Back To You (13 page)

“Honestly, a lot
of military couples have to get married in the courthouse first and then
eventually have a big wedding if they want to. My parents never did though. My
mom got pregnant with my brother, so they put it off, and then my dad had a
deployment, and then came me… life just went on.”

Mills crossed the
room and put a hand on his fiancé’s shoulder. “That won’t happen to us though,
baby. If you want a big wedding, I’ll make it happen someday.”

Ellie looked
wistfully at the two of them, but I could see that the explanation about
military marriage was something that didn’t sit well with her. I had first hand
knowledge of the silly little things she wanted at her fancy wedding. She
wanted red roses, a chocolate fountain, and a huge dress, among other things.
Most of all, she wanted to be married on Valentine’s day, because it was her
grandmother’s birthday and she thought it would be romantic. I wonder how many
Valentine’s Days would go by before my schedule allowed me to make that happen?
It’s not like I’d be able to just up and take leave whenever I wanted if I was
in training or deployed. Though, I suppose we could always do the court thing
like Mills did, and then have a bigger wedding on some later Valentine’s Day. I
shook my head. I was getting a bit carried away with the marriage stuff. It
wasn’t something I should be thinking about at the moment.

“Okay, I know you
guys are excited,” I began, holding out my hands, “but your plan needs a little
work. We are absolutely, positively, not allowed to leave the state. Hell,
we’re only allowed to go as far as the beach! The Marine Corps is going to take
one look at that marriage certificate when you turn in your paperwork and find
out that you went out of bounds on a
libo
weekend.
You’ll be fucked. We’ll both be fucked.”

I watched as
one-by-one, the other three faces in the room fell. I couldn’t believe Mills
hadn’t already thought of this. They looked totally crushed.

“We thought about
doing it here, but we don’t have a marriage license.” Olivia crossed to her bed
and plopped down with a sigh.

“Sorry, but no
matter how fast Vegas writes marriage licenses, they probably wouldn’t do it tomorrow.
It’s a Sunday. Not even Vegas has county clerks that work on Sundays.” I felt
like a jerk for adding another layer of disappointment, but this plan was
ludicrous.

Mills went to sit
by Olivia and took her hand. “It’s okay, babe. I’m sorry. I got a little
carried away and didn’t think about the logistics. We’ll do it next time I come
home, okay?”

Olivia squeezed
his hand. “Okay.”

“We’ll leave you
guys alone again.” Ellie, who had been silently standing by the window during
this whole exchange, started to walk out the door. She shot me a dirty look as
she passed. I followed her into the hallway. She didn’t turn, so I just let her
lead me in silence down the hall and out into the night. Finally, she rounded
on me. The lights from the streetlamps showed the annoyance on her face.

“What the hell is
wrong with you?” She asked, hands on her hips.

I lifted a brow.
“What the hell is wrong with
you?”

“Me? I’m not the
one that barged in there hell-bent on bursting bubbles!”

“Bursting
bubbles?” I frowned at her, not understanding why she was mad at me for
explaining the flaws in their plan. If it weren’t for me we’d be halfway to
Vegas by now on a fool’s errand.

“Look,” she let
her hands drop with an exasperated noise. “I know you aren’t a big fan of
marriage, but you didn’t have to ruin that for them the way you did. They were
really excited! And here you come ready to just rain on their parade.”

“You’re laying it
pretty thick with the analogies, don’t you think?” I tried to smile crookedly
at her, but she only scowled. “Ellie, Las Vegas is four hours away. We can’t
just go to Vegas so these kids can get married. Besides, like I said, tomorrow
is Sunday. This was a stupid plan to begin with.”

“Yeah, I admit,
they didn’t put much thought into it, but you didn’t have to seem so happy
about shooting it down. You were so insensitive! They’re not kids. It was just
a romantic plan that they got carried away with.”

I groaned. “Look,
I’m trying to make a career out of the military, you already know that. The
last thing I need is to get caught going out of bounds for my buddy’s quickie
wedding ruining that for me.”

She stared at me.
I had no idea why we were having this argument, but I didn’t like it. We never
did this bickering crap. I must have been wrong earlier about the easiness of
our friendship remaining unchanged. We really were acting like a couple, and
not in a good way.

“Ellie,” I sighed.
“I don’t want to fight with you. I’m sorry if you think I was insensitive. It’s
none of my business what they do, but this time it affected me. Selfish or not,
it wouldn’t have worked out anyway without a marriage license. Now can we stop
acting like this? This is why I don’t date.”

With a short
laugh, Ellie rolled her eyes and stepped into my arms. “Yeah, we’re fine. It
feels weird to be mad at you. Just
don’t be an ass.”

“Don’t be a pain
in one.”

Chapter
Thirteen

Ellie

The ride back to
base to pick up Olivia was a long and frustrating one. I was so excited to see
Spencer again, but I also had this odd feeling of foreboding. The weekend had
been amazing. I couldn’t believe how right it felt to be in Spencer’s arms.
After being so close for so long, we just seemed to fit. But no matter how
right everything had felt at the time, there was something eating away at me
now.

I approached the
gate and saw Spencer, Matt, and Olivia waiting for me. Pulling over and parking
near them, I saw that Olivia was grinning widely, but Matt just looked
uncomfortable. My eyes met Spencer’s through the windshield and that feeling of
doubt spread. Something was wrong. I just knew it. I hadn’t spoken to him since
I left on Sunday, but I knew that he wouldn’t have access to his phone once
Liberty ended. Had something changed between then and now?

I pressed the
button on my door to unlock the car so Olivia could put her bags in the back.
Spencer was at my window, and I rolled it down. He narrowed his eyes at me with
a slight smile. “You’re not getting out?”

Without replying,
I unbuckled my seatbelt and opened the door, taking a deep breath. I wasn’t
sure what I was bracing myself for. “Hey.”

“Hey, yourself.”

“How was
graduation?”

“Boring.”

I tilted my head.
“Sorry I missed it.”

Without another
word, he closed the distance between us. His arms held me tight against him and
he buried his face in my hair. He was breathing deeply, one hand just above my
waistline and the other cupping the back of my neck. This hug wasn’t just a
hug. He was saying goodbye. But was he saying goodbye because he’d be leaving
for school? Or was he ending this?

I hoped that my
eyes conveyed what I was feeling when he pulled back to look at me, but his
answering expression was just another question. The sparks were still there, I
could feel my heart pounding at the feel of him and it felt like my skin was on
fire wherever it connected with his. His eyes were scalding as they searched my
face, and I felt like there were a thousand things that we were both trying to
say without actually speaking. In that moment, I don’t think I could have
spoken if I tried.

***

“Ellie, are you
going to tell me what’s going on?”

Olivia’s voice
broke through my silent obsessing. We had gone almost the entire hour home from
Camp Pendleton in silence. I couldn’t stop thinking about the unspoken tension
between Spencer and me.

“You’re going to
have to talk to me eventually, you know.”

I smiled sadly at
her. “I think it’s over with Spencer.”

“Already?”

“Already.”

She frowned. “He
was acting really strange after you left on Sunday. I didn’t see them on
Monday, but after the graduation he still didn’t seem like himself. I honestly
just thought it was because you weren’t able to be there.”

“If that were it,
don’t you think he would have seemed a little happier to see me just now?”

“Yeah,” Olivia
agreed. “Unless he was upset that he was only seeing you for a split second
before he left for Florida. He might just be having a hard time with leaving. I
know Matt is.”

I suddenly felt
bad for being so fixated on my anxiety over Spencer, when my friend had just
said goodbye to her fiancé. “How are you doing with all of this?”

Olivia looked out
her window and sighed. “I’m fine. At least while he’s in school he’ll get to
use his phone. As long as I can hear his voice I don’t think it will be as hard
as it has been for the last few months.”

“Christmas break
will be here before you know it.” I reached over and patted her knee.
Apparently the schools closed over the holidays, so Spencer and Matt would be
coming home for two weeks. I hoped that everything would be sorted out before
then, but if not, at least we’ll have that time to fix it. I could deal with a
month and a half of uncertainty, couldn’t I?

The rest of the
ride was as silent and reflective as the first half. If it weren’t for the Top
40 Hits coming from the speakers, we’d be a pretty pathetic sight. Olivia was
probably right though. Spencer had some huge changes happening in his life and
it was arrogant of me to think that his behavior was only because of what was
happening between us. It wouldn’t kill me to just be supportive and give him
time to adjust to his new life as a Marine.

***

“Good morning,
Elizabeth.”

I smiled at Eric
as he leaned casually on my ledge. “Good morning.”

“How are you
today?”

“Fine, thanks. You
have some calls from yesterday.” I reached for the stack of messages that I had
set aside for him and handed them over. He didn’t leave my desk as he read the
messages. Not sure of what else I should do, I turned back to my computer and
continued checking my email.

After a few
moments, I could feel his eyes on me. I glanced over at him. “Is there anything
else you need?”

He smiled. “No.”

“Okay, then why
are you still leaning on my ledge?” I laughed.

He abruptly
straightened, raising his hands palms out. “Forgive me. I’ll keep my hands off
the sacred ledge. You okay?”

I stiffened. I
hadn’t slept well the night before. After dropping Olivia off, I hadn’t gotten
home until almost midnight. Then, more obsessing over the Spencer thing had
kept me tossing and turning. I truly hoped I didn’t look as crappy as I felt.

“Like I said, I’m
fine.”

He scrutinized me
for a long moment, and I knew that if I didn’t change the subject he would
press further. “So, how do you like working for my dad?”

He narrowed his
eyes at me with mock suspicion. “Are you going to tell him whatever I tell
you?”

“Yes, he hired me
to find out what his team really thinks of him.”

“In that case, I
hate it. He’s a tyrant. If there aren’t better snacks in the lounge and
Kool-Aid in the drinking fountains by Monday, I’m out of here. In fact, I want
Mondays off, too. No one should have to work on Mondays. It’s unheard of.”

 
“I’ll pass that along.” I couldn’t help
but laugh at his serious expression.

He leaned farther
over the ledge and whispered conspiratorially. “You didn’t hear it from me.”

I snickered,
feeling the tension I’d been carrying that morning lift a little. It was nice
to joke around with Eric. The rest of lawyers at the firm were always so
serious. They scrutinized my every move as if waiting for me to make a mistake
and prove that I had no business being there. I understood the pressure they were
under to meet deadlines in big cases, so I didn’t take it personally. However,
the constant lack of faith mixed with my sleepless night had me on edge.

“Seriously,
though, I enjoy working here. Your dad is really something. I could learn a lot
from him,” Eric said.

“Yeah, he’s a
great lawyer. That’s why I’m here, you know. To learn from him.”

“I figured as
much. My dad had me filing for him in the summers to get me used to the
environment. It helped a lot when I was pre-law, and later in law school. It’s
never too early to start learning the lingo.”

I gaped at him.
“Your dad is a lawyer that groomed you to be a lawyer?”

“Well, when you
put it that way it sounds a lot less appealing than ‘joining the family
business’ or ‘following in my old man’s footsteps.’ I take it you’re resistant
to doing the same?”

“You could say
that.”

“I wasn’t. I knew
from a young age that I wanted to be a lawyer like my dad. It wasn’t just
because I wanted to do what he did, but I just knew that it was the right
choice for me. So I don’t feel
groomed.
”

“How did you know
it was right for you?” I asked.

Eric cocked his
head, thinking about his answer. “Well, as far back as I can remember, I loved
going to work with my dad. I would sit in a chair in his office with a pad and
pen, saying that I was doing depositions just like him. I would go interview
the other lawyers in his practice, and steal supplies for my ‘office’ that he
let me set up at the corner of his desk. When I got older, I always asked him
about his cases, and he challenged me to find other cases he could use as
precedents. It was just what I did. I loved it. Still do, in fact.”

“Wow.”

“I’m guessing
that’s not your reaction to your dad’s law practice.”

I shook my head.

“Well, your
resistance to the whole thing is probably because deep down you know that you
don’t want to be a lawyer. You can’t let someone else dictate where your heart
is.”

“No, I guess I
can’t. But honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever been that passionate about any
line of work.”

He chuckled and I
couldn’t help but noticed the twinkle in his eye. It was like he knew so much
more than I did, and I wanted him to tell me everything he knew. He was like a
hot version of Yoda. I blinked and looked away, embarrassed.

“Elizabeth, you’ll
know what you want to do as soon as you know. It’s no more or less profound
than that.”

He rapped his
knuckles against the desk and started to walk away, and I let out a breath that
I hadn’t realized I was holding. Before I had a chance to process any of that,
he was suddenly in front of me again.

“Yes?” I blinked
up at him, startled by his sudden reappearance.

He tilted his
head, studying me. “Go to dinner with me.”

My jaw dropped.
“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

“I’m not deaf.”

“I know it’s kind
of against the rules, asking out the boss’s daughter and all, but I figured you
weren’t really the type to always play by the rules.”

His smile was
infectious, and I couldn’t help the grin that spread over my face. Just as
abruptly, Spencer popped into my head and I closed my eyes. Even though things
were kind of uncertain with us, we were still kind of together. Or, at least
that’s what I hoped. I hadn’t talked to him since our awkward and wordless
parting the day before.

“I can’t.”

“Really? Guess I
was wrong, then.” He looked genuinely disappointed.

“No, it’s just
that I’m kind of seeing someone.”

He nodded in
understanding. “Of course you are. How much do you know about law school?”

The sudden change
of subject baffled me. “I know it’s really hard.”

“That it is. But
really, in order to get through law school you have to have a lot of
persistence and patience. Ever since I graduated, I’ve been looking for a new
challenge to focus that energy on.”

This time, when he
walked away, it was with a wink.