Dark Grace (5 page)

“Hey Zoe, sleep well?”

I nodded.
“Think it’ll be any good?” I asked, gesturing toward the bird.

“Hope so.”

The eagle was occasionally dripping grease onto the flames, causing them to flare. Evening was quickly making its claim on the day and the heat from the fire was inviting. I began to wonder if the rest of our group was ok. They were always home before dark. I sat on my favorite fire-side log and watched the constantly changing colors and patterns of flames. It quickly brought back memories of watching our cabin burn down.

“You ok, Zoe?” asked Gus.

I looked up. “Yeah. The fire just reminded me of the cabin burning.”

We both turned when we heard the chattering of our companions.
I stood instantly.

“They’re back!” I announced, even though I knew Gus was already aware.

Susan was the first to come into view, holding the hands of both Abbey and Jane. The girls were animated and seemed excited. Nathan was directly behind them, and Emilie and Boggs were trailing behind just a bit.

“We’re back!” shouted Jane.
“We’re back back back!” she sang, followed with a giggle. “Look at Boggs’ shiner!”

I found Boggs’ face, and true to Jane’s word he had a big black eye.

“Boggs!” I said, maybe a bit too dramatically. “What happened?”

“Fucking dead bastards,” he mumbled.

Gus was right behind me, and I could feel his tension. “Boggs? You got attacked?”

“He sure did,” answered Nathan.

“One of the mother fuckers jumped me.”

“Don’t worry, Boggs is fine,” said Emilie.
“Nathan took a swing at the Roamer. He hit Boggs on accident when it suddenly moved out of the way.”

“What happened to the Roamer?” asked Gus.

“I shot it,” said Em, a huge grin plastered on her pixie-like freckled face.

“The son of a bitch climbed right out of a sunken stairwell like a fucking two hundred pound rat,” Boggs said.
His ego seemed wounded. “I didn’t even hear it coming.”

I was already next to Boggs, and I wrapped my arms around him.
“I’m glad you’re ok,” I whispered gently.

It took Boggs a moment before he returned the embrace.
Once he did, I kept the side of my face against Boggs’ chest but turned my head and found Nathan. “You too, Nate, glad you’re ok.”

He nodded once.
“Thanks, Zoe.”

Jane was giddy, jumping up and down like she had ants in her pants.
“We found a house!” she squealed.

“Jane, hush!” scolded Abbey.
“We weren’t going to tell them yet!”

“What’s going on, guys?” asked Gus.

Susan had stepped closer to the fire and answered. “We headed northeast for a while and found a lighthouse. It looks like it could be perfect.” She was grinning.

“Did you check it out?”

“We did,” answered Nathan. “Well, we made Susan stay on board with the girls. But yeah, that’s where we ran into our little Crawler.”

Boggs was still holding me, and I was glad.

“Only hitch is a bridge,” said Boggs. His voice sounded deeper than usual with my ear against his chest.

“What’s that?” asked Jane.
She was pointing to the eagle roasting over the fire.

“That, Jane, is a really big chicken!” said Gus, his face very serious.

“A chicken?” asked Em skeptically.

“Uh huh,” he said with a wink.
It made me smile.

“Where’d you get a chicken?” asked Boggs.
I nudged him to try to stop the questions. He leaned down and kissed me softly on my temple.

“We have some crab too,” I said.

“We brought back some goodies as well,” said Susan. She seemed giddy.

“Let’s get dinner going and we can talk about what we found today,” said Emilie.
“We have instant mashed potatoes. The really yummy kind with sour cream and onions. And packets of gravy!”

“And we got cans of cranberry sauce!” added Abbey.

“And carrots and corn!” squealed Jane.

Boggs let go of me, but found my hand and took it in his own.
It felt good. I looked up at him and felt guilty. He was looking forward. His eye was swollen and deeply bruised. I found myself wishing I could help. We walked toward the fire together, where Emilie was unpacking a backpack. My stomach started growling when I saw all of the cans of food.

“Zoe, do you want to help us make dinner?” asked Susan.

“Yes!” My gloomy mood from the day before was gone, and it felt good to have all of us together again. I looked up to Boggs, who still stood by my side. “Can I get you anything, Boggs?”

He shook his head at me.
“Nah, I’ll be fine, Zo. Thanks though.”

“I have what he needs right here,” said Susan.
She was holding up a large bottle of whiskey. “Compliments of the lighthouse.”

“What’s that?” asked Jane.

“Oh, Jane-Bug, that’s not for kids,” said Nathan in the calm voice he’d grown to use with her. “It’s called whiskey and it’s only for grownups, ok?”

Little Jane nodded to him.
“Ok. But can I still have chicken and cranberry sauce?”

Nathan and Susan both chuckled.
“Course you can, baby girl,” said Nate. “Just no whiskey.”

“Ok.”

“That goes for you too Abbey,” said Susan.

“Duh,” said the preteen.
She then smiled at Susan, who rolled her eyes dramatically.

“Boggs, I’m gonna go help make some grub,” I said.

He leaned down and kissed me on the cheek. “Thank you,” he whispered. His words seemed to hold meaning beyond just being grateful for supper.

I walked to the folding table where Emilie was busy opening cans.
She was mixing the canned carrots and corn together into the same pot. If no one else had been near, I probably would have sat down and eaten half of them by myself - cold.

“Want me to work on the potatoes?” I asked.

“Sure,” said Em. “I can hardly wait to tell you and Gus all about what we found today.”

“Me too.”

Susan walked up behind me. “Emilie, are you good with all the canned stuff? Should I make the gravy?”

“Sure,” said Em.
“That’d be great.”

“So, Zoe,” asked Susan.
“What’s the bird?”

I smiled at her.
“Bald Eagle.”

“Gross,” she replied.

“Gus shot it,” I explained. “Em, he was like a little kid. You should have seen him.”

“Boys and their guns,” said Susan with a hint of humor in her voice.

I looked over and saw Abbey and Jane sitting fire-side, watching while Gus and Nathan worked at taking the bird off of the fire.

“Make sure you don’t tell the kids,” said Emilie.
“Or they might not eat it.”

“Right,” agreed Susan.
“Maybe it’ll be good. Anyway, I’m glad to have the meat even if it just ‘tastes like chicken.’”

“We have four crabs too,” I added.

Emilie got a huge grin on her face. “Yummy!”

“Ok girls, I’m gonna go boil water for the potatoes.
See ya in a few,” I said. I picked up a pot of water I had gotten ready and walked toward the fire.

“Here, Zo, I’ll get that,” said Boggs.
He took the pot from me and nestled it over the fire.

“Thanks,” I said with a small smile that followed.

“We’re almost ready here,” said Gus. “The bird looks gorgeous!”

Nathan and Gus had managed to carve the bird and it now sat on a plate in bits and pieces.
Emilie walked over with the vegetables and Boggs took that pot as well, nestling it next to the water to warm them.

“I’m hungry,” whined Jane.

“It’ll be ready soon, Tadpole,” Nathan assured her. “I’ll go open up your cranberry sauce.”

I walked over and collected the crab, arranging them on a plate.
There were eight halves, plus the lone claw. By the time I was back to the fire with them, Nathan was removing the pot of water for the mashed potatoes and Susan was waiting with the instant potato flakes.

“Ready!” called Gus.

Everyone seemed excited. It was refreshing and I found my mood was lifting even higher.

“Ok, Zoe, since you caught the crabs you get
dibbs on the claw,” chuckled Gus. He walked over to me, set the claw on one of our log seats, and cracked it open with a small stone. “Open up,” he ordered. He was holding a clump of white crab meat, and I decided to humor him by opening my mouth. He stuck it in gently, meeting my eyes with his just long enough to make my heart skip a beat.

“Mmm,” I moaned.
“Oh my God that’s so good.”

Gus winked at me, then handed me the rest of the claw.

“Girls, come get it,” sang Susan.

“Me
me me me me!” chanted Jane.

I watched as everyone else began filling their plates, and sat back enjoying my crab claw.
I had never enjoyed being first in line at buffets. I hated feeling rushed and bumping into people. Before long Jane and Abbey were back by the fire chattering excitedly with each other while they ate.

Boggs walked up beside me and handed me a plate of food.

“Boggs, thanks!” I said, grateful for the gesture. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“I know, but I wanted to.
Can I sit?” He gestured toward the empty spot beside me.

I nodded.
He sat beside me, facing the fire, and as everyone else began doing the same, we began eating. The eagle tasted gamey, but was overall a wonderful treat. I ended up mixing bits of meat in with the potatoes and gravy to mask the wild, almost fishy, flavor of the bird. The fire was warm, the mood upbeat, the food an extra special treat, and I was almost able to forget that death surrounded our oasis.

I was full before the food on my plate was gone.
None of us were used to eating that heavy of a meal anymore, and I could see my companions all slowing as well. Jane seemed to be the only one still eating eagerly. She was so skinny, and it made me glad to see her filling her belly. The fire was crackling, the flames lapping at the air around it. The night sky was full-dark now. I looked up to the stars. They were brilliant with their dark backdrop. A bat swooped down after its own insect meal. Gus’ voice brought me out of my little moment.

“Ok, tell us about this lighthouse.”

“It looks awesome, Gus,” said Nathan, his mouth still full. “Old, but solid. It’s about a two hour boat ride from here. Biggest issue is a small bridge that leads to it from the mainland. If we can get some explosives, we should be able to blow it.”

“It was pretty cool,” said Emilie with a smile.
“It’s sparse, but clean inside. The only thing dead was the Roamer that went after Boggs. And there’s a great place for a big garden!”

“It’s got enough room for all of us,” said Boggs.
He smiled down at me and I happily smiled back.

“Sounds awesome,” I said.
I placed my hand over my belly, the baby inside doing flips. In the span of just two days the feelings of movement were considerably stronger.

“Did you guys happen to find any of the equipment I asked for?” asked Gus.

“No, sorry,” said Boggs. “Not so much as a pharmacy or doctor’s office.”

I noticed a small sigh from Gus.

“Ok, girls,” said Susan. “Time for bed.”

“Aw,” whined Jane.
“Not yet!”

“Susan’s right, Jane.
It’s been a long day,” Nate said, backing Susan. “We’ll have fun tomorrow, ok?”

“Ok,” said the little red-head, with a hint of moping in her voice.

“Be sure to pee and brush your teeth, girls, ok?” added Susan.

“We will,” said Abbey.

Both girls got up and walked off to the kitchen table, where we kept the toothbrushes and toothpaste. They knew the routine well and we adults were able to focus on the fire and conversation. The bottle of whiskey was being passed around. Gus actually held it out to me, which I found an ominous sign. I passed, knowing it wasn't good for the baby even under normal circumstances. I made note that Nathan also let the bottle pass him by. As we chatted excitedly about the day’s activities and the lighthouse, I leaned against Boggs and mostly listened.

The others were clearly feeling the effects of the alcohol.
The laughter and silliness was a nice change. As nice as it was being close to Boggs again, I felt a pang in my heart when I saw Emilie clinging to Gus and him returning the affection. Before long I excused myself and joined the girls in the shelter. I could tell by their breathing that they were both asleep. I stripped out of the bulk of my clothes and slipped into Boggs’ bed. It felt like we were back to a point where we could at least share a bed again. I lay there, listening to the laughter of the others, and eventually fell asleep.