Concealed Attractions (Cedar Island Tales) (42 page)

“He won’t be. Mom said she wo
n
’t let him come back unless he’
s nice to me
and the baby.”

Ben looked down at his shoes
,
then at
Danni
as she
turned away from him and
began taking dishes out of the cupboard.
After a long silence broken only by the sounds of her opening and closing the refrigerator door, he asked,
“W
here does that leave me
after you go home
?”

“You can stay
here
.
” Her voice shook.
“
Mom wants me back and I want to
go home
—
to be
with
her
. She deserv
es to get to know her grandbaby,
eve
n if you don’t think she should.
”

“You know t
hat’s not what I meant.
” When
Danni
was
within range, he reached out and touched her shoulder.
“
W
hat if your d
ad
come
s
home
? You know, s
urprises you
and your mom
?
”

She whirled around at his touch.
“He hasn’t, and he isn’t
, and he won’t.
Mom told me he’s got permanent
work
in Tacoma and he won’t be home for months
and months.
If
I’m
home, it’ll be easier for her when I go back to school. I don’t want to discuss it
anymore
. Besides, after the baby comes,
after the baby—” she ch
ok
ed
on her words, on her fear that Ben wouldn’t contradict her
, “you won’t have to worry
about him
,
you won’t have to worry
about
the Bump
.
”

She couldn’t let him see how scared she was that he
really
wouldn’t want to be with her
after the baby came. If she went home, she wouldn’t have to face that
. It
was getting closer to the time when he would be leaving in May
,
anyway,
so did it really
matt
er?

Her
heart clutched
that
she’d never see him again after he
went back to school
. Maybe she should just assume he’d be her friend until then and
,
when he left, it would
all
be over between them
.
She bit her lower lip
so hard it brought tears to her eyes, which she swiped angrily off her cheeks.

“But i
t’s not just the baby
I worry about,
Danni
. Don’t you know that?
”
He stopped talking when she
looked
at him
, her chin quivering
.

Finally, s
he said,
her voice softer
but
still
insistent.
“I’d like to stay here
with you
, but you’re leavin
g anyway.
If I go home it
’ll make
things
easier.
For both of us.
It’ll
be
simpler
.
”

“
Danni
, p
lease.
Hear me out.
”
He looked like he was going to hug her and she
knew she
wouldn’t be able to hold back her tears if he did.

She couldn’t trust herself anymore. Her feelings were too raw, too close to the surface.
“I don’t want to discuss it anymore!
We’ve done enough talking.” She went into
her
bedroom and started to get undress
ed. “I’m tired,
I’m going to bed.”

“But,
Danni
.”

“No, no more talking.”
She shut the
bedroom
door.
Danni
sat on the bed trying to clear the thoughts rocketing in her brain. She dared not
wish or hope that he might
still want to see her, to be wi
th her after the baby arrived. It would be b
etter not to stay with him
, better not
to
set herself up to
be hurt again.
Doctor Wright had said he cared. But did he really? About her and not just the baby?

A
few minutes later
, he approached her closed bedroom door and announced,
“I’m going for a walk.”

Danni took a shower then wrapped
a towel
around her head
,
after
drap
ing
a sweater
around her shoulders on
top of her nightgown.  She
entered the living room. Ben
’s walk must have been short. He
was slumped on the couch looking at the ceiling. She
pulled the towel off her hair
and sat down in front of the fireplace
to
allow
the heat
to
warm
her back
as she combed her hair dry.

Ben
slid off the couch
and tentatively rubbed her back
. “I’m
not going to ask you
again.
I know I put you in a bad
position, asking you to choose.
I just want you to be safe. That’s all.”

“
Is my hair dry?”

He
ran his hand lightly from the crown of her head down to the end of her nearly waist-long tresses
. “Not quite. Give me the comb,” and he moved it through her
hair
, scooting
closer
to support her back as h
e did so.  “Move a bit this way.
”

After he handed her the comb, s
he leaned
against his chest.
His
hands came around to encircle her
thickened body
.

She placed her hands on top of his as he gently stroked her rounded belly.
“I’m sorry I was mean
to you
, Ben.”

“Apology accepted.”
He kissed her cheek.
She was hoping he’d do more when they
each started
at
a loud thud
that sounded
outside
the kitchen window
.

“Sounds like that raccoon is back
trying to get
into the garbage,
”
Ben concluded.

“I thought you put a big rock on top of the can.”

“I did, but those critters are very good at getting into things.
” H
e
kissed her neck.  “Your hair is dry
now
.”

“Good.” But s
he made no effort to move away from him. It felt good being with him
, his arms around her
.
If only he would be here forever like this.
If only he didn’t have to leave in May.

Ben helped her off the floor. “Let me
see what
the raccoon did.
If you want,
I’ll
give you a
back
rub
.”

“
Okay
.
”
She
wandered into the bedroom
,
climbed into bed, and lay
down
, rubbing her abdomen as the baby moved within.

“When are you going to
be born
? I wish I knew what you wer
e, and what color hair you have,
or will you be bald, like I was,” she whispered. “Ben
love
s you, I know he does.
You probably know it, too—the way he talks to you when he waits for you to kick his hand.
I
just don’t know if he
love
s me,
for me alone
, just for me
, or if he will when he thinks I don’t need him after you’re born
.
”
Tears
squeezed out of the corner
s
of
her
eye
s
as she
imagined how hard it was going to be to say good-bye to him
.

She
was
barely awak
e when
Ben
climbed into bed next to her and
circled
her shoulders
with one arm
as he kissed her
cheek
good
night.

The next day, Ben
picked up the rock he had placed on the top of the garbage can
the night before
and
s
potted
footprints in the dirt near the kitchen window.
Not
as large as
his footprints
and way bigger than
Danni’s. He walked around the house.
On the far side
of the house
nearest the trees
, he discovered more prints,
this time in the mud below the windows of the two bedrooms
.
H
e followed them until
they disappeared
in
the direction of
the mossy ground between the trees.
If it was her father, had he seen
Ben
, too? Would he think the worst and try to hurt
Danni
?
Ben’s
pulse
climbed
as he considered the possibilities
.

After
he drove Danni to
the clinic
that morning
,
Ben
went into the back room
, pulled out his cell phone
and closed the door.

“Mrs.
Kelly
?”

“Call me
Anna, Ben. We’re almost family.
”

He acknowledged her comment with a shrug she couldn’t see and plunged ahead with his news.
“
I called because s
o
meone
’s been walking
around the cottage
. Has your husband been
home
?”

At first, she said nothing.
“He works Mond
ay through Friday and sometimes
Saturdays
, but he has Sunday off, so it’s possible.
But
I didn’
t see him yesterday. What did you find?”

“J
ust footprints
.”

“Would you like me to ask him?”

“
I don’t think
so
.
I didn’t say anything to
Danni
.
I
don’t want to upset her, but I thought
I should call you
.
If he says anything to you, will you
let
me
know
?”

“
Of course
.”

Chapter 1
2

Ben watched Danni for several minutes.
“
What are you
doing?”

“I’m f
olding the towels
, silly
.”

“
When did Angela say you were due?”

“
Around
March
tenth
.”

“H
m
m.
I
t
’s only February second. That’s
a
whole
month away.” He smiled. “
I’d have figured you
closer
to your due date.
You remind me of
Julie
,
cleaning and moving
things around every night for the past week.
Y
ou’re nesting.
New mama
s do that when they’
re getting ready for the
ir babies
.
Hasn’t
Angela
mentioned it
?”