18 Thoughts (My So-Called Afterlife Book 3) (13 page)

“Here’s to new friendships and finding out answers tonight! Bottoms up!” She clashed her cup against mine, then took a big drink, practically finishing her beer in one gulp.

I’d never drank a sip of alcohol before, unless you counted the drop of Sacramental wine I tasted after the priest dipped the broken bread in during Communion. Something told me Tammy wouldn’t count that, and I knew she’d hound me until I had the full party experience. So I tilted the plastic cup to my lips and drank it all. When I finished, I couldn’t help burping and making a face.

Tammy laughed. “If I were to guess, I’d say that was your first beer. How’d you like it?”

I knew I should lie, make myself look cool. “Disgusting.”

Something told me the truth was better.

Tammy nodded, taking my cup from me before pouring two more beers. “Beer is an acquired taste. Cheers.”

This time, I shooed the cup away. “No, thanks. I think I’m a one-drink type of girl.”

As in that one beer is the only one I’ll ever drink in my whole life! Yuck!

Nic swooped in from behind and snatched the cup, taking a sip.

“Ugh, how can you drink that stuff?” I asked her.

She froze, sniffing near my mouth. “Oh my gosh! Did you drink your first beer without me?”

I shrugged. “Oh, right. Sorry. I didn’t mean to, and I definitely didn’t like it.”

“Well, too bad. You’ll have to have another one, with me this time.”

Shaking my head, I said, “No way. I’ll puke.”

Tammy giggled, already refilling her cup a third time. I was surprised she seemed so eager to drink considering all the problems alcohol caused with her dad. Maybe she inherited his alcoholism gene and couldn’t help herself. “You’re such a girl. Here, try one of these. I bet you’ll love it.” She reached into the cooler and pulled out a grape-flavored beverage.

“Hold up,” Nic hollered. “Olga’s first night of partying. I have to get a shot of this.” She grabbed her cell phone from the back pocket of her skinny jeans and snapped a picture. “I’m texting you the picture now.”

“Send it to me, too,” Tammy told her. “I want as many pictures of us together during our senior year as possible. Time to make some memories!”

I smiled, then guzzled about half of the bottle, liking the taste more than the beer at least.

“There, happy?” I asked Nic, then let out a burp. I probably should’ve eaten something today.

She yanked the bottle from my hands and drained the rest. “Now I am! Come on, let’s dance, girls!”

We followed her into the living room. As we swayed to “Haunted,” another original by the band, I felt all kinds of spooked out. My balance was off, I was already woozy, and I kept stumbling as I honed in on the lyrics.
But in this haunted house there’s danger in every direction/ I pray to God he would give me some protection/ And in this haunted house we’re not the same people/ But you, my friends, are my sanctuary, my steeple/ I hope if I die young ,I’ll find my way back home/ So you’ll feel me and know you’re not alone/ In this haunted house.

For the past five years, I heard Conner play guitar and sing every week. He had such raw talent, and I knew it’d be tough to replace him. But as I listened to them playing, I couldn’t deny Nate had skills, too.

Conner
. He walked in with a group of guys, slamming the door behind him. I recognized one boy with him, Dave, from my Driver’s Ed class, and I remembered he had been in my vision, too. I thought the lack of Conner in my vision was a bit weird, though. The group headed to the porch toward the keg, but they already seemed drunk. Brittany pressed against Conner like a kitten as he poured his beer. The walls closed in on me, the floor swimming, as I tried not to think about Conner hooking up with yet another cheerleader.

“I think I need a break,” I shouted to Nic and Tammy over the music.

They flashed me a thumbs-up and kept dancing while I awkwardly hobbled to the couch. As I sank down on the cool leather, the song ended and Nate addressed the crowd of twenty-something people gathered in the living room. His words barely registered as I watched Conner, the way he wiped his hand on his jeans when he spilled his beer, the way he cocked his head to hear what Brittany said, the sound of his laugh more musical than any instrument. All these gestures were so familiar to me, but the boy he had turned into since the accident was a total stranger.

When Nate belted out the lyrics to “Return,” Conner suddenly shifted his focus to his former band. He stepped into the living room, away from Brittany and the crowd he’d come in with. Dave followed, but Conner ignored him. Shrugging, Dave made his way to the couch and plopped down next to me.

“Hey, Olga. You want one?” He shoved a Solo cup in my face, filled to the top with beer, effectively sloshing it down my—correction—Nic’s white laced top. “Oh, my bad. It’s such a nice shirt, too.”

He proceeded to wipe the beer off my breasts. Yeah, I pretended that’s what he was trying to do. Not cop a feel at all.

Shoving his hand away, I said, “Dude, it’s fine.”

Absentmindedly, I touched the top of my sprayed hair. Tammy had styled my locks into a Mohawk by giving me three small French braids on each side of my head, then combing the Mohawk section in the middle until it reached her desired height. I was skeptical at first, but I had to admit I looked pretty tough, like someone who shouldn’t be messed with.

“Nice hair, too. You trying to impress somebody tonight?”

My head automatically snapped to Conner; I couldn’t help myself. And, boy, did he ever look like he needed a Xanax or Valium or whatever he probably took these days. His hands were fisted at his sides, and his whole body twitched, like he planned to launch himself at the “stage” any moment now. But he also looked like he fought the impulse.

Was “my” Conner in there somewhere tonight? As soon as I thought the question, his gaze shifted to me. He stared intently, like his eyes pleaded for help. Grasping on to the side table for balance, I stood and left Dave hanging midsentence, not that I knew what he had said anyway. I walked slowly, making sure my legs would work properly, still feeling a buzzed effect. All the while, Conner’s blue gaze drilled into me. I longed for X-ray vision, a chance to see past his bruised skin and into his soul to find the answers I needed. I wanted him to reach out to me, to tell me he was himself again and this would all be over now.

“Conner.” My heart pounded, and my legs shook just from being this close to him. “Are you okay?”

“Olga,” he said on a sigh. “Your hair.” He reached up, like he was going to brush a stray piece of hair away from my face the way he used to. But just before contact, he stopped himself. His whole countenance changed, and then his hand brushed the front of Nic’s blouse, A.K.A. my boobs, making me shiver. “You’re all wet. Was someone doing shots off your chest? And if so, can I be next?”

Ugh!
Why does he keep acting like this?

His hand still cupped my ta-tas; he traced his fingers over the slope of my breasts.

For some reason, I just stood there, frozen. Then I heard Nate’s voice over the microphone. “Hey, get your hands off her!”

Nate jumped in front of Conner, guitar still strapped over his shoulder while Kyle and Sean kept playing. Conner shoved Nate backward, almost making him fall.

“What the hell is your problem, man?” Nate yelled.

Kyle and Sean finally took that as the cue to stop playing and got behind Nate in a heartbeat.

“My problem is you’re here, playing my songs with my band.”

“It’s not my fault your actions caused your friends to drop you.”

Conner gave a low growl, foaming at the mouth.
Wait, foaming? What? Is he puking up his beer or something? Wouldn’t surprise me. That awful taste is still in my mouth.

Then, without warning, Conner threw a punch, clipping Nate’s jaw. Nate stumbled to the side, but Kyle and Sean caught him before he went down. Kyle stepped in front of Nate, waving his drumsticks in front of Conner’s face.

“Get out of my house!”

Panting, Conner circled me. “Fine, but I’m taking her with me. You took something that belonged to me. Only fair I return the favor.”

He grabbed a fistful of my Mohawk and yanked me backward against his sweaty body.
What the heck? This goes beyond douche bag behavior now. This is full-out psycho!

Nate grabbed one of my arms, effectively engaging me in a game of human tug-of-war.

“Like hell you are,” Kyle yelled. “Now, are you gonna let go, or are you gonna make all three of us beat some sense back into you? Literally.”

“Conner,” I called, my head aching. “Please. You have to get a grip on yourself. You have to stop all this nonsense. Please.”

He stilled, dropping my hair and closing his eyes for a few seconds. A passive expression spread across his face as he reached for the car keys in his pocket. “Whatever. This party is lame anyway.”

He backed out of the room, staring everyone down. Even in the dark, I caught the sight of his eyes flashing black when he turned to walk out the door.

What the heck?

Nate pulled me into his arms. “Are you okay?”

His guitar whacked my stomach, and I cringed.

“Oops, sorry about that.” He set the instrument on the carpet, leaning it against the wall.

I shook my head. “I’m so glad you saw what was happening and stopped it. That was… intense.”

He chewed on his lip for a few seconds. “I always see you.”

“And hear me.”

He extended his hand, and I took it. “Come on, let’s get some fresh air.”

Nic and Tammy ran over to see if I was all right, but I batted their concerns away and let Nate lead me to the backyard where our fellow classmates gathered around the flames of a bonfire, roasting marshmallows, completely unaware of what just happened inside. Nate handed me a water bottle.

“Thanks.” I took a sip, grateful for the pure taste, no trace of alcohol whatsoever.

Nate’s concerned gaze raked all over me. “I think it’s best you stay far away from Conner from now on. We can still investigate if you want, but that guy is toxic.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat.

He leaned toward me. “So is it me, or was that vision we shared pretty close to what we experienced tonight?”

I nodded. “Yeah, but do you think the vision we had somehow influenced how we acted, like our subconscious sought to fulfill it?”

Shaking his head, he looked down at me through the thick shield of his lashes. “You seriously think that’s all there is to it?”

No.
“Yes. I don’t know.”
That’s all I wish there was to it.

“Why do you wish that?”

Darn it!
“Because my life is already too messed up to add another complication right now.”

He moved his hand through his coffee-colored hair. “There’s only one solution. We need to meditate together again.”

“How will that solve anything?”

A pause followed. “You have to admit the vision might be our best chance at figuring out this thing between us. Maybe it’ll even help us solve Conner’s mystery. I can’t shake this feeling that all this weird stuff is connected somehow.”

He moved toward me, determination written on his face.

I placed my hand on his chest to stop him, but the feel of his hard body underneath his thin shirt caused me to rethink. His grin grew wider, and I knew he heard my thoughts. “Ugh! I can’t do this here.”

“Then where?”

Pulling my cell out of my pocket, I noted how early the hour was. Plenty of time before curfew to go somewhere else. “I don’t know. You want to go for a walk or something?”

Since neither of us had a license, it seemed like the most logical thing to do. I only wished I would’ve brought my jacket. By the fire, I was warm. Looking Nate up and down in his jeans and T-shirt, I realized how hot he looked. Hmm, maybe he could keep the cold away.

“No problem.” He smiled at me, taking my hand in his again, pulling me up.

Our bodies collided, and we both laughed.

“Hi,” I whispered, placing my free hand on his shoulder to steady myself.

“Hi.” He bent down and brushed his lips across my fingers.

Someone whistled across the bonfire at us, then shouted, “Get a room!”

The others laughed and snickered.

“Let’s go.” I dropped his hand and stomped into the house, hoping he followed me.

As I stalked past the kitchen, Tammy threw her arms around me. “Where have you been? It’s time to party!”

Cheers rang out from the crowd.

Untangling myself from her, I said, “Relax. I’ll be right back.”

Tammy sighed, long and loud. “But you’re supposed to be my date tonight!” She spied Nate behind me. “Is
he
the reason you’re sneaking out of here? Oh, did you guys figure out the vision thing?”

She squealed and clapped her hands together.

“You told her?” Nate eyed me with a stern expression.

“Relax, she’s so wasted she won’t remember any of it tomorrow.”
No need to tell him I informed her before she started drinking.

He smirked. “Yep, no need to
tell
me anything.”

Eek! I turned back around, only to bump directly into Kyle. “Do me a favor and take care of Tammy while I’m gone, okay?”

“No problem.”

Nate opened the front door for me, then stopped at Sean’s truck and retrieved a Darth Vader hoodie from the backseat. “Here you go. I
heard
you were cold.”

“Thanks.” I slipped on the black hooded sweatshirt.

“Which way are we heading?”

When we reached the end of the driveway, I pointed left.

“Right.”

“No, left.”

He laughed. “I know. I was just agreeing with you.”

“Oh.” I zipped up his hoodie. “So you’re a Star Wars fan, too?”

“As creepy as this may sound, a lot of things about you have rubbed off on me since we met. I watched all six movies over the summer, even read a few of those novels.”

“Cool. I don’t think that’s creepy at all. Hey, there’s a lawyer’s office in that old Victorian house.” I pointed across the street. “Since they’re closed now, we could sit on their porch swing and try the meditation thing.”