A Rocky Path (20 page)

“Hmmmm. There are some secrets that I intend
to keep.”

She punched him lightly on the arm and he bit
her playfully on the ear.

“Hey, that’s not fair. You’re trying to take
my mind off the subject.”

“No, I’m just trying to put your mind on
another subject.”

She slipped her hand up under his shirt and
starting rubbing his stomach. He moaned softly and took her hand
away.

“Please don’t do that, Patrick.”

“You’re going to make me lose control if you
keep touching me like that.”

Emily smiled at him. “Just lie there and
enjoy the sensation. You don’t have to do anything, just take
pleasure in the sensation. As long as you aren’t touching me, you
can’t hurt me, right?”

“In theory. But if feelings build up inside
of me, the energy may escape. Let’s not take any chances,
alright?”

Emily sighed in resignation. “Okay, but I’m
not happy about it.”

He pushed her gently back on the blanket and
bent over her and kissed her softly. Then his lips parted and moved
against hers a little more urgently. His tongue slipped softly into
her open mouth and explored its sweetness. The pressure of his
mouth on hers intensified and his kiss became deeper and harder.
She moaned with pleasure and pressed her body against his. She
could feel how hard he was against her and that brought her passion
to a fever pitch. She reached down to touch him. He groaned softly
and moved away from her. He rolled over on his back, breathing hard
and rapidly. She cried out in protest and tried to gather him back
into her arms, but he tenderly took her hands and kissed both of
them, then he released them and sat up. He turned his back to her
for a few minutes as he composed himself. She didn’t say anything,
sensing that he needed silence to focus on getting himself under
control.

“Emily, we are going to have to be more
careful,” he said shakily. “Once again, I almost lost my self
control. I need to be strong and not give in to the pleasure of
your body. If I hurt you, I would never forgive myself. I love
kissing you and holding you, but we keep letting it get too
intense. I just don’t have the control I need to make sure you stay
safe.”

“It looked to me like you had a lot of
control. You stopped, didn’t you? Even when I touched you, knowing
I shouldn’t, you were able to stop me. You were able to break away,
even when I couldn’t. You have more will power than I do.”

Patrick looked at her, his eyes still stormy
with passion. “I almost didn’t. I almost allowed things to happen
that could kill you. I want you so badly and it’s killing me not to
have you. And to know that I will never have you.”

“I feel the same way, Patrick. I can’t stand
it either. So our choices are to either not be together at all like
this, or to stay in complete control when we are kissing or holding
each other. Which is going to be harder?”

“I am.”

“Patrick….”

He smiled. “I’m sorry. It’s just that
sometimes humor can help us not to be so miserable. Emily, I think
it would be much harder for me to not be with you. I would rather
have just a little bit of you than none at all.”

“I agree. So come here and kiss me, and I
will try to control myself,” she said with a smile.

They lay together all night, kissing and
touching, but being very careful not to let things get out of
control. The dawn found them there, sleeping peacefully together.
Emily opened her eyes and saw Patrick lying there. What a pleasant
feeling, waking up with the man she loved.

“Hey, wake up sleepy head,” she said,
playfully prodding him.

“Is it morning already?” he asked, yawning
sleepily.

“Yes. And what’s with the yawning? Do ghosts
really need to sleep? That really doesn’t make sense, Patrick.”

“We don’t
really
have to sleep, but we
can if we want to. It’s a pleasure we can indulge in.”

“That’s just weird,” she teased. “Anyway, I
have to go. Hey, I’ve never seen you except in the evening and the
wee hours of the morning. I was beginning to think you couldn’t
appear until late afternoon.”

“I can appear whenever I want to. It’s just
that you happened to always see me then.”

“So if I came during the day, I could see
you?”

“Sure you can. Tomorrow’s Saturday. Do you
want to spend the day with me?”

“I would love that. There’s something I want
to try. I mentioned it before, but then we went through all that
with you leaving for two weeks.”

Patrick grimaced. “Please don’t remind me of
my foolishness. What’s this thing you want to try?”

“Something that might help get you home. I
won’t go into it now, but I’ll tell you about it Saturday. I can’t
come down tonight. Rebecca wanted all of us to go out to dinner. I
really need to go. I’ve been a real jerk for the last couple of
weeks, so I want to get back in everyone’s good graces.”

“I understand. I need to give you some space,
anyway. You do have a life away from me. And I won’t be jealous or
distrustful again. I promise.”

She kissed him softly and quickly, then got
up to go. He held onto her hand for a moment, then let her go. She
left the cave and went back to the house to start her day.

Chapter Thirty

Emily tried to sneak back into the house
without anyone seeing her. She thought she had it made as she
started up the stairs, but someone cleared his throat behind her.
She turned around to see Sam standing there.

“Whew, I’m glad it’s you. You aren’t going to
tattle on me, are you?”

“I don’t know. What’s it worth to you for me
to keep silent?” he teased.

“Come on, Sam. Don’t say anything, please. I
don’t want to have to explain anything to anyone. You’re the only
one who knows about this situation.”

“Of course I’m not going to say anything.
This will be our secret. But I can’t cover for you forever. You
probably shouldn’t be sneaking around all hours of the night. Now
you better hurry up and get upstairs. Everyone is in the kitchen
eating breakfast and they will be done soon.”

“Thanks, Sam. I owe you one,”

“A big one,” he said with a grin.

She hurried up the stairs and into her room
before anyone noticed her. She took a quick shower and got ready
for work. She didn’t have time for a workout this morning. She came
back downstairs to eat breakfast just as everyone else was
leaving.

“You’re a little later than usual this
morning,” said Jamie. “You didn’t work out either, did you?”

“Nope. I thought I would take a day off from
exercise today.”

“That’s unusual for you. Well, I missed you
today.”

“I’ll probably see you tomorrow morning.
Sorry I missed eating breakfast with everyone. I just slept in this
morning.”

Emily sure was glad she had gotten by with
staying out all night. But Sam was right; she was going to have to
stop sneaking around so much. She just wished that she didn’t have
to. She wished that her relationship with Patrick was normal and
that she could introduce him to everybody and go out on a real
date. She sighed resignedly.

She grabbed a quick bite to eat and went
upstairs to work. She was in a better mood now and she was enjoying
her work once again. Casper and Jake sat by her feet most of the
day as if they also knew she was happier and, therefore, good
company again.

When dinner time rolled around, the family
got ready to go out. As usual, Jamie went along, too. They were
going to a seafood restaurant that had just opened up and Emily was
actually looking forward to it. Now that she knew everything was
alright between Patrick and her, she was able to relax and enjoy
life.

“Rebecca, this is great,” said Jamie. “I
really appreciate you asking me to come along.”

“Yes, me too. I know you’re my employer, but
I really feel like I’m part of your family,” said Emily.

“I feel that way, too. And Jamie, you’re part
of the family, too. I wish your mother had come along with us,”
said Rebecca.

“Oh, this is getting way too mushy,”
complained Sam.

“You are an old softy, too, admit it,” said
Emily.

They all laughed and everyone had a great
time. When they got back to the house, they all went into the
library and played board games until the wee hours of the morning.
Emily felt like she was really among family, that she really
belonged here. She was going to need that support when Patrick went
away. And she knew that was going to happen. When she asked him to
show her the past, she was sure she would find out what really
happened to Patrick. And when she did, she would tell him and then
he would go away. And she would never see him again, at least not
in this life. But she was going to have to accept what was going to
happen and be happy for him. And she would survive this.

Chapter Thirty One

Saturday turned out to be a beautiful day.
Late fall in Maine would always be cold, but it was sunny and the
colors were vibrant. Part of her was excited, knowing that she
would be spending the day with Patrick. But part of her was scared
and sad, also knowing that she would probably lose him soon. She
knew she had to think of him first, but she couldn’t help but
wonder if she had it in her to be unselfish when the time came.

On a whim, she packed a picnic basket. She
wasn’t sure if ghosts could eat or not. The subject had never come
up between Patrick and her, and it had never occurred to her to ask
about it. So she took enough food for both of them, just in
case.

She went down to the rocks, butterflies doing
somersaults and speed flying in her stomach. Her butterflies should
have tried out for the Blue Angels. She started to the cave, but
Patrick appeared in front of her before she got that far.

“You’re going to have to stop doing that.
It’s really spooky,” she scolded.

He grinned. “I’m supposed to be spooky. After
all, I
am
a ghost.”

She smiled back at him and said, “I brought a
picnic lunch for us. I had no idea whether or not to pack you
anything. We’ve never discussed whether or not a ghost can eat. So
I brought enough for both of us just in case.”

“That was nice of you, Emily. The truth is,
ghosts don’t have to eat, but they can if they want to. The food
doesn’t give nourishment, but it does give pleasure.”

“So, um, where does it go?” asked Emily, a
little embarrassed.

He laughed. “It doesn’t go anywhere. The
energy generated by a ghost’s body just consumes all the food or
drink. It just sort of evaporates.”

“That’s pretty weird.”

“Most people would think it was pretty weird
that you are sitting here talking to a ghost.”

The mood was light, and Emily thought that
they both knew something more serious was coming. They wanted to
put it off as long as they could. They sat down on the rocks where
Patrick had spread a blanket.

“Patrick, I really want to know more about
you. I know so little about the times you lived in and the
different things that you went through in your life. I don’t
necessarily mean what happened to you in the end. I mean the good
things that happened, too. What your childhood was like, that kind
of thing.”

He sighed. “It was so long ago that sometimes
I feel everything that happened in my life happened to someone
else. I came from a wealthy family. I had a happy childhood. My
sister and I were always close, having no neighbors nearby. We rode
horses, played hide and seek…you know, children probably weren’t
that different then than they are now. We didn’t have video games,
of course.”

“What about your parents? Were you close?

“Yes, I was especially close to my father,”
he said sadly.

“I guess it was hard on you, knowing what
your father had done. Especially since the two of you were so
close.”

Patrick looked at her sadly. “I really felt
more betrayed by my father than I did by my fiancée. I didn’t
understand how he could possibly have done such a thing to me.”

“Here I was, wanting to know more about the
happy times in your life, and then I brought up what your father
did. I guess when it comes down to it, that’s what’s hanging over
you and, since I love you so much, it’s hanging over me, too.”

“Let’s spend the first part of the day
talking about other things. We have the evening to worry about the
rest of it.”

“Ok, I still want to know more about you. For
instance, was your personality very different than it is now? Or
did you change in the last 150 years?”

Patrick seemed to think for a minute, then
said, “I was really quite a hot head back then. My temper flared
pretty easily, but then I was over it quickly. Over the last 150
years, I have mellowed out a lot, but I really showed my temper
when I ripped apart everything in the cave. That shocked me as much
as it did you. I don’t know why I was thinking so unreasonably
about things. I should have given you more credit. I guess
everything that happened with Bridgett just came back to me. I
don’t think it was as much anger as it was fear and grief, thinking
you had abandoned me. But here we are talking about bad things
again!”

“We keep coming back to things we don’t want
to discuss. Maybe we are both just dark.”

He reached for her and pulled her into his
arms. He kissed her slowly and tenderly until she was breathless.
This man could make her feel so loved and needed!

He raised his head and looked at her. “I
thought, since we couldn’t seem to keep talking about pleasant
things, we ought to just do some pleasant things.”

“That sounds like a good idea to me,”
murmured Emily.

He kissed her again, this time a little
harder. His arms tightened around her as he explored the sweetness
of her mouth. She felt like she was floating on a cloud of delight,
and she never wanted it to end. Dizzy with desire, she pressed her
body against his, feeling like she wanted to just melt into him.
His hand traveled up her leg to the inside of her thigh. She let
out a little gasp as he touched her between her thighs, his hand
hot as if it were on fire. Suddenly, she couldn’t breath. She
gasped for air, thrashing against him. He pulled back quickly and
stood up, pulling her up with him. Slowly, she was able to breathe
again, first taking in shallow breaths, then deeper ones.