’ve been making love for hours. I just asked you to marry me,” he all but shouted.

“For Jessie,” she reminded him. “Not for you or even for me. That’s not good enough. I want more, Mike. I want it all. I didn’t think I did. When I came here, I was
just like you. I was sure love didn’t exist, not the way it’s portrayed in novels. Now I have this tiny glimmer of what it can be like, and I’m starting to believe.”

He wished he shared her conviction. “I can’t give you what you want,” he said, his heart heavy.

But even as he said the words, even as he saw her slipping away, he saw what she’d seen…a future that was bright because they were together. He wanted to grab it. He wanted desperately to believe that everything was possible.

But Melanie was already running from the room, leaving him behind. It wasn’t the first time a woman had left him, but this time it hurt even more.

For the first time ever, he knew the real meaning of despair and loneliness.

M
ike knew he had to go over to Pam’s to pick up Jessie, but he was dreading it. He knew there would be a thousand questions on the tip of her tongue, questions he flatly refused to answer. He wasn’t sure he could bear to see the sympathy that was bound to fill her eyes when she figured out that Melanie had turned his proposal down flat.

Or maybe what really worried him was the possibility that she would laugh herself silly and call him an idiot when she realized he’d done it all for Jessie and offered nothing of himself to Melanie. He still wasn’t sure what had kept him from laying his heart on the line. Fear, more than likely. It was the ever-present fear that had kept him from reaching out to anyone for a long time now.

Oddly, keeping the proposal all about Jessie didn’t seem to be making the sting of Melanie’s rejection one bit easier to take. That rejection was all about him and his inadequacies, just as Linda’s abandonment had been. He wasn’t enough for either one of them.

Even as he thought that, though, he knew how ridiculous it was. Linda hadn’t left because he was inadequate. She’d left because the drugs were powerful and addictive. Period. As for Melanie, hadn’t she really said that he
was
enough for her? He was the one who’d been unwilling to offer his heart.

Walking up to the Claybornes’ front door, he drew in a deep breath and braced himself. Thankfully, it was Jeff who answered the door.

“You look exhausted. I’ll take that as a good sign,” Jeff said, putting a typical male spin on things.

“You shouldn’t,” Mike growled. “Where’s Jessie?”

Jeff’s gaze narrowed speculatively. “She’s out back with Lyssa. They’re swimming. It’s a gorgeous day, in case you haven’t noticed. I can loan you a bathing suit if you’d like to join us. Pam and I are about to have breakfast out there. There’s more than enough for you, too.”

“No, thanks,” he said curtly. “I’ll just find Jessie and get out of your hair. I’m sure you’ve had enough of her by now.”

“Actually she’s been a little angel,” Jeff said, continuing to study him with a frown. “You’re the one I’m worried about. What’s up with the attitude? Didn’t things go well with Melanie?”

Mike scowled right back at him. “Look, you did the sensitive thing once. That’s enough. You’re not that great at it.”

They’d known each other long enough that Jeff didn’t take offense. He merely shook his head. “Now I really am worried. Should I get Pam?”

“God, no!” Mike said. “Please be a pal—get Jessie and don’t let on that anything’s wrong.”

“One look at your face will be all it takes for Pam to see that something’s very wrong,” Jeff warned. “Maybe you should go away and work things out with Melanie, then come back later.”

“Not going to happen,” Mike said. “Will you get Jessie or do I have to do it?”

Jeff looked as if he might poke and prod some more, but he finally shook his head. “Whatever you want, man.”

Mike heard Jessie’s screams of protest a minute later and sighed. He should have known it would be impossible to do this the easy way.

Before he could take a step in the direction of the backyard, Pam came through the house like a whirlwind.

“Why are you insisting on dragging Jessie off when she’s having such a good time?” she demanded. “And what’s with standing out here on the front stoop instead of coming around back and getting her yourself?”

Mike ignored the second question, because he figured Pam wouldn’t like hearing that he’d been avoiding her. “I came to get my daughter because it’s time for her to go home,” he said tightly.

Pam studied him as intently as Jeff had. “Not when you’re in such an obviously lousy mood,” she said emphatically. “I’ll go tell Jessie she can stay, then you and I are talking.”

“No, we’re not,” Mike said just as emphatically. He relented on one point but not the other. “Jessie can stay, but you and I are definitely not talking.”

Pam scowled at him. “Stay here,” she ordered, then went to give Jessie the good news.

Mike stared after her, muttered a curse and turned on his heel. Jessie was in good hands, and Pam was right about one thing. He was in a lousy mood. He needed to do something physical outdoors and work off some of his frustration.

Instinctively he headed for Melanie’s, just as he had on so many other Saturday mornings lately. He didn’t have to see her. Hell, he didn’t
want
to see her. He could rip out a few more weeds, check on the progress of the
plants he’d put in last week, spread around a little fertilizer, then hightail it out of there. With any luck Melanie wouldn’t even be home.

But, of course, she was. He could feel her gaze on him, but she didn’t come out of the house. When he couldn’t stand the tension a moment longer, he sighed heavily, put his gear back into his truck and left.

Instead of soothing him, for the first time in his life the work had left him edgy and more miserable than ever. But he knew from bitter experience that when his heart was aching, the only answer was work.

Just because Melanie was abandoning him didn’t mean he had to abandon their project. He would be back next week and the week after that, no matter how painful it was, because he’d made a promise to her and to her grandmother’s memory. He didn’t make a lot of promises these days, but the ones he made, he kept.

Melanie swiped angrily at the tears running down her cheeks. Why had Mike shown up here today? Was he deliberately trying to make her even more miserable than he had the night before? And where was Jessie? Melanie had grown used to having the two of them out there together, kneeling on the ground, heads bent close as Mike taught Jessie how to settle a young plant in the rich, dark earth. Jessie’s bright-as-sunshine laughter had always had a knack for making Melanie’s heart lighter. She could have used a little of that today.

But, of course, he wouldn’t bring Jessie with him. His daughter would have too many questions about why her father and Melanie weren’t even looking at each other, much less talking. That would have made an already tense situation unbearable.

So today he’d been all alone, working at a feverish
clip as if he were trying to forget something. She sure as heck knew what he was trying to forget, the same thing that was tormenting her. Damn the man and his stubborn refusal to see what was right under his nose. She loved him. She’d done everything but spell it out to him, and he’d sat there insisting that his proposal was only about providing a mother for Jessie. Well, he could just take that notion and shove it.

When the phone rang, she snatched it up. “What?”

“You sound cheery,” Maggie murmured. “Maybe I’d better call back when you’re in a better mood.”

“That could take weeks,” Melanie told her sister.

“Uh-oh. What happened?”

“Nothing I want to talk about.”

“Does that mean things aren’t going so well with the sexy gardener?”

“He’s not a gardener. He’s a landscape designer.”

“Whatever.”

“Why are you calling? Is it just to annoy me?”

“Actually I was calling to let you know that there’s a job opening here at the magazine. It’s in marketing.”

Melanie sank onto a kitchen chair. “You’re kidding!” She wasn’t sure which stunned her more, that Maggie had found the ideal job for her on a well-respected regional magazine or the fact that it would mean they’d be working together. Maggie liked having her own niche in the world. Of all of them, she’d always been the least likely to share. But she loved her sisters, and they’d always known that in a crunch she would do what she could for any one of them. This offer was proof of that.

“Not something I’d kid about,” Maggie assured her briskly.

“Are you sure you’d be comfortable having me around?” Melanie asked.

“As long as you don’t try to tell me how to run the food pages, we’ll get along just fine,” Maggie said in a dry tone that wasn’t entirely meant in jest. “Come on, sis. This is perfect for you. It’s one step above entry level, the number two spot in the department. Of course, there are only three people in the department, but that’s even better. You’ll get experience in every aspect of the marketing process. If you’re interested, I can set up an appointment first thing Monday morning. If you drove back tomorrow, you’d have plenty of time for me to brief you about the magazine. I’ve already told the marketing director all about you. She can’t wait to meet you.”

“Does this mean I’d finally get a glimpse of that sexy photographer you’ve been going on and on about?” Melanie teased.

“Let’s leave Rick out of this,” Maggie said tartly.

Melanie tried to read her tone and couldn’t. She’d thought Maggie was merely in lust with the photographer, but maybe there was more to the story than she knew. Whatever it was, she wasn’t going to get it out of her tight-lipped sister.

But thinking of the reportedly hunky photographer made Melanie glance outside. Mike was gone. She barely contained a sigh. It was over between them, so why was she even hesitating? This was just the shove she needed to head back to Boston.

Still, she couldn’t seem to make herself say yes to Maggie’s offer. “I really appreciate this, but can I think about it, at least overnight? I’ll call you first thing tomorrow morning. You can’t do anything before Monday anyway, right?”

“Why aren’t you jumping at this?” Maggie asked, obviously irritated that Melanie wasn’t reacting with more enthusiasm. “Is it Mike?”

“Mike and I are over,” Melanie insisted.

“Then I really don’t see the problem,” her sister said. “Are you worried about working with me? I’m telling you, it will be okay.”

“I’ll call you in the morning,” Melanie said without offering the explanation Maggie so obviously wanted. Maybe she kept silent because she didn’t have one, at least none that made a lick of sense.

She was still pondering the reason for her lack of enthusiasm at daybreak on Sunday. She was no closer to making a decision than she had been the day before, and maybe that was answer enough.

Fortunately, when she called home, Maggie was out. Melanie left her sister a message saying thanks but no thanks, then hung up before she could change her mind.

After that she sat staring at the phone for an eternity, wondering what on earth she’d just done. She’d turned down the chance to interview for her dream job. For what? A man who couldn’t see what was right in front of his face? Staying on in a little town where job opportunities like this one might never come along?

Apparently so. She sighed. All she knew for certain was that she needed time—time to know her own mind, time for Mike to figure out his.

Then, if there was obviously no hope at all, she’d go back to Boston. This job might be gone, but there would be others. Much as she hated admitting it, given how furious she was with him, Melanie knew in her heart that finding another man like Mike wouldn’t be nearly as easy.

Mike was beginning to question his own sanity. He couldn’t seem to stay away from Melanie’s. He was back
in the garden every Saturday waiting for who knew what to happen. Maybe he was hoping that eventually she would get his unspoken message that he wasn’t going anywhere.

He was actually surprised that she hadn’t left by now, fled to Boston just to avoid the pain of seeing him, just as she’d fled here in the first place. There was obviously nothing holding her here.

Or was there? Had she started to see through his muddled proposal to what was in his heart? Had she figured out yet that he was too terrified, too vulnerable, to put himself on the line the way she expected, the way she deserved? He was obviously waiting for a miracle that might never come.

Jeff and Pam had been badgering him for weeks now to talk to Melanie and straighten things out. They still didn’t know the whole story, only that whatever had happened had been his fault. He’d admitted that much.

Jessie was retreating into sullen silences more and more each time he refused to arrange a visit to see Melanie. Things had never been more tense between him and his daughter.

Why not just talk to Melanie and lay everything on the line? Mike asked himself. Surely he couldn’t be any more miserable than he was now.

He woke on Saturday morning to brilliant blue skies with not a cloud in them. The temperature was already in the mid-seventies by the time he dropped Jessie off at Lyssa’s and got to Melanie’s. His mind was made up. He was going to settle things once and for all today. It helped that all the plants were in the ground and flourishing. After today he’d have no more excuses for hanging around if she turned him down a second time. He’d even
driven to Richmond the day before and picked out a ring. Surely that would show Melanie how serious he was.

Of course, planning the whole thing out and actually working up the courage to knock on the door were two entirely different things. The backyard might as well have been a million miles wide. Add in a moat and that was the width of the divide between them.

He remembered something his mother had once told him years ago when he’d been scared to try out for his high school baseball team. “Nothing beats a try but a failure.” It had been her favorite saying, a message that sometimes people defeat themselves and that he should never allow himself to fall into that trap.

He knelt down to loosen the soil around the rosebushes, put a few stakes in the hollyhock garden, then tended to the foxglove and snapdragons. None of it was necessary, but it gave him time to gather his courage, all the while aware that Melanie was standing at the kitchen window, watching him.

“It’s now or never,” he told himself, but before he could move, he looked up and, like the miracle he’d been waiting for, she was there.

Melanie hadn’t been able to bear it another moment. Every Saturday for weeks now, Mike had worked in the garden. He’d never brought Jessie again and he never announced his arrival. She would just look outside suddenly and see him there, the sun glinting off the threads of gold in his hair, his muscles straining as he worked.

If he chanced to look up and spot her, he waved, but that was all. He never smiled or beckoned.

Nor did Melanie seek him out. It hurt too much simply to see him, his big hands so gentle with the fragile plants
he was tending. It hurt to know that those hands would never touch her with such tenderness again.