that, we moved on to one of Kelly's specialty brainstorming sessions.
"Okay, everyone, start talking. We've got the premiere for
Shrek 3
next month. Invites need to be out within two weeks.
Skye's in charge of this one. What's the enticement?"
"I still don't understand why we agreed to do a premiere for a
kids' movie," Skye whined, which I noticed she did a lot at meetings.
"Why can't the studio handle their own premiere for that
one?"
"That was a rhetorical question, right? We do premieres because
they're easy and pay well. You know DreamWorks has their
own internal PR, but as you also know, they're tied up with all the
awards shows and bigger pictures' publicity, and besides, virtually
all of the important press is in New York. We have relationships
with people they don't."
"I know, I know." Skye sighed in a very unteamlike way. I saw
Elisa shoot her a look, and she sat up a little bit straighten "It's just
that kids' movies are so boring."
"Well, Skye, if you're not interested in overseeing this, I'm sure
Elisa or Leo or Bette or even Brandon wouldn't mind stepping in. I
don't think I need to point out just how many celebs are having
kids these days . . . Liv, Courteney, Gwyneth, Sarah Jessica, just
to name a few. I hope you're not saying that their children are
boring."
"No, of course not. You can count on me—I'm up for it. We've
done a dozen of these. Okay. Does anyone have the report on the
Harry Potter
premiere we did over the summer?"
"Yep, right here," Leo said, pulling a stapled packet from a
folder. "Sunday afternoon in August, at Christie Brinkley's estate in
Bridgehampton. Party started at eleven A.M., with the screening
from twelve to one-thirty to allow everyone enough time to get
back to the city. Children's entertainment included wading pools
filled with ice and juice packs, horseback riding, a small petting
zoo, a cotton-candy machine, a sno-cone maker, a few roving
clowns. Adults were kept amused by highly attentive and attractive
cocktail waitresses serving socially acceptable day drinks from a
hidden bar inside—mostly mimosas, Bloody Marys, screwdrivers,
champagne, margaritas, sangria, and the occasional frozen daiquiri
or pina colada if requested. Matt Lauer, Susan Sarandon, Katie
Couric, Aerin Lauder, Kate Hudson, Russell Simmons, and
Courteney Cox all had children in attendance, in addition to hundreds
of others who were slightly less recognizable but just as photogenic.
Pics appeared in
People, US Weekly, Star,
Sunday Styles,
Gotham, W,
and a dozen online social pages, including but not
limited to the New York Social Diary and Patrick McMullen's website.
Warner Brothers was thrilled."
"Okay, kids, so we've got the template, and we obviously
know what works. Clearly we won't be in the Hamptons, but we
should stick with the same format. I like the Clearview in Chelsea
because they're pretty relaxed about having lots of action in their
lobby," Kelly said, efficiently checking things off a list. "What else?"
"Well, for food, the usual kid favorites," Elisa said. "Pigs in
blankets, quarter-sized burgers, candy hunts."
"Make your own sundae," Leo added without pause.
"Balloons, magicians, design your own cupcake, bubble machines,"
Skye said without the least bit of enthusiasm.
"Guy in a monster Shrek outfit."
"Face-painting the kids green."
"Parents hate face-painting. Plenty of other stuff you can do.
Maybe those mini-trampolines?"
"Are you kidding? Total liability. Might as well just have 'Sue
Me' in lights. Speaking of which, how about 'Shrek' spelled out in
a massive wall of green lightbulbs?"
Everyone nodded. I started to get slightly self-conscious about
not having contributed anything, but I'd never been to a movie
premiere and didn't know anything about them besides stars walking
down the red carpet.
"What if we have a green carpet instead of a red one?" I offered
before considering how stupid it sounded. I braced myself,
but the faces at the table looked fairly happy.
"Fab idea, Bette! We'll have a green carpet and a giant green
walk-and-repeat at the end where everyone can get photographed.
Green carpet should definitely mean more pictures. Things sound
like they're going smoothly there, so let's move on to what really
matters. Where are we with the
Playboy
party?"
The color had returned to Elisa's face, and she appeared more
composed. She stood with perfect posture in her Diane von
Furstenberg wrap dress and pointed to the bulletin board with her
Mason Pearson brush.
"As you can all see, we are just a few months away. After much
scouting and debating, we have selected Sanctuary as our location.
Leo, can you update us on the logistics?"
Leo looked at Elisa as if to say "Since when am I answering to
you?" but then cleared his throat and told the room he was interviewing
production companies (who would handle everything
from furniture to lighting) and should have the shortlist by the end
of the week. "I'm sure we'll end up with Bureau Betak," he said.
"We always do."
The meeting continued for another hour and a half (we covered
gift bags, potential sponsors, and invitations) before we were
released for lunch with the encouragement to go somewhere we'd
"see or be seen." I begged out of going to Pastis with the group
and roamed a few blocks east to a divey pizza joint where I surely
wouldn't run into anyone from the office. As soon as 1 had wedged
my body into a tiny booth near the restroom, I called Will at work
and was surprised to find him at his desk.
"Why are you there?" I asked. "It's not even deadline day." Will
only went to his office at the paper once or twice a week, less if
he could help it.
"Hello, darling. I'm struggling a bit with this week's column."
He was quiet for a split second before adding, "Lately, it seems I'm
struggling a bit with
every
week's column."
He sounded frustrated and resigned at the same time, two sentiments
I wasn't accustomed to hearing from Will.
•
"Are you okay, Will? What's going on there?" I asked, forcing
myself to forget my own problems for just a few seconds.
He sighed heavily. "Nothing interesting, darling, that's for sure.
Readership of 'Will of the People' is way down this year. Another
few papers dropped it from syndication. My new thirty-one-yearold
editor has no sense of humor—keeps telling me that 'today's
readers' are more 'socially sensitive' and that therefore 1 should
strive to be more 'politically correct.' Naturally, I told him to fuck
off, but he won't stay quiet for long. Then again, why would anyone
want to read my column when they can read about pretty
young party planners gallivanting about with rich, famous pretty
boys?"
I felt like I'd been punched. "You saw."
"Naturally. Am I to assume there was any truth to that tawdiy
little write-up?" he asked.
"Of course not!" I wailed loud enough to cause the cashier to
turn and glare at me. "I saw- Philip at Sanctuary this weekend,
when I was there for work. We shared a cab home because it was
less complicated. The other girl was his family friend. Childhood
family friend. The whole thing could not have been less scandalous."
"Well, then, it seems this lillie Insider character is doing her job
splendidly. Take comfort in the fact that they didn't use your name,
darling. But don't think for a minute that it won't come soon."
"Do you know who she is, Will? I mean, you must have met
her somewhere along the line, don't you think?"
I heard Will chuckle and imagined the worst. "Well, I've certainly
heard lots of names bandied about, but there are no solid
leads. Some people insist it's some socialite ratting out all her
friends. Others seem to think it's an unknown with a few wellplaced
sources. For all we know, it could be that ex-fashion editor—
oh, what was her name? The one who keeps busy penning
nasty book reviews? I could see her writing trash like this."
"It's just creepy. I'm about ready for whomever it is to start focusing
on someone else, you know? Someone a little more interesting,
who might actually be living a scandalous life? I definitely
don't qualify." I bit into a piece of pizza, possibly the most perfect
slice in the world.
"I understand, darling, truly I do. But Philip qualifies, don't forget!
I hate to go rushing off, but my column doesn't seem to want
to write itself this week. Talk soon? Will we see you at dinner this
Thursday?"
"Of course," I said automatically before realizing that I was expected
to attend the launch of a new Gucci fragrance that night. I
knew I'd have to call back and cancel, but I just couldn't bring myself
to do it now. "Wouldn't miss it for the world. Talk to you later."
I finished my little slice of heaven and ordered a second, which
I also knocked off in record time. I was listlessly staring at a tattered
copy of the
Post
someone had left on the table when my
phone rang.
HOME
flashed on the caller ID.
"Hello?" I answered, wondering whether it was my mother or
father—or both, since they often enjoyed the tag-team calling of
first one, then the other, then all three of us talking from different
extensions.
"Bette, is that you?" my mother practically shouted. "Can you
hear me?" Her voice was, as usual, louder than necessary. She was
convinced that cell phones required above-average volume from
all involved parties and therefore screamed whenever she called
mine.
"I can hear you, Mom. Perfectly. How are you?"
"I can't really talk since I'm running into a scheduling meeting,
but one of the girls at the clinic today said she saw your picture on
some website. A picture of you and a famous boy and another girl?
Or something to that effect."
Impossible! My mother, who had only recently registered for
her own email address, was now receiving information about the
content of online gossip columns? I was quick to deny it. "It was
nothing, Mom, just a little photo of me at a work event."
"Bette, that's wonderful! Congratulations! I can't wait to see it. I
asked Dad to get online and print it out, but he couldn't seem to
open the page or something. Save us a copy?"
"Of course," I said meekly. "Will do. But seriously, it's nothing
important, just work stuff. I have to get back to the office, so can I
call you later?"
"Sure, dear. Congrats again. Not at the job long, and already
you're making headlines!"
If only she knew, I thought as I clicked off the phone. Thankfully,