Beautiful Mess (34 page)

He
let out a huge breath, disappointment, and something like fear, clouding his
eyes.  That look on his faced crushed her.  Cole dropped his eyes and
sat up.  He ran his hands through his hair before dropping his head into
his hands.

“Cole?”
Bri asked worriedly as she sat up, pulling her dress back up.

“Just...
just give me a minute,” he replied tightly.  Bri watched him as he took a
couple deep breaths.

“I’m
so sorry...”  Sadness, disappointment, and guilt threatened to overwhelm
her.

“No,
it’s cool.  You don’t want this.  I get it,” he sighed dejectedly,
lifting his head but still not looking at her.

“Are
you serious?” her voice rose, incredulous.  “I want you so badly right
now, I can barely think straight.  I don’t think I’ve wanted anything more
in my entire life than I want you!”

Cole
glanced up at her, a little more hope in his eyes.  “Really?”

“Yes,
really!”  She scooted closer to him.  “But, I have to be honest with
you, too.  As much as I want this, and much as I want you... I
can’t.  I’m not ready.  As much as I hate to admit that, and as lame
as I know it sounds, it’s the truth.  There is so much uncertainty in our
futures right now.  This is a step I’m just not ready to take
tonight.  I don’t want to add more complications to an already complicated
situation.  Do you understand?” she pleaded desperately.  She thought
of Layla’s suggestion to ask him to come to Stanford with her, but she wasn’t
ready for that complication either.

Cole
looked at her for a moment.

“Yes,”
he sighed, “I understand.”

“Are
you mad at me?” she asked, worried.

“What? 
No, of course not!” he grabbed her hand and squeezed it.  “
Extremely
disappointed, yes, but not mad.  Though, you’d better do something about
that dress before I lose what little self-control I have left,” he smiled.

Bri
looked down, realizing her dress was still half hanging off of her.  She
laughed, handing him his shirt, and reached around to zip up her dress.

“It’s
probably better this way, anyway.”  Cole shrugged into his shirt,
buttoning it.  “The backseat of a car isn’t the classiest place for our
first time,” he winked at her, causing Bri to blush as she realized just how
close that came to happening.  A pang of disappointment shot through her.

“Yeah,
but if you’re going to do it in a car, this would be the one to do it in,” she
laughed back at him.

“I’ll
make sure to pass that on to Layla’s dad!”

Having
redressed, they climbed out of the car and headed back into the dance.  As
they entered the gym, Bri was immediately accosted by Layla.

“I’m
going to the ladies room.  Come with me!”  Layla grabbed Bri’s arm
and pulled her away before she could even respond.  Bri shot Cole an
apologetic look before being forcefully removed from the gym.  Instead of
taking her to the restroom, though, Layla drug Bri down to the end of a dark,
deserted hallway and cornered her.

“Okay,
girl, spill!  Did you and Cole just...?”  Layla pounced excitedly.

“What? 
No!”  Bri cheeks flamed red.  “We just needed some fresh air,” she
lied miserably.

“Oh,
come on!  You borrow my keys, you two disappear, and you both walk in
looking substantially disheveled.  Something happened.”  Layla
crossed her arms and looked at Bri knowingly.  “And if you won’t tell me
what, I’ll just go ask Cole,” she raised her eyebrow in challenge.

“Okay,
okay,” Bri caved.  “Yes, we went out to your car, but we just made out a
little, that’s all.”  She felt her cheeks flushing as she remembered
exactly what had happened in the back seat.  Layla noticed it, too.

“That
must have been one hell of a make out session.”  She still looked
skeptical.

“Oh,
it was,” Bri smiled slyly.

“And
you two didn’t...?”

“In
the backseat of a car?  Really, Layla?”  It was Bri’s turn to cross
her arms and raise her eyebrows.  As Layla continued to stare her down,
Bri sighed and relented.  “Okay, it got really heated and really
intense.  And, to be honest, it very easily could’ve happened.  But,
no, we did not have sex.  Happy now?”

Layla
looked slightly disappointed.  “How close are we talking here?”

Bri
rolled her eyes.  “All the important clothing items were still in place,
but the more... superfluous items weren’t.  Not that my sex life is any of
your business!”

“Of
course it is,” Layla scoffed.  “I’m your best friend.  That entitles
me to any and all of the intimate details of your life.  Besides, how can
I live vicariously if I don’t ask?”

“Wait,
you and Devon haven’t...?”  Bri was shocked.

“No,”
Layla looked away, uncomfortable.  “I wanted to be sure of my feelings,
and his, before taking that step.”

Bri
squeezed Layla’s arm reassuringly.

“There’s
nothing wrong with waiting until you’re ready.  I mean, we’re only in high
school.  We have plenty of time.”

“Yeah,”
Layla smiled.  “Plus, my dad promised me if I waited until I was married,
he’d pay for my whole wedding.  Whatever I want, no questions or
restrictions, and he’d pay for my honeymoon.  That kind of deal is hard to
pass up.  Especially when I’m planning on getting Chris Carrabba to sing
at my wedding.” 

“I
better be getting an invitation to that!” Bri laughed.  “But, if you find
you can’t wait any longer, the back seat of the Maserati is very roomy!” 
she teased, handing the keys back to Layla.  Linking arms, the girls were
still laughing as they walked back into the gym.

The
rest of the danced passed quickly.  There was still an underlying thread
of desire and tension between Bri and Cole, but they didn’t allow themselves to
be alone again.  Bri enjoyed being close to Cole in any way she could, and
aside from the death glares she got from Serena, it was a perfect night.

“I
wish you didn’t have to go,” Cole whispered as they stood on his dark porch,
saying goodnight.  “I wish you could stay, that I never had to let you
go.”  He gazed right into her eyes, and Bri was moved by the honesty and
emotion in his words.

“I
wish I could stay, too,” she smiled softly.  At that moment, she wanted
nothing more than to follow Cole inside, and never leave his side.  She
kissed him softly, almost sadly, wishing it could always be like this between
them.  That their relationship didn’t have to end, that they didn’t have
to say goodbye.  That nothing, not college or life, would ever come
between them.  But as she walked back to Layla’s waiting car, she knew
that it couldn’t be.  The inevitable was coming, no matter how much she
wished otherwise.  The only thing she could do was make sure she was
ready.  Because the end would come far sooner than she was prepared for.     

Monday
morning, Cole had a huge smile for Bri as she arrived at her locker.

“What’s
got you in such a good mood this morning?” she asked, wishing she felt that
vivacious.  State was less than two weeks away and Belinda was working the
team over to get ready.  It was third period and Bri was already
exhausted.

“You,”
Cole leaned in for a quick kiss.

Bri’s
body hummed.  There was still a palpable tension between them, but they
were both doing their best to ignore it.

“So,
have any plans for this Friday?” he asked as he pulled back.

“Other
than watching you cremate Santa Rosa?  Nope, no plans at all.  Why,
have something in mind?”

“Alex
Thompson is having a party at his house after the game.  I thought we
could go.”  He tried to sound casual, but by the way his eyes were
dancing, Bri could tell he really wanted to go.  Alex was the forward on
the basketball team, and a good friend of Cole’s. 

“Umm,”
she pretended to deliberate.  “Okay!”

“Great! 
I’ll stop by and pick you up after the game.  Maybe we can get some dinner
first.”

“Sounds
perfect!” she smiled, excited for their date.  The warning bell
rang.  “I gotta run.  See you later.”  She gave him a quick peck
and hurried off to class.

Later
that day, as she stepped out of her seventh period class to go meet Cole at her
locker, Bri was accosted by Natalie.

“Hey
Bri, can I talk to you for a second?”

Bri
sighed.  “What could you possibly want to talk to me about?”

“I
can’t tell you here,” Natalie glanced around and stepped closer.  “But
it’s really important.”

“Natalie...”

“Just
come on.”  Natalie grabbed her arm and pulled her into the girl’s
restroom.

“Okay,
what is it you need to talk to me about
so
badly?” Bri huffed.  It
took her a second to realize the bathroom was empty.  Her stomach
twisted.  Something was wrong.

“Actually,
I’m
the one who wants to talk to you,” a malicious voice sneered.

Bri’s
eyes were immediately drawn to Serena as she stepped out of one of the stalls,
flanked by two of her cheerleader minions.  Natalie moved to block the
door.

“Sorry
about my little trick, but I didn’t think you’d come if you knew it was me who
wanted to see you.”  Serena’s falsely sweet voice steeled Bri’s spine, and
she prepared herself for whatever it was Serena was up to.

“You
could’ve just asked me yourself, Serena.”  Bri mimicked Serena’s
tone.  “You see, unlike most of the people around here, I’m not afraid of
you.”  She added a saccharine smile for effect.

Serena’s
eyes narrowed.

“I’ll
be sure to keep that in mind.  Now, the reason you’re here is because I
feel there’s something I need to talk to you about Cole.”

“Oh,
really?” Bri crossed her arms and raised a brow skeptically.

“Yes. 
I don’t know if you know this or not, but Cole has a certain... reputation
around here.  You see, before you got here, Cole dated a lot of
girls.  And by a lot, I mean
a lot
.  And these
relationships... well, let’s just say they were
very
physical.” 
She smirked as she waited for Bri’s response.

Bri,
of  course, already knew about Cole’s history, but she was beginning to
see where Serena was going with this. Not wanting to give Serena any
satisfaction, she shrugged, “So?”

Serena’s
eyes flared slightly.  She turned her smirk into a feigned look of
concern.

“Well,
you have to understand that a man as
experienced
as Cole, has certain
expectations in that department.  Expectations that you couldn’t possibly
satisfy.”

“Oh?” 
Bri’s face flushed and anger surged through her.  “And why is that,
exactly?”

Serena
laughed, taking a step closer.  She put her hand on Bri’s arm, a look of
pity crossing her face.

“Because,
Bri, it’s completely obvious that you have no experience, at all.  You
have a distinctly
prudish
vibe coming off you.  And let’s face it,
guys like Cole are only interested in one thing.  If they aren’t getting
it, they’ll go somewhere they can.  So you see, you can’t possibly hold
Cole’s attention for long.”  Serena dropped her hand, a victorious look in
her eyes.

“And
let me guess, you think
you
could hold Cole’s attention.”

“Well,
I have before,” Serena smiled smugly.  “In fact, I can’t believe he’s hung
around as long as he has.  He has to know that you’re a lost cause. 
I mean, look at you.  You’re short, frumpy, and hopelessly plain. 
You’re a total nobody.  I honestly don’t know what he even sees in
you.”  She looked Bri up and down with disgust.

Bri’s
anger bubbled over into fury.  She’d had enough of Serena and her stupid,
petty games.  It was time someone stood up to her, and Bri had been aching
to do it.  Letting her anger fuel her, she stepped right into Serena’s
face.  Or as close as she could get, seeing as how Serena had almost a
foot on her.  But Bri didn’t let that deter her.

“I
know what you’re trying to do Serena, and I don’t like it,” Bri said softly but
dangerously.  “First you try to scare Cole away from me, and since that
didn’t work, you’re trying to scare me away from him.  You are so obvious
and unimaginative, it’s really quite pathetic.”

Serena’s
mask finally cracked, and her anger radiated off her.

“
You’re
the one who’s pathetic.  Chasing after Cole like some lost, love sick
puppy.  Forcibly attaching yourself to him.  That is what’s really
pathetic.” she hissed.

“Oh,
you and I both know that’s not what happened,”  she smiled sweetly at
Serena.  “I didn’t pursue Cole, he pursued me.  And we both know that
you
are the one who’s been chasing after Cole like a desperate little
lap dog.  Man, it must really kill you to know that you are practically
throwing yourself at him, and Cole doesn’t even care.”

Pure
hate and fury flashed in Serena’s eyes.  “I will
destroy
you,” she
seethed.

Not
backing down at all, Bri returned Serena’s anger.

“I’d
like to see you try.  The only thing you have to fight with is words,
Serena.  Unfortunately for you, I don’t care what you or anyone else
thinks or says about me.  I, at least, could kick your ass in a real
fight.”

“You? 
Yeah, right,” Serena scoffed.

“Why
don’t you ask Trey about that,” Bri raised her eyebrows.  “I figure if I
can knock him on his ass, you should be easy.”

There
was a flash of fear in Serena’s eyes.  As if sensing their beloved leader
was distressed, the two other cheerleaders stepped forward and flanked Serena
in solidarity.

Not
intimidated in the least, Bri smiled dangerously.  “Do yourself a favor,
and get over yourself Serena.  Cole doesn’t want you, now or ever. 
Move on with your life.  And stay the
hell
out of mine!”  She
turned and stormed to the bathroom door Natalie was guarding.  “Move!” she
yelled, and her anger was so palpable that Natalie actually backed down for
once.

Bri
fumed all the way to her locker.  Cole was there waiting for her, looking
anxious.  Seeing him looking up and down the hall for her, made her heart
melt.  No matter what Serena said or did, Bri knew Cole cared for her,
that she was more than just a conquest. 

Cole’s
eyes finally found her in the crowd, and a relieved smile crossed his
face.  She practically ran to him, throwing herself into his arms. 
She had taken him a bit by surprise, but before he could say anything, she
grabbed his face and pulled it down to hers.  She needed to kiss away all
of the awful things Serena had said.  She needed to silence the
insecurities and doubts that were creeping up inside her.  But most of
all, she just needed Cole.  To feel the comfort and peace in his
arms.  Finally sated, if not satisfied, they were in a public hallway
after all, she pulled back.

Cole
smiled down at her, a little bewildered, but happy.  Something caught his
attention behind her and his face darkened.  Bri turned to see what he was
looking at, though she was pretty sure she already knew.

Serena
stood a little way down the hall, flanked by her lackeys, glaring daggers at
Bri’s back.  She lifted her chin contemptuously, turned on her heel, and
stormed away.

“What
happened?” Cole asked quietly.

“I’ll
tell you on the way home.  Right now I just want to get out of here.”

He
nodded and they headed out to his truck.  He was not happy when Bri told
him about Serena’s little stunt.  She didn’t tell him what Serena had said
exactly, just the main idea.  She did tell him how she’d stood up to
Serena and basically threatened to kick her butt.

“That’s
my girl,” he smiled at her.  “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,”
Bri shrugged.  “She just really pisses me off.”

“She’ll
get over it eventually.  When her schemes and tricks don’t work, she’ll
move on.”

Cole
sounded so sure, but Bri wasn’t convinced.

“I
hope you’re right.”

The
next day, Bri immediately felt the ramifications of her showdown with
Serena.  None of the girls on the dance team, except Layla, would even
look at her, let alone talk to her.  The rest of her day at school was
even worse.  No longer content to whisper behind her back, girls, and some
guys, were slinging random vicious insults at her as she moved through the
halls.  Those who couldn’t think of anything nasty to say just glared at
her.  It didn’t bother Bri too badly, she had endured this kind of
behavior before.  What did make her angry was that it had trickled down to
Cole now, too.

Cole
had always been surrounded by people.  He was constantly nodded greetings
everywhere he went.  But today was different.  Not even the girls,
who were usually fawning all over him, said anything or approached him. 
Even the guys he considered friends, barely glanced at him.  Though he
tried to brush it off, Bri could tell it bothered him.

By
Friday, Cole had had enough.  He plopped down next to her at lunch and
scowled around at the cafeteria.  She wished she could do something to
make things better for him.  Well, there
was
one thing she could
do.

“You
know,” she said quietly to him, “if we broke up, I’m sure things would go back
to normal for you.”

He
looked at her, but didn’t say anything.

“Serena
doesn’t hate you.  It’s me she’s trying to punish.  If we aren’t
together any more, she’ll call off the hounds.  You can go back to having
friends and being popular.”

Cole
stared hard at her.  “And you think that’s what I care about?  Being
popular?” he asked, incredulous.

“No! 
But I can tell this is hard on you, that it upsets you.  I just feel bad I
brought Serena’s wrath down on you,” she finished glumly.

“Bri,”
he sighed, exasperated.  “We knew she would do this.  We knew it was
coming.  Why do you want to give her exactly what she wants?  Why are
you willing to let her win?”

“I’m
not!  I just... I wasn’t sure if you’d changed your mind, decided this
wasn’t worth it anymore.  I just wanted to give you an out if you wanted
one.”

“Ambria,
look at me,” Cole demanded.  When she refused to meet his eyes, he cupped
her cheeks, forcing her gaze up.  “Good.  Now, I want you to listen
very
carefully to what I’m about to say, because I refuse to have this conversation
again.  I do not want an out.  Nothing Serena could ever do would
make me not want to be with you.  I don’t care about being popular, or how
many “fake” friends I have.  I care about
you
.  I’m not upset
for me.  I’m upset because they all are treating you this way.  I’m
angry that everyone follows Serena so easily, without stopping to think for
themselves.  But never,
ever
, have I wanted an out.  I want
you.
 
You are the most important thing to me.  Nothing else matters, as long as
we have each other.  Okay?”

Bri
nodded, tears flooding her eyes.  She refused to cry at school, but Cole’s
words had touched her.  She leaned in and kissed him gently. 

Pulling
back, he smiled at her.  “Good.  Now are we still on for tonight?”

“The
party?”  Bri was a little apprehensive.  “You still want to go?”

“Hell
yeah, I want to go!” he smiled.  “I want to show all these suckers that
they can’t scare us away.  Plus, I want to show off my girl, so wear
something super-hot!”

Bri
laughed, feeling much better.  Cole was right.  It didn’t matter what
happened, as long as they were together.  She was determined not to let
anyone spoil her new found good mood.

It
worked until she got to Cole’s game.  Layla, Jess, and Maddie had come
with her, and even though it was an away game, Bri was shocked by the lack of
Tigers fans in the stands.  The games, both home and away, had been packed
for the past few weeks, and now the visitor’s section was almost empty. 
Anger surged through Bri at Serena and her vindictiveness, ruining this night
for Cole and the team.  Luckily, there weren’t any college scouts here
tonight, but still, she knew it had to hurt Cole.  She scanned the
cheerleaders, unsurprised to find Serena and her most loyal followers
absent.  What she wouldn’t give to be able to take a swing at that girl
right now.