Beyond Repair
Authors: Kelly Lincoln
Tags: #Literature & Fiction, #Genre Fiction, #Family Life, #Romance, #Contemporary, #Romantic Comedy, #novel
Beyond Repair
Kelly Lincoln
Beyond Repair
Copyright © 2015 by Kelly Lincoln
Cover Design:
Najla Qamber Designs
Cover Photo: Stock Photo ©
Dollar Photo Club
Editing:
Editing4Indies
Proofreading:
Vivid Words Editing
Formatting:
Champagne Formats
All rights reserved. No parts of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the copyright owner except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, resold, hired out, or otherwise circulated without the publisher’s prior consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser. Under no circumstances may any part of this book be photocopied for resale.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
The author acknowledges the trademark status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owner.
This book is not intended for readers under the age of eighteen.
Table of Contents
Also by
Kelly Lincoln
Author’s Note
This book contains explicit language, graphic sexual content, and several topics which may be triggers to some readers. Reader discretion is advised.
For Marianne, Anna, and Megan.
Thanks for always believing in me.
#TheAwesome
Chapter One
T
HERE ARE PERFECT MOMS WHO
have all their shit together. It really sucked that I was so not one of them.
And that was why, when I picked up my daughter from preschool (fine, it was daycare), she had a note from the teacher reminding me that it was my turn to bring in “two healthy snack choices for the class” tomorrow. And no, I couldn’t blame Mia’s teacher for springing this on me at the last minute. She’d sent home a schedule, and it was hanging on the refrigerator. It just was buried under drawings of ponies, rainbows, and kittens, so it slipped my mind.
It wouldn’t have been a big deal on any other night of the week, but tonight, Mia had karate. The quick dinner at home I had planned before heading to class wasn’t going to happen if we were going to make it on time with this unexpected stop. I’d already come to terms with the fact that we were going to McDonald’s. And though I tried to appear indifferent when I shared this with my very excited daughter, I wanted to scream
hooray
with her. I frigging loved french fries.
I grabbed a bottle of apple juice and looked down at Mia. “What do you want to bring in?”
“Cookies! The ones with the sprinkles.” She swung the shopping basket she insisted on carrying, even though it barely cleared the floor.
“Nice try. How about granola bars?”
“I guess.” She sighed, but I didn’t get an argument. Mia was smart; she knew a lost cause when she saw one.
I let her get them off the shelf, and we made our way up the aisle. We were walking so slowly that I wasn’t surprised when a lady using a walker caught up with us.
She smiled at Mia and looked at me. “What a pretty little girl. Does her dad have blond hair?”
A rock sat in my stomach, even though I’d heard this question before. Mia and I looked very similar, right down to our green eyes. The only difference was our hair. Mine was brown, while hers was blond.
The answer was yes, by the way. He did. But like hell was I going to mention
that
asshole.
I smiled politely, ready with my standard answer. “My mom has blond hair. That’s where she gets it from.”
“Well, she’s precious.”
“Thanks.” Mia looked up and smiled, and I took her hand, waving good-bye as we walked away. If Mia started talking, we’d be there all night.
“Let’s hurry up and grab some strawberries so we can get to McDonald’s. Sound good?”
She nodded. “Okay, but Sidney can’t eat them.” A guilty look crossed her face, and she leaned toward me as I crouched down on the floor. Her voice dropped to a whisper. “Because Al is a jerk.”
“Huh? Who’s Al?”
“Al is a big jerk.”
I studied her serious expression for a moment, processing what she told me. “Do you mean allergic?”
“Yeah, that’s what I said.” She looked at me as if I was an idiot.
“Allergic means if she eats strawberries, then she’ll get sick, Mia … never mind. We’ll talk about it later. Let’s get grapes instead.” I stood and turned toward the grape display across the aisle from us.
That was when I saw his profile.
I grasped Mia’s hand as the memories I kept shoved in the back of my mind sprung forward, flashing scenes like a shitty movie I didn’t want to see. Empty hall. Bare office. Blurry view of the ceiling. Blurry view of
him
looking down at me.
The horrible nauseating feeling punched me in the stomach. I froze in place as a metallic taste filled my mouth
.
“Yeah, okay.” I could barely hear Mia as the panic started to sink in and replace the hate.
Don’t let him see you. Don’t let him see Mia.
“Um, actually no,” I whispered. “Let’s get yogurt instead. I’m going to carry you because we’re in a big hurry.” I scooped her up into my arms as I took the basket from her.
Mia was pissed. “Hey! Carrying the red basket was
my
job.”
She was way too loud. I put my head down and let my hair fall in my face as I walked briskly down the aisle, talking to her in a quiet voice. “Sorry, but I really want a turn. What are you going to get at McDonald’s?”
“Chicken nuggets. No, a cheeseburger. Um …” Her voice returned to its normal volume, trailing off as she debated.
Get away, get away, get away.
Turning the corner, my gaze shifted to see if he saw me. Saw us.
He walked down the aisle, in our direction. I could barely make him out through my curtain of hair.
It wasn’t him.
I pushed my hair out of my face and let out a breath of relief as I looked at the guy. The only resemblance they shared was their build and hair color. This guy was actually taller than …him.
“Are you okay, Mom?” My smart girl noticed that something was up. I supposed it wasn’t hard, seeing that I stopped in my tracks and was breathing heavily.
“I’m fine, sweetie.” I kissed the top of her head as we made our way to the dairy aisle. I slid her down to the floor and fumbled through my purse until I pulled out a small bottle of hand sanitizer.
“Magic Soap time.” She stuck out her hand.
“That’s right,” I replied, squirting a small amount on her palm. My breathing was still rushed and jagged, but it was okay; everything would be better soon.
I squeezed some of the liquid onto my palm and rubbed my hands together. Much better. Much cleaner. I did it again, and my breaths slowed and became even.
Mia looked up at me. “Magic Soap time is over. Time for McDonald’s! Right, Mom?”
I put the bottle back in my purse, trying to ignore the sinking feeling that Mia had seen me calm myself down with hand sanitizer too many times. “It’s over. Pick out the yogurt you want to bring to school, and let’s get out of here.”
* * *
After a delicious dinner of Chicken McNuggets and french fries (and apple slices for Mia), we pulled up to the karate studio with a full minute to spare. I grabbed the McDonald’s coffee out of the cupholder and followed her into the lobby. She ran ahead of me toward the front desk. “Hi, Aunt Zoey!”
Zoey, my older sister, sat behind the counter, and she looked like crap. Her abnormally huge brown eyes had circles under them, and her hair was pulled into a messy bun with a pencil sticking out of it. She also had a Post-It stuck to one of her boobs, but I’d make fun of that later. Zoey smiled. “Hey, Miss Mia. How are you?”
“Good,” she sang as I pulled her gi out of her backpack and helped her put it on over her clothes. After knotting her belt, she ran through the door on the back wall of the reception area to where her lesson was already starting.
I didn’t bother to follow her. This was my brother-in-law’s studio, and Mia spent a lot of time here. Besides, I could see her and her classmates through the huge glass window behind the front desk. Instead, I opted to talk to Zoey. From the look on her face, she needed it.
After my scare in the grocery store, I kind of needed it, too.
I pushed the coffee in front of my sister before I sat in a chair across from her desk. She shot me a grateful look and took a sip. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome,” I said, looking at her carefully. “How’s it going?”
“Just … busy. Really busy. With packing and then Kim quitting, so I have to work the desk; it’s just a lot.”
Zoey, her husband, Kyle, and their three kids lived next door to me, squeezed into a two-bedroom condo. They had been able to afford something bigger for years and were finally moving. I nodded. “It’s going to be so worth it, though. Your new house is beautiful.”
She didn’t answer me.
“You’ll be fine. I can help tomorrow after work or take the kids so you’ll have more time. You might as well take advantage of it since you have me next door for three more days.”
“I’m still worried about leaving you.”
I sighed. “Are we going to do this again? It’s only fifteen minutes away. You have to do what’s best for your family.”
“Yeah,” she mumbled, taking another sip of coffee. When she put the cup down, her tense expression morphed into casual. As in, fake casual, like trying-so-hard-to-get-you-to-engage-in-this-conversation-without-being-obvious casual. “I saw Chris last week.”
The frigging new neighbor conversation. I so wasn’t going to take the bait. Kyle’s best friend from middle school was moving back to our city and buying their old condo. I think it was out of pity because they’d had it on the market forever. Zoey and Kyle were thrilled that my new neighbor was someone they knew. Since I had no interest in getting to know anyone, it really didn’t matter to me. “Nice.”
“If you had gone with us to Jeff’s last week, you would have met him. Kyle is so happy he’s moving back—”
“Yes, nothing like being reunited with one of your friends from middle school. I’m sure they’ll have a great time together, making armpit farts and playing whatever stupid video game boys play these days. Have fun with that.”
“You’re one to talk. You love video games.”
“Only the classics.”
She waved her hand at me. “If you’d leave the house once in a while, then you’d have met —”