Emmerson's Heart (31 page)

“Emmy, I never told you this, but you….um….you called out his name a few times while you were sleeping. Em, you love him. You really love him just as you always
have. I will be fine. I will be just fine as long as we are still best friends.”

“If you knew that this would happen, then why did you insist on bringing me here?”

“Because, I love you that much, too. We shared something amazing, Honey. Something that I will never find with anyone else. Maybe I will. I don’t know. If you leave with me now, you will never be mine completely. Every time that you hold my hand or kiss me, it will be Paul in your mind like it has so many times already. Go. Go to him and love him like you still do.”

“So, neither of you want me?”

“Both of us do with all of our hearts, Emmy, but I am pretty sure that one of us does more than the other.” His eyes shifted back to his brother. “Emmy, be happy. Be happy for once.”

“I am happy.” The tears drained faster as I just looked at him and held his hand as tight as I could. I couldn’t lose Marc. He helped me so much that I couldn’t let him go.

“I know that you are really trying, Baby. I know.” Reaching over, he kissed my cheek and tugged the handle of the door. “If he ever hurts you, I will be right there.”

“I love you, Marc. I do
, so much.”

“Go, Emmy. You two need to just be together. Give him that. Give him the one who already has your amazing heart.”

Nodding, I struggled to get out of the car after seeing the tear dripping from his left eye. Looking back at him, I watched the hurt fill into his face. To give up everything like he had to bring me home just to have me walk away was hard for him. I just hoped like hell that he would find someone that would be so good to him. Someone that could give him their whole heart and mind.

Watching him pull away, my heart jumped hard in my chest. Turning around, I watched Paul go to Ben and pat his neck. Tipping his head, he sucked in a hard, deep breath. “Jackson, you really got your wish. You got it
, old man, and I am gone. I am walking away.”

The pain hit me harder as I watched his anger fill into his shoulders. God, had Jackson really made him push me away? There was no way that I could ever be mad at Jackson over this. No way. He was just trying to protect me. But for a man to actually try to right his wrong in the way that he was trying to at Christmas, I had to forgive him.

“Well, boy. At least you have her back. At least you will be able to keep an eye on her for me. Make sure that you take good care of her. She’s really something else.” His eyes shifted over to me as they filled with so many tears I was surprised that he had even seen me still standing there. “Emmy…”

“Marc found this in the desk.” Taking the letter, I managed to make it up the incline to give it to him. Opening it, he read it
and let the tears just go. When he finished, he folded it up and shoved it into his pocket while taking something else out. Wrapping his hand behind my head, his mouth covered mine so hard, so hungry, and so desperate that I had allowed him into every inch of my body. Without leaving my mouth, he struggled with my hand to slip something cold onto my finger, my left ring finger. When he was done, he picked me up, wrapping my legs around his lean waist and just held me and giving me the breath that I needed to survive with and taking mine for his own.

Chapter 31

****Future****

Paul

Waiting this long was pure torture, but I had to. I had to wait no matter how many times that I threatened just to take her over my shoulder and haul her sweet ass down to the courthouse. I had to make her mine. Just as my dad had said in the letter that he had left me admitting that he was wrong and telling me to marry the one that I had truly loved, I was going to one way or another. The sooner, the better. But, I had to wait. I had to wait through the winter, through the spring, and for this summer day. I waited
, alright. Waited while making love to her every chance that I had. Night, day, in the barn, on a walk in the field, a few times on the way to and from the city. Today, I would make an honest woman out of her and marry her for the rest of my life and I knew that my dad would be right by my side, damn happy that I had his little girl, the one that he had protected with his life that night just for me.

The whole town had gathered at the ranch that beautiful summer day
, waiting, excited and just happy. As I waited in the barn impatiently, I watched out the door for any sign of her. Having Mr. Andrews walk her down the aisle made it just a perfect day. Almost. I just wished that my dad could have been here to walk her to me, to give her to me himself, but he was there. I could feel him.

Looking at Ben, I had to laugh. Mom had made him a bowtie also knowing there would be nothing that we could do to keep him from her wedding day. Not a damn thing. Why not just let him be a part of it? As my best man, he was going to do a damn good job
, too. Now, if Marc, being her man of honor, would dance with Ben when it had come time, it would make my day.

Marc, my poor brother who had gotten his heart broken, now was the one who just talked to Emmy, but never to me. I knew that it hurt him. He loved her and he had been so good to her, but her heart had always been mine. Becky had gone through that same thing with me. Only, she had realized it earlier. I think that he knew all along, though. He had to have.

Smoothing down Ben’s dark silver mane, I smiled at him. For once, I completely understood the crazy horse. He was just as crazy about her as I was.

“Can I talk to you?” Marc cleared his throat from the barn door and shoved his hands deep into his pockets.

“Hey, I’m glad that you decided to come.” That was the one thing that I hadn’t told Emmy. Even though he promised to be there, I knew that Marc might not show up. Hell, it had hurt him whenever she had mentioned anything about the wedding and I felt bad for him. I really did.

“I’m only here for Emmy. I couldn’t break her heart.” His eyes drifted over to Ben
, nodding in approval. “She will really like that.”

“What can I say
? He’s a part of her.”

“Listen…”

“Marc, thank you for being here. This means a lot to me, too. I couldn’t do this without you here.” Holding out my hand, I held my breath as his eyes sharpened on it. If he refused to shake my hand, I would go crazy. It was killing me not to have my brother, my best friend, any more. Not to count, to think that he had been the one to kiss her and hold her when she had needed it the most. I would never forget that, but a part of me was glad that he had been there with her while I was on the verge of taking my life down. At least it was my best friend who had the pleasure of having Emmy in his life. She was amazing and he had that for a little bit.

“I’m not here for you. The only reason why I am here is for her and only her.” Walking past me, he headed for the back where Rob and Will were sitting. Someday, his heart would mend.

“Marc, I can’t stand here and tell you that I am sorry that you had your heart broken. Actually I can, because I know how you feel, Brother. Boy, do I know how you feel. Emmer has been my life for so long. I can’t live without her and someday, you will meet someone like that.” Patting Ben’s neck, I straightened my shoulders and sucked in a deep breath. “I love you, Marc. You have always been my best friend, my brother. And if you are here just for her, then I just thank you for giving her that.”

“You have her,
Bro, so just go and marry her. I gave you that much, didn’t I?” His hurt poured through as he come back to me holding the bottle of whisky, the very bottle that I had finally set down to get my life back in order for my love. “Didn’t I give you that much?”

“I would have walked away if that was what she wanted.”

“Well, I knew what she really wanted, didn’t I?” Holding up the bottle, he motioned for Rob and Will to join us. “You screw her over and I will kill you.”

“I’m not going to screw her over. No way in hell.”

“I know that, too, Brother.” Bringing the bottle to his lips, he took a drink and bit back at the strong bite. “That’s shit, Man.”

Taking it, I nodded as I took a shot
, hissing at the burn. “We both need you here, but I understand if you decide to leave again.”

“Yeah, I think that I am just going to stay at the house with
Mom for a bit. Who knows, maybe I might find my Emmy. I do miss my family.” The tears filled in his eyes as he wrapped his arms around me, slapping me on the back. “Take damn good care of her, Paul. She’s so absolutely wonderful.”

“I need to get into this brotherly love.” Rob snatched the bottle and tipped it back. Letting out a growl, he wiped his mouth on his white sleeve. “Shit, that is good.” Passing it over to Will, he cocked his brow. “Why not, little brother? This is a great day.”

Taking it, Will took a shot, damn near puking afterward. “That’s horrible.”

“Let’s get you married,
Bro.” Marc looked at Ben and chuckled. “Damn horse.”

Walking out to the back yard that Mr. Andrews and
Mom had decorated up with flowers and the archway, I walked Ben to the front while hearing the town’s people laughing. Looking over at Marc, I swallowed hard as Becky had come down the aisle first in the long flowing royal blue dress. She smiled as she winked at me.

Marc cleared his throat as he stepped aside
, letting her move to the other side of him. Turning back to my mom, I watched her hurry down the aisle, taking her seat and trying to stop her tears. Turning around, she shrugged and jumped back up.

“Mom, what’s wrong?” The lump filled my throat
while seeing the hurt deep in her eyes.

“She’s just having a little bit of a hard time right now. Just hang on. She’s coming.” Her eyes shifted over to Marc
, causing him to follow her back down the aisle.

Looking over at Becky, I shrugged a little
knowing my heart was ready to explode in my chest if I didn’t marry Emmy soon. It had taken a little, but when the people all stood, the jitters hit my stomach as I couldn’t wait to see her. I wanted to see her so bad. And when I finally had seen that beautiful sight in that while strapless gown, showing her scars to everyone, I had just fallen in love with her all over again and even more. She was beautiful. Mom had flipped her shorter golden locks up mixing in some little white flowered bobby pins throughout and there wasn’t a spot of makeup on the scarred perfection of her face. Tears had gushed from her eyes as she held onto Mr. Andrews arm as tight as she could. With each step, more and more tears had come to her.

Marc came back
, taking his place and waiting for her as he wiped the tear from his eye. I knew what it was all about. I knew what the delay was. She was hurting. She was missing Jackson on the day that had meant everything to her and he hadn’t been here to walk her down the aisle himself. God, her heart was still so broken not having him here, but she was thankful for each day that she had shared with him. That pain would never go away, but someday it would get a little easier for her to get through. I am sure that the next big event in our lives, she would miss him even more. He may have been my blood, my dad, but he was the man that had given his life for her and she would never forget that.

When Mr. Andrews had given me her hand in honor of Jackson Huck, I almost lost it myself. I couldn’t even speak. I just shook his hand and collected my bride
, taking her right into my arms and letting her cry as hard as she wanted to, as hard as she could. God, I didn’t want to ever let her go. I couldn’t. I just held her to me while feeling that grief that was still so deep inside of her, pouring through her eyes and collecting her tears on my black tux jacket. I didn’t care. I loved it. I loved her even more that I could imagine.

The ceremony was long, watching those tears raining down her face every second
. I looked at her as she was barely able to slip the gold band on my finger. Marc reached around and caught it before it had fallen. Her glassy, red, and puffy eyes shifted over to him, thanking him quickly before she just stopped and held my hand. Pressing it to her chest, she closed her eyes and let a few more tears go.

“Thank you for giving me him, Jackson. Thank you for this.” When her eyes opened, her chin trembled and her eyes danced with the fresh wave of tears. Slipping the
ring on my finger, I reached up to cup her cheek and bring those beautiful aqua eyes to mine. Her hand rested on mine as she sniffled a little while just holding it here.

“You may kiss your bride
,” Pastor Don finally said after his whole passage and smiled.

Stepping closer to her, I smiled as I let her tears dampe
n my skin. “Emmerson Huck, I love you so very much and you have never looked more beautiful than you do right now.”

“You better just kiss me nice right now.” The little smile came through her tears as she reached up
to cup my cheek.

“Like hell I will kiss you nice, woman. I just made you all mine.” Grabbing hold of her, I pulled her tight to me and kissed her with everything that I had inside of me, everything that she had given me in my heart, I gave her too. God,
I didn’t want it to stop. I couldn’t let it stop.

The reception was nice and as I sat by Emmy, my fingers tangled in hers, I couldn’t be happier in my life. My mom had stood and given her speech
, of course making a few people cry, mostly Emmy. And when Mr. Andrew had stood he cleared his throat and forced a deep breath.

“I know that this would be where Jackson would say something and I…I hadn’t told anyone this, but he had come to see me a while back, in between our wonderful fights. He had looked at me and held up his hands,
and said ‘Truce for just a few minutes and then we can box, old man’. He had a letter that he wanted me to hang onto just in case if something ever happened to him. I would rather him be here reading it and me sitting in the back on a truce for this occasion. If it is alright, I would like to read this for my friend.” His eyes drifted over to me as I nodded, scooting closer to Emmy. Wrapping my arm around her shoulders, I kissed the top of her head and felt her cries shaking inside of her. Pulling out his reading glasses, he shook his head. “Damn, his handwriting.” Straightening his blue tie, he swallowed hard. “There may be a time in your life, my dearest Emmerson, that I will not be there to say these words to you. If I am not there on the most special day of your life, just know that I am watching over you and your husband will get his ass beat down every chance that I get. He not only stole my little girl away, but he has stolen her heart also. Emmy, there are so many things that I would like to say to you and I will because you are my special little girl, the special little girl that will always have my heart. No one will ever be good enough for you. My little angel who has been through so much in her life already—now I have to let another man take you away from me. God had brought you to us, to me, and I have done everything I possibly could to protect you.”

Her hand tightened on mine as she leaned into me. Reaching over, she grabbed hold of Marc’s hand
, causing his eyes to shift to me nervously. Smiling, I nodded in approval knowing that she would need the both of us while hearing those words that my dad had left her.

“I would give my life for you and if I ever had the chance to change it, I would do it all over again. When you were little, you had snuck out to Ben for comfort and you told me that he
knew the pain that you had deep inside of you. Well, Honey, so do I. I know what it was like to come from a home in which you had also. Maybe that was why I was so damn protective over you. I love you so much, Emmerson. So very much, and I know that it will hurt if I am not there on your special day. Just remember that I love you and cherished every day that I had you in my life.” His voice cracked a little as the cries poured from Emmy. God, it was just breaking my heart to see her crying like that, but I knew that she had just missed him still to this day and nothing would make our day any better than her tears. “You were a little spitfire and some days, I pulled my hair out while wondering how in the world a little girl could put me in my place as no others could. You are my weakness and I would never trade that in. I have sheltered you, sent you away thinking that I was protecting you, when I had been nothing but a fool about it. I was wrong to be that overbearing with you and I can’t say that I would change it. Seeing you so hurt inside and out, I wasn’t going to allow a man to ever hurt you again, not as long as I could help it.

His eyes shifted a little as he took a moment to pull back his tears. “This is your special day, Emmy. My little Emmy is no longer a little girl, but a beautiful woman. I will always be in your heart
, Emmy, as you are always in mine. On the day that you marry your best friend, I want you to know that I have seen where I had gone wrong on trying to keep you apart. Truth is: I couldn’t be happier knowing that you are marrying my son. Seeing his deep love for you, I know this is the right thing to do and I want you to look at him every day and love him with all your heart like I know that you do already. And Paul, I couldn’t think of anyone better for my little girl to marry and to love. I just hope that fool of an old man you call your dad doesn’t do anything more to keep you two apart. Take her hand on your special day and hold that hand tight to your heart for me. Love her and cherish her because she is really something special….. And Ben, stay out of the house.”