Beyond Repair (29 page)

I turned to Zoey. “What should we do while we’re there?”

We spent the next several minutes talking about rides, hotel possibilities, and restaurants that we wanted to try.

“Chris, are you coming?” Mom asked.

We might as well address this now. “Of course he’s coming. He’s her father.”

Chris rubbed the top of his head, and then grinned. “I am. And I can’t wait to go.”

Zoey tilted her head and smiled. Dad blinked several times, and then nodded.

My mom’s mouth hung open. “So, are you two getting married?”

“
Mom
—” I stopped when Chris’s grip on my hand tightened, even though I was mortified she’d asked that. We had our little ring misunderstanding last night, but we were only kidding around. I didn’t want to have this serious moment with an audience while Mia was in surgery.

Chris answered her. “We will eventually. But I won’t ask her before talking to the two of you first.” His voice was serious, without a hint of embarrassment or nerves.

Part of me knew it was just a matter of time before we made everything official, but hearing him confirm it meant the world to me. Even though it wasn’t the time or place for this conversation, I loved that Chris was confident enough to tell my parents.

Mom had closed her mouth and looked at my dad before turning back toward us. “I think that’s wonderful. And we know you care about Brooke and Mia.”

“I love them,” he said simply.

I put my head on his shoulder but couldn’t stop myself from checking my phone again. 10:17 a.m. “It’s been over a half hour. Something must be wrong—”

“Nothing’s wrong.”

I sprung to my feet the instant Dr. Belaire started talking. “How is she?”

He smiled at me. “Everything went as expected. Her thyroid has been removed, and she has woken up. She’s sleepy, which is completely normal. But you can go see her.” He looked around the room. “I’m going to limit it to the parents for the time being.”

Dad smiled at Chris. “Go on.”

“Tell Mia we love her,” my mom called as we walked out of the waiting room.

Dr. Belaire walked ridiculously slowly down the hallway, and I had to suppress the urge to sprint past him. But finally, we made it into Mia’s room.

I ignored Dr. Allen and the nurse. The only person I could see was my little girl. She looked at Chris and me with sleepy eyes but smiled as we came closer. “Mom,” she croaked.

“Shhh. Rest your voice, sweetie,” I whispered, pushing her hair off her face.

Chris came up beside me and picked up one of her hands. “How’s she doing?” he asked Dr. Allen, who was looking at the screen of some machine.

The doctor looked up. “She’s doing great.”

I kissed Mia’s forehead. Of course she was. My daughter kicked ass.

* * *

She spent the rest of the morning in her bed, drifting in and out of sleep as my family and I stayed with her. When she was more alert in the afternoon, Kyle and her cousins came to visit. Mia loved all of the attention from everyone, and that she got to eat all the Popsicles she wanted.

Everyone left around dinnertime, except Chris.

I sat on Mia’s bed next to her, stroking her hair. “Do you want to eat something else? Maybe some applesauce?”

She shook her head. “I’m full. I’m sleepy again.” Her voice was quieter than usual and slightly raspy.

“You had a big day.”

“Yes,” she said as she touched the bandages on her throat. “Poor Mia.”

“Yes, you poor, poor girl.”

Chris, still holding the book he read to Mia a few minutes ago, stood up. “I’ll get the nurse to check your neck before bed, okay?”

“Okay, Dad!”

Chris grinned as he walked out of the room.

I kissed her on her head. “Are you happy that Chris is your dad?”

“Yes. Maybe he will let me get a pony.”

“Sweetie, we talked about how a pony can’t live at our house.”

“But Chris … Dad can build it a barn.”

Still my same Mia.

Chris returned with a nurse, and a few minutes later, Mia was asleep.

I was exhausted too, but I wanted to spend a few minutes with Chris before he left. I joined him on the small couch, and his arms hugged me against him.

His fingers trailed over my arm. “What a day, huh?”

“I’m so glad she’s okay.”

“Me too,” he whispered, twisting my hair around his finger.

I yawned, and he laughed. “Mia’s not the only tired one.”

“I think I could sleep for days.” The sound of Chris’s heart was like a lullaby; I could barely keep my eyes open.

He slowly released me and stood up. “Come on; let’s get you into bed.”

My makeshift bed was already set up, so I climbed on and Chris sat on the edge. I gazed up at him, letting myself get lost in his infinite blue eyes for time first time since Mia’s diagnosis.

“God, Brooke. I love you so much,” he said in a choked voice. “I hate leaving you and Mia tonight.”

I trailed along his lips with my fingers. “I know, but she’s out and I will be too in a few minutes. You need a good night’s sleep.”

“That little bed is going to feel so empty without you.”

“Aren’t you going to go to your place and sleep in your giant bed? It will be more comfortable, and your feet won’t hang off it.”

“I like yours.” He leaned down and brushed his lips against mine. “I’ll be here as soon as I can tomorrow, okay? I can’t wait to get you guys home.”

* * *

As the doctor had predicted, Mia was cleared to go home the next morning. If that wasn’t great enough, we also didn’t have to come back for a week. She would need her stitches removed, and Chris and I needed to review her pathology report.

After spending every day in the hospital these past weeks, it was a welcome change to drive away knowing we didn’t have to live and breathe cancer procedures for seven whole days. We could just spend time together and focus on Mia’s recovery.

“I missed my toys,” Mia said as Chris carried her in from the car. “I haven’t seen them in a whole day!”

I held the balloons that Chris had sent Mia in one hand, and I opened the door with my other. “Go ahead, sweetie. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

After I had watched her walk into the house, she made a beeline for her ponies in the living room. I wedged the balloons into the kitchen with Chris’s help.

“There! I think we’ll put them in her room, she …” I stopped talking and looked around. “Whoa, it looks great in here.”

The kitchen floor was mopped, the refrigerator didn’t have any fingerprints on it, and I could see that the living room had been vacuumed. “You did all of this last night?”

He rubbed the top of his head. “Yeah, I missed you guys and needed to keep busy.” He grinned. “I cleaned off the top of the fridge for you, too.”

I hugged him. “You’re the best. Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet. I messed up the Jell-O. It’s kind of like soup …”

Mia’s stood up. “Did you say Jell-O?”

* * *

The doctor had told us that Mia needed to take it easy for the next few days. Her throat was a little sore from the surgery, and she got tired easier than usual. But other than that, she was acting like her regular self, and with each day, she was gaining more strength.

A few days after the surgery, I had parked Mia in front of a movie while I went into the kitchen to start dinner. I found Chris sitting at the table, looking through a catalog and writing.

I pulled some vegetables out of the refrigerator. “How’s it going?”

He looked up in surprise. “You’re starting dinner?”

I nodded. “Yeah, it’s after five.”

He shook his head. “I can’t believe I’ve been in here for so long. I was ordering some drywall, but then I got an idea and started working on plans.”

I looked down at all of the boxes and measurements that he was had drawn but didn’t really understand enough to make sense of them. “You must be really behind with your work.”

“No, not really … I’m still planning and figuring everything out, ordering stuff.” He grinned at me. “I’m so excited for this one.”

I knew Chris liked his job, and it was adorable that he was excited about his next project. “You should start working on it.”

His smile faded, and I kept talking so he’d understand my reasoning. “If the doctor okays everything with Mia at her next appointment, then she’ll be going back to school and I’ll be going back to work. That’s four days away. She’s getting better. Don’t feel like you can’t start on your house.”

He looked torn. “I like being with you and Mia.”

“I like having you here too, but realistically, we both have to think about going back to work.” I gave him a light kiss. “Besides, I haven’t seen you this excited since you were talking about reclaimed wood that day we went door shopping.”

He closed his eyes. “I love listening to you talk about reclaimed wood.”

I laughed, and he brushed my hair out of my face. “I’ll start tomorrow. But I’m going to that doctor’s appointment with you guys.”

* * *

Our little family fell into a new pattern for the rest of the week. Mia and I would spend the day doing art projects and playing with her toys, and when Chris came home, we played games and watched movies.

Until the day came when we had to go back to the hospital for Mia’s follow-up appointment. As promised, Chris took the day off to come with us.

“They don’t need to do blood work, do they?” Mia asked wearily as we drove to the hospital.

I looked over my shoulder at her and smiled. “They shouldn’t need to. They are going to talk to me and Chris about your neck, and they’ll take out your stitches.”

Her lower lip stuck out. “Is it going to hurt?”

“No, but you have to stay still. Not for a long time, though.”

She nodded. “That’s no problem. I’m good at that.”

The kid had had enough practice, with the CT scan and laryngoscopy. Sitting still today was going to be nothing.

Shortly after we got to the office, they removed her stitches, and the doctor was happy with the way the incision was healing. She would have a faint scar, but it wouldn’t be noticeable.

And then it was time for what I was really nervous about and had avoided thinking about all week.

I handed Mia my phone to play with after Dr. Belaire had announced that it was time to go over the pathology report.
It’s a good sign he’s not sending her off to play with a nurse as we talk … right?

All week, I’d done my best to avoid thinking of the report that would determine if we were done with cancer or if we had more to worry about. It was easy to distract myself and focus on Mia during the day, but at night, when I’d watch the rise and fall of Chris’s chest as he slept beside me, the fears would creep through my mind. This might not be over. The cancer could have spread.

Chris and I sat on a little couch, and he reached for me. I stared down at our joined hands, thinking of all of the times we’d sat in a doctor’s office these past few weeks. I’d give
anything
for this to be the last one.

Dr. Belaire tapped the iPad in front of him and looked at us. “As you know, when we removed the lymph nodes, we also took samples of Mia’s surrounding skin. Everything was sent for biopsy.”

I nodded, squeezing Chris’s hand. Duh. Of
course
I knew that. “Yes, I remember.”

“The biopsy concluded that though the lymph nodes contained cancer, it had not spread to any surrounding areas.”

Chris let out a breath of air, and I blinked, waiting to see if the doctor had more to say. But he just smiled at us.

My heart soared as I realized he was done speaking and didn’t have any horrible news to add. “So, that’s it? She’s done with all of this?”

“For the most part, yes. We caught it early and the surgery was a success. She’ll still have to take her medication, of course …”

I listened as Dr. Belaire continued, but I really wanted to do cartwheels around the room. The worst was behind us.

Mia is fine.

Tears brimmed my eyes, but there was nothing sad about this. I hated crying, but I’d cry happy tears all day long for Mia. I grinned at my perfect, healthy, little girl, and she looked up from the phone and smiled at me. Her eyes shifted to Chris, and her expression transformed to alarm. “Dad, why are you sad?”

I turned toward Chris. His eyes were watery, and he quickly wiped the side of his face with the hand that wasn’t holding mine. My insides melted. Those were more than happy tears. Chris had already lost one child and his brother. Combined with what he’d gone through with us, this was the end of an emotional roller coaster.

“Babe, it’s over,” I whispered, letting go of his hand and trailing my fingers over his cheeks, wiping away the tears.

Mia walked over to us and patted Chris on the arm. “It’s okay, Dad.”

“I know,” he said in a choked voice as he picked up Mia and put her on his lap. “I’m so happy we can put all of this behind us.”

I wrapped one arm around Chris and the other around Mia, bringing them both toward me.

“I’ll … er … let the three of you have a moment,” Dr. Belaire said.

Chris’s head dropped to my shoulder, and my arm crossed over him as we both hugged Mia to us.

“I love you both,” I mumbled as I closed my eyes and savored the moment with my family.

“I know,” said Mia.

Chris’s body shook with laughter. “Yeah, we know that already.”

“Mom?”

“What, sweetie?”

“I have to pee.”

I relaxed my grip on her. “Let’s go then. And we need to do something fun tonight.”

“Can we go to Pizza Castle?” Mia asked.

“That’s a great idea.”

“Hooray!” She jumped up and down but then stopped as panic crossed her face. “I have to go to the bathroom first, though.”

* * *

We picked up Ryder on the way to Pizza Castle, and Zoey’s family was already there when we arrived. It was still early in the evening, so the place was fairly empty. The kids ran to the bounce house, and after Kyle had given me a hug, he and Chris went to watch them.

“Want to play Paperboy?” I asked Zoey.

“Nah,” she said, looking down.

That was weird. Paperboy was one of the few games we were equally matched at. We usually had fun playing it.