Calming the Rush of Panic (18 page)

1. Breathe mindfully for several breaths to remain steady and present for the unfolding experience of now. Let yourself soften and open to noticing every small aspect of each breath: the in, the out, the rise, the fall, of each inhale and exhale.
   
2. Set your intentions for this practice. Speak kindly, quietly, and reassuringly to the hurt part of yourself that carries the heavy burden of your panic-ridden life:
   

   May I embrace my panic as a gift so that it will reveal to me what is fueling these panicky feelings. May I embrace my panic so that it will give me deeper insight and wisdom into the panic and set me free.
   

   May I embrace my panic as a gift that is teaching me to be more compassionate and empathetic to others and myself.
   

   May I embrace my panic as a gift that I have harnessed and redirected into creative outlets, such as arts and crafts, gardening, exercise, or
   ___________(fill in the blank).
   

   May I embrace my panic as a gift that allows me to be rich with a vast array of feelings and emotions.
   

   May I embrace my panic as a gift that has taught me to be a wise, careful, and cautious parent, caretaker, teacher, businessperson, or
   ___________(fill in the blank).
   

   May I embrace my panic as a gift that gives me a deeper appreciation and understanding of the complexity of life.
   

   May I embrace my panic as a gift that
   ___________(fill in the blank).
   

3. Slowly follow your breath and congratulate yourself for taking this time to acknowledge a few of the positive things that panic has taught you.
   

When the voice of criticism starts putting you down, take a mindful moment to reflect on the positive lessons that you’ve taken with you from your experience of panic. Feel free to write these blessings on a piece of paper and hang it on your fridge or desk, as loving reminders that panic is more than it seems. Panic can be your teacher, a guide that can lead you to learn more about your strengths and beauty within.

Balance and Joy

It can be challenging to bring mindfulness into your busy workday. If you do get a few minutes to yourself, you may have only enough time to grab a bite to eat before you’re rushing back to the next pressing deadline or commitment. Perhaps this is all the more reason to consider incorporating a few mindful minutes of a self-inquiry R.A.I.N. practice into your daily grind in order to harvest the fruits of balance and joy. This next mindful moment will bring you closer to what you value most in life, to what really matters to you beyond your panic.

1. Start by bringing your full attention to your breath. Each breath is a bridge that links you to the present moment. Be with each breath, following your breathing pattern as you inhale and exhale, without trying to change or alter it in any way. Let each breath unfold, and notice the physical manifestations of your breathing in your body. Do this for at least three to five breaths.
   
2. Stay with your breath and begin to
   recognize
   when a strong thought or feeling occurs. Notice what comes up when you focus on your mind and body.
   
3. Take this moment to
   allow and acknowledge
   the mental and emotional storm that is occurring. You can’t always ascertain what caused your panic or why you feel what you feel, but you can recognize and acknowledge the symptoms. You might feel light-headed, you might feel a trembling in your body, and you might even feel dizzy. You might feel frightened, anxious, and overwhelmed. This is what panic feels like at times. It’s okay. Panic happens.
   
4. Investigate,
   with detachment and clarity, just the facts. How are these thoughts and feelings affecting your mind and body in this moment? Become a detective and observe how thoughts appear and disappear, how feelings are critical one moment and almost unnoticeable the next. Maybe you feel acute discomfort in one part of your body, then it fades.
   
5. Take this next moment to bring to mind what you value most in your life. It could be your family, friendship, work, good health, good grades, happiness, safety, love, laugher, or helping others. What are your core values? Pause to reflect on your mental list of what you value. What thoughts and feelings come up when you consider what is most important to you? You may notice that what you value most connects you more intimately with what gives you pleasure or feeds your soul or gives your life more meaning and purpose. What you value ties in directly with your joy, and more joy helps balance you when you feel out of balance due to panicky thoughts. Joy and balance are within you each time you return to your highest values.
   
6. The final step is
   non-identifying
   , or not taking your thoughts and feelings personally. For example, when you call a friend and he announces, “I can’t talk. I’m heading into a conference with my boss. Sorry, need to run,” you know that your friend would talk if he could, and it’s not that he doesn’t want to talk to you—so you don’t take it personally. With non-identifying, you’re essentially saying to yourself:
   Panic is being experienced. That’s all it is. I don’t need to fix it or repress it or change myself. It has little to do with me.
   As you practice non-identifying, you will begin to challenge the very foundation of panic. You will open yourself to the possibility of deeper understanding and acceptance.
   
7. Maybe the old way of pushing panic away isn’t the healthiest or most reliable way of coping. By introducing mindful awareness into your core values, you will discover another way of living, beyond your panic and experiencing greater joy and balance in your everyday life.
   

Compassion

Can you think back on a time that you shared an intimate moment with someone you love? It could be the last time you sang a lullaby for your child to fall asleep in your arms. It might be the last time you made love to your partner or spouse. Or maybe it was a heart-expansive talk with an old friend whom you cherish and trust. When you hold that loving memory in your mind, how does it make you feel? We bet you feel loved, appreciated, and bursting with compassion and empathy. If only the feeling of open-heartedness would last, you might lament. Well, it can. The following practice, a version of loving-kindness meditation, is remarkable for strengthening feelings of kindness and compassion by actively wishing yourself and others happiness or well-being.

This particular meditation is based on specific phrases of well-wishing; these are provided for you, but feel free to select your own phrases that resonate warmly with your heart. If you’ve picked up this book in the middle of a panic attack, you may be riding the waves of a raging heartbeat, obsessive thoughts, and feelings of dread. This meditation will also help you transform and find healing in many panicky situations.

1. Find a comfortable seated position—or lie down, if you prefer, as long as you can stay awake and attentive. Bring your attention to your breath, and breathe mindfully for a minute or two.
   
2. Focus on the emotions in your heart. Notice any feelings or sensations that you are having in your heart space. Let them flow freely, kindly accepting whatever issues forth.
   
3. You may notice that you do not feel loving or happy or content, especially at first. That is okay. If you feel sad, angry, or resentful, this is perfectly normal and acceptable. These opposite feelings likely reflect times when your painful feelings were repressed—forced into hiding—and you held back from loving-kindness. Simply let the feelings be, gently accepting whatever is released.
   
4. Allow yourself to open to the good as well, and accept any emotions or thoughts of kindness and open-heartedness. If necessary, you may recollect a warm embrace with someone you care about, or a love note or e-mail, or the love expressed in the eyes of your child. Let the kind remembrances of sensations and feelings wash over you, filling you with as much love and support as possible.
   
5. Shift your focus to yourself. You will be speaking directly to the part of yourself that is anxious, fearful, or injured or otherwise needs special attention right now. Remember to speak with kindness and compassion, wishing wellness for yourself. Use the following phrases or make up your own:
   

   May I be safe.
   

   May I be happy.
   

   May I be healthy and well.
   

   May I live with peace and ease in my mind and body.
   

6. Return to your breath. With each inhale, a radiant, soothing light of loving-kindness is filling your entire being. With each exhale, you may now extend your vibrant light of loving-kindness to one or more people who have helped guide you in generous and loving ways. Keep this person or these people in mind as you repeat the phrases:
   

   May you be safe.
   

   May you be happy.
   

   May you be healthy and well.
   

   May you live with peace and ease in your mind and body.
   

7. Again, return to your breath and connect with this present moment. With each breath, in and out, you now gradually expand your light of loving-kindness to others who also struggle with panic. You don’t need to know these people personally or even know their names; just extend compassion to all the people right now who live with panic on a daily basis. You are simply wishing others, far and wide, the same relief and ease that you wish for yourself. Breathe mindfully for a few breaths and repeat the phrases below.
   

   May all those who suffer with panic be safe.
   

   May all those who suffer with panic be happy.
   

   May all those who suffer with panic be healthy and well.
   

   May all those who suffer with panic live with peace and ease in their mind and body.
   

8. Remember to greet with compassion and nonjudgment whatever comes forward inside you. May loving-kindness burn brightly in your heart, shedding its comforting light on everyone in your life and the world.
   

Sacredness

Nature provides an excellent backdrop for a “web of life” meditation using all of your senses, and it can offer access to your innate healing and transformative powers to reduce any panicky thoughts, feelings, and sensations that you might be experiencing at the time. This next practice is also a reminder of the sacredness of all life.

If you can head out to the woods or countryside or the ocean for this meditation, do so. You can also imagine that you’re out at one of your favorite spots in nature and conjure the things that you love and remember about that place. Otherwise, your backyard, a park, or somewhere with a view of nature will work.

You are welcome to sit, stand, or lie down, maintaining alertness and awareness of your mind and body.

1. Take a few mindful belly breaths and then follow the natural progression of your breathing—the pattern and rhythm of each inhale and each exhale.
   
2. Open to your sense of sight. Pay attention to every little detail you see around you. Notice gradations of color and variations in shapes. Notice textures and surfaces—the ridges on the tree trunks, the rays of sunlight peering through the branches, the leaves gathered in piles, the clumps of dirt beneath your shoes. Tap into your peripheral vision to the left and right and focus on one particular object. What are you noticing now? Remember to breathe and simply watch.
   
3. You may experience some doubt about this practice, like a little voice that tells you,
   Forget this practice—it won’t be able to help you with your panic.
   Simply allow this thought to be. Recognize the doubt, acknowledge it, welcome it into your meditation, and then let it be. There’s no need to push doubt away or resist it. Your doubt is just a friend traveling in the other direction whom you pass on the trail.
   
4. Shift your focus to sounds. Take this moment to pay attention to everything you can hear. Simply observe the coming and going of sounds. You may hear the sound of a lawn mower or a rush of water from a creek. In many ways there is little difference between these sounds. All sound is just an auditory phenomenon, or things you can hear. Only your mind attaches value to distinguish between good and bad sounds. Remember to breathe mindfully and listen.
   
5. Take this next moment to pay attention to your sense of touch. What do you notice immediately that you can feel with your body? You may notice that your hands feel warm but your face is cool from a breeze. You may notice any pain or tension stored up in your body. This is just your body asking you to pay attention to it. What do you feel just beneath your fingertips? Breathe mindfully and feel.
   
6. Begin to awaken to your sense of taste. Draw attention to your mouth, tongue, and saliva. Did you have a coffee or tea today? Is the essence of your last meal still present in your mouth? Breathe mindfully and acknowledge what you taste in this moment.
   
7. Leaving taste behind, gently shift your focus to your sense of smell. What aromas stand out to you? You may notice smells that you find unpleasant or uncomfortable, such as car exhaust or body odor. Simply acknowledge the smell and allow it to be, neither good nor bad. Smells are just smells. Breathe mindfully and allow any tension or panicky sensations in your body to drop to the earth.
   
8. Check in with your emotions. How did this exploration of your senses make you feel? You may feel more grounded and connected. You may notice a great many more details about your surroundings. Feel the earth lovingly cradling you and all of your fears in her arms without any judgment. You may notice a newfound relationship with the earth—from the ground that you walk on to the water that you drink to the air that you breathe, all of which support and sustain life—based on wholehearted and unconditional acceptance. This is the sacredness built into the “web of life.” What feels sacred to you right now?