Claire's Song (31 page)
Authors: Ashley King
The bullying seems to have leveled off at school since neither of us pays any attention to it and Mrs. Weathersby, I'm pretty sure, has stepped in. She won't say, but I get the feeling.
Ryder comes swaggering backstage, that cocky smile plastered on his face, his shaggy hair matted to his forehead with sweat and I think he's never looked sexier than he does at this moment. His black t-shirt stretches across his chest and hugs his biceps; his destroyed jeans hug his hips and ahem, butt, perfectly. He looks like a legit rock star, but really, I think he looks like the Ryder he always was. Mine.
"What did you think?" He asks with a smile as he wraps his arms around me. His eyes are bright and full of life, a nice change from the deadness that used to inhabit them.
"I thought it was pretty awesome and that the singer was pretty hot," I laugh as he leans in to kiss me. Each time his lips touch mine I go insane, my knees go weak, and I get goosebumps, the full nine. My body responds and I move closer to him, our bodies twisting together, until finally someone walks by and tells us to get a room.
We both laugh and it feels so good, so natural a thing for us to do. I sigh gladly against his lips as Ryder's hand traces a path down my cheek and then he holds it gently as he leans in for another, softer kiss.
"I got something for you," he says, his mouth tilted up in a smile.
"Really? I'm intrigued." I step back from him and watch him disappear into a tiny room and then come back with a huge box.
"I know we're hanging out tomorrow with our families and all that, but I wanted to give this to you now, just the two of us," he says as he places the box down in front of me. I kneel on the floor and eye the box, the colorful wrapping paper and the card taped to the front. I look up at Ryder and he just nods and looks anxious.
"Ryder Andrews is nervous?" I joke as I pluck the card from the box. I take my time opening it, my eyes never leaving his. He shrugs with a smile and then kneels down next to me.
"Read the card later, maybe when you get home," he whispers into my hair, shivers following in its wake.
I look down at the front of the card, a puppy rocking a Santa hat on it, and I nod. I put it back in the envelope and slide it into my purse. Carefully I unwrap the box, which gives nothing away. It's taped shut pretty good, but I manage to use my fingernail to open it. When I flip back the lid, I'm speechless. Absolutely speechless. My heart is in my throat and tears start to well up behind my eyes, happy, completely and utterly happy tears.
"Ryder," I gasp as I throw my arms around him, hugging him as tight as I can, trying somehow let him know how very perfect this gift is.
"You like it?" He laughs into my hair, his hands running through its longer strands.
I nod and pull away from him, "It's perfect, Ryder. Thank you so much, thank you."
I'm crying as I give him a kiss and then lift my gift out of the box. It's a Crosley record player with Run DMC's
Raising Hell
record, which has one of my all time favorite songs, "It's Tricky" on it. Ryder remembered my story about Jamie and he knew how much I still wanted this. Now I can play both of the records they got for me.
"This is really too much," I say as I caress the record player like a new pet.
Ryder laughs and runs a hand through his hair, "For you, it's never too much."
Somehow he manages to get me to put it back into the box and we walk out to my car. It's days like these that I miss living together, but I'm glad that he's getting along with his Dad, that things are finally working out. Life's funny that way. There are often storms, storms that seem to last too long, but they pass, and when they do, the sky is always brighter, clearer, better, the wind having brought new things and new people into your life.
Ryder puts the box in the car and moves in front of me. His hands cage me in, one on each side of my body as I lean back against the car. He gives me a wicked grin, one that melts hearts, as he leans in close.
"Merry Christmas, Claire," he whispers in my ear and then his lips are on mine, soft and careful at first, but then faster, better, perfect.
My arms are around his neck, my legs itching to jump around his waist, but somehow, we both manage chill out and step back from each other.
Ryder's breathing is heavy and his eyes are hooded when he looks at me. "You are going to get me into some serious trouble," he smiles.
I can't help but laugh and respond in my most sultry voice, "Maybe I want too."
He shakes his head as he grabs my face between his hands and gives me the best goodbye kiss I've ever been given before we go our separate ways.
It's not until later that night when I'm in my room, vegging out amongst all the photos of Ryder and me, my parents, and Jamie, with Snow Patrol's "You're All I Have" playing on my new record player, that I dig the bright red envelope from my purse. The puppy on the front in the Santa hat is so cute that I study it for a minute. This Christmas is better than I thought it would be. I thought it would be hard without Jamie, and it's not easy, things without him never are, but I'm learning to deal with it, learning how to let others help me deal with it. And I've got Ryder, Ryder who loves me, Ryder who is back amongst the living.
Slowly, I open the card, and read Ryder's words.
Claire,
These past few months have been the craziest and the best of my life. Meeting you was nothing short of fate, because I think you were sent to help me, to make sure I gave this whole living thing a chance, because you see, I wasn't really (living that is). I let other people and their words, their choices, their actions dictate my life and that's not living. Living is when you are free, when you hold someone's hand, when you play a song on the guitar, when you listen to your favorite song play like a soundtrack to your life, riding with the windows down with the most beautiful girl next to you. That's living and that's what I intend to do every day from here on out and I intend to do it with you by my side. I love you more than you'll ever know and crazy as it may seem, you're perfect for me. You make the chaos normal, make the normal seem amazing, extraordinary. That's you, Claire. Everything about you is that way. So I want to tell you thank you, thank you for taking a chance on me, for not giving up on me, for loving me when no one else would. I love you for it and I love you because you are the most amazing girl in this crazy thing we call life. Jamie is proud of you, I know, because I sure know I am.
I love you,
Ryder
Happy tears are streaming down my cheeks as I re-read the card and my smile widens. His words are beautiful and they reach deep down in my soul. And that’s why we're perfect for each other, why this life, no matter how imperfect it may seem, is perfect. I clutch the card to my chest as I walk over to my dresser and stand it up there amongst Jamie, me, Ryder. And I know without a doubt that Jamie is looking down on me right now, happy that I've found love, but most importantly, that I've found life.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Writing is something that I love to do and I thank God for allowing me to do that, for giving me this precious gift and giving me readers who enjoy what I write!
A huge thanks to my own rock star, my drummer husband who always helps me work through plots, gives me ideas, helps me edit, and takes care of the dishes when I need to write a scene or two. I love you so much boo and thank God for you every single day!
Thank you to my second parents, Philip and Teresa King. You guys have treated me like your own and have always had my back, always inspiring and encouraging me. I love you both very much and am thankful for you!
Thank you to Bonnie Ritch, who helped me with edits, who encouraged and supported me as I wrote this. She sees what I do, and she understands how important it is to stop the bullying! Also, thank you to Lori Taylor who always reads what I write and is always excited about it. Thank you for each Facebook share, for each email, for everything! Thank you Candace Smith, because you were a supporter from day one with Brightest Hour, pushing the book and reviewing it. That will always mean so much to me.
Thank you to Michelle Skerratt. You always are so excited about each book that comes out and I cannot tell you how much it means to me. I will never forget how much you helped get “Brightest Hour” out there and I really wanted to take the time to thank you for that!
Thank you to all of my readers, to every single supporter, to each and every person who reads what I’ve written, who has taken the time to tell me their thoughts. I truly appreciate it and I enjoy hearing what you think! Without you, I’d be writing for ghosts!
Students, people of all ages, bullying is real. This is not some small time thing we see in the movies. This is real and I have witnessed the effects of it on some dear students of mine, which led to me to write this book. Know that your words carry more weight than you realize and understand that every one is going through something. Be kind, because that is what being human is all about.
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