A Beautiful Forever (18 page)

“Nice?” she asks, grinning at me.

“Unbelievable,” I breathe out, grabbing her face and
crashing our mouths together. I need to have my way with this woman now.
Flipping her on her back, I drive myself inside her, pumping her hard as she
gasps silently which each thrust. Her hands fly up to the iron bed head as she
holds herself firmly, increasing the pressure of my thrusts.

Grabbing her leg, I twist her on her side, altering the
angle as I bring her home. She grabs for me as I feel her internal muscles
contracting and a small yell escapes her mouth. “Oh Elliot! Yes, just like that
– oh god, I’m coming!” she calls, not giving a shit about our housemates
hearing her.

Her body spasms and her moans grow louder with each thrust
as I drive myself inside her. Clamping my hand over her mouth, I can’t help but
laugh a little as she grips my hand tightly, pressing it firmly against her mouth
as she yells her orgasm into my palm.

I let out a steady breath as I slam into her one last time,
bursting again but still wanting more of her. I don’t think I’ll ever have
enough.

Withdrawing from her, I lie down beside her and pull her
onto my chest, leisurely stroking her back as we both breathe deeply to
recuperate.

“You’re going to have to get a handle on that yelling,” I
chuckle, knowing that anyone else in the flat has full knowledge of what just
went on in here.

“If you want me to stop yelling, you’ll have to stop making
me come,” she giggles, nipping her teeth against my chin.

“I don’t want that,” I say, hooking my finger under her chin
and tilting her face up to meet mine, bringing our lips together, sliding my
tongue over hers as I explore her mouth once more, trying to squash the nagging
thought in my mind reminding me that each kiss is one less I’ll get before I
have to go home.

We laugh into each other’s mouths as my stomach growls
loudly. “I think it’s time for you to eat big boy,” she murmurs against me
smiling. I get up, kissing Paige on the forehead and pull on my jeans from last
night. I was sure to unlatch the door and collect all of our clothes from the
entry way, so besides skipping out on the party, there shouldn’t be too much for
anyone to be annoyed about – besides the noise we just made... ok, maybe
they’ve got a bit to be pissed about.  

I open my wardrobe and pull out a warm jumper, looking over
as I see Paige watching me.

“Shame the weather isn’t warmer,” she comments.

“Oh yeah?” I say pulling her out of bed and hugging her to
me.  She slides her hands up under my clothes and over my chest.

“Yeah, I wouldn’t mind watching you walk around without a
shirt on all day,” she purrs, kissing me on my neck.

I laugh and kiss her forehead again, “Well, I would prefer
that you just walked around naked all day, but I wouldn’t be happy with the
other guys ogling your body, so cover-up and come and have breakfast with me.”

“Fine,” I grumble, half in jest, half serious. Elliot watches
as I pull on a pair of leggings and a long sleeved forest green dress that has
a fitted bodice and flows down to my knees. He looks at me and raises his
eyebrows. “What?” I say laughing at his expression, he looks concerned for some
reason.

“You just look…”

“I just look what?”

“Busty.”

I laugh, “Busty?” I look down at the neck line of my dress.
It's a simple V that admittedly, shows off my cleavage. I’m a C cup – it’s not
like they’re double D’s flowing all over the place. “And that’s a problem,
why?”

He steps towards me and runs his hands down the curve of my
body and rests his hands on my hips, “It’s a problem because I don’t want any
of the guys out there, looking at you and thinking the same things I do,” he
says lowly.

“Elliot, they’ve seen me in sexier things than this.”

“Yeah, and each time they make comments about you that
really piss me off,” he points out.

Tilting my head to the side, I sigh as I look at him in all
of his constant gorgeousness. “Elliot, it doesn’t matter what you wear, you
turn every woman’s head that you pass. If I can cope with that, you can cope
with me wearing a dress that shows a little cleavage.”

He lets out his breath, “Fine,” he says as I move away from
him and open the door.

When we walk out to the living area, Naomi and Gavin are
sitting on the floor either side of the coffee table playing a game of cards.

“Morning,” I say.

“Morning lovebirds, sounds like you two were having fun this
morning,” Gavin comments, grinning wildly. Naomi looks from me to Elliot and gives
us an amused smile.

“We missed you two at the party last night,” she says.

“Why? We were there,” replies Elliot.

Gavin and Naomi laugh, “Yeah for two seconds,” points out
Gavin.

Elliot tilts his head and shrugs his shoulders a little,
“Well, the flat was lonely. We came back to keep it company.”

“Yeah, whatever man,” Gavin laughs. “You missed a fun party
though. Shane got totally hammered and started dancing on the tables. It was so
funny.”

“Ah well, sorry we missed it. Where’s Brian?” asks Elliot.

“He’s gone to pick up the new girl from the airport, Jolene,
I think her name is,” answers Naomi.

“Is he in Shane’s car?” I ask. I meant to ask Shane what he
was doing with it before he left.

“Yeah, Shane said he can use it until it sells,” Gavin informs
me.

“How much does he want for it?” I ask.

“Couple of grand. Talk to Brian if you’re interested.”

“I will, thanks,” I say as I go into the kitchen and slide
bread for Elliot and I into the toaster.

He follows me in, collects two cups and starts preparing
instant coffee. “Are you thinking of buying a car?”

Nodding, I say, “Yeah, well, it would be handy don’t you
think? We could take a drive to the country - see some other parts of the UK.
Besides, I can’t stay here forever. After you go home, I think I should find
somewhere on my own.”

After you go home
, the words echo in my ears and
constrict my chest slightly. I don’t want to go and the fact she’s making plans
regarding what she’s going to do when I leave bothers me.

“Where will you live?” I ask, trying to keep my aggravation
out of my voice.

She shrugs as she concentrates on buttering our toast, “I
haven’t decided yet,” she replies turning slightly to look at me. When she sees
my face, she does a double take, sighs and turns to face me.

“You’re annoyed,” she states.

“I’m fine,” I say, totally not meaning it.

She takes a step towards me and places her hands on my
chest, leaning into me as she speaks quietly, “Don’t make this harder than it
already is, we both knew we only had a short time together… How about we don’t
talk about what happens when you leave? We can deal with it when the time
comes.”

I sigh and wrap my arms around her, burying my face in her
hair. I have three weeks left. I've never felt so powerless over my own destiny
before, not even when my father made me choose between Katrina and his
financial support. Back then, that seemed horrible, and although I probably
made the wrong choice at the time, I still had one. This time, I have to go
home, I have to leave her, or I risk not being allowed to come back.

After breakfast, Elliot excuses himself to go and have a
shower. I can tell he’s still a little upset with me for mentioning my plans
for when he goes home. I guess that was a little insensitive of me, I’m happy
to leave the subject alone, but we can’t pretend like it isn’t going to happen.
He needs to leave, and I need to stay.

Knocking on the bathroom door, I call to him that I’m going
out for a while, I don’t wait to hear his response, but the others know I’m
leaving so they can tell him for me.

I’ve told them all that I’ll pick up some milk while I’m out
but my true reason for going is to take some time to think on my own. I feel so
guilty about what’s happening between me and Elliot. He is so beautiful and
kind, and I seriously wonder why in the world, he would choose me. Was it just
that I was there when he was looking or was it some higher power that pushes
people together and takes away their good sense and reasoning?

My stomach churns as I think about him leaving because let’s
face it - I’m falling for him, hard. All we have left in this world is three
more perfect weeks together, and it’s more than I could hope for. Long term,
there’s simply no way we could make it, once  I tell him everything about my
past, it would be virtually impossible for him to look at me the same way he
does now. As much as I’d like to keep it all a secret, I can’t, I mean, things
would be fine for a while but eventually my secrets would push him away – I
just can’t pin all of my hopes on him.

I find a bench to sit on and scroll through the messages on
my phone, there are at least ten notifications, telling me there are voice
messages waiting – I know they’re from my parents but I haven’t been able to
bring myself to listen to them but their ever increasing number keeps staring
at me, taunting my curiosity.

I select one and my thumb hovers over the screen, just above
the voicemail number. Nerves and foreboding fill my body, and I can’t seem to
force myself to touch the numbers and make the call.

Blowing out my breath as I squeeze the emotion from my eyes,
I hit the home button and select my gallery instead. I select the most recent
photo I have of Elliot and I on the train when we were riding to Shane’s party
last night, I touch his face on the screen and flick to the next one. It’s the
one of us kissing outside the cemetery on that ghost walk he took me on.

Deciding to focus on Elliot and deal with my family issues
in three weeks’ time, I delete my voicemail notifications and place my phone
back in my bag on a sigh.

“I can do this,” I say to myself as I rise from the bench,
heading towards the supermarket to go and buy the milk to take back with me.

Paige has been gone for ages, and I’m starting to get
worried, our new housemate, Jolene, has been here for nearly an hour already,
and she’s still not back from getting milk.

I think about sending her a text or calling her, but I don’t
want to seem too overbearing or worse – needy, even though right now, I feel
like she’s the only reason my body allows me to take a breath.

Jolene seems like a nice enough girl. She's a Bondi girl
same as me and thinks we might have actually mixed at some point as she used to
date a guy I knew from Sydney Grammar. I probably have met her before, but she
would have been like every other girl I knew back then and overlooked me
because of my weight.

She keeps touching me on the arm, and I can see Naomi giving
me a sympathetic smile. She knows me well enough by now to know that I don’t
like girls who are all over me the moment we meet. I know I exploited the
reaction girls have to me for a while after I broke up with Katrina, but that’s
just not who I am. I like girls who like me for me, which is why I’m so glad
when the door opens, and Paige walks in carrying the milk.

As soon as I open the door, I see everyone sitting on the
floor talking around the coffee table. What’s the deal with the floor today? Is
there a broken spring on the couch or something? Then I notice the new girl,
Jocelyn – or something? I’m shit with names, so I’m not quite sure what hers
is. However, she is paying a lot of attention to Elliot; her hand is on his
arm, and she’s saying, “I can’t believe I have probably known you for most of
my life, and I can’t even remember!”

He turns around and sees me, jumping up guiltily and coming
over to greet me. My chest hurts, and I feel immediately sick. I was just out
agonising over my feelings for him, and he’s back here flirting with the new
girl?!

“Having fun?” I ask straight away. The new girl gets up and
follows him over.

“Hi, I’m Jolene. You must be Paige,” she says, holding her
hand out to shake mine. I look at it for a moment before I decide to give it a
quick shake. She looks at me with uncertainty, “Um, Elliot and I were just
catching up, turns out we knew a few of the same people at school.”

“I see,” I say flatly, I can feel that I’m being awful right
now, but I don’t want her around me. “Excuse me,” I say as I place the milk in
the fridge and walk to my room, locking the door behind me.

I’m not really sure what’s wrong with her. She just came
inside and was all annoyed. She was really rude to Jolene and didn’t even say
hi to anyone else. I glance at Jolene, who’s looking around the room awkwardly.

“I need to go and see what’s wrong with her,” I say.

“Oh!” she says, seeming a little confused before it clicks.
“Are you two together?”

“We are,” I confirm as I head off down the hallway and tap
on the door before trying to open it. It’s locked. “Paige,” I call through it.
“Can you open the door please?”

She doesn’t answer so shaking my head in annoyance, I stalk
back to the entryway to go and get my keys and open it myself. As I pass the
lounge room all eyes are on me, but the look on my face must tell them I’m not
in the mood for talking to them because they quickly look away and pretend to
be talking about something else.

We had pushed the two beds together last night, so I’m lying
across the middle of both of them, listening to Radiohead’s OK Computer, my headphones
blasting the track
Lucky
into my ears to block out any sounds around me.
I just over reacted big time. I’ve never done the jealous girlfriend thing
before – although I’ve never cared so much about someone before. In the past,
the men I was with were a means to an end, I chose them for reasons other than
attraction.

When the door opens, I sit up on my elbows, watching as
Elliot closes it gently behind him and climbs onto the bed next to me.