becoming us (27 page)

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Authors: Anah Crow

BOOK: becoming us
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Zac didn’t answer, probably couldn’t. He was so busy scrambling to hold onto something, anything, and to hold back his low, pleasure-drenched moans that there couldn’t have been any focus left for speaking. He looked lost and debauched and unashamedly sexy.

Bryce loved it. “Fuck, I don’t care if he hears you,” he confessed, following it up by slamming into Zac with a low grunt. “I don’t give a damn. God, I want the world to know I make you fucking crazy.” He might feel differently later, but now he was groaning shamelessly and fucking Zac hard as he fell apart.

Zac came, finally, but he managed to be quiet after all. The few moans that did make it past his bitten lip all sounded like Bryce’s name. Zac’s body clenching around him sent Bryce over the edge, whining and writhing and fucking Zac harder. His hands were going to leave bruises on Zac’s hips, the way he was pulling himself deep into Zac’s body.

Becoming Us - 137

When Bryce’s thrusts slowed, Zac wriggled to get his legs down from Bryce’s shoulders. He pulled Bryce down for hot, slow kisses. “So good, Bryce. Love you.” Bryce let Zac move him, snuggling down. “God. Zac.” He couldn’t think to say more than that.

Zac did crazy things to his head and body. He felt nerveless, like he’d spilled everything in his spine out into the condom when he came.

Zac kept kissing him, holding him close. They were warm and damp with sweat and sticky with Zac’s come, but Zac didn’t seem to be in any kind of hurry to wriggle away or to get out from under Bryce or to do anything that would put distance between them.

Bryce wasn’t in a hurry to move either. When the sweat was cooling on his skin, though, he lifted his head. “Sleep now?” The idea of curling up with a sweetly sleepy Zac and holding him all night was the perfect finish to their day.

Zac smiled and leaned up to nuzzle against Bryce’s mouth. “Yes,” he whispered against Bryce’s lips. “Yeah. I like sleeping here with you.”

“I like you here.” Bryce kissed Zac one more time as he pulled out. God, he didn’t want to. He wanted to stay as close as he could and never let go. “You want me to go get you a cloth?”

“I don’t want you to go anywhere.” Zac shifted, and then his nose wrinkled up. “But, uh. I’m really sticky. Like, a lot.”

Bryce laughed and kissed Zac on the nose. “I’ll be right back.” He got up and grabbed tissues to get rid of the condom, then he pulled his robe on. Turning back, he looked at Zac one more time, gauging how he felt about himself, about them.
Good
. He felt good. “I’ll be right back,” he said again, feeling like he was leaving his heart behind with Zac, even though he was just letting himself out to go down the hall.

“I’ll be here.” Zac stretched out on the bed. Bryce’s bed. He looked comfortable there, like it was exactly where he belonged.

The hall was dark; Bryce could hear the television downstairs and then the jingle of Steve’s ringtone. There was no light from under Kaede’s door, either. All good. Bryce was so over sneaking around. He padded into the bathroom and closed the door, then ran the water. The fear of getting caught was still gnawing at him, but Bryce knew he wasn’t afraid of people he didn’t know finding out. It was just that he was afraid of losing the people he did know.

When Bryce got back, he crawled up over Zac and cleaned him off with a warm, wet washcloth.

Yes, Zac was a mess, and Bryce wanted to fix what he’d done. He watched Zac’s face as he cleaned up Zac’s thighs, working inward. “This okay?”

Zac shifted his legs further apart. “‘S good.” He smiled and wriggled a little. “You gonna clean up the lube, too?”

Becoming Us - 138

Bryce didn’t answer, he just washed all the way up between Zac’s thighs, over the sweet curves of his asscheeks, between them, and up behind his balls. Then he folded the cloth the other way and cleaned the come off of Zac’s cock and belly. He loved doing this, he realized. When he looked up and met Zac’s eyes, he was too overwhelmed with emotion for anything in his past to gnaw at him. He felt clean.

“Hey.” Zac smiled, sweet and soft. “Feels better now. Thanks.” Bryce pitched the cloth into his laundry bin and shed his robe so he could crawl up to the head of the bed. “Come sleep.” He offered Zac a hand to draw him in.

Zac slipped his hand into Bryce’s and curled in against Bryce’s body. Zac was warm and pliant, still loose-limbed and easy and smiling sweetly. Bryce covered him up reluctantly; looking at Zac by candlelight was like eating candy. Delicious.

“I like this,” Bryce whispered. “Just... start staying with me.” No one would even notice, he knew it. “Whenever you want,” he added, knowing that Zac might like having his own space. “I want you here. Or I’ll come to you. I don’t care.” He had turned the corner, mentally, and he wanted to make sure he didn’t backslide.

Zac looked surprised, but happy. “We’ll. Yeah, both. I want. I like it when you come to my room, too.”

Oh, good. Bryce kissed him. “I’m... I need... I want this to be real,” he said, trying to find the right words. He stroked his fingertips delicately over Zac’s features. “I don’t... it’s not smart to just tell people yet, not until I get shit sorted with my family. I don’t know what’ll happen. But. I want us. I want us to be like if we were anyone else.” He hoped that made some sense.

“We’ll figure something out.” Zac snuggled up close. He didn’t sound frustrated or tense or worried about any of it, even though it couldn’t have been easy for him -- already out to his family and the whole world -- to be dating someone like Bryce.

“I’m sorry,” Bryce said softly. “I wish I could...” He kissed Zac’s shaved head and then blew out the candles on the bedside table.

“It’s okay.” Zac pressed a kiss to Bryce’s shoulder. “It’s okay.”

“I love you so much, Zac.” Bryce snuggled down in the pillows and blankets with his boyfriend.

“You deserve for me to tell everyone how lucky I am.” He sighed heavily and cuddled Zac up against him. At least they were together.

Becoming Us - 139

Chapter Nine

Practice had run late. Normally, Zac wouldn’t have minded much; more swimming inevitably led to better times later. Tonight, though, he had good reason to want to get out of the natatorium

-- the swimming place, as Bryce liked to call it, if only because it made Kaede hiss
Natatorium!

at him every time.

They’d finally gotten their results back from the HIV tests, and Zac wanted to celebrate, to get Bryce in bed and naked, with some lube and no condoms, and just fuck for hours.

Unfortunately, that hadn’t happened yet. Still, practice was finally over and the rest of the guys had already filtered out of the locker room by the time Zac finished up his shower.

Bryce was running late; he’d been doing some extra work on his turns and talking to Coach. He wandered in as the last of the swim team was headed out and turned on the shower as Zac was turning off his.

“Hey,” he said, not looking at Zac as he hung up the mesh bag with his shampoo and soap and stuff. “Sorry about that. Coach just wanted to go over some stuff before he took off.” He ducked his head under the water and sputtered a little as it took a while to warm up.

“‘S okay.” Zac stepped out of the shower trough and dried off, then hung his towel over the door of his locker. He didn’t try to hide that he was watching Bryce shower while he did it. “You doing anything after this?”

“Nope, all done.” There was a click and half the overhead lights in the locker room went out.

“See, even the lights say it’s time to go home,” Bryce said dryly. Thanks to cost-saving measures, the natatorium and its locker rooms closed far earlier than the rest of the athletics complex some nights. Bryce turned toward Zac as he tilted his head back under the water, washing the chemical-laden pool water out of his hair. “Do you have to go to the library or anything?”

Even if he’d needed to go to the library, Zac would’ve put it off until tomorrow. Tonight, all he wanted to do was go home and have sex with his boyfriend. Bareback.

God, Bryce was gorgeous, and his big cock was right there in front of Zac like a tease, like an invitation. If he hadn’t been so sure it was a bad idea -- BAD, with all capital letters -- Zac would have gotten down on his knees and sucked Bryce off right here in the goddamn locker room, and fuck you to anyone who might walk in and stop them. It
was
a BAD idea, though. So Zac just stood there watching Bryce shower, instead.

Bryce shampooed and rinsed, letting Zac track the suds all over his very fit body. Zac was too busy watching a cluster of lucky white bubbles slide over the curve of Bryce’s hip and into the crease between Bryce’s thigh and body to notice that Bryce was reaching for him. Bryce’s arm slid around his waist, pulling him into the shower, and Bryce’s mouth found his in a hot kiss.

Becoming Us - 140

Zac instinctively opened up to the kiss before he remembered where they were. Then he pulled back and looked up at Bryce in surprise. “Bryce-- We’re in the locker room. Do you-- Are you sure you wanna do this here?” Kissing in public, where anyone could walk in on them, was a dangerous proposition.

“You’re not so hot that I forgot where we are.” Bryce groped his ass and kissed him again, hard.

“Almost, though.”

Truth was, there wasn’t much chance of getting caught. They were in the back of the locker room, the far end of the showers, in the half-dark, after closing. The doors were squeaky from the humidity, and no one else had any reason to be here other than banging about in their locker to grab some forgotten item. Bryce’s kisses were hot and demanding, his hands were all over Zac’s ass, and his erection was sliding against Zac’s hip.

Zac gave up, not that he’d really wanted to stop kissing Bryce anyway. He wrapped his arms around Bryce’s shoulders and kissed him back, hot and deep, his tongue teasing into Bryce’s mouth. Bryce’s hands on his ass were so, so tempting. Zac settled his feet a little further apart and arched, dragging his dick against Bryce’s belly and pushing his ass back into Bryce’s hands.

“God, I love you.” Bryce turned them around and pushed him back against the wall. “I don’t want to wait until we get home.” There was no telling what had come over him, why he was doing this now, but he seemed damned determined about it. “Besides, I promised you...” He trailed off, licking and biting down the side of Zac’s neck.

Promised to fuck him in the locker room. In the showers.
Oh, God
. Zac moaned, tilting his head to bare his neck for Bryce. “Yeah. Yeah, that’s...” Good. It was so good. He didn’t have any lube, but, for once, he just didn’t care. The way Bryce’s mouth felt on his neck, just the
idea
of Bryce fucking him here, was enough that any concerns seemed trivial.

“Now.” Bryce fumbled around in his stuff and came up with a sachet of lube and a condom, clinging together with wetness. He threw the condom back in the bag and then kissed Zac again.

They didn’t need that. “Right now. Right here.” He pulled back enough to look at Zac; his eyes were blown with need, his cheeks were flushed, his mouth was full from their kisses.

“Now,” Zac agreed, pulling Bryce in for one more kiss before he turned around to face the wall.

“Now is perfect.”

They couldn’t waste time. Bryce’s slick fingers pushed into him without ceremony; a soft whimper suggested that he was watching his fingers, something he seemed to love. A moment later, the hot head of Bryce’s cock was pressing into him, just enough for Zac to push back and take it in his own time. “Oh, God.” Bryce already sounded overwhelmed. He kissed the side of Zac’s neck as his slick hand found Zac’s cock and stroked slowly. “Zac...” Zac arched his back and let the feel of Bryce’s hand on his dick distract him, open him up, until Bryce’s cock was all the way in. He took a couple deep breaths, just getting used to how big Bryce always felt inside him, and then rolled his hips a little, urging Bryce to move. “Fuck me.”
Becoming Us - 141

The sensation of being filled up like that, and with Bryce stroking him, and the water rushing down over them, was so intense, Zac didn’t want to wait anymore. “Bryce. Fuck me hard.” Bryce was making soft, desperate noises against Zac’s neck as he moved. He fucked Zac with long, hard strokes, holding Zac close with one arm around Zac’s waist. “Zac, oh,
fuck
. Fuck, you feel so good.” His voice was shaky with emotion. “God. I never...” He trailed off as he got lost in kissing and biting Zac’s neck, groaning every time his hips hit Zac’s ass with each hard stroke.

It felt amazing. The difference, for Zac, wasn’t in the physical absence of the condom, but in the way that absence made Bryce respond and in the forbidden aspect of not using one. And, God, the way Bryce responded was incredible. He was always really into it when they fucked, but tonight he just seemed lost in it, overwhelmed, and that was such a turn-on for Zac. Zac couldn’t hold back his moans, couldn’t stop himself from begging for it in a whisper.

“Yeah, yeah, fuck me. God, so good. Just like that. Oh. Oh,
fuck
. Don’t stop.” Bryce gasped against Zac’s skin and then bit down to stifle his noises, sucking and licking at the curve of Zac’s neck. Usually, he was gentler, but he took Zac hard and fast, rolling his hips to get everything out of each thrust, pushing Zac’s cock through his slick hand over and over again. It didn’t take long for him to start to tremble, his rhythm faltering as his control slipped.

Zac was right there with him, shuddering with every thrust. He loved it hard, loved the way it made every thrust feel like it went all the way through him, loved the way he knew he’d be able to feel it tomorrow. When he came, it felt like that went all the way through him, too, tearing away everything but how good he felt as he hissed Bryce’s name and fucked into Bryce’s hand just as rough and quick as Bryce was fucking into him.

Zac was going to have marks on his neck and shoulder, especially where Bryce bit down as he came. Bryce pulled away before he did any real damage, giving in to gasping Zac’s name over and over. He bucked against Zac’s ass, burying himself deep as he came, spilling into Zac’s body with one rush after another.

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