Give Me a Reason (6 page)

“Well, then you’d best not give her any more apples.”

Spinning around, Laura’s eyes flew open wide. “What?”

“She told me about the apple you left on her desk. Can I ask
why you did that?”

With a snort, Laura said, “Because I had just spent an hour
watching a paradox. One minute, she was rigid, mute and distant, and the next
she was...she was
so
alive. I wouldn’t have
believed it if I hadn’t seen it myself and after the class was over, I wanted
to say something, but she had already shot me a dozen nasty looks during the
lesson, so I decided against it. I was packing up to leave when I noticed the
apple from my lunch was still in my bag, so when I left, I put it on her desk.
It was just my way of saying thanks.”

“That’s what I thought.”

“Are you saying I shouldn’t have done that?”

Smiling, Kris shook her head. “No, I’m saying that the next
time you go shopping...buy more fruit.”

Chapter Five

Apprehensive about disturbing the world of a woman who she
believed was teetering on the edge, much to Krista’s dismay, Laura refused to
visit Toni’s classroom unless it was required. It wasn’t until ten days after
she had met Kris at
Exes
when Laura found
herself once again invading the troubled teacher’s space to monitor her class.

Pulling the essays out of her briefcase, Toni was glancing at
the papers when she heard the click of heavy heels coming up the corridor.
Setting her jaw, she slowly raised her eyes, and when Laura MacLeod walked into
her classroom, Toni’s stare was cold and hard, and her message was clear.
Get out
.

Aware that her presence would not be welcome, Laura simply
gave Toni a weak smile and then walked to the back of the room to find a seat.
The students filed in, some saying their hellos as they took their places and
opened their books, and a few minutes later, Toni gathered her wits and began
to teach. Sitting silently, Laura listened to the lesson as she jotted down
some notes, and when the class was over, she gathered her belongings and left
without saying a word, but not before placing an apple on Toni’s desk.

The scene was repeated the following week and the week after
that, and the only thing that changed was the lesson being taught. No words
were exchanged between the teacher and the department head. No looks of
acknowledgement were given when Laura entered the classroom, and no good-byes
were offered when she left. And even though she continued to place a shiny
apple on Toni’s desk after every visit, not once did Toni voice a thank you.
Laura wasn’t surprised.

When Laura wasn’t buried in paperwork, glad-handing possible
benefactors or monitoring classes, as part of her weekly routine, she made it a
point of visiting with each of her teachers to discuss course schedules, grades
and the like. Preferring relaxed, one-on-one meetings over lunch, rather than
structured ones held in her office, she’d go to their classrooms, and over
bagged lunches, they’d chat about their work. Having just finished such a
meeting with Susan Grant, as Laura walked down the hallway, she noticed Toni’s
door open and decided it was time to test the waters.

Toni saw her standing in the doorway immediately, but she
continued to grade papers without so much as a glance in Laura’s direction. Without
a file folder in her hand signaling a course review, Toni was confused as to
why the woman was there, and when Laura approached her desk, Toni went rigid.

Silently admonishing herself for her own stupidity, Laura
stopped and took two steps backward. “Hiya, Toni. I was just making the rounds
and thought I’d stop by to see how things were going. I know you have three new
students, and I wanted to make sure there weren’t any problems.”

Toni hated questions that couldn’t be answered with a nod or
a shake of the head, and for a minute, she sat motionless, hoping that MacLeod
would simply go on her way. When another minute passed and Laura still hadn’t
moved, Toni sighed. “Everything’s fine,” she muttered, without looking up.
“Now, if you don’t mind, I’m busy.” Picking up an essay, she returned to her
reading as if the woman standing a few feet away from her didn’t exist.

“Of course. I’m sorry I intruded. I’ll let you get back to
work.”

Although amused by Toni’s obvious brush-off, Laura didn’t
allow it to show until she walked out of the room. Shutting the door behind
her, she broke into a smile that lit up the corridor.

It was the tiniest of steps, but it was a step nonetheless.
Only a millimeter in length, across a space wider than a canyon, but the
reclusive teacher had spoken, and she had spoken to Laura. From that day on,
Toni’s classroom became part of Laura’s weekly rounds…whether Toni liked it or
not.

As the days turned into weeks, both women found it impossible
not to think about the other.

Alone in her darkened flat, Toni would sit with her cigarette
and beer, staring at the bottle of vodka filled with poison, but not
contemplating its contents. A student had made a comical remark one day, and
from the back of the room came a chuckle, low and sexy. Toni knew in an instant
it belonged to Laura MacLeod, and she found herself wanting to look up, to see
the smile, the gaiety...but fear blocked her path. It was unimaginable to think
she could allow a virtual stranger to become anything more. To trust was impossible,
but as each day passed, Toni began listening for the footsteps and inhaling
deeply at the scent of a stranger’s perfume.

For Laura, finding a comfortable balance between work and
leisure had never been her strong point, so bringing work home was nothing
unusual. Although Duane had called once or twice, leaving messages on the
machine asking for another chance, Laura hadn’t returned the calls. Nightly,
she immersed herself in her work, sipping a glass of wine as she moved through
the papers, unconsciously saving the reports on Toni’s classes until last.
She’d open a file and get lost in its contents, remembering the lesson as if
she was a student and the teacher as if she was a friend. Toni was so animated
in her teaching that Laura found herself watching every move she made. How she
waved her arms to make a point or clapped her hands when a student grasped a
concept, and once, on an afternoon filled with sun and warmth, Laura had heard
her laugh. She couldn’t remember ever hearing anything sound so wonderful.

***

It was one of those days when you wanted to be at home,
snuggled under the covers with a good book and a cup of tea, but that was a
luxury that didn’t apply to the working masses. Rain or shine, they came to
work and did their time. As she stood under the overhang, cupping her hands
against the wind to light a cigarette, Susan Grant wished that she was a member
of the upper class if only to enjoy rainy days wrapped in the comfort of her
duvet.

Hearing the door open, Susan moved enough to let Toni out,
and as soon as the door closed, both women hugged the wall to prevent
themselves from getting drenched. Lighting her cigarette, Toni took a deep drag
and then looked at the sky. “Shitty day.”

Stunned to hear the woman speak, it took Susan several
seconds before she could find her voice. “Yes…yes, they say it’s supposed to do
this all weekend.”

Toni didn’t dislike Susan Grant. Like Switzerland, her
feelings were those of neutrality where it concerned the blonde woman with the
easy smile. Although she had never joined in the camaraderie that Susan had
offered in the early days, a part of Toni appreciated the fact that she had
tried to include her. Craving a cigarette for more than an hour, Toni,
nevertheless, had waited until she saw Susan walk past her classroom door with
jacket in hand before excusing herself from her class to grab a much-needed
smoke. Having become accustomed to Laura’s weekly visits, as Toni looked out
into the storm, curiosity got the best of her. “Is MacLeod on holiday?”

“What?” Susan asked, glancing at Toni. Surprised that she was
actually making eye contact with the woman, Susan said, “No...um...she’s been
at a conference for the past few days. She’ll be back on Monday.”

Flicking her cigarette into a puddle, Toni yanked open the
door and went back inside.

***

After three days of listening to lectures, Laura was ready
for the weekend. Running through the parking lot, she skipped over puddles,
only to fumble for her keys for another minute before managing to get into her
car. While the defogger cleared the glass, she checked her briefcase and
sighed. She would have loved to spend the entire weekend vegetating in front of
the television, but catching up on work would be far more productive. Knowing
she had a stack of reports on her desk that needed attention, Laura pulled out
of the lot and turned in the direction of Calloway House.

Arriving less than an hour later, as Laura pulled into her
parking spot a shiver ran down her spine when she noticed two police cars
driving away from the building. Ignoring the fact that the skies had opened up,
she jumped out of her car and ran into the building.

Seeing Bryan coming down the stairs, Laura asked, “Bryan, why
were the police here?”

“A couple of our residents got into a fight on the third
floor. It was quite a row.”

“What in the world happened?”

“We’re not quite sure, but the flat’s totaled, and
Laura...one of them had a knife.”

“A knife!”

“Yeah. As far as we can tell, she had it hidden in her
mattress. She was already going to lose her probation because of the fight, so
I guess she decided what the hell.”

“Jesus Christ.”

“Anyway, Jack got it away from her, and then we called the
police.”

“Well, thank God no one was hurt.”

“Laura, I’m not so sure about that. Toni was the first one up
there. By the time Jack and I arrived, the place was a mess. When we took over,
she disappeared, and I’m fairly certain I saw blood on her shirt.”

“Blood? Are you sure it was hers?”

“Well, other than a few scrapes, I didn’t see any injuries on
the women. After all the commotion died down, I went to Toni’s classroom to
check on her, but it was empty, and I looked in the car park. Her Jeep’s gone.”

“All right. Thanks, Bryan,” Laura said. “I’ll just go up and
look around. Make sure you file a report before you leave, and email me a copy.
Will you please?”

“Sure thing.”

Trotting up the stairs, Laura rushed to Toni’s classroom.
Flicking on the light, her eyes darted around the empty room. Noticing a dark
blue jacket hanging on the back of a chair, she walked over and picked it up.
Undoubtedly Toni’s, the threadbare collar and faded fabric announcing its
ownership, Laura fingered the worn cloth as she debated on what to do, but then
she noticed something at her feet. Amidst the gray and blue speckles of the white
linoleum was something that didn’t belong, and stooping over she touched the
dark splotch with her finger. When it came back covered in blood, Laura
blanched. “Shit.”

Forty-five minutes later, she sat in her car outside a
dilapidated old building, checking the numbers painted on the front step with
the ones in Toni’s file. Closing the folder, Laura glanced at the first-aid kit
sitting on the passenger seat, trying to decide if she dare carry it inside.
The torrential rain having not eased a drop, she took a deep breath before
jumping out of the car and running into the building. Pausing long enough to
push her soaked hair out of her face, she headed up the stairs. Three flights
later, Laura walked down a dim hallway and stopped in front of a door with a
crooked D nailed to its surface.

***

Having finished her last class of the day, Toni had been
gathering papers to grade at home when she heard screams coming from upstairs.
Running from the room, she took the steps two at a time and jogged down the hall
toward a crowd of women congregating in front of one of the flats. Fighting her
way in, she found the flat in shambles, and what was left of the meager
furniture was now being used as weapons, the two ex-convicts trying to pummel
the other with whatever they could grab. Acting on instinct, Toni pushed them
apart and tried her best to keep them separated until help arrived.

One was small, almost spindly, but by the words she spewed,
Toni knew that the woman’s mouth had caused the fight, and it was all Toni
could do to keep her in her place as the expletives continued to fly. The other
was large and dumpy, with frizzy brown hair and insanity in her eyes, and while
Toni struggled to contain the spindly woman, the other one continued to shout
and threaten. Concentrating on keeping the one woman pushed against the wall,
when Toni saw her eyes bulge, she turned around, but there was no time to
react. The force of the chair rung hitting her on the temple knocked her to her
knees.

Stunned, it took several seconds before Toni could gather her
wits enough to stand, and that’s when she saw the glint of a blade in the dumpy
one’s hand. Trying to avoid the knife now slashing in her direction, she raised
her arms to ward off the attack. Toni dodged one way and then the other, her
eyes darting around the room, trying to find something to use to protect
herself, and then suddenly her arm turned cold. Confused, she lowered her eyes
and watched as the pale yellow fabric of her shirt began to turn crimson.

Her heart felt like it was about to explode, the combination
of adrenaline and fear causing her body to rush, and when she raised her eyes
and saw the crazed woman coming at her again, Toni held her breath. For a few
seconds, time seemed to stand still as the prey realized it was caught and the
hunter moved in for the kill, but then shouts, masculine and deep, filled the
room. Jack and Bryan stormed in, the language teacher quickly disarming the
woman with the knife as Bryan shoved the other hard into a corner.

Pushing her way through the sea of women crowded around the
doorway, Toni stumbled down the stairs. With her heart hammering against her
ribs as her anxieties reigned supreme, she rushed into her classroom. Grabbing
her briefcase, she staggered down the stairs and out into the pouring rain, the
flood of water going unnoticed as she walked unsteadily to her car.

She drove home on instinct, barely able to see through the
sheets of water and the glare from oncoming headlights. She was propelled
through the night by the need to get to her sanctuary where no one could
intrude, no one could hurt her...and no one could see the terror in her eyes.

***

In the safety of her flat, Toni stood in the kitchen, her
blood mixing with water as it puddled on the floor. Focusing on the hum of the
refrigerator compressor, she prayed that its thrum would drown out the sound of
her heart pounding in her ears. She needed to concentrate to keep the horrors
of her memories at bay, but then the rapping started, and it brought her back
to now.