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The midwife’s eyes softened for the first time since we walked in, as she looked at the screen and she flicked the mouse around.

She moved the curser to a large white circle at the edge of the screen and left it there.

“That, is your baby.” She announced. She moved the curser each time, showing us different parts of the baby. “Here you have the head, the heart, the legs and the hands.”

I was so engrossed, I didn’t even notice how hard Ruben was squeezing my hand until he let go to lean closer to the screen.

“Not to sound stupid here, Doctor. But it looks awfully big for a bean sized baby.”

She gave him a condescending look. Oh, Dr Cross was back.

“That’s because it’s not a bean sized baby,” She looked at me and asked, “When did you say you last had a period?”

“I really don’t know, maybe five or six months ago. But that’s usual for me.”

She hmm’d.

“Well, from the measurements and development of the foetus, I estimate your due date to be April sixteenth.”

My jaw dropped. I looked at Ruben, he was staring at Dr Cross like she’d grown a second head.

“B-but...that’s in like...four months!” I stuttered.

“That is correct. It looks like you are twenty three weeks and two days. Of course, this is only judged by the size of the baby and as we cannot determine when you actually conceived by your menstrual cycle. So you could be a week either side of that realistically.”

I was speechless. You’re supposed to have at least seven eight months, give or take a few weeks, to prepare for a baby!

“Does that mean you can see if it’s a boy or a girl?” Ruben asked.

We hadn’t discussed it, mainly because we hadn’t had chance, but also because I don’t think either of us had realised that I’d be that far along.

“If baby cooperates, then yes we should be able to see today. Would you like to know?”

I glanced up at him, I didn’t even need to ask.

“Yes, please.” I answered.

She moved the wand across my stomach, searching. Within moments, she clicked a few buttons and froze the screen. I looked blank. I was just staring at three little white lines and I had no idea what that meant.

“Mm hmm, she’s not even a little bit shy.”

“She?” Ruben whispered, sounding like he was in awe.

“You have yourselves a little girl in here.” She nodded.

A girl!

A princess.

Dr Cross printed out a few photos of the scan, advised me to get dressed and to join her back at her desk. I did so, in silence.

She took four vials of my blood and handed me a prescription for calcium tablets and an appointment card for two weeks time. Before we left she asked if we had any questions and Ruben and I seemed to jump in at the same time. I smiled at him, but he let me go first.

“I’m worried, if I’m already twenty three weeks, why have I not felt any movement or anything? Or had morning sickness? Or tender boobs? Or a weird taste of metal in my mouth? And, why don’t I have a bump yet?” I was growing more and more panicked by the end of my questions and she looked annoyed.

“The metal taste does not happen to everyone, it can be due to a lack of iron in the blood but it’s not uncommon to not have that at all - same with morning sickness. Yes, you were obviously one of the lucky ones who do not have any, but the baby is absolutely fine so do not worry. Your breasts may not grow tender at all; or at least not until later in your pregnancy and especially after the baby is born.” She stopped and took a breath.

“It’s perfectly normal, with first pregnancies, for mothers not to show until they’re well into their fifth month. You’ll probably have a couple more weeks, maybe less, until your baby decides to start making you uncomfortable and stretching your womb. As for the movements, again it’s your first pregnancy and we usually advise not to worry until after twenty weeks because you may not even know that you are feeling the baby move. Obviously, seeing as you are already past that milestone and the baby is fine, I would assume that you are indeed feeling movements. As you did not know that you were pregnant until a few days ago, is it not possible that you have just been unaware of the movements?”

My tummy took that opportunity to flutter and I wondered if I had just been ignoring the signs for a while.

*~*~*

Ruben

I watched the look that came over her face and I knew that she was realising she’d been feeling the baby for a while. I also knew that she had panicked when the stupid midwife told her that she was already twenty three weeks pregnant.

I wasn’t worried.

The fact that my beautiful fiancé, had already gone through almost half of her pregnancy and not had any issues, made me feel practically giddy. My girl, always so incredible without even realising it.

I had questions, more questions than I thought I could voice, but I decided against asking Dr Cross...mainly because I hated her and she had judged us the second she saw us.

No, we were not married yet.

Yes, my girl was still kind of young to be a mother.

No, that did not give her the right to pass judgement.

She didn’t know anything about us or the life we could give to our child.

The second we left the building, I turned to Lydia.

“We’re going private. I am
not
letting that woman treat you like that, look down her nose at you and have a blatant disregard for your feelings like that.”

“Ok.” She shrugged.

“Ok?” I copied, as a question.

“Yeah. I don’t care. I didn’t like her, she was rude and mean. But Ruben, did you hear what she said? We have just four months to prepare for this baby.
Four months!
”

I just knew she was having an internal freak-out about that. I gave her a reassuring smile and pulled her into my arms. Her hands slid around my waist and she held on tight.

“You can’t panic about this. We can’t change it, and it really makes no difference. This is a good thing, we get to meet our baby sooner than you thought!”

“But don’t you get it? We still have to find somewhere decent to live, buy all the things we need to buy, pack a hospital bag...and we still have to sort ourselves out first!”

“Stop.” I demanded. Her working herself up wasn’t going to fix anything. “You can’t do this. We can find somewhere to live in four months, and even if we don’t, we can stay at Jackson’s house until we do. You know money isn’t an issue anymore, and as much as I’m sure you’ll want to argue, if you let them girls, especially Harper, loose with a credit card – we’ll be sorted within a few hours. Packing a hospital bag will not take long and we have time, so that’s just a moot point.”

“As for our relationship, yes we have things to talk about, but nothing has changed for me. I love you and you love me, everything else will work itself out because that’s what we’ve always done.”

Her shoulders deflated.

“I’m sorry. I really need to work on that habit of freaking out over nothing. I’ll get better, I promise.”

I smiled at her, even though she couldn’t see me because her head was still buried in my chest.

“You already are. You just had a shock today and that’s normal.”

We stood silently for a while, me leaning against the car and her leaning against me. I was desperate to get home and tell everyone the good news but Lydia seemed content to stay for a while and what she wanted, I’d give her.

Her head shot up from my chest and I was pretty close to getting a head-butt to the chin.

She whispered in awe, “We’re having a girl!”

“Yeah, beautiful, we are.”

Chapter Twenty-One

Ruben

“Can I have a word?” I asked.

Jase turned to me, looking apprehensive, but still a little pissed off. Not that I blamed him of course. “Sure, what’s up?”

I nodded my head over to the opposite end of the bar from where the girls were sat and he followed me.

“I need to apologise for everything I said before at the club. I know, you know, that I didn’t mean it. But it was still completely out of line and you didn’t deserve it. You shouldn’t have had to be in that position in the first place.”

“Well, um, thanks? I didn’t expect an apology, but I did avoid you guys for a while because it just felt awkward. I’m not sorry that I told her because she
did
need to be told. But still, I’m sorry that it fucked you guys up for a while.” He replied.

I was shocked, humbled even, that he’d accepted my apology so easily and he actually felt bad about causing issues. I didn’t want anyone shouldering any of the blame for my fuck-ups though.

I squeezed his shoulder, “Don’t. Don’t be sorry about anything because all you need to do is look at Lydia, to see that you did the right thing. It should have been me, but it wasn’t. So I’m glad that
you
were the one who got to give her that.”

I walked away.

I didn’t want to see the gratitude in his eyes for me giving him something he rightly deserved.

As soon as I reached the table, Mase stood up.

“To the next Brent baby! Another girl to welcome into the family. Good luck with that, brother!” He snickered, with his glass in the air and a grin on his face.

Jackson put a hand over his heart and wiped non-existent tears from his eyes.

“My baby is having a baby!” He whimpered sarcastically.

“Shut it, jackass!”

He laughed out loud, then his face dropped slightly and he looked me in the eyes. I braced, not being able to get a read on what his face meant.

“Seriously though, Ruben. You’re still only twenty-three. It’s a big deal and you don’t even seem to be panicking slightly.”

I glanced around thinking it probably wasn’t the best time or place to be having this conversation seeing as the girls were sat about ten feet away at the bar.

The little family pub was only a mile or so away from Jackson’s house so he thought it’d be a nice idea to take us out for a pub lunch and drinks, rather than go to the club.

Lydia was on lemonade, of course.

I looked her way at the bar and smiled when she threw her head back laughing at something Harper had said. If anyone could make her laugh, it didn’t surprise me that it’d be Harper. The girl had no filter.

She wasn’t listening. Good.

Swinging my eyes back to my brothers, I kept my promise to Lydia and gave them nothing but honesty.

“I’m petrified.”

Jackson smiled like he knew exactly what I meant.

“I don’t know anything about pregnancies, or babies or being a dad. I know about being an uncle, but that’s not the same. No one knows when Lydia is going to freak out about something tiny again, or when Freddy…”

I stopped and gulped.

They didn’t know about Freddy. No one really did.

“Who’s Freddy?” Jackson asked, immediately.

Honesty, Ruben. Honesty.

I looked from Mase, to Jackson, and back again. Then I leant forward, and told them everything. Everything, from why Lydia came back into my life, to Lucas being in Jail and Freddy being there too until just a few weeks before. Including the fact that I had no idea where Freddy was at that moment in time.

I watched the emotions flit across their faces, mirrored expressions stared back at me. Shock, confusion, anger...disappointment.

When I’d finished, the silence stretched for what felt like hours.

“I can’t…” Mase began, but he wasn’t allowed to finish.

“Grab your fucking coats, get the girls and let’s go.” Jackson demanded. From the look on his face, I didn’t much feel like arguing.

*~*~*

Lydia

I didn’t know what happened. One second, I was sitting at the bar with a glass of lemonade in front of me, laughing at one of Harper’s ridiculous comments about the bartender - the next - I was being dragged along the street towards Jackson’s house.

“What’s going on?” I asked.

Ruben shook his head but didn’t answer me. It was such a perfect day and all of a sudden, everyone seemed on edge.

Jase stopped at the end of the road.

“I’m not sure what’s happening, but I’m going to take off. Got a hot date!” He raised his eyebrows and winked.

I turned to Harper, who was a few steps behind us with Mase. “What happened to Aaron?”

She rolled her eyes and everyone chuckled slightly, “Welcome to the revolving door of Jase’s lovers. He has a new one every week. I doubt he’ll ever settle down.”

Well, that was a bit of information I hadn’t known. I thought he seemed really into the guy.

The second we arrived back at Jackson’s house, he stood in the middle of the lounge with his arms folded and scowled at Ruben. I thought they’d sorted their issues out - but his face said otherwise.

“Do you want to tell everyone - or should I?” He asked, directing his question to Ruben.

He shot a guilty glance at Mase before speaking up and explaining the story of our history. Then he looked at me, and told me yet more
fucking
details that I didn’t know.

And I should have known.

“About a month ago, Lucas phoned me from inside and said that Freddy was out. Don’t know when, or why, or how, but he is. I’ve been trying to find out where he is, but no one seems to know. His old phone hasn’t been activated, but that doesn’t surprise me. So I guess we’re playing the waiting game because unless he finds us first...it’s looking like we have no chance of finding him.”

He finished with a shrug and I could feel my body automatically begin to tremble.

He might have let me go once before, but right down to my bones, I knew Freddy wouldn’t let me go forever. Little old me, when I was just an eighteen year old girl, had managed to give the police their opportunity to bring him down. Never, not ever, would he let that go. And now that they all knew the details - every person in that room was looking at me with fear and pity in their eyes.

Because they knew.

There was only two options of who could win.

Him or me.

In a heartbeat, Ruben was stood directly in front of me and he tilted my pale face up to meet his eyes.

“I will
not
let him hurt you, Lyds.
I won’t.
” He swore.

In a fear-choked whisper, I replied, “You can’t stop him, Ruben. You got lucky before because Freddy played a game and he lost. He will
not
lose a second time. You know it.”

He growled and bent his knees so he was at eye-level with me.

“I fucking promise you Lydia, this is not a game, but he will lose. He’s angry and he’s out for revenge. That’s a recipe for disaster in itself. Because God damn it! We’re fighting for
us
and we’ve got love, each other and a whole damn family behind us. He’s a criminal asshole, sure. But he’ll never have what we have and that’s how I know he can’t beat us here.”

Jackson, or Jax as he’d asked me to call him earlier, cleared his throat and we both swung our eyes to him.

He didn’t look pissed anymore, just reflective.

“So what’s your plan?” He asked.

“I’m not stupid, I know that I can’t do anything to him. That guy, even if he’s been locked up for years, will still have an army of dickheads doing his dirty work. Plus, he’s probably armed to the teeth and I don’t have that. But I do have my memories.” Ruben started, shooting another look at Mase who had gone white as a sheet. “So he’s got two choices, he either stays away from Lydia, from
all
of us forever...or I’ll go to the police and tell them
everything
he did to us as kids. Mase, I want you to be there too, I need you to have my back with this.”

Mase swallowed.

Ruben continued. “Fact is that, no, I can’t hurt him. I’d be stupid to try. But I
can
restrain him long enough to take myself to the station and tell him about the drugs, the shit he used to give our parents
and
about the child abuse. I have a vivid memory and I’ll recount that shit in
graphic
detail.”

“I’m in.” Mase declared, sounding more sure than he looked.

The brothers shared a look, I couldn’t help but notice that Jax stood to the side, letting them have their moment.

He really did look like a proud parent.

He caught my eye and winked. That’s when it hit me, he wasn’t pissed when we left the bar, he was worried. He just wanted Ruben to have a plan. It wasn’t the best of plans, even I knew that, but it was a plan all the same.

“Am I the only one who’s shit scared right now?” Harper demanded, throwing a hand on her hip. “There’s some badass drug dealer running around the streets and no one has any idea where he is, so we just carry on with our lives until he decided to rock up and kidnap our girl here?” She threw a hand in my direction.

It actually made me smile that, within a day, I’d been claimed into their group without a second thought. Even though it was
me
who was bringing the danger to their door.

“Um no,” Taylor said. “I’m pretty damn scared too! We’ve got a baby to think about here! We’re not vigilantes or whatever - not one of us has a clue what we’re doing!” She ended on a high-pitched screech and Jax took three long strides across the room, pulling her into his arms. She instantly melted into him.

Cute.

“Hate to break it to you, Tay,” surprisingly, it was Mase who spoke up. “But we kind of do. We know exactly what we’re dealing with and everything that could go wrong. If
anyone
is going to know what Freddy is capable of - it’s us. See this scar?” He asked, pointing to a thin white scar across his bicep. He was talking to Taylor, but Harper and I nodded too. “Freddy did it. When I was fifteen, because we hadn’t made good enough sales that week.”

“Huh, I never even noticed that scar before.” Harper muttered.

Mase actually smirked, “You’re not usually looking for scars when my top is off, babe.”

Harper clicked her fingers and looked like she’d had a ‘light bulb’ moment, “Oh yeah! That would be why.” She snickered at herself.

“Right, no getting off track here. Jase will be back with Harley in less than an hour and if you guys are really willing to help, then It’d be great if you had any ideas on  ways to draw Freddy out.”

“Um, wouldn’t the best idea be for me to just start walking places on my own? Maybe even go visit my mum or something?” I suggested.

Ruben scowled at me, “And use yourself as bait? No.”

“This is my problem more than yours, and definitely more than anyone else’s in this room! I’ve been on my own for the last three weeks and he hasn’t shown up has he? Maybe he isn’t coming after me at all.” I pointed out.

“Ok, so you make a good point but it’s still not happening.”

I shrugged and sat down. That was my one idea and he’d flat out told me ‘no’, so I just decided I wouldn’t bother having any further input.

Like I was sat watching a tennis match, my eyes bounced back and forth between Mase and Ruben as they threw ideas around, but when they caught on Jackson, my eyebrows drew together. He had leant back against the wall and folded his arms behind his head, looking like he didn’t have a care in the world.

Odd.

Finally, in the midst of what felt like a thousand voices saying nothing at all. He spoke up.

“Yo! Either of you knuckleheads think of asking
me
?”

Ruben and Mase stopped instantly and looked at him blankly. No, no they hadn’t thought of asking him, clearly.

“Mase, remember that guy I said I was keeping an eye on because I didn’t like the way he’d been hanging around the club? I didn’t like that he was there every night, always on his own, always just sitting at the bar and watching?”

Mase shrugged, “Vaguely, yeah.”

“Well I haven’t heard about him.” Ruben added.

Rolling his eyes and stepping away from the wall, Jax broke my heart a little, then put it back together - with cement.

“No, you wouldn’t have heard about him because you were too busy moping around to pay attention to anything else. If you weren’t family, I’d have fired you! It supposed to be your job to keep your eye on things. But anyway, this guy, there was just something about him that I didn’t trust. So here,” he scrolled through his phone for a second and held it out. “This the guy you’re talking about? I don’t particularly remember him, but since you mentioned it, I just knew.”