Borrowed Magic (12 page)

Something moved at the edge of her vision,
and she glanced to the side just as Teige got up from the table
where he was playing cards and came to stand next to Philip.

“Maren?” Philip nudged again, this time his
eyes filling with concern. “Is something wrong?”

“Yes
!” she wanted to scream. Everything was wrong, and she needed
his help. But it would have to wait. Asking to speak to Philip
alone in front of Kira was one thing. Asking in front of an entire
group of people that included Teige was another thing entirely.
Because if Teige suspected she knew the truth, if he suspected she
was going to tell Philip, he’d…

She shivered. “I’m sorry to interrupt. I was
looking for Adare.” She backed from the room, glancing once more at
the two men in front of her. Philip took a step to follow her and
then seemed to change his mind. Teige, on the other hand, observed
her with something bordering on enjoyment. And as their eyes met,
his brows lifted just the slightest.

As if he knew what she’d discovered.

Twelve

Maren sat in the middle of her
bed and listened to the shuffle of hooves in the castle courtyard
below her window. A minute later they faded into the distance.
She’d been awake for hours – that is if she’d ever really been
asleep. It all felt like one big nightmare. She hadn’t found the
courage to put the ring back on. She’d been waiting for Daric and
Teige to leave on their now-daily ride so she could find Philip,
make him put on the ring, and hope he had some idea what to do
next. And now Daric and Teige were gone. But she still couldn’t
seem to reach for the ring, to destroy the perfect image of her
bedroom – even if she knew it wasn’t real.

Neither could she hide in her room all day
ignoring the truth.

She swung her legs over the side of the bed
with sheer willpower, dressed, and pulled her hair into a knot at
the base of her neck. Her hand shook as she forced the ring onto
her finger, twisting it around until only the silver band showed.
Then she took a deep breath and stepped into the hall.

Her horror mounted with each step. Nothing
had been repaired, everything was in ruin. Even knowing what it had
looked like during the siege didn’t help. After the seeming reality
of the past months, the worn tapestries, cracked paint, shattered
windows, and general decay were jarring, making her feel like a
stranger in the place she’d called home her entire life.

She stepped into the dining room, only to be
disappointed when Philip wasn’t there. She made her way over to
Adare and sat down, trying to act as if nothing was wrong.

Adare nodded down at the empty table where
her plate should be. “Aren’t you hungry?”

“Not really.” She glanced at the food on
Adare’s plate and paled. Instead of the normal sausages, eggs, and
flatcakes, the plate held coarse brown bread and a boiled potato.
The serving table was the same. Bread, potatoes, some corn mush.
None of the delicacies the castle was used to. Nothing that spoke
of royalty, society, or enjoyment.

She looked back at Adare, knowing she
couldn’t hide her growing fear for long. “I guess I’m just not
feeling very well today.”

Adare reached out and took her hand. “Then
why are you here? Go to bed.”

Adare squeezed her hand, and she froze as a
new revelation hit her. It wasn’t just the state of the castle and
the food that weren’t right. It was also the people. They didn’t
physically appear different, but their clothes were thread-bare,
their shoes were worn, they appeared…wrong, broken, oppressed.

“Maren?” Adare’s eyes narrowed. “What aren’t
you telling me?”

“Nothing.” She tried to smile but wasn’t at
all convinced she’d succeeded.

Adare frowned and opened her mouth to say
something else but Maren cut her off.

“Actually, I was looking for Philip. He
asked me to find a book from my father’s study, and I wanted to
give it to him.”

Adare looked torn between
questioning Maren further
and
helping her find Philip. “I haven’t seen him this
morning. Maybe he went with Daric and Teige.”

Her hope sank.

“You should ask his groom.”

“I will.” She excused herself and fled,
dreading what she’d find outside the castle but knowing she
couldn’t ignore it.

Her first stop was the stables, where she
discovered that Philip was indeed gone but not with Daric. He’d
left even earlier with a few of his soldiers to inspect some minor
disturbance a few hours ride north.

Pushing back her disappointment, she headed
towards the city, knowing she couldn’t put it off indefinitely.
Besides, the more she knew about what was really going on, the more
she could tell Philip.

She wove through streets heaped with rotten
food and waste and covered her nose. Animals wandered freely, homes
were falling apart, goods sold in the market were nothing more than
twigs and rocks. It was ten times worse than during the siege. Then
the people could see what was around them. They at least tried to
keep the city clean, to maintain a semblance of normal. Now,
everything was different. They looked…broken. Had Teige done the
same thing to the rest of the kingdom?

She wandered for hours through sights she’d
never have believed a few days ago. And then she saw the girl who’d
given her the ribbon. Her eyes lit when they saw Maren, and she
rushed forward, thrusting her arm out in front of her. The rosewood
bracelet dangled from her wrist.

“Lady Maren,” she called. “I still have it.
Ma wasn’t angry.”

Up close, the girl’s condition was
heartbreaking. She was dirty, her dress was torn, and her feet were
bare and callused. Maren had never before had to work so hard for a
smile. “I’m so glad.”

The girl beamed and skipped away, leaving
Maren sick.

She pried the ring from her finger, but this
time it didn’t help. The images she’d seen were burned into her
mind. She stumbled forward, grasping at anything that could help
her stay upright, until she finally made it back to the castle – to
where, no matter how tattered they looked, the people still had a
semblance of normal.

Somehow, she managed to get a hold of
herself before greeting the footman who opened the door. Then she
went straight to Adare’s room. She had to warn her about Teige.
Maybe she’d believe where Daric hadn’t.

Her knock was immediately answered, and
Maren stepped into the room.

“You’re even paler than you were this
morning.” Adare motioned for Maren to sit. “Are you sure you’re all
right?”

Maren shivered but remained standing.

Adare now looked genuinely concerned.
“Maren, what is it?” She crossed the small space and put a hand on
each of Maren’s arms. “What is wrong?”

Maren took a step back and closed her eyes
until she could trust herself to speak.

“I don’t think Lord Teige is who he says he
is.”

Adare’s brows creased, and for a brief
second, Maren thought she was angry.

“Why? He helped Philip save the kingdom, and
he’s become one of Daric’s closest friends.”

The thought of which made Maren more
terrified than the rest. “And you don’t find anything suspicious
about him at all? Not even the fact that he claims to be a lord but
won’t tell us where his seat is, or what caused such a rift between
him and his family? You do realize it’s only on his own word that
we even assume he is a lord.”

Adare frowned. “I’ve never been the least
suspicious. You should know better than anyone that there are
things better left in the past.”

Just what Daric had said when she’d tried to
tell him her concerns.

“I do know.” She paused. “But there’s
something about how easily Kern was defeated, about Teige’s
mysterious past, and—”

“No!”

The force of Adare’s exclamation shocked
Maren almost as much as the ring’s revelations had.

“No, Maren.” This time Adare spoke more
gently, looking almost as surprised as Maren at her sudden
outburst. “I know you’ve wondered about the victory, I know you
don’t admire Teige like the rest of us do, but on this you’re
wrong.”

“I don’t think I am,” Maren said softly.

“Then let me reassure you.” Adare’s voice
was almost cold. “Philip, the man you love and who you’ve known
almost your entire life, respects Teige. They are best friends. And
Daric, my husband and your king, has accepted him. As a lord and a
friend. I suggest you try to do the same.”

The shock at being so addressed by her
friend left Maren without a voice. Nothing seemed normal any more.
“I’m sorry, Adare, but I can’t. I don’t think Lord Teige is being
completely honest about who he is.”

Adare walked back to her
chair and sat down. “I
cannot
allow you to say negative things about Lord
Teige. I can’t listen to them. It hurts to even hear them. If you
have nothing better to say, then you need to leave.”

Maren realized with dawning
horror that what Adare said was true. She
couldn’t
say things against Teige.
She
couldn’t
hear
them or even allow them to be said. Just like with the physical
state of the castle and the city, Adare was being manipulated by
magic. Everyone else was probably in the same state. Including
Philip. And Daric. That’s why he hadn’t listened when she’d gone to
him with her suspicions about Teige. No one could see reality, and
they couldn’t even begin to suspect the person who was behind
it.

She headed blindly for the door.

“Maren, I’m sorry.” Adare sounded almost
desperate. “I don’t know what’s come over me. I didn’t mean to be
so harsh. Please, forgive me?”

Maren pasted on a smile before facing her
friend. “It’s all right. It’s nothing. I shouldn’t have said
anything. I’ve just been upset and not feeling well.”

“Of course,” Adare said, her face now full
of true concern. “I understand. Why don’t you get some rest?”

All Maren could do was nod before retreating
through the door.

She ducked her head and pulled her hair
loose of its knot, hoping to hide the tears that were now flowing
freely. People passed her in the hall, some even called her name,
but she pretended not to hear. She walked as fast as she dared,
heading for the one place she could be alone. But just as she
rounded the last corner before her room, she walked right into
someone.

Strong hands clutched at her arms and panic
consumed her. Teige had found her. He knew she knew the truth. He
was going to hurt her or kill her or—

“Maren!”

“Let go of me!” She struggled to break free,
twisting as hard as she could, but the hands held her tight.

“Maren! Maren, stop! It’s me.”

Her eyes darted upward – to Philip – and her
body sagged in relief. He just stared down at her, taking in her
swollen eyes and tear-stained cheeks. Embarrassed, she lowered her
gaze and tried to pull away. Instead, his arms went around her,
drawing her tight against his chest.

The tears started all over again, but he
just held her, face buried in her hair while she cried. For the
first time all day, she wasn’t afraid. Philip wouldn’t allow anyone
to hurt her. Somehow, he could make everything all right.

Eventually her breathing became more even,
and she felt his arms loosen the slightest bit.

“Maren?”

She didn’t move, didn’t want the feeling of
safety to end.

“Maren, look at me.”

She swallowed and raised her face to his. He
placed his hand softly against her cheek. His thumb wiped the tears
that hadn’t already soaked his tunic.

Then the look in his eyes changed, and she
heard his quick intake of breath. Every part of her knew he was
going to kiss her. Every part of her wanted him to. His gaze was so
intense she felt as though he could see into her soul. Then he
leaned down and gently pressed his lips against hers. She moved
closer, and the next instant the hand against her cheek had slid
behind her head and the arm around her waist tightened.

It had been so long, so much had happened
since the last time they’d kissed, it felt like Philip was kissing
her for the first time. Only this was different. Then she’d only
known the excitement of a young girl in love. Now there were so
many emotions she couldn’t differentiate them all. Hope, pain,
longing, heartache, love, fear… It made the entire kiss feel
different, more somehow. Philip was different – like a man who’d
fought so hard against something and had finally surrendered.

Even when he eventually pulled away, he
didn’t speak, instead leaning his forehead against hers.

“Tell me what’s wrong,” he finally
whispered. “Please, let me help you.”

The perfect moment was over. Reality, in all
its harshness split through her head like a knife. All the
happiness she’d felt was again out of reach, hidden behind an
invisible wall that neither of them could breach.

“Please. I can’t bear to see you like
this.”

She stepped out of his arms and shivered. “I
can’t. Not here.”

He came towards her, but she held up her
hand, her eyes begging him to stop. Confusion washed over his face,
followed swiftly by hurt and determination.

“Why not?”

She took a deep breath. “You won’t believe
what I have to say unless I show you something, and I can’t do that
here, where someone could overhear us.”

Anger replaced confusion and he threw his
hands in the air. “After what happened in the past, after
everything I’ve put you through, you think I’m not willing to
listen?”

“No, but this is different than three years
ago.” And it was. Then, Philip was his own man, not possessed by
magical spells. Now he was. No matter how much he wanted to
believe, he wouldn’t be able to – unless he put on the ring and saw
the truth for himself.