Accidental Love (Accidental Crush #2) (11 page)

"
I'm not so sure." Shane shakes his head. "I can't seem to do anything right in my parents' eyes. I can't live up to any of their expectations because they lost the only son they really cared about."

"
Shane, that's not true," I say so quickly I practically shout it, and Beth smiles at me.

"
She's right." She runs her hand over Shane's back, and then her eyes meet mine. "You're Ryan's little sister, right?"

"
Yeah."

"
Are you guys dating?" she questions, smiling at us both.

"
Us? No," we both say and start to laugh.

"
Just best friends," Shane says, and the way he says it gives Beth clue enough.

"
I thought so." She smiles.

"
You thought what?" Shane asks, his curiosity piqued.

"
It's just, I saw you with that boy before."

While
Shane turns fifty shades of red, I feel the sweat on his hand as he finally loosens it a little. "Um."

"
Shane, it's okay." She places her hand on his knee. "There are some things you should know," she says, smiling. "First, Roger wasn't perfect. In fact, he was in the middle of a big fight with your parents before the accident. We got matching tattoos with each other's initials before he went away to school, and your parents were furious." She pulls back her bangles and there, in small script on the inside of her wrist, are Rogers initials, RMT.

"
Really? Roger got a tattoo? Sweet," he says almost to himself.

"
And you should know that Roger's best friend in the whole world is gay." She gives Shane a knowing smile.

"
Jake is gay?" Shane whispers, cautious for even other people's secrets.

"
Yeah, he is. He came out to Roger his sophomore year of high school, and it never changed the way Roger felt about him. They were best friends. It didn't matter to Roger, and he kept his secret, well, forever." Her demeanor changes at the realization.

"
Wow. I never knew. Jake? I can't believe it. And I'm pretty good with this stuff." Shane grins, realizing what he just said gives him away, but I can tell he's relaxed with Beth. There's an unspoken trust with her.

"
Listen, I just wanted you to know that Roger was an amazing person, but he wasn't perfect. He would be so proud of you and everything you've become and are becoming. Don't worry about your parents; they love you, just as much as they loved him. It's easy to think he's perfect now, just know they disapproved of a ton of things he did." She smiles deeply.

"
Oh, yeah? What else?"

Beth laughs
. "We'll save those for next time." She gives him a sly smile, then her face turns serious again. "I miss him every day, Shane. It's hard to even look at you; you have his eyes." She smiles and gently touches his face.

"
Beth, we're getting ready to announce Prom Queen," one of the kids from Student Council interrupts. I didn't even see him walk over.

At that, we all get up.

"Thanks, Beth. I really needed this. I miss him every day, too," he whispers to her as he hugs her.

"
I needed it, too, Shane." She smiles and wipes under her eyes. "Good to see you again." She gives me a quick smile, and then she walks away with the kid from Student Council.

"
Thanks for staying, Ash." Shane gives me a look that melts my heart.

"
Anytime, Shaney, but I think you broke my hand." We both start to laugh.

***

Prom has surpassed all of my dreams and expectations. I'm fully and deeply in love with Todd, and I'm incredibly happy and relieved for Shane. I could almost feel the weight of guilt being lifted from his shoulders as we were talking to Beth.

We are all making our way into the hotel
when I finally have a second to talk to Blythe.

"
How's Brian?" I ask with a tinge of sarcasm, and she gives me a smile I can't quite read. "
Blythe
!" I lower my voice, "Is there something you need to tell me?" I pull her over to the sofas in the lobby of the hotel, and we plop down on them.

"
No." Her smile deepens. "I'm just having a really good time." Her southern accent slips through.

"
Really?" I question, full of surprise. "A whole new Brian and a whole new Blythe." I'm seeping with sarcasm, although I can't help getting a little excited at the thought of double dating.

She shrugs
. "I don't know. He's different lately, you know?" She kicks the heel of her boot with the tip of the other.

"
Interesting." I can't hide my smirk. "So you're officially over Ryan?” I'm treading lightly. I know she really liked my brother earlier this year, and I don't want to bring up old wounds.

"
Yeah, I think I am." She grins and shakes her head. "The accident changed Brian for the better." As our eyes connect, her smile brightens her entire face, making her glow.

"
So, is there a 'we'?" I ask, throwing her own question back to her.

"
Not yet." She smiles.

"
Here are our beautiful dates." Brian and Todd come up to join us near the couches. "We're all checked in. Let's get this party started!" Brian shouts at the top of his lungs, getting a few glares from passersby’s who aren't too happy prom's post parties are happening here tonight.

"
Taylor, un-attach yourself from Gretchen for a second so we can go up to our room," Brian shouts across the lobby.

I glance over at Blythe. I know a few months ago se
eing Ryan with Gretchen would have bothered her, but tonight, she couldn't care less.

Everyone starts to make their way to the elevators b
efore we get kicked out of the hotel, but Todd pulls me back. "Ash, can I talk to you for a second?"

"
Sure."

He looks around to make sure everyone has already cleared the lobby
. "I have something for you." He pulls out a key dangling from a red tassel.

I know this isn
't the key to our closet at school; this is a much more special key. This is a key to our very own room. This hotel still has old-school room keys, which is amazing.

A smile spreads across my lips.
"What is that?"

"
Exactly what you think it is." His smile matches mine as he leans down to kiss me. "Blythe, Brian, and Gretch helped a little. Gretch kept Ryan busy so Bri and I could check in and he wouldn't know, and Blythe kept you busy." He smiles his crooked smile that tells me I'm in big trouble.

Todd opens the door to our own room, which thankfu
lly is on a different floor from everyone else. My eyes instantly lock on a vase filled with red roses and a bottle of bleach sitting on the dresser.

"
I figured out the bleach comment." He smiles. "And I wanted you to feel at home."

I can
't help laughing. "Well, it worked." I step up on my tiptoes to kiss him.

H
e's already unzipping my dress. We both can't undress each other fast enough as we fall onto the bed. There is entirely too much pent-up passion exploding inside me. I didn't realize how badly I wanted this.

While h
is fingers explore my body, I can't contain my excitement. He traces my hip bone gently, then his finger slowly makes its way up to my jawline, stopping to caress each place it passes. He's wearing a wicked smile, enjoying teasing me just as much as I'm enjoying the teasing.

As w
e explore one another in new and exciting ways, I can't help laughing as his sweaty skin touches mine in places it's never touched before. I am completely naked physically and emotionally. I feel exposed, but in all the best ways. There is nothing to hide.

Then he quickly slides on protection. Well, I’ve never seen a boy do this, but it looks like he does it in record time.
I have no idea what I'm doing, but Todd takes it slow. He is gentle and wonderful as he guides me through everything. Each time we go a little farther, he stops to make sure I'm okay.

It hurts more than I ever thought and Todd senses it
. "Do you want to stop?" he whispers, his lips gently brushing my ear.

As always, I feel safe and secure with him
. However, this is almost to another level. My body is pressed into his without the usual barrier of clothing. It's my skin against his, and it feels incredible to be this close.

"
No," I whisper. "Keep going."

Our hearts are pounding as we
lie on top of one another. He takes it slow and the hurt slowly changes to exhilaration. We are both here in the moment, a moment I will never forget. His fingers entwine with mine, squeezing my hand tightly. I squeeze his hand back just as tight as we become one.

"
Are you okay?" he whispers, and I nod my head yes.

I don
't think I can actually form a sentence yet. I'm feeling so many things I've never felt before. I've never been this close to another person, physically or emotionally. I always thought I already gave my whole heart to Todd, but I realize now that I hadn't really, not until right now.

"
I love you, Ashley." He kisses my forehead with his soft lips.

I look up at him and our eyes lock
, our souls lock.

"
I love you, too." I'm still breathless and sweaty, yet happier than I've ever been before. "Thank you for planning this and for tonight."

"
I love you like crazy, Ash." He leans down and kisses me, and I feel just how deep our connection is as it is poured into this kiss.

Chapter
12: The Pool

Summer is finally here. Todd and I are closer than ever. Funny enough, so are Shane and Johnny. Ever since the talk with Beth, Shane has been more openly affectionate. I mean, they aren't "out" or anything, but he's a lot less cautious.

The sun is beating down on all of us as we sit by the glistening pool, listening to our head lifeguard, George, give a pretty boring pep talk. George is an amazing lif
eguard, but he's not the best public speaker. He's in his early twenties and has been working at the pool for as long as I can remember.

We
're at the annual summer kick-off meeting before they open the pool to the public. It's exciting because this is the first time we get to meet the other lifeguards and see who we'll be stuck with for the summer.

Todd, Brian
, and Ryan all have different football camps starting next month, so they couldn't work at their usual country club. But since they are basically like celebrities in our town, the town club is letting them work until they go away. I'm super excited because that means Todd will be working with me as a lifeguard, but unfortunately, so will Ryan. I'm pretty sure he has no idea what happened on prom night, and I hope it stays that way forever.

In walks a tall boy I
've never seen at the pool before. He's definitely got a swimmer's build; I can spot that from a mile away. Broad shoulders, chiseled chest, muscular legs. Summer is looking up. At least I'll have something pretty to look at while Todd is away.

"
Hey Ry, Todd, Brian." He gives them all a head nod. Of course, he knows my brother and the guys.

"
Casey, what's up," they all say simultaneously.

I feel Todd stiffen next to me
, which is strange because Todd pretty much gets along with everyone. I see him give Brian a look, and they both roll their eyes. However, Casey is in the middle of talking to Ry, so they are both oblivious to the exchange.

I can tell Todd is tense
, although he's putting up his usual I-don't-have-a-care-in-the-world wall. I'm instantly determined to find out more about Casey and why Todd is reacting this way.

The opportunity comes when
I'm finally alone with Ryan on our drive home. My fingers are nervously running across the black leather seat of his classic red Mustang as I work up the courage to nonchalantly ask him about Casey. I need to play this like it's no big deal, or I know I won't get anywhere.

"
So what's up with Casey?"

"
What do you mean?" Ryan glances over at me, then his eyes quickly refocus on the road.

"
I mean, who is he? How do you guys know him?"

"
He's cool. He's on the Ridgewood baseball team."

"
Oh, is that how you guys all know him?"

"
Yeah, from sports when we were kids, and Todd—" He stops himself. Here it is, this is what I've wanted to know, but this pause is making my heart start to beat faster.

"
Todd what?"

He glances back over at me
. "Nothing. It's no big deal, Ash."

"
Todd what, Ryan?" I say, enunciating each word as I lower the music.

He takes a deep breath, like he
's being forced to say something, which I guess technically he is. "Todd dated his sister last summer."

"
Oh. That's cool." I try to seem really calm on the outside, yet inside, my heart is racing. It all clicks. That is
the
girl from last summer. No wonder he reacted that way when Casey walked up.

"
Casey got pretty pissed, so let's just say Todd and him aren't the best of friends."

"
Why?"

"
Well, it is his sister." He glances back over at me. "Not everyone is as cool as me, Ash." He gives me that sarcastic smirk. "Guess Todd has a thing for sisters." He laughs, finding himself hysterical.

I smack him as hard as I can in the arm
. "Shut up, Ryan."

"
Hey, watch it. I'm driving here."

My hit unfortunately didn
't wipe the smile off his face. I so desperately want to know more about Casey, Todd, and this girl, but I know I need to tread lightly, or Ryan will tell Todd I was asking questions. I just want to know why Todd didn't say anything to me.

***

It's our first day working at the pool and my stomach is fluttering with excitement. I love the pool. I love the summer. I love the feeling of my skin soaking in the warm sun. I love being a lifeguard, s
itting up in that high chair, overlooking the sparkling water
. T
here is nothing quite like it. Now that I'm fifteen
,
this is my first summer as a full
-
fledged lifeguard. I can't wait.

Unfortunately, Todd and I
have been separated
. Since we're dating, it could be a potentially hazardous distraction; therefore, Todd gets the baby pool while I get the bigger kids pool. The baby pool is super stressful, so I'm kind of glad I'm not with Todd. The bad news is, I can't even see him from my post, but at least we have lunch breaks together.

When
Todd pulls up in the parking lot at the same time as Ryan and me, my heart instantly flutters to join my stomach at the very sight of his car.

"
Hey, Todd," Ryan shouts over to him as he gets out.

"
Hey, Ry, Ash." He gives me a smile that makes my knees weak. My heart always melts when I see him, but ever since we've been together, it's gotten worse. I can't control it, it's like my body is drawn to his. It doesn't help that he looks incredibly sexy in his red lifeguard board shorts with his light grey lifeguard t-shirt that hints at just how tone he is under it.

"
See you guys in there," Ryan says as he starts walking toward the main building, unable to get out of here fast enough. He's still not use to it, I guess.

"
Nice outfit." I give Todd a smile.

"
You, too." He wraps his arms around me and playfully tugs at my matching lifeguard t-shirt. Our uniform is similar except the girls all have one-piece, red spandex swimsuits and can wear whatever shorts we want until we get up in our chairs.

"
Did you lather up with sun block? It's supposed to be brutal today," he inquires with a grin.

"
Yeah. Thanks, Dad."

"
What? Is it a crime to care? Plus, if you didn't, I can help you with it." He gives me a playful smirk and a quick kiss as he pulls me closer. Then we start to walk toward the main building. I know, once we get inside, we're on the clock and it's hands off. I want to get as much of him as I can right now, so I pull him back.

"
Wait. One more." With this kiss, I twirl my tongue with his. I want this one to count if it has to get us through the entire day.

"
You're going to get me in trouble." He gives me a smile that says he's the one who is actually trouble.

"
Love you." I stand on my tiptoes to whisper in his ear.

"
Love you back." He leans down and nips my ear with his teeth.

I push him
away, mostly because I know, if I don't, neither of us are going to make it inside. I try not to laugh as I see him adjust his shorts. I know why and I love it.

He grabs my hand and interlocks his fingers with mine.
"Just until we get inside," he says, smiling down at me. Sometimes I still see hints of the No-PDA-Todd, but I kind of love that he takes work and rules seriously.

"
I'll take what I can get," I say, returning his smile as we make our way to the main building.

As soon as we enter the gates
, we let our hands separate. It's a little painful, but I know we have to do it. Relationship rules are pretty strict. When we finally make it to the lifeguard house, where we can go when we're on break, we each get a small locker to leave our clothes in while we're on duty. The "house" is part of your rotation; you guard for two hours at your assigned pool, then you get a half hour in the house to get out of the sun and cool down.

S
eeing Todd take off his t-shirt before he goes out to his post is enough to hold me over for a few hours. The world suddenly goes into slow-motion as I see the bottom of his shirt slide across every one of his defined ab muscles, revealing his beautifully tone stomach, chest, and my favorite—the indentation above his hips peeking out of the top of his shorts. I seriously think I need to wipe the drool off my chin.

As I make my way over to my assigned post
, the slow-motion replay of Todd's abs runs through my head, and I can't help the smile that forms on my lips. Just as I start to walk up the wood ladder to my chair, I see Casey walking in my direction. He's definitely not ugly with his wavy, dirty-blonde hair and perfectly tan swimmer's body to match his perfect green eyes and bright white smile.

"
Ashley?" he asks as he holds out his hand to shake mine.

"
Yeah, that's me." I slip my hand into his to return the gesture. Wow, he has a firm hand shake.
Geez.

"
I'm Casey." He smiles, revealing just how flawless and white his teeth are, especially against the backdrop of his sun-kissed skin. "We're on duty together." He gestures to his chair across the big kid pool.

"
Cool."

"
You're Ryan's sister, right?"

I try hard not to roll my eyes
. Seriously, can anyone just know me for me? "Yup. That's me."

He doesn
't give me the typical confused look, like how could I possibly be related to Ryan; instead, he gives me a smile that makes me feel a little uncomfortable. A smile that could be mistaken for flirting if he wasn't so smooth.

"
See you on break. Don't let anyone drown." He flips his head back to move his perfectly wavy hair out of his eyes.

"
Nice. You, too. See ya."

It
's so amazing to be up in this chair as an official lifeguard. I love the view from up here. You feel absolutely in control, or maybe it's the whistle that gives you that sense of authority. Speaking of my whistle, I've had to use it a ton and it's only been an hour. These eight-year-olds are rough, but the whistle equals power in their eyes and they listen—well, at least so far. Also, being able to threaten to kick them out of the pool is a huge bonus.

Casey is a pretty good lifeguard
. He's taking it way more seriously than I thought he would. Every time I glance over at him, I see the younger girls checking him out as they walk by. It's pretty funny how obvious they are. I hope I wasn't ever that blatant about it, though I probably was. It's also clear the young boys respect him instantly. I know this is sexist, but it must be a boy thing.

I catch his eyes wandering over here a few times
, and whenever our eyes meet, he smiles at me with his flawless white teeth, he doesn't look away. It's like he wants me to see him staring over here. He's a confident one for sure. The more I look at him, the more I think, if I was twelve, I would totally loiter around his chair, too.

Once w
e're finally on our first break back at the lifeguard house, I cop a squat down on the floor right under the air vent. I don't really care where I'm sitting as long as there is air-conditioning. The cool air feels amazing as it breezes across my sweaty skin. I love the sun, but being out there for two hours takes its toll.

Casey comes over and sits down on the floor next to me.

"Hot, huh?" He leans his elbows on his bent knees.

"
Yeah, brutal."

"
Was that your first time up in the chair?"

"
I was a junior lifeguard last year, but this is my first year in charge of a chair."

He raises his eyebrows
. "That's cool."

I find myself intrigued by him
, wanting to know more. "How about you?"

"
Nah, this is my second year, so I'm an old pro." He leans back and smiles.

"
Is that right?" I give him a sarcastic smirk back and he laughs. He's got a great laugh: strong, confident. "How long have you been swimming?" I ask, curious to find out more about him.

He runs his fingers through his shaggy
, blonde hair. "Eight years. You?"

I shrug
. "I used to swim competitively, but I stopped a few years ago. Now I just do it for fun."

"
Why'd you stop?"

"
I don't know. I still love the water. Life just got in the way, I guess."

"
Times up, guys." George, our head lifeguard, shouts over to both of us.