A Winter Affair (15 page)

He was shocked to see her. At least she had glimpsed him in the village so knew
he
was here, though suddenly seeing him like this was most unsettling.

His face was lightly tanned, though quite pouchy around his eyes, and there were deep lines round his mouth. The glowing skin of the young couple beside her cruelly showed how much older he had become since she had last seen him in the divorce court. He was wearing the red and blue stripy hat Lizzie had given him the last time they'd been skiing – the family all together. She didn't want him here, want the memories of those family skiing holidays to swamp her, when the children were small and Jacaranda was cosy and familiar and Harvey loved her – or anyway she thought he did.

‘You must be staying with your godfather,' he said, his voice loud above the chatter around them. He seemed pleased that he had found a reason for her being here, dodging his face between the kissing couple. ‘Are you here for Christmas?'

She nodded, tried surreptitiously to see who he was with, but it was difficult in the scrum to see who was with whom. She felt slightly panicky now as if she were imprisoned with him in this small and crowded place, without escape. What if she'd been standing next to him, pushed against him by the other skiers, feeling the shape of him, the familiar scent of his skin?

The couple between them snuggled closer, they were very young and obviously madly in love. It took her back to her and Harvey in their early days when they couldn't stop touching each other, reaching out as if to confirm the other was there. Then, as their life together went on and the children were born, he had become more and more restless until he had eventually drifted away.

She gazed out at the mountains and the hard light, with the brilliant blue sky and the white, white snow. In the spring, marmots came out of their burrows on these slopes and she remembered watching for them from the gondola, hoping to see one, though she never had. They wouldn't be there yet; they'd be snug beneath the ground in hibernation. She tried to think of them instead of Harvey, standing large as life, just a few steps away from her.

She wriggled round so her back was to him while she struggled to calm herself. If only she could escape. She didn't want to talk to him, see who he was with. He was quiet now, no doubt wishing he'd tried to avoid her.

They arrived; the gondola shuddering into the dock, the door sliding open, and everyone clattered out. Eloise followed them and, to her distress, Harvey was waiting for her by the stairs to go down to the snow.

‘I'm so surprised to see you here,' he said, slightly awkward now, the way he was if he'd been up to no good with some other woman and he knew she suspected him.

They were stuck in the crowd of skiers all trying to get down the narrow stairs to the snow. ‘Me too. How long are you here? Where are you staying?' She needed to know so she could lie low, keep out of his way. Her heart was beating fast, she wanted to get away from him, to cut away the memories of the good times that pained her so. She would not go out again until he had left.

‘Down by the old church, in a chalet with friends,' he said.

She waited for him to tell her their names, wondered if they were friends they had shared when married, or people she had never known and he had kept from her, or new friends that now she would never get to know. Or did he mean he was in a chalet with a lover, the woman in pink? He did not venture any information, and she was not going to question him.

‘So how long are you here?' he asked, his voice neutral, no doubt checking on her too, wanting to keep out of
her
way.

‘I'm here as a cook at Jacaranda.' She moved away from him in the melee of people towards the stairs, longing to be skiing, escaping from him, dashing down the slope, though he could easily catch her up, but surely he would let her go, be relieved that she had gone.

‘Cook?' he frowned. ‘What do you mean?'

‘The chalet's let out now for rich clients, their cook – or rather chef – ran off with a millionaire, so Desmond suggested I come out and cook for Christmas.'

‘But that's… quite a job.' He looked incredulous, his mouth twitching with a smile.

‘It is and I've got it,' she said firmly. Once she would have told him how precarious the job was, how she worried that Lawrence might think her not up to scratch and about Aurelia lurking in the wings willing her to fail, but now she said nothing, not wanting to add to her insecurity.

She moved as quickly as she could towards the stairs, frantic to get away from him, but she couldn't pass the other people, their heavy boots clanging on the metal steps as they went on down carrying their skis. Harvey was swept up by other skiers impatient to be down the stairs and back on the slopes and he was right behind her and for a moment they were trapped on the narrow stairs. He asked about Jacaranda, saying if he'd known they let it out he'd have told his friends, tried to rent it instead of the cramped place they were in now. She stayed silent; praying he and these friends wouldn't come up and visit.

Finally, she reached the bottom of the steps and joined the group of skiers putting on their skis. She wondered where Harvey was skiing. She wanted to go up to Tortin and ski down that way, have a good and challenging run, but she feared he'd planned to do the same.

To her relief, he said, ‘I'm stopping here for a quick lunch. Have you heard from the twins?'

‘I talked to them last week, I'll ring them for Christmas.' She didn't look at him, keeping her eyes on the run down to the lake now invisible under a deep covering of snow. It was so strange to be here standing beside him, the man she'd loved but now had lost.

‘Are they all right?'

‘Yes, don't you talk to them?'

‘I will, I've emailed them.'

She turned to face him then, saw a sliver of guilt in his eyes. Now they were divorced and the children grown and gone, did he pretend he was a free spirit with no ties at all? He'd adored the twins when they were young but found it difficult to cope with them growing up, becoming independent, glowing with youth and good looks while his were fading. But whatever games he played, he was their father and, despite everything, they loved him and they had many happy memories of the good times they'd shared. She'd done her best not to run him down in front of them, but now they were here together her anger rose.

‘You may be able to get shot of your wife, but you must never desert your children. They are part of you, and they love you,' she said, the words and ‘you don't deserve them' hanging between them.

‘Of course I won't desert them,' he protested.

‘I'm going,' she moved away from him to a clear patch in the snow, dropping down her skis ready to put them on and be off. ‘Please don't come to Jacaranda, it's a business now and I am working there.'

‘OK, enjoy your cooking.' He spoke, she felt, with relief, and he turned towards the restaurant.

A man she didn't know called to him, ‘Harvey, we're here.'

From the muddle of people and skis propped in the snow outside the entrance to the restaurant, Eloise saw, with a sinking heart, Aurelia emerge and head towards them. How had she got involved with him, just by chance or had she already been after him with her ‘Tempting Delights'?

‘There you are, Harvey,' she said. ‘Come on or we won't get a table.' She had obviously seen them talking and she eyed Eloise curiously before saying, ‘Do you know Harvey?' Her hand was on his sleeve as if she owned him, a look of condescension on her face as if she couldn't believe that they'd been talking together.

Eloise snapped her feet into her skis, her gloves were on, poles in hand ready to depart.

‘Yes, I know him very well, he's my ex-husband, the father of my children,' she said, feeling a tiny burst of pleasure, which was quickly replaced with anger at Aurelia's obvious amazement.

‘You two were married?' Aurelia said, unable to curb her surprise, staring open-mouthed at them both.

Harvey said, ‘Yes, that's right.'

Eloise didn't hear any more but pushed off fast down the slope, the wind catching her tears and turning them to ice.

For a moment Lawrence felt that he was the king of the world, standing on the top of Tortin, the largest glacier in the district, his body surging with energy. He'd begun to wonder if he'd ever get the guests out of the chalet, them all being obsessed by keeping in touch with their various businesses and seemingly oblivious to the call of the mountains, though it was true the weather had not been good earlier in the week.

He'd hate to be like them – he'd seen it before in other rich clients. They never quite trusted other people, never dared to leave their work behind in case it crumbled without their attention.

But then he supposed he was a little obsessive with Jacaranda. He'd lost money this season with the chef dramas, having to fly more out when Denise had done her runner with that multi-millionaire. He'd managed to find another chef, Paddy, whom he'd had before; only he wasn't free until the second week of January. So far, Eloise was working out better than he thought she would, though he still felt nervous that there would be some culinary disaster. His father meant well, wanting to help, but he hadn't been here for so long and he had no idea of the standards needed at the top end of the rental market today.

He started on a long traverse across the top of the glacier. He'd go on down now, get back to the village before the rest of them, so he could pick them up when they finished for the day. He hoped Theo would not take Gaby and Jerry too far away and would be back in time to help out if necessary.

Turning, he began to whip his way through the moguls; they were pretty relentless here and became more arduous nearer the bottom. There were quite a few other people on the slope, some not realizing how hard this run was, and having started off, they were now committed and were gingerly picking their way down, others just barging through, almost out of control, to get to the bottom.

He heard someone call his name and there was Eloise, pulling up her goggles so he could recognize her.

‘I'm on my way back,' she said as if he might be annoyed that she was out here instead of slaving over the stove back at the chalet.

‘Me too, in case the guests need picking up, and I've an appointment this afternoon,' he said. He noticed that her nose and eyes were red from the wind, giving the appearance that she'd been crying, but it was surely just the cold making them water, though she was wearing goggles. It made him say, ‘I hope you're not finding it all too much, Eloise. I'm so relieved they all went out today. I thought we'd be imprisoned with them in Jacaranda for the whole time.'

She smiled, ‘I thought the same. I wonder if they care if they're in the mountains or on a beach or wherever, being so glued to their laptops.'

‘I know, hardly worth having all that money if you can't enjoy it.'

‘I agree, though I suppose the weather wasn't very good the first days, and Debra doesn't ski but she likes shopping.' She told him about her buying a new jacket. ‘She's the one with the money. I had imagined it was Ken who was the rich one, but it's all hers and she earned it herself.'

‘She did pay the full amount for the chalet herself, though it could have been a shared account. Good on her. So does she keep Ken?' He smiled. Eloise had lovely eyes; he hadn't really noticed before, blue-grey with long lashes.

‘I don't think so. She said he does up flats and sells them on.'

‘Property, if only we'd bought up some of those houses in London before various districts were “discovered”, we'd have made our fortunes. Or even bought more chalets out here before the place became so fashionable,' he said. ‘Well, I must get on. Shall we go together or do you want to take your time? Depending on how far you are with the dinner, you don't need to be back until five or six, though of course it will be dark before then, but you might like to stay out and have a drink or something. Vera will see to the tea if the guests come back for that.'

She hesitated and he thought she was wondering whether he wanted to ski home with her or if he preferred to go on alone at his own speed. Skiing was a tricky sport and two people not being compatible on the slopes ruined many a day and even, in some cases, romances. He wondered why that thought had come into his head.

‘You start off and if I can't keep up with you, go on,' she said, pulling down her goggles. ‘Just go at the pace you want, there's nothing worse than having to wait for someone who's struggling.'

‘If you're sure,' he grinned at her, relieved that she understood. This could be the last time he had a good ski this week, what with the weather and having the guests, and Christmas and all.

To his surprise she kept up with him and he was struck with the feeling she was driving something from her, getting rid of some inner demons. Perhaps they were her anxieties at being a good enough chef, or perhaps she, like him, was so glad to be here finally, out on the mountains in the clean, cold air. He remembered how when he'd first seen her at the top she'd wondered if she'd been crying.

He didn't know much about her; she was his father's goddaughter, though he couldn't remember meeting her before, at least not when she was grown-up, although they'd often had a collection of people staying at Jacaranda over the years. He knew she'd recently got divorced and her children had left home, perhaps she was missing them, remembering the times she'd spent here before, when they were young.

He hadn't treated her very well, he thought with shame. He was just so anxious about Jacaranda, it needed urgent repairs, and he had three choices, as far as he could see: to shut it after the skiing season and get the refurbishments done then, or go in with someone else who could offer some finance, or, worst case scenario, sell it. He would
not
ask Desmond for money, he had given him enough already and he needed a comfortable income to enjoy his old age, but he must do everything to keep Jacaranda, for if he lost it, it would break his father's heart. But whatever his worries for Jacaranda's future he should not take them out on Eloise, he owed her a lot for stepping into the breach and she'd done it with good grace.